What Matters Most (3 page)

She felt the air leave her lungs. “Of course I was worried. You’re very important to Dusty.”

After she made that statement, he stared at her for a few more seconds, not saying anything. Sierra shifted her stance so that she could glance at him and still see the field at the same time. Not sure if he was unhappy with her answer, or if it mattered either way, she chose to say nothing and continued watching the game.

“So, Dusty invited me to lunch with his team after the game.”

“Oh, you should definitely come with us. He’s been bragging about you to his friends, and I know they would all love to meet you. From what I hear, some of the parents are interested in meeting you as well.”

Evan placed his hands in his pockets, which pulled his pants taut, which sent her temperature skyrocketing. It took everything in her to focus on the words coming out of his mouth. “Sure. I’m happy to go, but I was hoping you and Dusty would have dinner with me. I know it’s a week early, but that welcome home dinner would be great. I haven’t had a home-cooked meal in a very long time.”

Sierra knew she was in danger of losing her heart to this man, if it had not already happened. Although their relationship was a bit unconventional, they had built a friendship over these past few months. The details of their lives had been shared in every online conversation. The laughter, worry, and the caring between two people had flowed through each and every email and video chat they had experienced. Seeing him in person had solidified what she had been slowly coming to accept. She wanted Evan Knight in her life. Hell, she needed him. Now, if only he felt the same.

The team lunch after the game had been great, and Dusty was the center of attention as he introduced Evan to all of his friends and their parents. Sierra could see many of the fathers had wanted to talk with Evan about his time overseas, but he seemed to pull back each time the conversation became a little too inquisitive about what he had experienced. Luckily, Dusty’s excitement would save him each time, since he would pull Evan away to the next friend until they had made the rounds.

After what seemed like a whirlwind tour, Evan was finally able to sit down again at the table with Sierra. “Well, that little guy is like a bundle of energy. I clearly need to bottle that and sell it.”

Sierra laughed at the description, because that was definitely her son. “Oh, he’s just excited that you’re back in town. He’ll slow down soon enough, and he’ll be down for the count once the adrenaline is gone.” As she sipped her soda, she took a moment to just look at him and appreciate the man sitting in front of her. “Thank you, Evan.”

“For what?” He lifted one eyebrow in that inquisitive but sexy manner, and Sierra felt the butterflies in her stomach begin dancing a jig.

“For being a good friend to Dusty. You could have ended the emails at any time or given up on answering a nine-year-old kid’s questions, but you didn’t. You’ve been a good friend to him, and I just wanted to make sure I thanked you for that in person.” Sierra knew her voice reflected her nervousness, but this was important and had to be said. “Every time he saw your face come up on the computer screen for your Skype conversations, it helped to get him through the days and weeks until he heard from you again. That meant so much to him—to both of us.”

Sierra saw his knuckles clench and the skin turn pale as if he was preparing for something. “Actually, it’s me who should be thanking you. You and Dusty came into my life when I needed it. You’ve both opened my eyes to something I never realized I needed.”

Her heart pounded so loud, she wondered if Evan could hear the telltale sound. “What exactly is that?” Dare she hope that he felt the same way she did? Just as he was about to speak again, Dusty chose that moment to arrive at the table.

“Mom, can I have some money for the video games?”

Giving Evan a look that let him know the conversation wasn’t over, Sierra began to reach inside her purse for the money, but Evan beat her to the punch. She watched as he pulled a five-dollar bill from his pocket and handed it over. Once Dusty accepted the money, he pushed away from the table and ran back to his friends.  Sierra tried to pick up the thread of conversation, “So, what exactly did you realize?”

“Oh, well, maybe that’s a conversation for another day.” Foiled by a nine-year-old. She knew there was more to this conversation, but Evan’s guard was back in place, and it wasn’t the time or place to push the topic, so she decided to try another tactic.

“Would you like to come for dinner with me and Dusty tomorrow night? Your choice--we can treat you to a nice dinner out or we can make you a home-cooked meal.” Spending more time with Evan was her goal, and if she had to share him with a restaurant full of people again, then she would do so, but she hoped he chose the second option.

“A home-cooked dinner would be nice, Sierra. It will be good for me to just spend time and hang out with you and Dusty. What time should I arrive?”

She knew there was more to that statement than what he had actually said, but she would dissect his every word later tonight, when he wasn’t around to read every emotion and thought on her face. One thing she could never be accused of was having a good poker face. If she was feeling something, whether it be excitement, sadness, or desire, it could be read on her face and she didn’t want to play her hand too soon.

“Okay, how about four o’clock tomorrow? Be prepared to eat a lot, so come over with an empty stomach.”

“I’ll be there with bells on.”

*****

Dinner had been a great experience, and Sierra was pleased that Evan had wanted a home-cooked meal instead of going to a fancy restaurant. Not that she wouldn’t have enjoyed it, but Dusty always had to be on his best behavior when they ate out at restaurants, and with all the pent-up energy and excitement of having Evan with them for dinner, she knew it would be a challenge.

“Dinner was amazing, Sierra. I haven’t been this full in a very long time.”

Sierra took a sip of her wine before responding, “I’m glad you enjoyed it. Dusty wanted to make a little bit of everything for you tonight, so you can blame him.” Her insides were getting warm and tingly as they sat within inches of each other on the couch. Being so close to this man was wreaking havoc on her libido. Did he not realize how strongly he affected her?

Conversation had been fun and light, with Dusty regaling Evan with stories of school and baseball, and the hazards of being nine. Evan told funny stories of his Marine buddies and some of the funny practical jokes the troops had played on him and other officers. Some of the stories were so hilarious Sierra ended up holding her stomach and wiping tears from her eyes.  She had never seen her son laugh so much, or simply enjoy himself without holding a bit of himself back, at least not since his grandfather died. Sierra would always be grateful to Evan for what he had done for her son.

She felt a light touch on her arm, which brought her back to the present. “Hey, don’t worry about Dusty asking if I’m going to be around more. He’s just excited about having his new friend home. I promise not to wear out my welcome.”

Okay, this would be tricky. While she wanted to blurt out,
Come around whenever you want to,
she knew that wasn’t possible. She knew a lot about Major Evan Knight, USMC, but she was a single parent with a child and had to be a bit more cautious. Naturally, since the words had never been spoken by either of them, she wondered if Evan felt the same way about her. Did he even want to get to know her better? Or, now that he was home and could live his life the way he wanted, would he eventually disappear from their lives and move on?

“Evan, you’re our friend. You just got home, and we want you to be comfortable. We’ll do as little or as much as you want.” Realizing how that sounded when he lifted one eyebrow and gave her a sexy smile, she quickly amended her statement. “Um, so that you and Dusty can still be friends, but we don’t interfere too much with your life.”

“Sierra, you and Dusty will never interfere with my life. He’s a great kid and reminds me a lot of myself when I was a child. You’ve raised an amazing young man, and as long as the two of you allow me to be your friend, then I’ll be here.” The look in his eyes was telling her so much more than the words coming out of his mouth. Oh, goodness, she really wanted to kiss him right now. Which meant she needed to get up…right now!

“More wine?” She winced at the loud volume of her voice, but it did the trick. Evan moved back slightly and lifted his glass of wine to his lips. He took one last gulp of the very expensive wine he had brought with him and handed his empty glass to her.

“Yes, please.” His finger brushed up against hers and goose bumps rose along her skin at his touch. How was it possible that she reacted to him so strongly? No man had ever made her feel this way before.

Making her way into the kitchen, she stood at the counter for a few seconds to gather her bearings. Something about that man called to her inner core. Sure, he was drop-dead gorgeous, with his six-foot-three-inch frame, short dark hair, deep blue eyes, and muscles to die for, but it was more than that. Physical attraction was only a small portion of what drew her to him; there was something about the man himself. Her need to explore this pull between the two of them was driving her crazy.

Sierra couldn’t help but think about one of the Skype calls that occurred right before Evan arrived home. It had been after ten o’clock at night, and Dusty had been asleep for at least two hours when the familiar sound echoed on the computer in the living room. It had been a particularly long day, not because anything bad had happened, but Evan had not been able to contact them for a few weeks and Dusty had become anxious. When the Skype call had come through, Sierra found herself running to the computer so the call was not missed. It had been so good to talk with him. Of course, he asked about Dusty, but the majority of the conversation focused on them, their likes and dislikes, the worries a mother went through and the concerns of a major leading troops.

The worry and stress of not knowing whether or not Evan was okay for all those weeks just faded away as they spent hours talking and laughing with each other. Conversations like that, she knew, were the building blocks of their friendship and how she had come to care so much for him over these months. After all that had gone before, he was no longer just a friend for her son. As a woman, she wanted more from him. Now all she had to do was figure out how to grab hold of him and never let go.

This had to be handled the right way, because Dusty would be hurt beyond measure if something happened and Evan was no longer around. Yes, her desire and need for this man was strong, but her son was the most important thing to her. If that meant stepping back and foregoing her own needs and desires, then so be it. Dusty was her whole life and she wanted—no, needed—a man who would understand that. While everything in her prayed that Evan was that man, she would never take that chance. This situation had to be right for both of them, and changing the dynamics of her relationship with Evan would change her entire world. The gnawing question that kept raising its ugly head centered on whether or not Evan was willing and able to accept them as a package deal.

“Need any help?”

Sierra must have jumped ten feet in the air as Evan’s voice whispered those three little words in her ear. She must have been taking too long and he had come to check on her.

*****

Evan knew Sierra was running from him. He had noticed the change in her breathing pattern and the pulse at the base of her neck speeding up before she sped off into the kitchen. Oh, yeah, she felt the attraction just as much as he did. After giving her a few minutes to gather herself, Evan lifted himself off the couch and followed behind her. He stood there watching her for a few seconds, amazed that this opportunity was in front of him.

No one would ever call him an angel, and he wouldn’t have accepted the title if they tried. He had done things in the heat of the battle, in the name of God, country, and Corps, that would make most people turn away from him in disgust. But somewhere in his life, in his wicked, crazy, questionable life, he must have done something good to deserve this chance. Evan knew he would have to woo her and prove this wasn’t a fluke. This was not a fleeting wave of emotion brought on by an online friendship and his happiness at being home. He knew he wanted something more with her, to share more of himself and his life with her. Giving Sierra time to get to know him was one thing, but he was bound and determined to make her see the man standing in front of her.

Of course, there was also Dusty to consider. He would never do anything to harm that little boy, and he wanted to make sure Sierra knew just how serious about her he truly was before anything was said to Dusty about the two of them.

After a few more seconds, he moved away from the doorway to stand behind her. He noticed her eyes were closed and she seemed to be talking to herself.

“Need any help?” While he wanted to ask her if she wanted him, needed him, desired him, all he could muster were those three little words. All their emails, the Skype messages, and every detail they had shared with each other during the past six months had brought them to this moment—and those simple words. No one would guess they held so much meaning to him, much more than she could realize as he waited with bated breath for her response. When she jumped and turned toward him, there was no way he could stop the smile that spread across his face. Not even if he wanted to. “I didn’t mean to scare you. You were in here a while, and I wanted to make sure you were able to get the bottle open.”

“No… No, I’m fine. I was just thinking.”

He inched closer to her, his hands going on either side of her and resting on the counter. Her sensuous, full lips were just inches away from his. God, she was tempting him like nothing else could. “About what, exactly?”

“Um…well…” He noticed she couldn’t seem to take her eyes off his lips.

“It’s okay, I already know.” With that, he slowly lowered his lips to hers, his mouth pressing lightly against hers as he gave them both time to get used to the sensation. Such a simple thing, but so much was said in that tender but passionate kiss. When she gave a little throaty moan, he took that as his cue to deepen the kiss. His tongue snaked out, rubbing against her lips, coaxing her to let him in.