Whatever It Takes (4 page)

"If she asked me one more time to see his picture, I was going to lose my shit," I complained to my father. Slamming down the beer onto his kitchen table.

He gripped my shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "Calm down, son. We already won one battle; that piece of shit filed for a divorce claiming she abandoned him. White told me that he got it done within a day of leaving."

"That is fantastic. She's mine."

"Son, I don't mean to say anything against her..."

I stopped him before he had gone any further and I got pissed off. "Then don't. Trust me, anything you have to say she brought up, but I reminded her that judging by the day we met, she looked frightened of him. All her dreams seem like she needs the love that she was missing."

“I get that. So far, I find her lovely, but I don’t know her.”

“Well, what I know I love.”

“How long have you put off showing her that picture?”

“It’s been almost a month since she asked to see that bastard’s fucking face.”

“I can’t believe you got away with it for that long.”

“Me too, but she’s been trying to remember everything on her own.”

“I have to ask. How intimate have you two been?”

“We talk every day, Dad. That’s it. Granted I did kiss her once, and it was fucking amazing, but she cried out when I held her too hard. I want to kiss her every time I’m near her, but I’m afraid I’ll maul her, and she’s still recovering. After that time, I pulled back and just talked to her.”

“Don’t worry, son. Just take your time to get to know her some more before you act again,” he said, attempting to comfort me.

We had a long conversation about the ranch and the inn, but all talks of Ana were over. I didn’t want to hear anything against the relationship, and he spoke his piece for the time being. I didn’t want to press him because he was still really worried about me. I knew that he was just because he was my father and I hadn’t had a real serious relationship—ever. Even when my ex dumped me for someone else when I needed the support, I wasn’t invested in us. With Ana, I had no choice but to accept that I couldn’t exist without her. I needed her beyond belief. There was nothing to for it, I was hooked.

I was going out of my mind waiting for my memory to come back. I had moments that were clearer than others, but they were all just fragments.

I finally made it downstairs last week. It should have been sooner, but Will was paranoid about Santini’s men, and I was seduced by his tender caring that I didn’t fight him too hard on it. Gosh, I kept forgetting that my last name was Santini, too.
How could I marry a man like that?

I’d just stepped into the kitchen, and Davy was standing there getting some lemonade. “Oh, hello, Ana. How are you feeling?”

“I’m doing well. Thirsty?”

“Yes,” he said, pouring himself another glass. “It may be cold, but wrangling up a loose bull could bring the sweat out of anyone. Geez. It was a real bitch.” 

“I’m sure it is.” I looked and saw his cell phone on the table. “Can I see your phone really quickly?”

“Sure thing,” he absently replied, handing it to me without thinking. They knew it was against the rules just in case I got any ideas. I wasn’t a hostage, but sometimes he could make it feel that way.

“Oh, shit. Give it back, Ana.”

“No. I need to see. What the fuck is the big deal? Is the guy some heartthrob and William thinks I’m going to run back to him?” I asked begrudgingly.

“Fine. I actually agree with you, but you don’t even know how to use it. Hand it over and I’ll show you.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Sweetheart, I think it’s what you need. We all know that Will is becoming a little irrational. I swear that I wouldn’t do that to you.”

Before I could stop him, he snatched it from me. “Give it back!”

“Chill before you hurt yourself,” he said while doing something on his phone. He looked up at me. His face serious. “Are you ready for this? Maybe you should sit.”

I pulled the chair out and took a seat. Suddenly, I was nervous, but I did as he asked and sat down.

He handed me the phone with the back facing me. Slowly, I turned it around and the moment my eyes focused on the image on the screen, I dropped the phone. It hit the floor loudly, crashing and probably cracking on impact. Thoughts, memories, pain, tears flashed through my head. I started screaming and crying. My body started to convulse. I shook and fell from the chair, collapsing on the floor.

The first memory was one of the worst. I felt his hands on my neck, squeezing as he demanded I submit my body to him on our wedding night. When he took my virginity, I felt numb inside and received a beating for crying afterward. I shook for days after that night.

I remembered being forced into marriage with him. Two months after we met, he asked me to marry him. I kept telling him that I needed time, but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. The wedding was rushed, and I was scared. I remembered staring at myself in the mirror and hating how stupid I could be. The entire time I had to smile and laugh, or he’d torture and kill my family. What family, I don’t know. There was this fleeting image of this one woman who I kept thinking was me, but I’m not sure. She had to be my family or me. The person was dancing with another guy there. Maybe she was married to him. If she were real, would she tell him where I was at? I was shaking the whole time.

I felt myself being lifted off the ground and into strong arms. Then I heard a roar. “What the fuck are you doing carrying her?”

I looked up at Davy holding me, and I nodded to him. He let me down, and I rushed into William’s arms. I ignored the pain that ran up my arm from the impact of crushing into his large frame. “You were right. You were right. Seeing his face would freak me out.”

“She…” Davy started to speak, but I had to take the blame from him.

“I stole his phone and looked for a picture of him. He tried to get the phone from me but didn’t want to hurt me, so he showed me how to find it, and I lost it.”

“Sorry, boss. She was insistent.”

“No, No. I was coming home to finally man up and show her. I knew it was wrong to keep Ana on edge.” He looked down at me and said, “Sugar, I would do anything to keep you happy and safe.”

“Thank you, Will, but it worked. Some of my memories are back. Seeing his face triggered memories that I don’t think I could have handled the first time I asked.”

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Davy said walking out the door.

“Come on, Ana. You can tell me all you remember.”

We walked into the living room where we sat down on the sofa. He tried to get me to sit in his lap, but I didn’t want to be in his arms as I explained my past with him. The wicked past I could remember. All I knew was that I wasn’t willing, and that made me feel good to know I wasn’t a monster as well.

“I can’t remember everything, but I do have memories of working in a restaurant when we met. He approached me and made an introduction. I wasn’t sure that it was a good idea to talk to him and sent him on his way, but he came back the next day and the next. Each time he returned, he looked more and more normal. The suits were gone, and he dressed like a guy that I could talk to. I didn’t know what he did at the time because he looked like a wealthy businessman. Truth be told, I had no idea he was a gangster until it was too late. He forced me into a marriage I didn’t want and took me by force on our wedding night. Anytime he wanted sex, it was by force.” I could feel the anger roll off Will’s shoulders. He was angry and volatile.

Standing up quickly, he paced the floor, stopping to stand in front of me with his eyes full of regret. “I could kill him, myself. Damn it, Ana. I wish I could have been there to protect you. Shit, baby, I’m so sorry.”

I grabbed his hand, pulling him to sit next to me. “Will, it’s not your fault. We met for a split second,” I said trying to calm his guilt.

“Yeah, but I let him get his hands on you after we met.”

“Don’t blame yourself for that. He was armed with ten of his men and technically, he wasn’t doing anything to me at that moment. I hoped you’d walk away without trying to take me with you. He would get mental when any man came near me. It was sick how mean he would be when a server would ask me what I would like to drink.”

“I’m sorry for the life you had with him,” he said softly, caressing my hand.

“It wasn’t that long. We’d been married for only a few months before that day. He already threatened to kill me if I tried to leave again.”

“I should have done something. I thought about it the rest of the day. It wasn’t like me to get involved in other people’s business, but I wanted to beat him to the ground on sight. It was crazy how much a simple touch of your arm had pissed me off. I walked off thinking that me doing something would make things worse.”

“It would have. He didn’t even mention you to me before he attacked me. You see, I was taking birth control, and he found it, or rather one of his men found it. They snooped through my things and found my secret compartment. He beat me to a pulp then left the room. I passed out and thought I had made a call at some point, but I couldn’t be sure. It was all hazy after the first few punches. Then he came back, and I remember being hauled around and dumped into the trunk.”

I started to cry hard, and William pulled me into his lap. “I need to finish,” I said running my hand along his cheek. He had a sexy beard starting to grow. Closing his eyes, he absorbed my touch. The memory of our passionate kiss rushed through my head and made me want to lean in and kiss him, but I needed to finish my story. “He told me I broke his heart and that he loved me before pushing me over the edge. I remember the pain, then you came. I looked into your eyes and all I could remember was the morning and the way you had looked at me.”

“There’s a lot I haven’t told you because there was so much going on, and some things I have wanted to tell you but have been too ashamed to.”

“Are you a killer, too?”

“No, I’m not, but I’ve been pretty sheltered all my life.”

“So that doesn’t sound so terrible. What do you mean? Did you marry someone out of high school then divorce? Do you have children with someone?”

“No, I didn’t, and I don’t have any children yet. But for the first time in my life, I’ve got hope that that’ll happen. I was a bull rider. Not a very good one, but I was trying to follow some of my friends. It didn’t end well. My girlfriend at the time had dared me to take on a dangerous bull. It was the orneriest son of a bitch around. I didn’t want to do it, but I didn’t want to look weak. I’d come in last place during my last ride and doing that two times in a row would have been crushing. It was stupid, but I was young. At first, I was having the best ride of my life, but then the bull caught me at the end and gored me right in my pelvis. I spent two months in the hospital and rehabilitation learning how to do everything all over again.”

I gasped, “That’s so terrible. What happened after?”

“During that time, she left me for the next rider in another town. I didn’t even hate her for leaving, but I hated her for making me doubt myself as a man. After that, well, let’s just say, my dick didn’t work right again. I couldn’t keep an erection, and hell, everyone in our small town outside Aspen knew that. I was useless as a man, but I needed to make a living or leave town. I chose to get back at the bull and start a cattle ranch. It was successful, and that bastard became a steer after making me my first million. I couldn’t have a family or get off again, but I was going to have everything else. I know it sounds pathetic, but hell, I was too young to give up on everything.”

“It’s not pathetic. If I were you, I would make myself happy any way I could. I’d buy everything, challenge myself, and live life as best as I could. You didn’t give up on life, and that is more than many can say.”

We stared into each other’s eyes for a moment as I thought about what William said.
If his cock didn’t work anymore, how could have hopes for the future?
“William, how could your plans change for the future? In vitro fertilization or something?”

“No, I plan to make love to you, over and over again until we’re blessed with baby after baby.”

I swallowed hard thinking I couldn’t be that lucky. I loved him with every fiber of my being. “William, if you don’t kiss me right now, I think I might cry.”

“Well, sugar, I can’t have that,” he whispered before cuddling me tighter into his lap. It was then that I felt that he obviously could get it up. His hands wrapped themselves around me, one on my waist and the other in my hair, bringing my lips to his. Our mouths met tenderly, immense pleasure rushing from our lips to our tongues and running through my whole body. I melted into his grasp. The rough, tight hold didn’t match the gentle way our lips met. It was like he was holding back, but it was still amazing. I’d never been kissed like I meant so much to someone until him.

He lifted me so that my body straddled his. We stopped when our breathing demanded so. I panted, “Wow, I guess I’m feeling better.”

“Ana, I know you’re scared, and you’ve already been through someone controlling your life, but I’ve loved you since I watched you look up at me and call me husband. Will you marry me?”

“You’ve been controlling, but I know that your domination has been for my protection. I don’t deserve someone like you, but I cannot let you find someone else. I will marry you.”

Sealing my answer with a kiss, he pulled back and whispered, “There’s no one else.”

“I love you, William.”