When Heaven Weeps (46 page)

“Morality. And how does morality affect us in this contract?”

“That depends. It contains a clause that gives Dreamscape the right to pull the plug in the event that the moral character of the story's subject comes under question at any time before the movie's release date. The subject of the picture is you, Jan.”

The statement dropped in Jan's mind like a small bomb. He blinked. “
My
moral integrity? What does that mean? They're already taking exception to my mistake yesterday? Or is it you, who are making more—”

“Not the shooting, you idiot! Stupid as that was—”

“Please don't interrupt me, Roald!” Jan said. “At least give me that courtesy.”

“Of course.”

“And if it's not the shooting, then what?”

Roald didn't respond. Frank did. “It's the woman, Jan. You were warned about her, weren't you?”

Jan's mind swam, too stunned to piece their reason together.

“I told you she was a risk,” Roald snapped. Karen still hadn't spoken. She simply rocked back in her chair, arms still folded. Roald continued. “The studio is putting millions on the table, producing a picture that views the world through an exceptional lens—the eye of Jan Jovic, a man who has learned of love through the brutal lessons of war. And now they discover their
hero
is living with a . . . an unseemly woman. I told you she was a bad idea, didn't I? I sat right here and told you that this junkie of yours could ruin everything. And did you listen? No. Instead you go off and marry her, of all things!”

“And you know nothing, Roald!”

“No, of course I don't. That's why you ignored my advice to begin with. Because I know nothing. And you, the white crusader, know everything.”

“Okay, guys,” Karen said. “We're still on the same side here.”

“Are we?” Roald shot back. “I'm on the side of getting this movie made, of getting this message out. And frankly I don't know what side Jan's on anymore.”

“I'm on the side of love,” Jan said. “The same side you were on at one time. It's the heart and soul of my story.”

“Well, now your love is going to get
The Dance of the Dead
canceled. Your relationship with Helen undermines your moral authority.”

The notion felt like a sick joke to Jan. “We're married, for heaven's sake! How could morality be an issue in marriage?”

Roald shook his head. “You really should have listened to me. It's the appearance of evil that matters, Jan. How are they going to sell a movie about one man's discovery of God and morality when his morals are in question? Isn't that what I told you?”

“And I'm asking you how my morality is in question!”

“Because appearances do matter, Jan. And your . . .
wife
does not give off the best appearances!”

Jan wanted to strike the man with his fist. He rose and stood against the conference table, shaking with rage.

“Now you want to shoot me like you did Mr. Lutz?” Roald asked.

“Okay, Roald,” Karen said. “You've made your point.” She turned to Jan and her eyes were emotionless. “Sit down, Jan.”

Jan forced himself back into his chair. Frank and Barney sat side by side, like a jury studying the cross-examination.

“Dreamscape has given us a condition for continuance,” she said. “They won't make the movie with a questionable moral dilemma hanging over your head.”

“That's utterly ridiculous! And what's ‘questionable' supposed to mean anyway?”

“It means,” Roald said, “that either the woman goes or the movie goes. That's what it means.”

“That's absurd! They want me to divorce? And they see that as moral? No studio could be so stupid! Someone else will buy the movie rights!”

“No they won't. Dreamscape has already made it clear that they won't sell the rights. Not as long as there's an adulterous relationship in the mix.”

“I am
not
in an adulterous relationship! Who would make such a claim?”

Karen spoke. “They didn't say you were committing adultery—they claim that Helen's still seeing Glenn Lutz.”

The room fell to silence. A sweat broke out on Jan's forehead. “The movie is about me, not Helen. And how would Dreamscape know of Glenn?”

“You are married to Helen. It looks bad,” Roald answered, holding his eyes on Jan. “And Dreamscape would know about Glenn because for all practical purposes, Dreamscape is Glenn.”

Dreamscape was Glenn? But how?

Then Jan knew how. Glenn had set this up for one purpose and one purpose only. The man would stop at nothing to get Helen back!

“So, Glenn acquires
The Dance of the Dead
through Dreamscape and he tells you that unless I end my relationship with Helen,
his
lover, then he won't make the picture. Is that about it?” Jan knew that a tremble accompanied his words, but he no longer cared. “And that doesn't sound odd to you? This pig is the devil himself and you don't see it, do you? It seems that I have grounds to sue him for manipulating the terms of the contract!”

“It doesn't matter how it sounds to us, Jan,” Karen said. “He paid for the rights to the movie and we signed a contract that gives him the technical right to cancel the movie on these grounds. And now that you've assaulted him, he no doubt has other grounds.”

“And he assaulted me. When the world discovers that, Glenn won't have a leg to stand on.”

“So you say, but he has a voice as well. And either way he'll probably sue for all moneys already paid. Am I right, Roald?”

“Yes. That's right.”

Jan faced the man. “So you talked to him yourself, Roald? You plotted behind my back with this devil?”

“Yes, I spoke to him. He called me. What did you want me to do? Refuse a call from the man behind our futures?”

“Your future, perhaps, but not mine. I'll
never
give in to a monster like Glenn.”

“You will refuse, then? You'll kiss off seven million dollars and this entire ministry and everything you've lived for? Over this one lousy woman?”

Jan slammed his hand on the table and they all jumped. “She is
not
one lousy woman! She is everything! I have lived my life preparing to love her. And nothing— not seven million dollars, not a hundred million dollars—nothing will come between us! Do you understand this, or do I need to stamp it on your forehead?”

Roald's face flushed red. “You're throwing everything away! Everything!”

“Not Helen. I will not throw Helen away.
She
is everything! Nothing else matters!” Jan sat back and breathed heavily. “How can you sit there and suggest that I divorce my wife so that you can line your pockets with gold?”

Roald's face turned red and for a moment Jan thought he might leap over the table and attempt to remove his head.

“I don't think that's what Roald had in mind,” Karen said with an apologetic smile. “I think he's genuinely concerned with the bigger picture here—”

“Is that what you think?” Jan interrupted. “And what did you have in mind, Karen? That somehow in this mess you would be vindicated?”

She appeared to have been slapped. Karen pulled herself up to the table. “Now you listen to me, you meathead. First of all, you must know that if this deal falls through it will be the end of the ministry. You ever think of that? The book will be canceled, the tours, everything will go away without the movie. A million lives will be impacted. You must see that. And the fact that you're living with—or married to—a woman who's in an adulterous affair with another man does give you right of divorce, doesn't it? In many circles it would be the only moral thing to do. What Roald's suggesting isn't that unreasonable.”

Jan stared at Karen, wondering what other motive lay behind her sudden plea for reason. “Then, you don't understand either, Karen. The world doesn't turn on reason alone. It's a matter of love. I love her. Desperately. Surely
you
, of all people, can understand that.”

He saw a flicker of surprise in her eyes. She did not answer.

Barney cleared his throat and spoke for the first time. “You can't always follow your heart,” he said. “Not when it defies reason. God's given man a mind for good reason. We all know the pull of love. Love is blind and full of passion and, yes, reason hardly stands a chance. But it must, don't you see? All that is good and decent depends on it. You cannot just leave your mind to follow your heart's whims. There are greater issues at stake.”

Jan felt anger rise again. “Such pretty words from a great lover, I am sure. But let me tell you, Father Micheal's love for God was not born of his mind alone. No, it came first from his heart. He was desperate for God and glad to die for him. Your words of reason will drain the heart of its power.”

He turned to the others, leaning forward now. “I'll tell you, I've been given a very small slice of God's love for Helen and it makes my knees weak in her presence. You're suggesting I face God and tell him to keep his heart? Because a leader in the church said it was
unreasonable?
That's your position on this matter?”

“Of course not!” Frank said. “We're telling you to do what is right! But I can see that you're too selfish with this love of yours to consider what consequences your decision might have on the rest of the church. This is not simply about you and your feelings for one woman. The greater good of the church must be considered.”

“The greater good of the church, you say. And the church is the Bride of Christ. So what is the greatest good for the Bride?”

“You're twisting my words to suit your own means! The Bride is not this one woman. The Bride is the church, millions strong. It is she you must consider.”

“Love for the masses outweighs love for the few, is that it? Then let me suggest that God would quickly choose the true love—the unbridled, passionate love—of one soul over the acknowledgment of his deity from a hundred million churchgoing souls!”

“You demean the church?” Roald challenged.

“No, Roald,
you
demean the church. You mock the Bride. You undermine the value of love. The universe was created in the hopes of distilling a portion of genuine love. And now you suggest ignoring such love in favor of creating a moving picture for a profit. Nothing will ever compare to love, brother. Not all the devices man's mind can conceive, not a hundred thousand bulls slaughtered on the Day of Atonement. Nothing!”

Roald frowned. “And you have the spiritual pride to assume that you alone now possess God's love in your own heart? This love for an adulterous woman?”

“No, not me alone. But it's no different than God's love for an adulterous nation. For Israel. No different than his deep love for the church. His bride. You.”

The leader found nothing to say. For a moment Jan thought he might see the light. But after blinking a few times, Roald set his jaw and pushed his chair back. “This is crazy. I can't believe we're even thinking of throwing this away because of one . . . The way you speak smells of heresy.” He stood. “Well, Jan Jovic, I told you this once, but I'll tell you now for the last time. If the woman stays, then we go.” As if on cue Frank and Barney stood with Roald.

“We've had enough of this nonsense. I assume you called us here to ask for our support. And now you have our conditions. I only hope that God speaks some sense to your heart.”

“Yes, well you may pray for me, Roald. You do remember how to do that, don't you?”

Roald glared at Jan then huffed from the room with Frank and Barney.

Karen blew out some air and crossed her legs. “Well,
that
was quite a speech.”

“Perhaps I expressed myself too strongly.”

Betty spoke quietly. “I don't think so. I think you said what you needed to say. I've never heard such wonderful words.” Her kind eyes smiled, and Jan thought that asking for her attendance was perhaps the only part of the meeting that had come off as planned.

“Thank you, Betty. You're very kind.”

Karen grinned. “You certainly left no doubt as to where you stand. You're really going out on a limb this time, aren't you, Jan?”

He sighed and closed his eyes. What was happening?
Father, what have you done to me? You're stripping me of all you've given me.

And now Glenn was threatening worse. How had he managed this impossible turn of events? He pictured the heavy man standing with bloodied hands in his office just yesterday, and now seeing the man's twisted smile, fear lapped at Jan's mind. The man was capable of anything.

“Jan.”

He opened his eyes. Karen studied him. “You know on one level I can understand what you're doing.”

“Yes? What am I doing, Karen?
I
don't even know what I'm doing.”

“You're staying by the side of an unfaithful woman, that's what you're doing. And in staying by her side, you're throwing away the kind of life that most people can only dream about.”

“Maybe.” Jan looked at the chalkboard to their left. The figures of the new edition's intended distribution sprawled in white numbers, still vivid from the planning meeting during which they'd been drawn three weeks ago. “Or perhaps I've found the kind of love that most people only dream about. Anything less would be meaningless.”

“Perhaps. That's the level I can understand. I look at you, and I find it hard to believe that you actually love her that way. It tears me up, you know. That could have been me you were speaking about.” She shifted her gaze. “It's your sticking by her when she doesn't deserve you that I can't understand. That you love an unfaithful woman so much.”

It was the first time they had spoken so candidly of Helen. Betty's eyes shone with understanding. Jan looked at Karen. “I'm sorry, Karen. I didn't mean to hurt you. Please tell me you know that.”