When I’m With You (Indigo) (9 page)

“Marcel…”

“Caitlyn…”

They both attempted to speak at the same time. Marcel gestured for her to go first.

“I came for two reasons.” She felt that she would collapse from her buckling knees and bouncing stomach and looked toward the living room for a place to sit. From where she stood, the living room was breathtaking. The hand-carved wood-and-marble fireplace accented the open space and multiple windows offered an unimpeded view of the Oakland Hills.

“Do you mind if I sit down?”

“Not at all.” Marcel touched the small of her back and ushered her inside.

Caitlyn took a seat on one end of a long snow-white couch and placed her hand right at the top of her midsection, hoping it would calm the roller coaster in her stomach. She glanced around the room. “Your home is beautiful.”

“Thanks.” On the other end of the couch, Marcel bent forward and hooked his fingers together. “Has your car given you any more trouble?”

It took two attempts, but she eventually answered in a hoarse voice. “No. It’s running fine.”

“That’s good.” He rubbed sweaty palms up and down the sides of his thighs.

Caitlyn cleared her throat. “Well, you certainly made quite an impression on Fran.”

“How?”

“She wants you to serve on our board of directors.”

“I think that could be arranged.” He relaxed a bit and sat back with a muscled arm stretched across the back of the couch. His potent gaze was as gentle as a caress.

“Thank you for the offer to establish the co-op project.”

“Fran told you?”

“Yes.” She looked down at her hands, which shook like a leaf in the middle of a windstorm. “I found out at last night’s board meeting.” She glanced at him with a soft look in her eyes. “Thank you so much.”

“No. Thank you. If it hadn’t been for you, I never would have known about the youth center.”

Caitlyn nodded.

Marcel cleared his throat. “You said there were two reasons for your visit.”

She swallowed and opened her mouth to speak. Whatever she was about to say died on her lips the moment she spotted the car-shaped charm she’d given him hanging from a gold chain around his neck. “You kept it?”

He looked down at the charm and smiled. “Absolutely. Did you think I’d get rid of it?”

She shrugged. “I figured since we—”

“I’ve worn it since the day you gave it to me, and I don’t ever plan to take it off.”

She released an anxious chuckle. “It was a silly gift.”

“It’s the most precious gift anyone has ever given to me.”

She bowed her head at his words. “Marcel, I owe you an apology.” Slowly lifting her head, she looked over at him. “I took my inability to trust out on you, and for that I’m so, so sorry.” The tears she’d willed to stay hidden suddenly made their appearance. “It took the tongue-lashing of a good friend to help me understand that I’m just as guilty of the crime I accused you of. I was wrong, and I’m sorry.”

He scooted down the couch until he was next to her and laced their fingers together. “We’re both to blame, all right?” He lifted their hands to kiss the back of hers. “I’m willing to trust. What about you?”

“I’m willing to try.”

With his finger, he lifted her chin, brushing his lips across hers. “I’m sorry, kitten. And on my mother’s grave, I swear I’ll never do anything to hurt you again, and I’ll do whatever it takes to gain your trust.” With the pad of his thumb, he gently wiped away the wetness that still clung to her cheek. Between a kiss at each corner of her mouth, he whispered a request. “Will you let me earn your trust?”

She tilted her head back to look into his eyes.

“Will you at least try? That’s all I’m asking.”

“Yes,” she replied breathlessly.

He gathered her close. “Missed you, hellion.”

“Missed you, too.” She leaned back just a bit, not wanting to be too far away from his warm embrace. “The first step toward trust is sharing.” Releasing a hard breath, she turned to stare at the wall. “Remember the night in your car when you asked me how he hurt me?”

He nodded. “Yes.”

“Well, I think now it’s time you knew.”

“All right.”

“Four years ago, I met a man who on the surface seemed nice, but in the end, he made my life a living hell.”

Marcel frowned. “How?”

“He started out being charming, attentive, showing me all the attention a woman dreams about. I think some of my vulnerability to him was because I’d grown up in foster care and didn’t have a family of my own. Two months later, things changed.”

“How?”

“He became controlling and obsessive.”

“I don’t understand what you mean.”

“He would call my job at least twenty times a day. He wanted an account of my whereabouts every minute. It became real clear that it wasn’t going to work. I knew he wasn’t going to change, so I called it quits.” With the back of her hand, she wiped at another tear that had fallen. “But he refused to accept that it was over.”

“What happened after that?”

She released a long sigh. “The phone calls increased, and he started showing up at my job. When I would come home, he’d be parked outside. It seemed everywhere I went, he was there. He stalked me. Besides my foster mother, Ms. Ruby, I didn’t have a lot of close ties in New Jersey, so I decided to relocate.”

“To where?”

“I asked for a job transfer and moved to Atlanta, but he tracked me down.”

Wrinkles appeared on Marcel’s forehead. “Tracked you down? How?”

Caitlyn nodded. “He hired a private detective. The mistake I made was using my credit cards, opening a bank account—anything in my name.” She squared her shoulders and continued. “Anyway, I came home one night, and there he was waiting for me inside my condo.” The painful memories caused her to jerk, and her breathing became heavy.

“Caitlyn, baby, don’t shut down on me now.”

She sat rigid. Her brain still processed information, but her mouth refused to cooperate with the output. She stared blankly at the wall in front of her.

“Caitlyn, come on. Baby, you’ve got to trust me.”

She turned her tear-stained face to him and saw the distress in his eyes. “H-he…”

“Talk to me, cat eyes.” Marcel pulled her against his chest and spoke over the top of her head. “We’ll deal with whatever it is, together.” He leaned back to see her face. “But I can’t help you if you won’t trust me. Understand?”

“Yes.” Her voice was a whisper and she brushed away another tear.

“Wait right here.” Marcel made a mad dash and brought back a box of tissue. He knelt in front of her. Pulling out several tissues, he placed them in her hands, then took one and began wiping the tears that fell at a steady pace.

Still shaking, Caitlyn blew out a long, hard breath, and her voice trembled. “That night…” She lowered her head.

Lifting her face up, he softly asked, “What happened that night, baby?”

“He…raped me.”

Marcel’s body went rigid. Emotions swirled through him so swiftly he stopped breathing for a split second. He swayed from side to side as he rose to his feet. Shock, sadness, and rage ripped through him simultaneously.

“Baby, I’m so sorry…I didn’t know.” He sat next to her. “We don’t have to talk about this.” He glanced over and saw her shake her head. Reaching over, he clasped her trembling hands within his steady ones, silently communicating that continuing the conversation was her call.

Lines formed around Caitlyn’s full-lipped mouth, and she squeezed harder. “You know, it’s funny, but it’s still hard for people to believe that someone you’re involved with can rape you.” She then turned to him. “But it happens. And it happened to me over and over until the next morning.” With her free hand, she swiped at her tears. Her voice was hoarse and barely audible. “No means no. And if a man doesn’t accept that, then it’s rape as far as I’m concerned. Anyway, he forced me back to New Jersey. I let him think that I believed him when he said it would never happen again. The only thing I wanted was out. I was no match against him physically, so I had to think of a way I could beat him.”

“What did you do?”

“I outsmarted him.”

Pain settled around Marcel’s heart. He felt pure contempt for the man who’d violated her. He couldn’t imagine any man forcing himself on a woman. As far as he was concerned, any man who would was the worst scum on earth. It took everything he had to keep his voice calm. “How did you do it?”

“It took me weeks, but little by little, I cashed out everything I had—my retirement plan, savings, stock, bonds, you name it. I packed only the things I needed and figured out an escape plan. I let things settle down for a while. One day, my opportunity came when he went out of town on a family emergency—his sister was in a car accident. I left that day, and I’ve never looked back.”

“Didn’t you have friends, anyone who could help you?”

“At first, I didn’t want to bring any of them into that kind of drama because I would never have forgiven myself if he’d done anything to them. And trust me, I believe in my heart he was capable of it. I finally confided in Vic, and she was my saving grace.” A half chuckle escaped. “I don’t even own a cell phone. I didn’t want to take the chance of him tracking me down again.”

“Where’d you go?”

“Everywhere, anywhere. I never stayed in any place too long.”

“But you said Vic helped you, right?”

She nodded. “She did.”

He shook his head in confusion. “How? Why didn’t you just come here in the first place?”

“That’s what he would have expected. Vic is one of the main reasons he hasn’t found me to this day.”

Marcel shook his head again. “I don’t understand.”

“For the first year he would call her to see if she knew where I was. Of course, she’d always say she didn’t know and would tell him she heard I was staying with a friend here or there. Vic quarterbacked everything with our friends, especially Tara and Chandler. So, when he’d go to check it out, they would send him in another direction.”

“In other words, you guys had him going in circles.”

“Yes, and thank God, it worked. It gave me just a little more time to put more distance between us.”

Marcel continued to hold her hand and tried to ease the tightness in his fingers and the anger that raged inside him. “I’m so sorry, baby.”

Caitlyn’s breathing changed, and her voice thickened. “Through it all, I made it. But it left me just a tad short on trusting men.”

Marcel had always believed negotiation was the best way to settle a dispute. But he knew if he could get his hands on the man who’d raped Caitlyn, screw negotiation. The bastard would be dead. “Who did this to you, baby?”

She lowered her head and shook it.

“What’s his name?”

“Marcel, please, I don’t want you anywhere near—”

“I can find out, you know.”

“Please, just leave it be.”

“Why?” He half shouted and rose to his feet. “Some low-life asshole who calls himself a man brutalizes the hell out of you, turns your life upside down, makes you leave everything you’ve worked for, and you want me to leave it be. Hell no.” He stalked off to the other side of the room.

Caitlyn followed and placed her hands on his arm. “Baby, don’t you see? If you find him, go after him for any reason, he finds me.” She cupped his face. “Leave it be. Please.”

Her endearment warmed his heart because she’d never referred to him as “baby” before. He nodded begrudgingly. “All right, I see your point. I give you my word I won’t go after the son-of-a-bitch.” Then he paused. “What’d you say his name was again?”

She took in a deep breath and slowly released it. “I didn’t.”

He knew she was upset, but she was smart, too. She wasn’t so distressed that she didn’t pick up on his back door way of finding out the information he wanted. He gathered her in his embrace and held her, placing a kiss on the top of her head. “Thank you.”

With the fear of the past no longer a threat, she placed her head against his chest and listened to the steady beat of his heart. “For what?”

“For trusting me.”

It was a long time before either said a word. Finally, he broke the silence and placed his hand on her stomach. “Had dinner yet?”

* * *

Caitlyn didn’t expect the kitchen’s décor to be as elegant as that of the living room she’d walked out of. A crystal chandelier illuminated the parquet-top table that could easily seat six. The mahogany cabinets had clear glass inserts and showcased an array of glassware, china and sterling silver.

After washing her hands, Caitlyn stood at the oversized island next to Marcel. “So, what do you need me to do?”

Marcel nodded toward the refrigerator. “How about tackling the salad? You should find everything you need on the second shelf.”

“Got it.”

“Are you allergic to seafood?”

“No.” With everything for the salad piled in her arms, Caitlyn shut the refrigerator door with her foot. She glanced at the pot on the stove from which a mouth-watering aroma was coming. “Does it have shrimp in it?”