Where My Heart Belongs (30 page)
Kathy began to cry. “Oh, Sunny, I don’t hate you. I can’t believe you’d do something so generous. Worrying about this farm was eating me up inside. I hadn’t wanted Dad to fret over it, because he knew we should have put it on the market last year. I didn’t want you to worry about it, because I wanted to be . . . the strong one. This was such an act of love. How could I ever hate you for that?”
They embraced and held each other for several minutes. Tears streamed down Sunny’s face. She didn’t know what would happen in the future, but she knew it would take a great deal to match the importance of this moment.
Sunny heard someone step into the barn and pulled away from her sister to wipe her eyes. She didn’t want to be seen crying.
“I’m sorry,” Kathy said in an authoritative manner, “the barn is off limits for the sale. You’ll need to return to the auction.”
“I came here to see Sunny,” the man explained.
Sunny knew the voice immediately. She looked up, knowing the shock must have been written on her face.
He stepped forward, and with him came a rush of thoughts and feelings too overwhelming for Sunny to know what to say. She could only breathe one word.
“Brian.”
KATHY WATCHED THE COLOR PASS from Sunny’s face. Her sister looked as if she might faint. “Why don’t we go into the house?” Kathy suggested.
She took hold of Sunny’s arm in a possessive way. “Come on, Sunny.”
Sunny moved hesitantly, but Kathy pulled her along. “We don’t have much in the way of furniture, but there’s still a small table and chairs in the kitchen.” Kathy had long ago promised the set to Sylvia and was planning to take it to her at supper that evening. Everything else was packed in the trailer Kathy planned to pull.
It felt strange to have her brother-in-law show up. She stole a quick glance at him. He was quite handsome. Sunny always did have a way with picking her guys. No doubt Mitch and Randy had been good-looking as well, but Brian almost had movie-star good looks. From his wavy blond hair to his broad shoulders and athletic build, the tall man seemed nearly perfect. She looked at her sister and back to Brian. They made a very handsome couple.
Kathy pushed Sunny through the open back door. “Sunny, why don’t you go wash your face and freshen up a bit.” She leaned close to her sister’s ear. “It might help you feel better. I’ll take care of Brian.”
Sunny met her sister’s gaze and nodded. “I’ll be right back.”
With Sunny gone, Kathy turned to Brian. “I’m Kathy, Sunny’s sister. Why don’t you have a seat and tell me what brings you here.”
Brian took a chair, looking around the stark room. “I . . . well . . . I came because of Sunny. My mother told me where she was.”
Kathy frowned. “I see. Well, you should know this day has been really hard on both of us. I hope you aren’t here to make it that much harder.”
“I promise you, that’s not the case.”
“Then why are you here?” Kathy tried not to sound accusing, but she worried about what this visit might mean to her sister.
“I need to talk to my wife,” he said rather defensively.
Kathy crossed her arms. “You aren’t going to berate her with more of that nonsense about cheating on you, are you?” Kathy was surprised to suddenly realize she completely believed Sunny’s story. Her sister would never have cheated on this man—of that she felt confident.
“So I take it she’s told you everything?” he asked in a manner that suggested embarrassment.
“Yes. Or at least enough.”
“You must have a pretty bad opinion of me.” He met her gaze in an almost pleading manner.
It was easy to see he felt terrible, and Kathy didn’t know what to think. Sunny came back from the bathroom looking a little better—at least not quite so pale.
“I have things to do. You two feel free to talk here. No one should bother you.” Kathy turned to Sunny. “Unless you need me to stay?”
“No, I’ll . . . be . . . all right.” She drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Thanks.”
Kathy casually walked from the room in no hurry to leave. She actually hoped she might hear some of the conversation between the couple, but no one was talking. Reaching the front porch, Kathy paused to whisper a prayer.
Lord, Sunny needs you—maybe more than ever. Brian needs
you too. I don’t know what you have planned for this family, but
I know you hate divorce and lies. Please help us, Lord, to get
beyond both
.
Sunny tightly gripped the back of the kitchen chair. She had told herself over and over in the bathroom that she could handle this situation, but now that she was face-to-face with him, Sunny was certain she could not. Tears came to her eyes and rational thought fled. When she looked at Brian, she saw nothing but the loss. The loss of her marriage—her happiness—Lucy. It was more than she could bear. She lowered her head and began to cry in earnest, even knowing it would probably irritate him to no end.
Brian didn’t rebuke her for her tears. Instead, she heard him get out of his chair. For a moment Sunny feared he would leave, but she had no power to stop him. She could barely breathe for the tightness in her chest.
Without warning, Brian pulled her to him, turning her gently so that she could put her face on his chest. “Sunny, I was wrong.”
The words poured over her like a refreshing rain. It was all that she had hoped for, but she couldn’t bring herself to believe it might actually happen. She pulled away to look into his eyes.
He took her face in his hands. “I was wrong. I was so very wrong. I know you didn’t have an affair. I know I should have spent more time with you and Lucy. I failed you in so many ways. Sunny, please forgive me.”
“I can’t believe this is happening. What changed?”
He wiped her damp cheeks with his thumbs. “I did. I finally saw how stupid I’d acted. Just tell me I’m not too late.”
“Of course you aren’t.” Sunny felt her tears come anew. “I want to hear what happened.”
Brian let her go. “I guess the most important thing I did was learn the truth. I was working late one evening and happened to overhear a call. Remember Anita?”
Sunny nodded. “I do.”
“Well, she’d been telling me for months that you and Rick were an item.” He held up his hands. “I can’t believe I fell for her lurid tales. I knew better. I knew you loved me, and I knew that you wanted me at home. Anita suggested that you and Rick were in league to destroy me. She told me Rick wanted to take over my practice and with you and him both pressuring me to give up patients, I figured that was the truth of it.”
“I’m sorry. I never thought of it that way.” She motioned to the table. “Let’s sit.”
Brian nodded and held out her chair. Once they were both seated he continued. “Anita told me that you and Rick were having an affair, and that I should even question whether Lucy was mine. I had confided in her about wanting more children and how you didn’t want to have another baby yet. She told me that was because Lucy was Rick’s child and you only wanted his children.”
“That’s awful. And why would she say that? I mean, I know she was jealous of me, but still, she would have to know that Lucy’s paternity could be tested.”
“Sunny, I’m so ashamed to say this, but I had her tested.”
“Oh, Brian.”
“I was so crazy over the whole thing. I finally just felt like I was losing my mind. I wanted to talk to you, but you were gone. Mom didn’t know where you’d gone, and Lana knew but wouldn’t say. Mom finally sat me down and started talking to me about the past. She told me things about my father that I’d never understood. She told me things about her as well. She started talking about her faith in God and how everything had changed the day she’d realized she couldn’t cope with life on her own—the day she turned to Jesus.”
Sunny sat motionless, hardly able to believe Brian would be receptive to such a message. At least not the old Brian.
The old Brian would never have admitted he was wrong either
.
“Mom told me she knew I was miserable because I really loved you and knew I’d falsely accused you. But more than that, she knew I was miserable because I needed to find God for myself.”
“I had to find Him too,” Sunny offered.
Brian reached out and took hold of her hand. “I didn’t want to hear any of it at first. I felt like it made no more sense than the rest of my life. I asked Mom to take care of Lucy for a while, because I honestly felt I couldn’t be anything she needed me to be. The weeks dragged on, and I felt my misery grow even more acute. I knew something had to give. I even thought about suicide.”
“No!” Sunny gasped and gripped his hand more tightly. “I couldn’t bear that.”
“I just couldn’t see any hope—any light. When I really felt most desperate, I called Mom and she called her pastor. He came over to see me.”
“Pastor James?”
He nodded and smiled. “The very one. He didn’t cut me any slack. I figured he’d give me all sorts of sympathy and compassion, and instead he asked me point blank if I wanted things to be right. Not better. Right.”
“I know. He asked me the same thing.”
“I told him things were so wrong they could only go right. He told me I was wrong—that they could get much worse. I think that scared me more than anything.”
Brian let go of her hand and leaned back in the chair. “I met with him faithfully for two weeks, every day. He never once babied me along. He was firm, spoke the truth, and listened to me, but he wouldn’t allow me to wallow in self-pity.” He paused a moment. “I heard that your mom and dad are dead. I’m really sorry that I wasn’t here for you.”
“As hard as it was to lose them, it was nothing compared to losing you and Lucy. Oh, Brian, how is she? I miss her so much.”
“She’s doing pretty well, but she misses you. She won’t stop talking about you. I left her with Mom, because . . . well, I wasn’t sure you’d even see me.”
“Of course I’d see you. You were the one who wouldn’t deal with me, remember?” she asked in a teasing tone. She suddenly felt that no matter what else they discussed, everything was going to be all right. The peace that rushed over her was like no comfort she’d ever known.
“I stopped the divorce, Sunny.”
“You did?”
“I don’t want a divorce. I don’t want to lose you.”
“What do you want?” She hesitated to ask the question, but knew she needed the answer. If Brian wanted life to go on as it had, they would still have a lot of difficulties to overcome.
“I want everything to change. I think we should even leave Beverly Hills.”
“Truly? Where would we go?” Sunny had never considered that he might be willing to move. Of course, she’d never considered that Brian might admit his mistakes and come looking for her. She felt even more of the burden lift.
“I don’t know. It doesn’t matter so long as we could all be a family. You know there’s no problem with the money. I figure we could just start over. I could even take a month off so we can work on our family.”
“It sounds too good to be true.” Sunny got up from the table. Her nervous energy wouldn’t allow her to sit any longer. “I’ve prayed so much for this. I knew God could do it, but I wasn’t convinced He would.”
Brian got up and came around the table to where Sunny stood. “The way your sister stood guard over me, I wasn’t sure she would allow for anything more than my departure.”
Sunny laughed. “We’ve been through a lot this summer. She was so angry with me. She had given me up for dead and yet there I was demanding to be recognized.”
“She seemed very protective of you a few minutes ago.”
“We’ve just now started to work through things.”
“I didn’t expect to see the auction taking place,” he told her. “What’s going on?”
“Kathy is moving to Colorado Springs, where she hopes to pick up with her life. The guy she gave up twelve years ago is still waiting for her.”
“Wow. That’s pretty incredible. It must be true love.”
Sunny thought of her sister and Kyle. “I believe it is. He’s built his career all these years while waiting for her.”
“What does he do in Colorado Springs?”
“Works for a pharmaceutical company. I’m not sure what all he does for them. My uncle was involved in research there. Anyway, we’re selling off everything that we didn’t want to keep, because it’s time Kathy got her inheritance. She closes on the farm tomorrow and then we were heading out.”
“You were going to Colorado Springs too?”
“Just for a night or two. My aunt and uncle live there and had invited me.”
“Then what had you planned to do?”
Sunny looked up into her husband’s eyes. “I didn’t know. I knew I had to see Lucy, so I figured to come back to Los Angeles. After that, I didn’t really have any hope.”
“I’m so sorry, babe. I know that was my fault.” He reached out again to touch her face. “I’ve missed you so much. I’ve missed a great deal the last few years.”
“You have, but we can’t live in the past. It’s time to put it behind us and start fresh,” Sunny said.
“Then you’ll let me take you home?”
She smiled as warmth engulfed her heart. Home. That one single word held so much power. All of her life she’d looked for the sense of home, and it wasn’t until finding her way to God that she’d realized His was the only home that would last.
Stepping into her husband’s arms, Sunny sighed. “Yes. Please take me home. Take me where my heart belongs.”
Kathy stood on the back porch, crying. She had only returned a few minutes earlier, but the words she’d heard spoken kept her from turning to leave. Things were going to be all right for Sunny. Brian still loved her and she still loved him. Everything was as it should be.
Composing herself, Kathy sniffed back her tears and knocked lightly on the open kitchen door. Sunny and Brian pulled out of a passionate kiss that made Kathy embarrassed to have interrupted.
“We’re supposed to go to Sylvia’s for supper,” she said sheepishly. “I also need to take her the table and chairs.”
“Do you suppose she has room for one more?” Sunny asked. It was clear by the way she smiled that she knew Kathy comprehended the situation without explanation.