Whisky Melody: Rock Star Romance, New Adult College Romance (Tennessee Romance Book 2) (12 page)

Logan couldn’t stop the anger building inside him as he stared down at her sleeping face. He never planned to fall in love with anyone, but he was in love with this classical angel. Kaylee had worked his last nerve and turned them against each other in a way that had guaranteed things might never be right between them again, and that didn’t sit well with him when he’d inadvertently invested so much of himself, of his heart and his hopes, in Ashley.

Damn it, Kaylee.
He wanted her to be okay. He really did. He wanted her to live and come out of that coma safely, but he also wanted to cuss her out worse than he had ever cursed at anyone in his entire life. She knew the wealth of emotions and tangled issues between him and Charlie and Ashley were a powder keg, waiting to blow up. He didn’t doubt at all that she tried to use that to her advantage somehow, and he was sure her overdose was some sort of stunt, too
. If—No, when, she ever comes out of this, she needs to see a damn shrink,
he thought. He was sure Ashley would agree with him on that, but he wasn’t about to bring it up to her when they were on such thin ice already.

The whole thing made him feel like an asshole. He was angry with Kaylee and even Charlie, and he was angry about being angry with anyone. It was so confusing and screwed up that he couldn’t even think. “Hell, maybe I need a shrink, too,” he muttered.

Right then, he wanted nothing more than to curl up next to Ashley and hold her, but she hadn’t officially forgiven him. He didn’t feel worthy of her forgiveness then, and he wasn’t sure he could ever be. He knew how badly Brian, her ex, had treated her, and now he’d gone out of his way to prove to her that she couldn’t trust him, either. He was sure there had to be a way to fix it all. He just didn’t know what it was.

He also had to keep reminding himself that she’d quit the band. Ashley’s scholarship was far more important to her than Whisky Lullaby was to him. It wasn’t just because she wanted her degree. Much like Logan, Ashley wanted to live her passion, to make her living doing what she loved. She thrived on playing her cello in a classical setting, and he knew there would always be part of her that would not be satisfied rocking on the stage with his band. The love of his life loved the way music worked. She loved the math behind it, the finite possibilities that stretched until they snapped open to even more harmonic, melodious possibilities. For Ashley, music was far more about the head than it was about head-banging. She was a self-admitted music nerd, and she needed that education; it fed her.

He knew he was asking too much to ask her to give any part of it up. Logan had been pushing her and all of his friends hard for weeks.
And for what? Two new songs?
He’d been such a perfectionist, so intent on making sure those songs were absolutely flawless, that he had drained the joy right out of them. That was the thing with Ashley. Music brought her joy, and he’d lost the joy of it because he’d gotten too worried about making it perfect to keep on making it at all.

He pressed a kiss into her forehead. “I’m sorry, Ashley. I’ll set things right. I swear I will,” he vowed in a whisper, then turned out the light and left the room.

Ashley woke up several hours later. She sat up, looking around the dark bedroom. Her bones ached, and she blinked and stretched, wondering—and secretly hoping—that the whole thing had been nothing more than a nightmare.

Her ringing phone and her Uncle Pete’s number on her caller ID jolted her back to reality. She shivered and pulled the covers back over her body, then answered hesitatingly, certain that it had to be bad news. “Hello?” she said, with a quiver in her voice.

“Hey there, Ash. She’s…”

The pause dragged on so long that Ashley’s throat locked down on a scream.
Breathe
…. That refrain started up again, kicking along her brain like a mantra.
Breathe. In…out… Pull air into your lungs. Feel them rise and drop. Open your mouth. Breathe, damn it!

“It’s not good. She’s awake, sort of, and she’s… Well, they think she will survive this, but she’s not out of the woods, as they say. She had a heart attack, albeit a very small one. Apparently she has some sort of heart condition none of us knew about—a murmur, the doctor called it. She’s been drinking a lot, which I’m sure you already now, but that only makes the defect worse. The drugs…” Then, just like that, his voice ended on a harsh burst of breath.

“Yeah?” Ashley said, urging him on.

“She won’t be the same, Ashley, at least not physically. They think she’ll recover mentally, but she’s gonna need a lot of help. She’s…” He paused again, letting out an audible gulp. “Damn it! How did this happen? How did she screw up so badly?”

“I don’t know,” Ashley said, moving her hand to her forehead and massaging her throbbing temples. “I really don’t know, Uncle Pete.”

“Where were you, Ash? I mean, weren’t you with her?”

Great. Now he’s blaming me, too,
she silently seethed
.
“I was going to classes, playing in a band, and trying to keep her sober while also letting her live her own life and staying out of her way. Things weren’t…good between us, Uncle Pete. She wasn’t happy with me because… Well, I beat up her boyfriend.”

An incredulous laugh came through the phone. “You what? Why?”

Ashley decided then and there that she was tired of covering for her cousin, and it was time to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. “He tried to assault me, claiming I gave him mixed signals. It doesn’t help that I’m dating his brother. Charlie actually broke up with her yesterday, and she went to my boyfriend and told him I’ve been sleeping with Charlie. That’s the last in a long line of stuff she’s done to me lately. Please don’t ask me where I was or why I wasn’t with her. None of this is my fault. I did my best, but…” She paused, and her lower lip jutted out. “I tried and I got angry at her!” she finally spat, blowing up like a pressure cooker left on the burner too long. “I tried to help her, but she wouldn’t listen to me. Where were
you
?”

Pete’s sigh was loud. “I don’t mean to come down on you, Ashley, and neither does Melinda. It’s just…hard. She’s our only child, and—”

“That’s just it. She’s not a child. She’s a grownup, but she sure as heck doesn’t act like it, because no one’s ever made her.” Never mind that they had spoiled her rotten and let her get away with far too much. Never mind that she was known for screwing up and then running to her dear old dad to get her out of trouble. She almost mentioned that but thought it was best to keep it to herself.

“I know,” he said, with a tinge of guilt in his voice.

“You said she won’t be okay physically, that she’ll need help. What’s wrong?”

“With that heart murmur, she’ll have to be very careful for the rest of her life. She did a little damage to her liver, too, but they say it will heal in time, as long as she stays off drugs and alcohol.”

She licked her dry lips and asked, “Do they know yet what she took?”

“Well, if I didn’t know her any better, I’d think she tried to…” his voice trailed off, unable to finish that statement.

Ashley cleared her throat and said. “Oh. What happens now?”

“I’m taking her home. She’s coming back with us. Going to get some help. A lot of help. Look, about the dorm room…”

“You need me to move out, right?”

“I’m sorry, Ash, but surely you understand. I can’t justify paying that kind of money while Kaylee isn’t there.”

“No apologies are necessary, Uncle Pete. I get it. I’d never expect you to do that,” she said, even though her heart was sinking further the longer their conversation carried on. Homelessness was just what she needed, on top of everything else. “I can talk to the advisors and figure something out.”

“You don’t mind?”

Hell, yes, she minded. It was just a very rotten cherry on top of a spoiled sundae, but there was nothing she could say to change it. Life just sometimes worked out that way. When life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. “No, it’s fine,” she said.

“Okay. Well, it’s paid for till the end of the month, so no rush.”

No rush?
She wanted to bang her head on the wall or smash her cello over his. Everything was rushing by too fast, spinning out of reach, and she didn’t know what to do. “Okay,” she said dismissively, sick and tired of lying and telling everyone that.

After she hung up with her uncle, she picked up her cello case, opened it, and looked at the dormant strings. As much as music usually lingered in her heart, this time she couldn’t summon one single note.

Logan’s day seemed to get worse, and he was shocked that was even possible. “Screw you and your dumb law, Murphy!” he raged as he read a text from his bass player, informing him that he was quitting the band. It was the day before Royale, and he was down two band members. His only option was to sing solo, but he would have to change some of the lyrics for that to make any sense at all. He was still upset Ashley had quit the band, but, as long as she didn’t quit him, he could live with that. Whatever she decided to do was fine with him, as long as he was part of her life.

As for bass players, though, that was another problem entirely. He had no choice, so he plodded across the campus like a pouting toddler, hit the button to speed dial Charlie, then waited for him to answer. “I need you and your bass,” he said as soon as Charlie answered on the third ring, without even bothering with a hello.

“Say what?”

“Our bass player quit, Ashley quit, and, oh…Kaylee’s in the hospital.”

“Whoa, man! Slow down. Where are you?”

“Walking. I just…needed to think.”

“Okay. Meet me at Billy’s in ten.”

“What are you doing at Billy’s?”

Charlie snorted. “Washing dishes, dude.”

Logan blinked. “Huh?”

“I’m working, yo. I needed money, and they needed some asshole to scrub the pizza pans. A real win-freaking-win, right? Anyway, I get off in a few minutes, so just meet me over here…and don’t say shit about the tomato sauce in my damn hair.”

Logan managed a slight chuckle at the visual of that. “Okay. Will do. Why didn’t you tell me you took a job?”

“It’s no big deal.” Charlie said. “It wasn’t like I was doing anything else really.”

Logan blew out air from what felt like the bottom of his lungs. So many things had escaped him lately, as if the whole world had gone on without him in it. He’d been so tied up in his relationship with Ashley and his preparation for Royale, but even that didn’t fully explain it. School kept him busy, and he frequently ran on nothing more than coffee and nerves, but that was the state half the kids on campus lived in. Somehow, amidst it all, he’d just checked out, and he didn’t even remember when that happened.

“Okay. Well, I’m heading over now.” He hung up and kept walking, dragging his feet a little as he went. He thought it might be better to just call the whole thing off, to duck out of the band competition altogether. Things were spinning so far out of control, and it was beginning to feel like he was working too hard and getting nowhere.

Charlie was outside, leaning against the building, and he gave his stepbrother a long, concerned look. “You hungry, bro?”

Logan shook his head. “No. I ate a bit ago.”

“Cool. If you don’t want a beer or anything, let’s just go. I can’t even stand the smell of that place after bein’ stuck in that greasy-ass kitchen for a couple hours.”

Logan rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “Yeah, let’s just walk. Like I said, I need to think.”

“Think, huh? About what? What’s up?” Charlie asked as they set off toward the campus.

Logan watched their shadows run away below them. “Let’s see. Yesterday, I got in a huge fight with Ashley because Kaylee came over and told me you were fucking Ash.” He held his hand up to stop Charlie from interrupting. “I know. I was still pissed. I’m an idiot, because she has a fucking ex who thought he was all that and hitting women was okay.” He shook his head. “I just got…too loud and pushy, so she quit the band.”

“Seriously?”

Logan quit walking. “Why were you over there, at her dorm?”

Charlie stopped and looked at her. “I asked her to ask you to let me back in the band. That’s all it was, Logan. I swear.”

Logan lifted an eyebrow. “And you couldn’t ask me yourself?”

Charlie shrugged. “I was embarrassed. I mean, c’mon! She didn’t tell you?”

“No. Ashley just said she’s tired of being everybody’s go-between.”

“Yeah, she told me the same thing when I asked her for help with you and even with Kaylee. By the way, I knew you were about to be short a bass player. I wanted to squeeze in before you found somebody else.”

Logan eyed him. “For real? You want back in?”

Charlie nodded. “I do. I just… Oh, hell. It’s where I feel like I matter, as emo as that sounds.”

“I get that. I feel the very same way.”

Charlie started walking again. “How’s Kaylee?”

“You don’t sound surprised.”

Charlie snorted. “I’m not. Lots of people are talking about some bad molly that’s making the rounds. As much of that shit as she took, I knew it was just a matter of time before she got hold of a bad batch. Everyone warned her to chill with it, but she didn’t listen. I’m sorry she brought her drama to your door, though. I didn’t think she’d run over and tattle to you that I was with Ashley in her room—or maybe I did, and I figured you’d try to beat my ass, figuring I had done something crazy again.”

“You better never—”

“No worries, man. I think Ashley and I have come to some kind of agreement, if not a truce.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah—not to mention I’m kinda scared of her.” Charlie’s lip lifted in a grin. “Like…really scared.”

“I can’t say I blame you. She kind of scared me that night, too.”

They burst into laughter, the good kind, and they both felt better for it.

“So? Am I in?”

“Yeah, I guess,” Logan said, then grinned at Charlie as they headed into the dorm. The first bit of good to come out of today. That, and seeing Ashley. Damn, he loved that girl. “And you’d better be
all
in this time.”