Wicked Reunion (Wicked White Series Book 2) (17 page)

Jared bites his lip as I reach between us, eager to touch and explore his beautiful body. His flesh is warm and silky as I wrap my fingers around his shaft and guide it to my entrance.

“Shit,” he murmurs as he licks his lips, and then he brings his face back up so he can stare at me with his lust-coated eyes. He reaches out and flicks his thumb over my still-erect nipple.

I bite my lip as I inch closer to the edge of the counter, guiding his cock up and down my folds, making impact with my clit each time.

Jared sucks a quick breath through his teeth. “Jesus. You’re so fucking wet.”

He crushes his mouth to mine as he thrusts his hips forward, and just the tip of his cock slides inside me. I spread my legs wider and grab his ass in both of my hands. “I want you inside me.”

He trails his nose along my jawline. “You don’t know how bad I want to fuck you. I’ve thought about you for so long. I know once I’m inside of you that I won’t last. I want you too damn much.”

“Please,” I beg. “Make me feel good,” I whisper against his lips.

As soon as the words fall from my lips, he thrusts his cock inside me, and I clench down around him.

“Fuck,” he breathes, moving at a deliciously slow pace. He drops his head and rests his forehead on my shoulder. “You—God, you’re amazing. I don’t want this to end.”

“Oh, you feel so good,” I tell him as he moves a little faster. “Harder,” I tell him, feeling a little greedy as I seek out another orgasm.

He snakes his arms under mine and splays his hands on my back as he does exactly as I ask.

“Yes,”
I hiss.

That familiar tingle erupts throughout my body as he drives himself inside me.

I pant, and my mouth drifts open as I come again. “Oh, God. Jared, yes!”

“Come for me, baby. You’re so fucking sexy,” he growls as I come undone under him.

He thrusts into me a few more times before he curses and comes inside me. He stills and then pulls out, rubbing his come-covered cock over my folds.

He bites his bottom lip. “I’m sorry about that. I should’ve used a condom, but I was so caught up. I want you to know that I’m clean, I get tested regularly. You’re still on the pill, right?”

I shake my head. I should’ve stopped him, but my stupid body just doesn’t know how to say no when it comes to this man.

Jared sighs and then jams his fingers into his hair. “If something happens, we’ll handle it, okay? I promise you can count on me now.”

I pull back and stare into his blue eyes. “Jared . . .” I say his name almost like a whisper.

He furrows his brow. “I know that look, London. What’s wrong?”

I open my mouth to answer him, but a wave of nausea hits me hard, and I twist just in time to vomit into the kitchen sink.

“Oh my God. London? Are you all right?” There’s thick concern in Jared’s voice as he stands behind me and holds my hair back while I continue to expel my lunch. “Why didn’t you tell me you weren’t feeling well?”

I shake my head. “I didn’t feel sick until just a few seconds ago. It was like I just got off of an amusement park ride and the world was still spinning.”

“So you’re saying I just rocked your world?” I can hear the teasing in his voice, and I reach behind me to smack him. “Ouch. Kidding. Only kidding.”

I turn the faucet on and rinse the contents in the sink down the drain and then cup my hand to fill it with water to wash my mouth out. When I stand up, Jared watches me closely, like I’m a puking time bomb that’s ready to erupt again at any second.

He hands me a paper towel. “You okay?”

I take it and wipe my face. “Yeah. I’m okay.”

“Does that happen often, or is it just sex with me that makes you ill?”

I roll my eyes. “I’m not sure what happened. I was fine before and during. It was . . . I don’t know.”

Jared’s lips twist. “Maybe you should go to Dr. Friedman and get it checked out.”

I nod. “Maybe I will.”

Jared bites his lip. “I’ll go with you, if you want. His office had the best suckers.”

I laugh, finding it amusing that he remembers that about the family doctor both he and I have gone to since we were in junior high school. “I think I can handle going to the doctor on my own, but I’ll be sure to tell him how big of a fan you are of his treats.”

The next day I sit in the waiting room of my family doctor as I listen for my name to be called. I’ve felt sick for the last month, but I chalked it up to being stressed over the separation in my marriage. Puking for no apparent reason is definitely a new thing.

Jared showing up two days ago has made things worse. Being caught between two men has magnified my stress levels tenfold. I’ve decided it’s time to get checked and get a prescription for nerve pills if that’s what I need. After I left Jared yesterday, I couldn’t stop replaying what occurred between us in that kitchen. I’m not sure where we go from here. I would love nothing more than to try and start over with him. Jared and I need to sit down and figure out this thing between us.

“London Kraft,” the short, dark-haired nurse in blue scrubs calls from the doorway.

I toss the magazine I was reading back down on the table in front of me and push up out of the chair. “That’s me.”

I follow her down the hallway. After she asks me why I’m here, she weighs me and takes my blood pressure, and then ushers me into a small exam room. “The doctor will be right in.”

Nearly twenty minutes later, Dr. Anthony Friedman comes waltzing in the door. Dr. Friedman always looks exactly the same every time I come in here. Hair combed over to the side and thick-framed glasses complement his white lab coat, completing the stereotypical nerdy appearance.

He sits down at the small desk in the room with what I assume is my chart in his hand. “So, London, my nurse says you’re not feeling well—some general tiredness and nausea. Is there anything else going on?”

“Those are the main things,” I tell him. “I’ve never felt so off before in my life.”

He glances down at the chart. “And you’ve been feeling this way for nearly a month?” I nod and he makes a note. “When was your last menstrual period?”

I furrow my brow as I try to remember. I’ve been so distracted lately that I can’t recall. “I’m not sure.”

Dr. Friedman’s eyes soften. “Let’s get a pregnancy test for you, and we’ll start from there.”

My stomach drops to the floor, and a wave of nausea rolls over me. Is this really happening to me right now? I rub my forehead and then close my eyes.

I guess it is possible that I might be pregnant. Wes and I didn’t use birth control—messing around with my hormones made me too weepy—but I did keep track of when I ovulate so that we could avoid sex around those times. We haven’t been married long enough to even entertain the idea of starting a family.

When Dr. Friedman leaves the room, the dark-haired nurse pokes her head back through the door. “London, if you’ll come with me over to the restroom.”

I follow her but am in full-on robot mode, just going through the motions. I chew the meaty flesh on the inside of my bottom lip, trying to hide the fact that my heart is beating a thousand miles a minute inside my chest as I try not to freak the fuck out until I know if I’m pregnant or not.

She opens the door to the restroom and hands me plastic cup that has my name on it. “Fill it up to the line and then open the little door on the wall and set it inside. Any questions?”

“No,” I whisper.

After I provide the sample, she sticks me back into the exam room, where I wait for what feels like forever for the doctor to come back in and give me the results.

Dr. Friedman sits back down at the little desk across from me. “Congratulations, you’re pregnant.”

My eyes widen, and I suck in a quick breath. “Are you sure?”

I clutch my chest at the realization of how this will affect getting back together with Jared. It can never happen now—not after this.

He nods. “Our tests are pretty accurate, but of course, we always do a full blood workup too. Since you can’t remember the date of your last menstrual period, there’s no way to know for sure exactly how far along you are. You’ll need to make an appointment with an OB to confirm the pregnancy, and if you need help finding one, let my staff in the front office know, and they can help you. In the meantime, I’m going to write you a one-month supply of prenatal vitamins and advise you to start eating healthy. Follow the basic food groups, limit your caffeine intake, and absolutely no alcohol. Any questions?”

My entire body is numb, and while I’m sure I’ll have a million questions later on, I can’t think of a single one right now. The only thing that’s on my mind is telling Jared.

I stare up at the doctor and do my best to fight back tears as I shake my head.

“I know this is a lot to take in, especially if you weren’t trying to get pregnant. Go home and talk about this with your partner, and I’m sure that will help.”

I walk out of that office completely stunned with a handful of pamphlets and my first OB appointment. The idea of a baby and having a family of my own is something I’ve always dreamed about, but I never planned on things happening like this. This isn’t the most opportune time to bring a life into this world, considering Wes and I are separated and I don’t see any way of fixing our marriage. What in the hell am I going to do? When Wes finds out about this baby, he’s going to fight like hell to make our marriage work.

When I reach my car, there’s only one person I can think of to speak with about this situation—the one person who I know I’m about to lose again.

NOW

LONDON

I
park in front of Julie’s house and take a deep breath, feeling thankful that Julie isn’t home for this conversation I’m about to have with her son. Of all the scenarios I’ve ever pictured in my head when I think about Jared, walking in to tell him that I’m pregnant with his brother’s baby isn’t one of them.

I hop out of the car and make my way up the sidewalk of the little blue house while dread creeps over me. I don’t know how I’m supposed to break this to him. Hell, I haven’t even fully processed this myself.

I knock on the door, and I hear movement on the other side. When Jared opens it, he grins and his beautiful blue eyes sparkle with excitement.

“London.” He says my name with what sounds like a relieved sigh as his strong, tattooed arms wrap around me. “I’ve missed you.”

I pull back and open my mouth but then quickly close it as tears stream down my face. Confusion washes over Jared’s face as he leads me into the house and closes the door behind us. I can tell that he’s concerned, but he doesn’t say anything for a long minute.

I stare up into his eyes, and suddenly I know it will kill me to tell him what I’ve just discovered.

When I try to turn away, Jared grabs my waist and halts me from leaving.

Jared bites his bottom lip as he cradles my face in his hands and I hold on to his back. “Tell me, please,” he begs. “Whatever it is—we’ll get through this. Let me be there for you.”

“I . . .” I pause as every nerve in my body begins to jitter. It’s so wrong of me to even entertain the idea of telling Jared about the baby before Wes knows, but I feel like he needs to know. He needs to know the reason that I can’t be with him and why this time it’s me walking out of his life forever.

If I thought telling him I married his brother was hard, telling him I am carrying his brother’s baby is going to gut me, but this is one secret that I can’t hide from him. “I’m pregnant.”

All of the muscles in his back tense under my fingers. He slowly pulls back. “That’s why you were sick yesterday?”

I nod. “Yes. I just came from the doctor. I thought it was stress and that I was just on the verge of having a mental breakdown with everything going on—the divorce, you—but that wasn’t the case. They did a urine test and told me that I wasn’t sick, just pregnant.”

He rakes his hand through his hair. “Does Wes know?”

I shake my head. “No, and I know as soon as he finds out, he’s going to push even harder for us to be together.”

“And you don’t want that?”

“No,” I whisper.

He licks his lips. “Then what do you want?”

You!
I want to scream out, but I know deep down that I can’t do that. It wouldn’t be right to do this to Wes. Even though Wes doesn’t own my heart, I know this baby will, and I’ll do whatever it takes to make him or her happy. “What I want is what’s best for this baby, and it’s going to need its father.”

He sighs and then brushes a strand of my dark hair off my cheek. “London . . .” He trails off, and I can tell there’s so much that he wants to say, but he stops himself. “I know how much a father means to a little kid.” He closes his eyes, and his Adam’s apple bobs when he swallows hard before he opens them again and stares into my eyes. He furrows his brow, and I can tell he’s doing his best to hide just how crushed he is by my decision. My heart aches for him, and more than anything, I wish I didn’t have to tell Jared good-bye. “As much as it hurts, I understand your choice. I love you and I love my brother. If you two want to work things out, then I’ll step back. I won’t stand in the way. I’ll leave again, but I want you to know that I’ll miss you every damn day for the rest of my life.”

“This kills me. I don’t want to end things like this,” I tell him as my heart crumbles in my chest. “I’ve always loved you.”

“But you love him too. I know you do or you wouldn’t have married him. He was there for you when I wasn’t.” Tears run down Jared’s cheeks. “Go tell him. You’ll feel a lot better once everything is out in the open.”

I nod, knowing that he’s right. It was not good of me to tell Jared about the baby before Wes even had a chance to know. I need to tell him. “I should probably go find him.”

Jared pulls me against him without apology and wraps his arms around me. “I love you, London. Forever.”

“I love you so much.” I cling to him, knowing this is probably the last time I’ll ever feel his arms wrapped around me. “I don’t want to let you go.”

He cups my face and then swallows hard. “Sometimes the thing you love the most in this world is the one thing that you’re destined to lose. I’ve come to learn in real life there are no happily ever afters.” Jared’s lips twist before he leans in and kisses my forehead.

I close my eyes and allow the tears I can no longer fight back to flow down my cheeks. I’ve been waiting for so long to have my Jared back—to feel his arms wrapped around me—and now that I finally have what I want, I have to set him free.

I pull away and dart out of the house, unable to stay with him one moment longer, because I know that if I stay locked in his embrace I’ll talk myself out of doing the right thing and being with Wes.

A sob tears out of me as I run down the sidewalk and find the safety of my car. I lay my head on the steering wheel and allow myself to grieve the loss of the man I love, because I know this time it’s really over.

After I’ve cried out every last tear, I pull out my cell phone and dial Wes’s work number.

“Hey. It’s me,” I say after Wes answers. “I’m calling to ask if you would come over to the house for dinner tonight.”

“Really? That would be amazing.” The excitement in his voice is clear, and I can tell he’s hopeful about what this invitation means. “What time?”

I force a smile on my face so that my voice doesn’t sound sad. “Let’s say six?”

“Sounds great. I’ll see you then. I love you, London,” he says.

“Love you too.” I force the words out, and my heart sinks because it isn’t ready for me to try and force it to love Wes.

This is the right thing to do. Wes is the father of my baby. He deserves a shot to be there for every moment in the child’s life.

Later that day, I put on a blue sundress that Wes always compliments, saying how beautiful I look when I wear it, and then busy myself with making dinner while I wait on Wes to show up. I keep rehearsing how I’m going to break the news to him, but nothing I come up with ever sounds right. I guess there’s not going to be any easy way to tell him any of this.

Wes doesn’t even bother using the doorbell tonight. Instead he uses his house key to let himself inside. “London?”

I dry my hands off on a dish towel after washing off a tomato for the salad. “In here.”

Wes walks in with his jacket in his hand while he loosens his tie. “Something smells good.”

“I made homemade chicken and noodles,” I tell him, knowing that’s one of his favorites.

“Really? Wow. That’s awesome. What’s the special occasion? You usually only make those on holidays or my birthday. What’s up?”

He’s already suspicious. If I tell him now, we’ll most likely end up in a fight and he won’t eat, and I don’t want to do that to him. “Sit. Let’s eat.”

I figure ignoring him the best I can is the right way to handle things for now.

I fix him a plate of food, carry it to the table, and set it down in front of him.

He tips his head forward and makes a show of taking a big whiff. “You are such an amazing cook.”

I laugh as I make my plate and then join him at the small table in our kitchen. “I learned it all from your mom.”

He grins. “I love that you’re close with Mom. You always hear horror stories about wives hating their in-laws. I’m glad we don’t have that problem.”

I give him a closed-mouth smile. It’s true, my mom would’ve probably loved Wes, but she would’ve loved Jared too. It would be nice to talk to her about both of them, because she could give me so much advice right now. It’s not like I can go to Julie and seek out advice on which of her sons I should be with. She loves both of her boys. She doesn’t want to see one of them hurt any more than I do.

The rest of the dinner we make small talk, and I listen intently as Wes tells me about a big project he’s working on for his firm. I’m proud that he’s accomplished so much since we’ve been out of school.

Wes downs the last bit of his drink and then focuses his attention directly on me. “Okay, now that we’re done eating, are you going to tell me why you asked me to come here? I’ve been on pins and needles wondering what it could be since you called earlier today.”

I chew on my bottom lip. “There are a couple things that I want to talk to you about.”

“I’m all ears,” he says.

I take a deep breath. “I’ve been feeling really sick over the last month, and I thought it was stress or maybe some sort of adult form of mono, but when I went to the doctor today, he told me it was something else.”

He raises his eyebrows. “What is it?”

There’s no simple way to say this, so I’m just going to blurt it out. “I’m pregnant.”

Wes’s jaw drops open for a split second before a huge grin overtakes his face. “A baby? I’m going to be a father? Oh, baby, that’s such wonderful news.” He reaches across the table and takes my hand. “This could be just what we need to get us back on track.”

I lift one eyebrow. “You aren’t upset that this has happened after all the plans we made to wait for a long while before we had kids?”

“I know we talked about that, but I just knew back when we first started having problems that maybe if we had a baby you’d be able to forget about my jackass brother and focus on the family you could have with me if you just got over him.”

His words cause me to trip up a bit, and I rub my forehead as I replay what he just said in my mind. Wes has wanted a baby all along? “Wes, a baby doesn’t save a marriage.”

“Sure they do. Look at us. We’re back to talking—working through things together.” Wes smiles, and then his cheeks flush a bit. “I could see us falling apart, London. I would’ve done anything to keep you in my life. I didn’t want to lose you to the ghost of my brother—a guy who I knew wasn’t worthy of your love.”

I flinch and shove myself away from the table before I pop right up out of my seat. “That’s not for you to decide. My heart loves who it loves.”

“London, come on. Don’t get angry. This is a great thing for us. Look at this dinner you made—the baby is already bringing us closer together. Don’t let the fact that Jared is in town for a little while mess with that, because, trust me, he’s not planning on sticking around. As soon as that Ace White guy is found, Wicked White will go back on tour, and Jared will be going with them.”

I furrow my brow. “Just because he leaves to go back out on the road doesn’t mean that we wouldn’t have been able to make a relationship work. We did it all the time when he was on the road playing baseball.”

“That was short trips.” Wes opens his mouth to say something else but just shakes his head instead and takes a deep breath. “London, I can’t believe after all this time you’re still sticking up for him. I’m so sick and tired of him always coming between us!”

I flinch at Wes’s tone, and before I have a chance to say anything else, Wes fires at me, “What the two of you had is over. That night we tracked him down and saw him in the backseat with some random barfly . . . that was just a small taste of what life with Jared would be like for you. He didn’t have the groupies back then like he does now. He’s a rock star, and they’re known for being wild and fucking everything that walks. Why would you want him back, knowing all that? I don’t understand why you just can’t let him go. He doesn’t love you like I do. Can’t you see that I would do anything for you?”

I open my mouth to argue that Jared has changed, but I know that it won’t do any good. All Wes thinks about is the past. He’s not willing to even give his brother the benefit of the doubt that he’s figured out how to cope with his emotions.

Jared left me once and put me—all of us—through a lot, but I know when he apologized that he was sincere. More than anything, I want Jared and me to have a second chance at being together, but for my baby’s sake, I can’t. Wes is the right choice. He’s safe, and he’s what this baby needs: a stable father.

Wes shoves his hand into his hair and grimaces. “God, London. I can’t believe you still love him after all he’s put you through. Maybe when he finds out that you’re carrying my baby, he’ll finally figure out that he’s lost. That you’re mine.”

I swallow hard as I stare into Wes’s wild brown eyes. “Jared already knows about the baby.”

“What? How the hell does he know?” Anger rings through his voice.

“I stopped by your mom’s and he was there and I . . . well, I told him.” I leave out all the details of our conversation—how I chose Wes over Jared because of the baby. There’s no need to add even more insult to injury.

Wes flares his nostrils and tosses his napkin on the table. “Motherfucker!” He stands up and grabs his coat. “That’s it. I’ve had it with him.
I’m going to go over and put a stop to him ever contacting you again. You’re
my
wife and”—he points to my belly—“that’s
my
baby in there.
Mine.
Not his—
mine
—and I’m going to make sure he knows it.”