Wicked Ugly Bad (A Kinda Fairytale) (11 page)

Jesus,
did
everyone
try to proposition the guy?  The corruption at the WUB Club
was sickening.  They were supposed to be helping to rehabilitate Marrok,
instead they were using their positions to exploit him.  Scarlett had spent
every day of her incarceration irritated at the wolf, but now she was starting
to see him a whole new light.  His amazing looks made him a victim in this
place.

And
even when he got outside, he wouldn’t be free.  Not if he went back to his old
life of playing Wolfball for the Eastlands.  The wolves were virtual slaves no
matter where they went, especially the ones who brought in money for their
teams.

Why
was there no place for them to go and be safe?

Marrok’s
gaze stayed on Scarlett, not even glancing Harriet’s way.  “I’m fine here.”  He
agreed simply.

The
nurse didn’t appreciate the rejection.  Her mouth thinned.  “Suit yourself.”  She
looked down at Benji’s half eaten necklace and scowled.  “Do we have to go through
this every other day?  Stop eating all our craft supplies, fatty!”

Benji
swallowed the skein of yarn he was chewing on.  “Sorry.”  He whispered.

Harriet
made a disgusted face.  “The next time I catch you, you’ll be spending craft time
in the library.”  She went marching off to another table to break-up a shouting
match over which looked prettier: penne or garganelli.

Marrok’s
jaw ticked.

Benji
looked down at the tabletop, close to tears.

“Well,
we could at least kill
her
, right?”  Avenant looked around the group
with new enthusiasm.  “Who was that pussy who robbed from the rich and gave to
the poor and everyone
praised
him for his thievery?  Well, ridding craft
time of that woman would be the same principle.  On the surface it’s a crime,
but it’s really for the greater good.  The only moral choice.”  He nodded
eagerly, agreeing with his own argument.  “Shall we vote on it?”

“I
vote yes.”  Esmeralda muttered.  “I hate that fucking bitch.”  She reached over
to pet Benji’s furry arm comfortingly.

Rumpelstiltskin
sat up straighter and scowled down at the yarn in his hand.  “Back home I could
spin this into gold and make
real
jewelry.”  He said randomly.

Scarlett
didn’t even hear them, her mind racing with a new idea.  The WUB Club was designed
to be a miserable hole, but the library was the very worst spot outside the
cells in the basement.  It was a dank, moldy, rarely used room full of decades
old magazines and “scientific” treatises that explained why Baddies were
genetically inferior.  Every single book in the place was a manifesto of hate
and Good folk superiority.

No
one went to the library.  Even crossing the threshold was a punishment.  And
its unbarred windows overlooked western side of the property.  All that lay
beyond the dirty glass was the vast Lake of Forgetting and the Enchanted Forest
on the opposite shore.

…The
endless, creepy, maze-like woods that could hide
anyone
.

Letty’s
eyes narrowed in deep consideration.  It might be possible to get outside the
hospital through the library windows.  From there, they could make it to the
lake… but the water was poisoned.  If even a single drop touched your skin, you’d
develop permanent amnesia.  You ended up just sitting down on the shore and
waiting for the guards to come and hustle you back inside, your entire life a complete
blank.

The
Lake of Forgetting worked even better than a wall, because it curved around the
entire side of the WUB Club.  Several hundred acres of black water, specially enspelled
to keep Baddies in.

But,
then, no Baddie had ever been quite as motivated as Scarlett was to get
out
. 
If she could cross the lake and get to the forest, not even the flying monkeys
could find her.

“Benji?” 
She looked over at him and smiled.  “Being a bridge ogre, I’ll bet you know a
lot about boats…”

***

“This
will never work.”  Rumpelstiltskin looked like he was about to hyperventilate. 
“We’re going to be gassed for sure.  This whole day has been a bad idea, but
this is just…”

“Shut-up.” 
Avenant ordered.  “We all know we’re doomed, but whining about it won’t help. 
Just quietly resign yourself to death.”

Scarlett
did her best to disregard the negativity.  “Benji, sweetie, you look fabulous. 
Don’t worry, at all.  I know that this is going to be fine.  I have total faith
in you.”

He
swallowed so hard his throat clicked.  “But, Letty…”

“The
key is to think ‘I can do this.  I can do this.  I can do this.’”  She pointed
at her temple.  “The power of positive thoughts can create positive action.”

“Oh
my God, you just quoted Dr. Ramona.”  Marrok shook his head.  “You really do need
to get out of here, Red.  Psychobabble rots the brain and you have such an
adorable
one.”

She
spared him an irritated look and he grinned at her.

It
was difficult to stay perpetually annoyed at the handsomest man in the Four
Kingdoms, but Marrok did his very best to make it possible.  Or at least he had
until today.  Suddenly, he was teasing instead of mocking; smiling at her like
he wanted her to smile back.  It was so much harder to hate him when he was
being playful.

She
really wished he’d stop it.

Considering
the fact people apparently preyed on his looks, she was doing her best not to
stare at him, but it was difficult when he was so damn gorgeous and flirty.

She
forced her eyes away from Marrok’s brilliant smile and focused on Benji, again. 
The poor guy was terrified, his body shaking in fear.  The whole plan would
fall apart if he couldn’t do his part.

“Benji,
I believe in you.”  She gripped his shoulders and tried to exude confidence. 
“When you walk out there, what are you going to think to yourself?”

“I
can do this?”  He guessed.

“Again.”

“I
can do this.”  He repeated in a slightly louder voice.

“One
more time.”

“I
can
do
this.”

“Yes,
you can!”  She gave him a helpful shove towards the door.  “Go get ‘em, tiger.”

“He
can’t do this.”  Avenant said sourly as Benji teetered towards the front
office.  “No way in hell will anyone believe he’s Ramona.”

The
disguise was a little harder to pull off with a bridge ogre than it had been
with Esmeralda and Scarlett.  Ez could give Benji Ramona’s size and shape, but
he was still a lumbering blue giant underneath the glamour.  He walked with a
heavy stride, there was no telling what he might blurt out in panic if he was
questioned, and he was nervously munching on a clipboard.

Still,
he could find them a boat.  Scarlett couldn’t think of another way to get them
all across the lake and, without crossing the lake, she had no idea how they
were going to escape.

Beside
her, Esmeralda watched Benji approach the security door that kept the prisoners
out of the WUB Club’s foyer.  The witch was now disguised at Benji.  At this
rate, poor Ez would have no idea what she was supposed to look like by the end
of the day.  “I hope I got everything right on his hair.”  She muttered to
herself.

Benji
clomped his way to the security door and swiped Ramona’s ID badge in front of
the lock.  He held Ramona’s keycard like it was trying to escape his grasp, his
fingers visibly trembling.

“You
can do it, Benji!”  Drusilla called loudly, still bleary from the drugs.

Scarlett
winced at her sister’s volume, as everyone else made desperate “Shhhh!” sounds.

Benji
cringed at the delirious support.  When the door buzzed open, he trooped out
into the front office, looking like he was headed for the gallows.  The dwarf
guard behind the check-in desk glanced up as “Ramona” passed by.  He gave a
disinterested nod in Benji’s direction and then went back to texting on his
phone.

That
was it.

No
sirens.  No interrogation.  No flying monkeys swooping down.

Benji
blinked like he couldn’t believe the disguise was actually working.  Still
braced for the other shoe to drop, he just stood there for moment, waiting to
get caught.  When no one came rushing in with stun guns, he finally looked over
his shoulder at the rest of them.  From the blank expression on his face,
Scarlett surmised that he’d never imagined getting this far and now he’d
forgotten what he was supposed to do next.

Scarlett
made desperate a “go, go, go!” motion with her hand, waving him towards the
outside door.

Benji
jolted out of his frozen shock.  “Right!”  He mouthed.  Nodding vigorously, he
all but ran out the door and towards the parking lot.  The outside door swung
shut behind him as he disappeared into the sunlight, fleeing the hospital.

He
was free.

There
was a moment of stunned silence as the other six digested his success.

“Holy
shit.”  Marrok slowly shook his head.  “That was amazing, Red.”  His mouth
curved like he was proud of her and he looked at Avenant.  “I
told
you
Letty would pull it off.  You owe me five gold coins, ya prick.”

She’d
done it!  Her plan had worked.  At least, this part of it.

Scarlett
bent over, her hands on her knees, and tried to remember how to breathe.

Later
that night, Benji would return with a boat.  They’d sneak out through the
library and meet him at the lakeshore.  Fifteen minutes later, she’d been in
the Enchanted Forest, headed for her grandmother’s house and redemption.  It
was all going to work…

So
long as Benji actually came
back
to the prison now that he was finally
unshackled from its bleak walls.  Which he totally would.  She was sure of it.

“We’ll
never see that ogre, again.”  Rumpelstiltskin predicted with a sigh.

Wolves are
bred to fight and fuck.

I always
bear that in mind, because it’s pointless to try and deal with them like they’re
thinking beings.

They are
just beautiful animals.

Psychiatric
case notes of Dr. Ramona Fae

Scarlett
measured the window with a string of several dozen uncooked noodles.  “So, if
each ziti is approximately an inch, we should all be able to fit through these
windows with no problem.”  She looked over at Marrok.  “That was another reason
it had to be Benji who went to get the boat.  No way would an eight foot bridge
ogre squeeze out a window.  He might’ve gotten stranded in here.”

Marrok
nodded like he gave a shit whether or not Benji came with them.  “That was
definitely a concern of mine.”  He deadpanned.

Thanks
to Dr. White’s seduction mandate, he and Letty were alone in the library, although
it was hard to see the mildewing interior as a particularly romantic setting. 
The mostly empty shelves were tipped at odd angles, only two light bulbs worked
in the entire large room, and the steady dripping sound of water was coming
from somewhere overhead.  He was fairly sure the Good folk only called it a
“library” to taunt the inmates.  It was no wonder the place was deserted.

But,
on the other hand, there was definitely an upside to being the only two people
in the space, regardless of how rank it was.  Marrok tipped his head to admire
his True Love’s posterior as she balanced on a chair.

Thank
God she was back in her own body again.  He’d missed it.

“So
now the only problem is how we get the window open.”  Still standing on the
seat of the chair, she dropped the skein of yard and freezer bag full of pasta
to the floor and turned her attention to the lock.  “Damn it, everything else
here is a rusty mess, but of
course
this would be brand new.”  She
turned to look at him.  “Can you pick it?”

“Yeah,
but it wouldn’t stop the alarm from going off.”  He nodded to the wires
attached to the frame.

Scarlett
frowned at it, her expression thoughtful.  “Breaking the glass would make too
much noise.  Maybe we could cut it.”

“The
craft room has safety scissors.”  Marrok suggested helpfully.

It
was so gratifying to have those blue eyes glaring at him, again.  The color was
a magic all its own.  He was definitely going to veto any more body switch
plans.

“Are
you going to help or not?”  She demanded.

He
endeavored to look innocent.  “I
am
helping.”  He moved behind her and
“helpfully” laid a hand on her “EVIL” t-shirt.  “Here let me steady you.”  His
palm slipped under the hem of her top and his thumb brushed the soft skin of
her lower back.

She
batted him away.

Marrok
chuckled, delighted with the girl.  In the most perverse way possible, he liked
that she was so prickly.  His looks didn’t matter to her, at all.  He never even
had to try with most women, but Letty was so hard to impress.