“I don’t need to be taken care of,” she said.
“Just like you don’t want to be held?”
Her mouth thinned with displeasure.
“You won’t let me get close,” he said. “You won’t challenge yourself to
feel
.”
She removed her cup from the microwave and added instant coffee. “It’s pretty ironic for you to accuse me of not challenging myself.”
“Why is that?”
“You wanted to be a big-shot navy SEAL—”
“SWCC,” he corrected.
“Whatever,” she said, stirring her coffee. “You have a college degree and military experience. This job doesn’t challenge a man with your skills. You gave up on your dream after one setback.”
“I didn’t give up,” he said through clenched teeth.
“You failed.”
“That’s right. I failed. And you’re so out of touch with human emotions that you fantasize about aliens fucking you.”
She flinched at the insult.
Josh felt an ugly surge of satisfaction at the sight. Instead of quitting while he was ahead, he twisted the knife. “Good luck on your dream of having a family. Maybe you and Mitch can adopt a half-robot, half-alien baby.”
Her eyes narrowed with anger. For a moment, he thought he was going to get a faceful of hot coffee, or a resounding slap. He deserved both, and he welcomed her ire. He wanted to duke it out with her and resolve their differences. If she was willing to take a risk on him, he’d do anything for her. They could challenge each other.
She didn’t lash out at him, however. Keeping her cool, she lifted the coffee to her lips and blew on the surface.
His gut clenched at the sight. That was when he knew his feelings went beyond infatuation, beyond explosive sexual chemistry, beyond respect and admiration. He was in love with her. And she wouldn’t even lower herself to argue with him.
Maybe they were doomed, and she was unreachable. She ran a tight ship, protecting her heart so diligently that even she couldn’t access it anymore. Nothing could get in or out. No one could penetrate her fortresses.
Josh wasn’t a quitter, despite her accusations, but his optimism only went so far. He couldn’t appeal to her emotions if she refused to acknowledge them. Helena was a stubborn woman, prickly and aloof. He liked her that way. He always had. The contrast between her icy veneer and the heat beneath excited him. Although she was well worth the fight, he couldn’t win by overpowering her. He had to find another way inside.
So he backed down and regrouped. He didn’t want to lose her by pushing too hard, or scare her away by professing his love. He just hoped he’d have another chance to get through to her before they got rescued.
He warmed up water for his own cup of coffee, giving her space. They had a lackluster breakfast of granola bars and bananas, just like the day before. While he was considering his next step, his cell phone chimed with a notification.
He almost flipped his chair over in his haste to check his messages. There wasn’t just one text, but three. The most recent communication was from the zoo director, under the heading “help is on the way.”
Halle-fucking-lujah.
He clicked to read the full message, with Helena at his side. The director, Tom Spears, was flying in with three colleagues and two keepers. The National Guard had dispatched a helicopter to the naval hospital to rescue several groups of patients. Tom would hitch a ride with the Guard and arrive with his crew shortly after 10:00 a.m. He expressed his profuse thanks to Josh and Helena, and requested details about Greg Patel.
“They’re coming to help us,” he said to Helena. “It’s over.”
Tears filled her eyes and she hugged him, forgetting their argument.
He was overwhelmed with relief, but also sad that their adventure had come to a close. He didn’t know how to reach her. As soon as they left the zoo, they’d be separated. They might not see each other for days or weeks while the park closed for repairs.
After she relayed the pertinent information about Greg and the code ones, she returned the phone to Josh. He checked the other two messages. The first was a short, happy note in all caps from Helena’s mother. Josh grinned at this, sharing her excitement. The next message was from his parents:
Flying home now. No word from Chloe. Please respond when you can. We love you so much, mom and dad.
The smile fell off his face. His parents hadn’t heard from his sister. After two full days, that wasn’t good. It didn’t necessarily mean that something terrible had happened to her, but it didn’t bode well.
“She could be stuck in the city, like we are,” Helena said. “There must be thousands of people in the same situation, cut off from communication.”
He collapsed in his chair, stunned by the news. What if Chloe and Emma had been dead this whole time, while he’d been messing around with Helena, getting stupid on whiskey and thinking with his dick?
Helena sat down next to him. He couldn’t bring himself to look at her. The whiskey bottle beckoned, but he couldn’t go there, either. He had to be a responsible adult. It was time to grow up and face facts.
He
was
a failure.
Although he didn’t appreciate having it pointed out to him, the truth was undeniable. He’d failed his scuba and water-rescue courses. He’d failed to advance in SWCC. He’d failed to achieve his lifelong goal.
That was okay with him, actually. He couldn’t have tried harder. His inability to function in deep water wasn’t a sign of weakness. It was just something in his body chemistry. A natural predisposition, like asthma. Even if he found a way to manage the condition, he was a poor candidate for the SWCC.
So he’d accepted the disappointment and moved on. His priorities had changed over the past ten years. When he was twenty, special-ops warfare had sounded awesome. He’d grown out of his skinny geek faze and overdosed on testosterone for a while. Like many young men, he’d reveled in his strength and physicality.
He’d mellowed since then. He still enjoyed being active, but he didn’t want to shoot people for a living. Zoo security suited him just fine.
Maybe he’d been coasting for a few years, finding his way. Some of his friends had traveled around the world after college. Others hadn’t even gone on to college. Starting a career wasn’t easy these days, and there was nothing wrong with chilling out for a while. It was better than working himself into an early grave. He couldn’t say he’d reached his full potential, however. As much as he hated to admit it, Helena was right.
He hadn’t been “all he could be.”
“If I’d stayed on reserves or transferred to the Coast Guard, I might have been part of the rescue efforts,” he said, glancing at her. “I could’ve searched for them.”
She looked stricken. “You don’t know that.”
“I don’t know anything.”
“They could be fine.”
“They could be dead, too.”
“You said you had a feeling they weren’t.”
“Yeah, well. I also had a feeling that you belonged with me, so maybe my gut feelings are bullshit.”
She fell silent, her expression troubled.
Agonizing over a situation beyond his control wasn’t going to help, and he didn’t want to sit here anymore, waiting for his chest to explode. “Let’s go check on Tau.”
She nodded her agreement. They had several hours to kill before help arrived, and plenty of loose ends to take care of. While he tidied up the staff room, she sanitized the animal hospital, spraying disinfectant on things and folding the blankets. He didn’t know what to do with the whiskey bottle, so he put it back in the box. After the director and his crew assessed the damages, they’d probably need a drink.
Helena flinched at the sight of the black-and-gold box. She couldn’t get rid of this evidence as easily as the lingering scent of sex on the blankets. For some reason, that made him feel better. If she never went out with him, she’d probably regret it. She’d think about their night together every time she looked at his face. Every time he spoke, she’d remember how his mouth had felt on her.
They brought the rifle and tranquilizer gun with them outside to the truck. He climbed into the driver’s seat while she took the passenger’s. “Should we ride the tram again?”
“Whatever.”
He wasn’t keen on watching her eyes dart around and her cheeks pale with nausea. She was already hung over. The motion of the tram might make her throw up. “I’ll just cruise around for a few minutes.”
“Fine.”
He’d gone only a few hundred feet when they came to an obstacle in the road: Bambang. Josh put on the brakes, wondering why the lizard wasn’t moving.
“Pull up on my side,” Helena said.
He skirted around Bambang and parked. “Is he dead?”
She rolled down the window to get a better look. “I think he’s unconscious.”
“From what?”
“I don’t know. Give me something to poke him with.”
He handed her his tactical baton. She leaned out to jab the prostrate lizard.
“He’s not moving,” she said. “Let’s go get a cage to put him in.”
Josh drove back to the storage yard and they loaded up another crate.
Helena put a leash around the lizard’s body, under his arms. She used that to pull his front half while Josh took the tail end. They transferred him to the cage, huffing and puffing. Bam was a heavy bastard, unwieldy as hell, jaws dripping venomous saliva. When they locked him inside the crate, Josh breathed a sigh of relief.
“Do you think he tangled with King?” he asked.
“It's possible. Komodo dragons will attack and eat cobras.”
Josh hadn’t seen any wounds. Maybe Bambang had gotten into something toxic. Eucalyptus leaves had a slight narcotic effect. It was a running joke among the staff that the koalas were members of the Rastafari.
Helena’s startled gaze met his. “The drugged meat,” she said. “He must have eaten it. That’s why Tau roared so loud.”
Josh’s heart sank at this news. If Bambang had taken the bait, Zuma was still fully alert and on the loose.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
C
HLOE WOKE IN A
fog of pain and confusion.
She was alone in a hotel room, her head pounding and her throat dry. She felt awful, as if she’d been drugged. She hadn’t been this jacked up since she’d spent a three-day weekend at the Coachella Festival.
There was a bottle of water on the nightstand. She fumbled for it and sat upright. When the room stopped spinning, she took a sip. Then she gulped down half the bottle, struck by a tremendous thirst.
Where was Emma? Where was
Mateo?
Had last night really happened? It seemed like a dream. A sweet, hot dream, too good to be true. She rose to her feet and hobbled toward the balcony. The sliding glass door was open, diaphanous curtains fluttering in the breeze.
“Emma,” Chloe croaked, starting to panic. “Emma!”
Mateo was standing by the pool with Emma in his arms. They both looked up at her. Mateo smiled and waved.
“Mama,” Emma said.
It hadn’t been a dream, Chloe realized. His smile was sort of self-satisfied, but not in an obnoxious way. He just seemed pleased, as if he considered himself lucky. She wondered what he expected from her.
Were they dating?
She hoped they were dating. He was hot and nice and fun to be with. Although the language barrier was a problem, it didn’t have to be a deal breaker. They’d communicated well enough so far. He’d understood her just fine in bed.
He was also an extraordinary person. He’d saved her and Emma. Chloe was the lucky one to have crossed paths with this brave man at the exact moment she’d needed him. It was almost as if he'd been sent by God to rescue her.
The thought made her dizzy.
She grasped the back of a patio chair to steady herself and took a few deep breaths. She felt feverish and strange. Her cheeks were hot, but she was cold. She wanted to go back to bed and climb under the covers.
Mateo asked her a question, his brow furrowed with concern. She was concerned, too. She forced a smile and went back inside, stumbling toward the bathroom. Her panties were hanging on the towel rack. He must have washed them for her. She tugged down her yoga pants and sat on the commode, studying her injured thigh. Around the bandage, her skin was splotchy, throbbing with heat.
No wonder she felt like crap. Her wound was infected.
Now what?
She wasn’t sure she’d make it the final blocks to the hospital. She didn’t want to stay here with Emma while Mateo went for help.
They weren’t as safe without him.
If Chloe’s fever got worse, she’d be unable to take care of Emma. Letting him take Emma wasn’t a good option, either. Chloe would go out of her mind with worry. He was obviously not her father, and he didn’t speak English well enough to explain.
Chloe just had to do what she always did. Keep moving forward, one step at a time.
After using the bathroom, she put on her damp underwear. There was no way she’d go to the hospital without panties. Maybe she’d feel better after breakfast. A pain reliever would reduce her fever and discomfort for a few hours.
Everything would be okay.
When she came out of the bathroom, Mateo was there with Emma. Chloe sat down in the chair by the table and held out her arms to her baby. He delivered Emma to her lap. Chloe hugged her tight, trying not to worry.
“Sorry for…” He gestured to the balcony. He was apologizing for taking Emma away. He’d probably wanted to let Chloe sleep in, which was nice.
“Did you see the pool?” she asked Emma.
“Swim!”
“You went swimming?”
“No,” Mateo said. “No swim. Just look.”
There was a basket of treats at the center of the table. Crackers, fruit, blueberry muffins, diet soda. He must have brought it up with him. Chloe sat Emma in the other chair and offered her a muffin, unpeeling the paper cup for her.
“How are you?” he asked carefully.
She opened a package of crackers and a diet soda, murmuring a vague answer. She didn’t know what to say about her worsening condition, but she had no regrets about their tryst. She’d never regret it, no matter what.
He watched her with cautious eyes, as if he feared she would denounce him.