Will To Live (16 page)

Ernie scowls at her, then huffs out a breath of frustration. Dustin quickly defuses the situation with humor, before it turns into an all out war between the couple, by telling them about something John had done. They all have a good laugh, though I have to admit, I was lost. Something about John, a spatula, the hospital cook, and the cook's misfortune of looking too much like a zombie one early morning.

I finally say my goodbyes, promising to visit again later.

After closing Ernie's door, Dustin stops me from going any further into the hall by placing his hand around my wrist.

“
Canada, have you seen your dad yet? Rex?”
 

“
Yes, as a matter of fact, I did. He looks great, Dustin. Better than he has in years.
Why
is
that
?” I ask with suspicion.
 

The door to the stairway down the hall opens, and the sound of voices echo down to us, just after a panicked look comes over Dustin's face. The clank and clatter of the doctor's items being moved from one floor to the other creates a bad atmosphere for any private conversation.

And after the reactions I've been getting concerning my dad, if I can't find out in private, I'll damn sure find out in public when I go on a frikken rampage through the property.

“
Got an empty room? You
will
tell me what the hell is going on with my own dad, Dustin.” I grab his hand and pull him toward the door he reluctantly indicates. After yanking him inside, I slam the door, then turn on him. Crossing my arms, I raise a brow, and wait.
 

“Why couldn't her own f
amily have told her this shit?” he mumbles, then parks his ass on the examining table and motions for me to take a seat on the chair across from it. Instead, I lean back against the door, just to be defiant, until I get the answers no one seems to want to tell me.
 

“
Okay. So your dad had heart problems, which you know– Damn it, Canada! I don't want to be the one to tell you this. Let me go get the rest of your family, and we–”
 

“
No! Right now. I'm not waiting one more freaking second. Just tell me, Dustin.”
 

Dustin looks around desperately, and I almost lose it when I see him mentally judge if he can safely make it to the ground if he were to try jumping from a window that is much too small for his big frame. Finally, his body sags in defeat, and he begins to talk.

“
Alright, fine. You win. Your dad was given one of the shots we had for Greg. I–”
 

“
What! Are you guys fucking nuts! You don't even know anything about that shit yet. What the hell were you thinking!”
 

“
Canada, wait! Let me finish first.”
 

I cross my arms again, slam my backside back against the door, and force myself to calm down – or at least – to stay silent, so he can dig himself into a much deeper hole.

“
No one knew. I
swear
! He did it on his own. He came in, grabbed a syringe, and gave it to himself. I wasn't even in the building. He said he had lost his Nitro pills and didn't want to burden anyone, since we were already crowded with patients, and at that time, we were. But you
know
I would have taken care of him had he told me.
You do know that,
right
?”
 

I nod slowly, my anger fading toward him since I now believe he really had nothing to do with it. But the fear rises.

“
He finally confessed when I discovered that one of the vials was missing a dose, and Greg insisted he hadn't touched it. Yes, I should have kept it locked away, that's something I
will
take the blame for. But I would never have given him that shit without testing it for a hell of a long time. We have no idea what it does, besides keeping people from turning into a zombie once they've been bit. In Greg's case, we couldn't figure out exactly why he was taking the shot. We never heard of any bite, so we thought maybe it had just been given to him to cure the cancer. If that were the case, this drug would have been much more valuable than we first thought. Turns out, after talking with Greg one afternoon, the cancer didn't have a damn thing to do with his need for the shot – at least, not that we know of. The chemo most likely
was
the only reason he won his fight with cancer, not the shot. Though really, we don't know for sure that the shot
didn't
help in
some
way. Will his cancer come back? Possibly. If it doesn't, we–”
 

Dustin stops when clear my throat, raise one brow, and give him the evil eye with the other.

“
Dustin,
why
did Greg say he was taking the shot?” I ask him impatiently, getting him back on track.
 

“
Oh, sorry. He told us about something that happened one day while he was living with Jake that just about blew our minds, not to mention, made us worry even more for you. Greg told us that Jake had come home from a long trip he had taken for the military, and he looked pretty bad. Greg said his skin was pale, his eyes were ringed with black circles, and his flesh was hot with fever. He wasn't the same Jake that had left a month and a half before – the same patient, gentle Jake that Greg had known his whole life. He was highly agitated and unable to relax to even have a normal conversation with Greg. When Greg asked his brother what was wrong with him, Jake became unreasonably angry, and for a brief moment, he lost control and attacked Greg, biting him on his lower leg.
 

“
Greg punched his brother in the face, which stunned Jake. Greg then said his brother's eyes seemed to focus a little better, and Jake had seemed horrified at what he'd done. Jake then let out a scream of terror when he saw the bite mark on his little brother's leg, then he ran into his bedroom, grabbed a syringe from the dufflebag he brought back from his trip, and jabbed the needle into his own arm. Greg was certain Jake was on some kind of street drug at that point. But then Jake stuck the needle into Greg, too fast for Greg to stop him.
Then
Jake took the time to explain it to Greg...
well, not really.
He left out a lot of important details.
 

“
Jake certainly didn't tell his brother that he was infected with a zombie virus, or that Greg was most likely infected, as well. He had made up some other story about an infection that could kill them both if they didn't continue to take the shot on a regular basis. Jake explained that he had picked up some virus overseas when he was on his last trip for the military. Greg had no reason not to believe him, why would he? This was his brother, he trusted him with his life.”
 

I nod, then make my way to the chair, where I collapse under the sudden exhaustion I feel.

Poor Greg. Jake meant everything to him. Then to find out that your own brother kept such important shit from you. Shit that affected your very life. Shit that could have had very serious consequences had something happened to Jake. Where would Greg have gotten the injection when he ran out? Would someone have helped him if Greg had contacted the military? Or would they have experimented on him in hundreds of horrible, inhumane ways?

“
So, anyway, back to your dad,”
Dustin interrupts my thoughts.
“
After he took the shot, and finally admitted it, I kept him in observation for a few weeks. I have no way of knowing for sure, unless I can get to a hospital that still has some juice left in its generator, but I'm starting to believe his heart has done the impossible, and was repaired. He doesn't need the Nitro pills anymore, he doesn't run short of breath as much anymore, and he looks great! Claims to feel great too. I let him leave the hospital, but I
promise
you, I
am
keeping an eye on him. I have no idea if he will need to keep taking the shots, or not. That's something we're just going to have to figure out as we go. I'm sorry, Canada. Really.”
 

I shrug, and give Dustin a weak smile. “I understand, Dustin, and I don't blame you. He
is
my dad, after all. I know exactly how stubborn that man is. I'm just worried about him.”
 

“
I know, Canada. I understand that. And I want you to know that I will continue to do whatever I can to help.”
 

A crash brings us both to our feet, and out into the hallway. We see two men that I don't know at the doorway to Dustin's new office, struggling to lift the doctor's heavy wooden desk. Dustin excuses himself before heading their way, and I wander down the rest of the hall on my own. No other doors are closed, except a janitor's closet, and the rest of the rooms are empty. I go back and tell Dustin that I'll see him later, then head down the stairs.

At the bottom, I slowly open the door and search for John. Not seeing or hearing him, I sneak into the hall and make it to the reception area. Terry tells me the coast is clear when she sees me peeking out of the small crack I'd made in the door. I smile at her in thanks, although I'm a little embarrassed to be caught sneaking around, and give her a quick wave as I leave the building.

Outside, the heat of the sun is strong and takes away the chill of winter, temporarily. The snow is quickly turning to water, which turns the ground to mud. The property is full of people – some working, some standing around in groups. Laughter and voices in every pitch and volume, and the sound of battery-powered tools fill my ears. Kids of all ages shout and scream as they have snowball fights in what little is left of the snow. I smile, move my sunglasses from the top of my head down to cover my eyes, then make my way to the house.

As I enter, the rush of noise from inside almost forces me back out.

Seriously, it actually scares me for a second.

But then I see Nick's eyes glued on me, fighting his way through the crowd as he heads in my direction. I sigh, knowing this won't be very pleasant.

“
Canada, we need to find Vicki. I told her whether I found you or not, I would head this way. She should have been here by now. What if she needs help?”
 

“
So...
what
? We just go out and drive around, hoping we find her? Did you happen to tell her which direction to go, a highway to stick to,
anything
to give us a clue where to start?” I ask him.
 

“
Well, no, but I told her to head to northwestern Missouri. We can't just do nothing! She's just a kid,” his voice lowers along with his head.
 

“
Now
she's just a kid?” I leave it at that, but he gets the point when I see his face flush and his head lowers even more.
 

“
Alright, fine. Let me go talk to my husband, and the rest of the family. Get everything ready for us. Prepare for at least eight people, maybe more.”
 

Nick nods, and rushes out the door while I take a deep breath, because I know that trying to convince
my family to let me leave so soon after just getting back will
not
be a fun experience.
 

I find Will in the living room sitting on the couch and talking to some of the same people I had planned to ask to come with us. I squeeze my ass in between my husband and my brother, Ricky – and succeed – even though I have to endure the bitching and whining coming from both men, not to mention a couple others who were already quite comfortable on the long couch.

I call for attention, and wait – my stomach churning – as Ryder and his wife Coco, Ricky and his wife Kally, Will, Gage, and Joel finally quiet down and turn to me. My stomach churns in anticipation of the fight that will soon be in progress.

“
Listen, there's a truck-full of people who need our help. They should have been here be now. Hell, they should have
beat
us here. We
have
to go find them.”
 

I tense up as I wait for the yelling to start and for them to inform me that I'm not going anywhere – and I prepare myself for the need to yell even louder than all of them combined, informing them that I sure as hell
am
going.
 

Instead, they shock me when they all agree quickly and easily, and begin to exit the room to prepare for the trip. I sit, frozen to the couch in shock, until Will stops, and looks back at me.

“
You going, or staying here?” he asks, holding his hand out to me.
 

I stand, grab his hand, and hold on tight as he leads me to a bedroom upstairs that has obviously been made into our very own room. Small personal things that we had managed to take with us from our home back in Illinois have found their way inside. Mostly it's just our clothes, but I feel tears well up when I see the framed photos of our boys lining a small part of the wall. And our wedding photo!

I have no idea how Will managed to sneak them all out in those last frantic moments back home – or how he'd managed to keep them safe, but he did. And I never once knew they were with us.

Have I mentioned how much I love that man?

I watch as Will opens drawers, then the closet. He throws a bundle of clothes toward me – which are, thankfully, a set of my fatigues and underwear, then he grabs a set of fatigues for himself. Still shocked speechless from both my family's reactions and now the photos, I say nothing as I pull the clothes on...until I hear muffled laughter coming from Will's direction.

“
What?” I look up from the buttons on my shirt to see his humor-filled eyes on me. “What the hell's so funny?”
 

I look down to make sure I hadn't screwed up the order of the buttons, then look down at my pants.