With Me in Seattle Bundle One (63 page)

I hang up and glare at my phone.  I don’t like his tone. 

“Hey, guys, I’m going to go find a quiet spot and call Nate real quick.  He’s been trying to reach me all day.  Don’t have that baby without me.  I’ll be right back.”  I kiss Natalie’s cheek and walk down the hall to a small, empty waiting room.  Our family must be out in the larger one near the hospital entrance.

I scroll down to Nate’s name and press Send.

“Julianne.” He sounds relieved and pissed at the same time.

“Hey, can you talk?”

“Yes, I’m at the hotel.  Where the fuck have you been?”

“Don’t yell at me.  I’m at the hospital.” 

“What’s wrong?  Are you hurt?” His voice is suddenly panicked, and I feel like a shit.

“No,” I respond, my voice calm now and soothing.  “Natalie’s in labor, Nate.  I’m sorry I didn’t call.  I got the call this morning at the office after I texted you, and I raced here to meet them, and I’ve been with her ever since.  It’s been a long day.  Still no baby.”

“Is she okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, she’s doing great.  Luke is, too, surprisingly.  It shouldn’t be too much longer.”

“You should have called.” His voice is cold again, and I’m tired, and I do not need this right now.

“I already apologized.”

“I’ve been worried. Also, what the fuck happened to the report I asked you to send me?”

“What are you talking about? I finished it and asked Jenny to send it for me because I forgot to hit send on the e-mail before I ran out of the office. She sent me a text and said that it was done.” What the hell happened to my report?

“I got it, but it was half-assed done. That’s not like you.”

“That report was perfect, Nate. I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.” I run my hand through my hair in frustration.

“When I’m out here alone, I need to be able to depend on you to do your job in the office, Julianne.”

“You’re not alone. Ask Carly to fix the fucking report, Nate. She should be earning her paycheck while she’s with you.” Not that I really believe that Carly is there, but now I’m just fucking pissed off.

There’s silence on the other end of the line, and finally, Nate responds with a deceptively quiet, “What are you talking about? Carly isn’t in New York.”

“She said you sent for her.”

“Why would I do that?” His voice is rising, and I take a deep breath.

“Clearly, there’s been a misunderstanding,” I say as calmly as possible.

“Obviously.”

“Look, Nate, I’m sorry.  I need to get back to Natalie.  I don’t have time for you to get protective and bossy and needy on me today.”

“That’s what you think I’m doing?” he asks, and I cringe at the hurt in his voice.

“That’s exactly what you’re doing.”

“No, Julianne, I’m not being bossy or needy.  I have been worried about the woman I care about because I couldn’t reach you today.” 

I’ve hurt his feelings. “Nate,” I sigh and rub my forehead.  “Maybe we should just talk when you get home.”

“What are you saying?” His voice is hushed and nervous.

“I need to deal with this right now, and you need to focus on the deal out there.  I’ll be in the office tomorrow to help you from there, and I’ll try to clean up the damn report mess and get it to you ASAP. We’ll just talk about the rest of it when you get home.  I don’t have time for this relationship bullshit right now.”

“That’s what we are to you, Julianne?  Bullshit?”

Fuck.  No!  This is all coming out wrong, and I need to get back to Natalie!

“I have to go.”

“If that’s the way you want it, fine, but know this, baby: You’re only off the hook because I’m three thousand fucking miles away and can’t get to you right now.”

“Jesus, you’re such a caveman, Nate.”

“Text me later and let me know you’re safe.  I’ll talk to you tomorrow night.”

“I thought you were staying until Thursday.”

“I changed my mind.” 

The line goes dead, and I hang my head.  I shouldn’t have been so mean to him.

I walk back into Natalie’s room, and all hell has broken loose.

“I was only gone for five minutes.  What the hell?”

Natalie’s feet are in stirrups, and the doctor is sitting on a stool between her legs.  There are two nurses bustling about the room, and a baby cradle with a heating lamp has been wheeled in.

“She’s about ready to push,” Luke says, his eyes desperate with worry and fear.

“Wow, that epidural is a miracle.” 

“Holy shit, I have to push.”  Natalie is writhing on the bed, and if it wasn’t my best friend, I’d say it looks like something out of a horror movie. 

“Okay, we’re ready, Natalie.  If you feel like you have to push with the contraction, go ahead.”

“It’s too hot in here.”  She yanks the blanket off her and throws it onto the floor, not giving two shits about being naked in front of all of us.  Well, she is wearing a black sports bra, so just the bottom half is naked.

I glance down, then feel my jaw drop.  It’s not the fact that her hoo-ha is on display, but what’s right above it that gives me pause.

“Jesus H. Christ, Natalie, you have a tattoo on your vagina!”

Chapter Sixteen

“Six pounds, ten ounces!” Nurse Ashlynn declares proudly as little baby Olivia lies on the baby scale, crying angrily. 

I raise Nat’s camera and snap a long stream of photos, capturing the weight on the machine in the photo, in case anyone ever has the audacity to forget.  Zooming in on her tiny feet and fingers, I snap more photos before the nurse wraps Olivia up in a pink and blue hospital baby blanket.

Luke is beside me, gazing down at his dark-haired daughter with such love in his eyes.  When the baby was born and placed on Natalie’s belly, he and Natalie were both crying wrecks, and if I’m honest, I was, too. 

“Thank you for letting me be here.”

Luke’s blue eyes slide over to mine, and he wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me to his side.

“We love you, Jules.  It’s right that you’re here.”

Oh.  Well, that just makes me cry again.

“God, I’m a blubbering mess.”

Luke laughs at me and takes his little bundle from the nurse, kissing Olivia’s tiny little forehead softly. 

“She is so beautiful,” he whispers.

“Hey!  Can I hold her?” Natalie calls from the bed, all covered up now, thank Jesus.

I’m never having babies.  My body can’t do that.

Luke crosses the room and places the baby in Nat’s arms and kisses her on the lips.  He caresses the baby’s cheek with his finger and looks lovingly into Nat’s eyes.

“Thank you, baby.”

“I love you,” Nat whispers.

“God, I love you, too.”

I raise the camera and snap more photos, capturing the most beautiful moment I’ve ever seen.  I walk around the end of the bed, still snapping, and both Luke and Nat look up at me and grin widely, their smiles just a little tired, so proud of what they’ve made.

“You are a gorgeous family,” I murmur, and Nat’s eyes well up.

“I’m going to go fill everyone in,” Luke says.  He kisses Natalie passionately, earning a token eye-roll from me, kisses the baby’s cheek, and pulls away.  “Jules, are you going to stay?”

“Yes, I’ll stay with our girls until you get back, then I’ll give you some alone time with them.”

“Thank you.”  He walks to me and wraps me in his arms, hugging me tightly.  Luke’s an affectionate guy, but this is different.  Special.  “Thank you, sweet girl,” he whispers in my ear, then walks out to talk to our families.

Well, hell.

“Hey.”  I walk over to the side of the hospital bed and take a few more pictures of Natalie and Olivia, then set the camera aside and sit on the bed next to them.  “You did good, friend.”

“Thank you.  So did you.  Thank you for reminding Luke to breathe before he passed out.”

We both laugh, and I know that’s one moment I’ll never let him forget.  “That’s what I’m here for.”  I tuck a spare strand of hair behind Nat’s ear and grin down at the baby.  “She’s so pretty, Nat.  I mean, how can she not be with parents who look like you guys do, but seriously, she’s gorgeous.”

“I think so, too.  I’m a mommy, Jules.” 

“And I’m an auntie again!  Oh my God, that’s cool.”  We grin stupidly at each other.  “Okay, so, when did you get a tat on your va-jay-jay?”

She shrugs and adjusts the blanket around Olivia.  “About two years ago. And it’s not on my va-jay-jay, which I’m pretty sure is not the official medical term for that part of my anatomy.”

“Wanna tell me what it says?”

“Nope.”

“Are you ever going to tell me what any of them say?”

“Probably.”

“Okay.”  Enough tattoo talk.  “Can I hold her for a minute before I go?”

“Of course!  Here.”  She hands me the small bundle and scoots over on the bed a little so we can curl up together. 

“How do you feel?” I ask.

“Sore, but the drugs are delightful.  I am looking forward to getting my old body back.”

“You didn’t get any stretch marks, you bitch.”

She smiles smugly.  “Lots of shea butter and yoga.  Remember that.”

“I’m not doing babies.”  I shake my head adamantly.  No way. 

“Right, says the woman snuggling with a baby right now.”

“I can snuggle with babies.  They don’t have to come from my body.”  I shake my head again and smile as Olivia makes a sucky motion with her lips. “She might be hungry.”

“I’m hungry,” Nat responds.  “Can you call the nurse?  I want mashed potatoes and gravy.  Stat.”

“So much for getting your old body back.” I smirk and push the call button.

“Don’t be a bitch.  I just had a baby.  I can have whatever I want.”

***

Luke comes back with our parents while all the siblings are still waiting their turn for a quick visit, and I decide it’s a good time to sneak out.  I know that my mom will make sure that everyone keeps their visits to a minimum so Luke and Nat can enjoy some alone time with their daughter and so Nat can rest.

I make it down to the small empty waiting room that I called Nate from earlier, and I’m suddenly flooded with emotion.  I can’t stop the tears from falling, and I’m crying so hard my knees buckle.

I collapse into a chair and hold my face in my hands, my elbows on my knees, and let the tears flow. 

“Hey, what’s wrong, Bean?”  I gasp and look up, and there’s my brother Matt in the doorway.  He’s called me String Bean since we were kids.

I can’t speak to him.  Seeing his calm, kind face makes me cry harder, and before I know it, he’s kneeling before me and pulling me into a big hug, stroking my back.

“It’s okay.  Cry it out.”

I’m not a crier, but it feels like that’s all I’ve done over the past few weeks.  I don’t know what to do with all of these new emotions running through me.

Finally, the tears stop, and Matt hands me a box of Kleenex from a nearby table.

“What was that all about?” he asks as I blow my nose.  He sits in the chair beside me.

“I’ve been so worried about Natalie and the baby all day, and I’m exhausted, and I was mean to Nate on the phone, and I just love that baby so much, and I hate crying.”

Matt chuckles and strokes my back again.  “Hey, it’s okay.  Having babies is exhausting, even for the helpers.  Nat and Olivia are fine, Nate will get over it, and you just need to sleep.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”  I sit back and look over at my handsome brother.  Of all of us, he’s the only one with darker hair, but he’s as tall as my other brothers and just as built.  He’s a Seattle cop, and he’s badass in a calm, controlled way.  He doesn’t have Caleb’s temper or Will’s arrogance.  He’s quiet.  But he will fuck you up if he needs to.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“I was going to pop in and see the baby, say congratulations, and then head into work.”

“Working night shift?” I ask.

“Yeah, I picked up some extra shifts.”  He stands and helps me to my feet.  “Feel better?”

“I do, thanks.  I’m going to go home and sleep off this weird mood.”

“Okay, drive safe, Bean.”

“You, too.”  I kiss his cheek and head for home.

***

My bed feels delicious.  And empty.  I settle in, ready to go to sleep early, and grab my phone.  Should I call Nate and apologize for being a raging bitch, or just text him and talk to him tomorrow?

I choose to text and think up a really nice way to apologize when I see him.

I’m home.  Baby and mom are healthy.

I lie back and start to drift when my phone pings.

Ok

Okay?  That’s it?  I frown.  This is not the Nate I know and have grown to love.  He’s pissed off at me, and when I think back to the way I spoke to him, I don’t blame him.  He was just worried about me, after all. 

I decide to call him and apologize.  He answers on the second ring.

“Hello, Julianne.” 

I don’t like the cold tone of his voice. “Hi,” I murmur.

“Hi.”

“Nate, I’m sorry about earlier.  I really am.”

I hear him sigh, and I feel even more guilty, knowing how much stress he has on him over work, and I know I made him even more worried today and hurt his feelings.  And I love him, I don’t want to hurt him.

“I think we need to discuss a few things tomorrow night.” 

Oh, so apology not accepted. “Okay,” I whisper and hear him sigh again.  “I miss you.”

“Do you.”

God, I really screwed up.

“Yes.” 

Silence.

“Please say something.”

“What do you want me to say?” he asks.

“I don’t know.”  I feel tears threatening again, and I try to keep them out of my voice.  “I just don’t want you to be mad at me.”

“I’m not mad.  I’m disappointed and hurt, Julianne.  That’s twice that you’ve managed to hurt my feelings.”

“I didn’t want to hurt you, Nate.  Today was hard, and I didn’t know how to deal with it.”

“Like I said, we have some things to talk about tomorrow.  I’d rather we didn’t do it over the phone.  I need to see your face.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re too good at trying to hide what you’re feeling behind that badass persona of yours, but your eyes don’t lie.”