With Me in Seattle Bundle One (64 page)

Holy shit.

“I am not lying to you, Nate.  I miss you, and I’m sorry that I was a bitch today.”

“Don’t ever call yourself a bitch again.” 

Jesus!
 
I can’t say anything right! “I’m going to let you go. This isn’t getting us anywhere.  Do you need a ride from the airport tomorrow night?”

“No.”

“Are you going to come to my place?”

“No, go to my place after work.”

“I don’t have a key.”

“Yes, you do.”

Huh? “I do?”

“Yes, check your key ring.  I put it on there last weekend.”  His voice is softer now, and I’m shocked.

“Oh.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

“Good night.”

“Good night, Julianne.”

Chapter Seventeen

This has been the day from hell.  I was late to work this morning, after sleeping like the dead last night and through my alarm.  Mrs. Glover was not pleased to see me this morning, but when I explained what happened and showed her the photos of baby Olivia on my phone, she softened up a bit and said she understood.

Thank goodness.

Not that she’s my boss, but I do not want to make an enemy of her.

Nate has been in constant communication with me all day, sending e-mails requesting documents or research to be done, but nothing at all personal. As soon as I got to my office this morning, I opened the document I had Jenny e-mail to Nate yesterday and was stunned to see that Nate was right. It was half-done and riddled with mistakes. It was
not
the final draft I’d finished, saved and attached to the e-mail to go out to him. I don’t know what the fuck happened, but I hope that the extra work I’ve put in this morning has helped straighten the mess out.

I feel shitty for making Nate think that our relationship isn’t important to me.  Of course it is.  But there are times that he’s just so…bossy.  I know he’s a strong, intelligent man, and that he wants to protect me and care for me, but I’ve always been so fiercely independent, I forget that I’m no longer a “me” but part of a “we.”

I need to make it up to him.  But how?

I’m pondering this when another e-mail comes through from Nate.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013 14:28

From: Nathan McKenna

To: Julianne Montgomery

Subject:  Departing

Julianne,

I am about to board the plane back to Seattle.  Once you’ve finished with the reports I emailed to you earlier, you are free to leave for the day.

Nate

He’s still so cold, although I know that in work e-mail he doesn’t really have a choice.  He could have texted me with something more personal, and the fact that he didn’t makes me really nervous.

Did I fuck up so badly yesterday that he’s going to break it off?

Wednesday, May, 15, 2013 14:35

From: Julianne Montgomery

To: Nathan McKenna

Subject:  Re: Departing

Nate,

Safe travels.  See you in the office tomorrow.

Julianne

But he’s not getting off that easy.  I pull out my phone and send him a text.

Please travel safely. I’m excited to see you tonight.

There is no response.

Shit.

***

I’m later getting to Nate’s than I really intended to be.  I stopped by the hospital to see Natalie, Luke and Olivia, and I couldn’t go empty-handed, so I shopped a little on the way.  I ended up with a huge, supersoft giraffe and a tiny pink onesie that says, “Birth: Nailed It.”

I don’t have any idea if Nate has already made it home because I haven’t heard a peep from him.  I guess I’ll find out when I get there.

I park in my usual space, leave my suitcase in the car in case I’m not welcome to stay tonight, and ride the elevator to his floor. As the elevator climbs, so does my anxiety level.

Based on how things have gone over the past twenty-four hours, I’m inclined to believe that things may be done between us.  The thought of it makes me hurt like nothing ever has before.

I walk down to his door and put my shiny new key in the lock.  I step into Nate’s apartment and immediately sense that I’m alone.

He’s not home yet.

It’s chilly inside, so I switch on his gas fireplace to warm the space, and turn on a few lamps in the living room and the light over the kitchen stove.

Maybe I should cook for him?  I wonder if he’s eaten.

I’m standing in the middle of Nate’s sexy kitchen, wondering what to do with myself, when the front door opens and he walks inside, pulling his small black suitcase behind him.  He’s wearing another dark suit and tie, and his hair is pulled back off his face.

He’s still in executive mode.

“I’ll be right back,” he murmurs and walks through the great room toward his bedroom without sparing me a glance.

Maybe I should just save him the trouble of telling me it’s over and leave now.  I know he’s mad, and I wasn’t expecting a scene from a movie where we run toward each other in slow motion and hold on for dear life.  We saw each other just yesterday morning, for Pete’s sake, but I was hoping for something a little warmer than that.

My heels click on the hardwood as I walk to the couch and gather my purse and wrap, and then I head to the front door.  My hand is on the knob when I hear his hard voice across the room.

“If you walk through that door, so help me God, Julianne, I will tie you to my bed.”

I lower my head and sigh.  I’m so confused.  He wants me to stay?

“Look at me.”  It’s not a request.

I turn around and face him.  He’s changed into a soft gray T-shirt and black jeans, and his hair is down.  He’s shed his professional clothes and is just a man standing before me.

An angry man.

“Where are you going?” he asks and crosses his arms over his chest.

“Home.”

“Why?”

“You don’t seem to be terribly happy to see me.”  I’m proud of keeping my voice steady despite the tears that want to come.

God, I’m such a girl.

Regret moves through his eyes, and he frowns and runs a hand through his hair.  He doesn’t say anything for a long moment, and I take that to mean that I’m right.  I close my eyes and hang my head, bracing myself for the goodbye.

“It’s okay, Nate.  I get it.  I’ll go.” I turn back toward the door, and before I know what’s happening, Nate twirls me around and grips my shoulders in his large, strong hands, holding me in front of him, his feral eyes trained on mine.  He’s panting, and he’s just so
angry.

“You are not running again.”

“I’m not going to stay where I’m not wanted.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ve barely heard from you since last night.  You won’t talk to me.  You’re cold and distant.  I’m not an idiot, Nate, I know when someone’s trying to break it off.”

He clenches his teeth and closes his eyes, then looks at me with such need my knees almost buckle. 

“I don’t know how to deal with how I feel for you.  I was a wreck yesterday when I couldn’t reach you.  No one at the office knew where you ran off to, and you wouldn’t answer me.  When you finally did call me, you brushed me off and told me I’m ridiculous and that our relationship is bullshit.”

“That’s not what I—”

“That’s what you said,” he interrupts me and grips me tighter.  “No one hurts me, Julianne.  No one.  I don’t give a flying fuck what anyone thinks of me.  That’s what got me through fighting, and it’s what’s gotten me to where I am now.  And then you came into my life, and you just blindsided me.  I am so fucking wrapped up in you I can’t see straight, and you tell me I’m a caveman for wanting to protect you and that our relationship is bullshit.”

Tears are running down my cheeks at the despair and loss on his face.  My God, I had no idea his feelings for me are so strong.  That he feels for me the same way that I feel for him.

I’ve never been so relieved and devastated at the same time.  How am I going to fix this?

“I don’t know how to deal with it either, Nate.” I cup his face in my hands.  “I was so sure that you were finished with me, that I’d pissed you off so badly that we couldn’t fix it.  I didn’t mean that our relationship is bullshit.  I didn’t.”  I stress this and look him dead in the eyes.  He’s watching me, listening, and I continue.

“Everything happened so fast yesterday.  I was a mess, and I’m never a mess.  You were gone, Carly at work was bragging to me about how she’s banging you and running off to New York with you”—Nate blanches, but I keep going before he can speak—“and then Luke called, freaking out because Nat’s water broke.  I just left and went to the hospital, forgetting everything else.”  I take a deep breath and wipe my tears away with my fingers.

“When Natalie finally agreed to take the meds, I checked my phone and saw that you’d been trying to reach me, and I called you right away.  I swear, I didn’t mean to hurt you at all, but I was annoyed that you were annoyed with me, and I had so much going through my head.  I said the wrong thing, and I apologize again.”

“Jules, I’m sure I could have handled things better too, I just…” He swallows and looks down, carefully choosing his words.  “I just hate the fact that I have this primal need inside of me to protect you. I’ve never felt this about anyone before, and you just don’t need me.  I’m so proud of you for being the independent, confident, intelligent woman you are, but you don’t need me, and I want to take care of you, more than you will ever know.”

He releases my shoulders and runs his hands down my arms to link his fingers in mine. He’s so wrong.  I do need him.

I take a deep breath, steeling myself for the words I’m about to say.  I grip his fingers with mine and realize we’re still standing by the doorway.  I don’t want to break this moment by suggesting we sit, so I look into his eyes again and bare my soul. 

“You’re so wrong,” I whisper.  He frowns and looks apprehensive again.  “You once said to me that if I’d been paying attention for the past year I would have seen that I’m the only woman you’re interested in.”  I swallow and look down at his chest.

“Look at me,” he whispers, and I comply, seeing hope in his gorgeous gray eyes.

“Well, if you’d been paying attention, Nate, you would have seen that I’ve been in love with you since long before we first made love in this apartment.”  His eyes widen in wonder, and my stomach settles as calm washes over me, and I know that this is right.  “I do need you.  I hated that you were away yesterday.  I wanted to come home to you last night and tell you all about the baby and the delivery.  I need your strength.  Yes, I’m a badass, but there are times that I need someone to hold me up, too, and I didn’t know until I found you that that doesn’t make me weak. It means that I’ve found my partner.”

“Julianne…” His voice is rough with emotion, and he leans his forehead on mine, wraps his arms around me and holds me close.  “Say it again.”

“Which part?” I ask with a laugh.

“The good part,” he whispers.

“I need you.”

“The other good part.”

I run my fingers down his smooth cheek and brush my lips over his, breathing him in. “I love you.”

“Oh, baby, I love you, too.”  Nate scoops me into his arms and carries me to his bedroom, turning on the sidelight, and lowers me gently to my feet.  He pulls my hair out of the tie holding it off my face and runs his fingers through it. 

“I love how soft your hair is.”  He unzips my simple, black shift dress, letting it fall down my arms and onto the floor.  My bra and panties follow it, and he steps back, enjoying the view.

“Like what you see?” I ask and smile.

“God, you’re so fucking hot.” 

Oh.  When he says it like that, my panties go all wet, and I just want to lick him.

“I want you naked, Nate.”  I walk to him and pull his T-shirt up over his head.  He raises his arms and backs out of the shirt, making it easier for me.  I unfasten his jeans and slide them, along with his boxer-briefs, down his legs and off his feet as he steps out of them.

Nate lifts me and lays me on the bed.  He kisses my stomach, my breasts and collarbones as he crawls up my body and nestles his large, thick cock against my folds.  I run my hands down his back to his ass and smile up into his molten gray eyes.

He kisses me, softly, tenderly, brushing my lips in that expert way of his. I lift my legs and wrap them around his hips.  As I do, I feel his apa brush against my clit, and I gasp.

Nate smiles against my lips.  “Like that?” he asks.

“God, yes.”

“If you don’t, I’ll take it out.” 

My wide eyes find his, and I cup his face in my hands. “You don’t have to do that for me.”

“I’d do anything for you.”

And here come a few more tears.  God, when will they stop?

“Julianne, I’ll do anything to make you happy.” He brushes the hair at my temples off my face and gazes at me with such love it takes my breath away.

“You do make me happy.  Keep the apa.  I like it.”  I grin and tilt my hips, rubbing him against me, and moan again.  “I more than like it.”

Nate laughs and starts to rock his hips just a little faster, sliding the tiny metal ball against my clit with each stroke.

“God, don’t stop doing that.”  I push my hands into his black hair and hold his face to mine, kissing him passionately as those little metal balls do amazing things to me. “Oh, honey, shit…”

“Yes, baby, let go.”  He rocks once, twice more and bites gently on my lower lip, and I fall over the edge. 

He reaches down between us and guides himself inside me, slowly stretching me, and my already sensitive muscles clench around him tightly.

“Fuck, don’t do that.  I’ll come too fast.”

“I can’t help it. You feel so damn good.”

He cups my breast in his hand and massages the nipple as he moves in and out of me at a slow, easy pace, watching my face, smiling softly down at me.  “You are amazing.  I love watching your beautiful face when I’m inside you.”

God, I love it when he talks like this.

“Faster, babe,” I whisper, but his grin widens, and he keeps the same gentle pace.

“No, this is going to have to be slow and steady, baby.”  His mouth finds mine once again, and his tongue teases me. His mouth slowly moves across my own, his whole body loving mine, oh so slowly.