Without a Past (20 page)

He gave her the smile she was fishing for. “Lars didn't talk about his past. I got the impression he'd lost touch with his family. When I told him the Internet could help him look for lost loved ones, he clammed up, mumbling something about government spies.”

She scooted a little bit closer and said under her voice, “You know, for a hermit, Lars had an awfully big box of condoms.”

Jonathan nearly choked on his laugh. Would there ever be a time when he could predict what might come out of her mouth? “Lars told me the veteran's hospital gave him all kinds of freebies. He loved the idea of sticking it to Uncle Sam.”

For some reason, the color drained from her face. “When was the last time he visited the hospital? Do condoms have expiration dates? Why wouldn't they? Rubber bands go bad in the drawer. I have things popping loose all the time.”

It took him a minute to figure out that she was afraid one of the condoms they'd used might have failed. Which meant this probably wasn't the right time to remind her they'd
actually forgotten to use protection when they'd made love just before dawn—both of them too into the moment to stop.

“I'm sure everything's fine,” he said. “Worst-case scenario we have to get married.”

She shot him a look of pure shock. And, he decided, horror.

“That's not the
worst
case these days,” she said pointedly. “Do you think we should contact the local health department to get tested?”

His pulse quickened, pain blossomed in his head.
What if I slept around and just haven't found those memories yet? I could have given her something bad. Something deadly.

“Harley. Breathe. Relax. Let it go. I'm sure the condoms were fine. I'm not terribly experienced in these matters, but we'd have known, right? I overreacted. I'm sorry.”

But what if…

Suddenly, the answer came to him. At least he hoped it was a real memory. He'd had a checkup before going to Missouri. He'd wanted a clean bill of health before he settled down to be a publisher and married man.

“I…it's okay…I saw a doctor last September. Right before I…decided to take a cross-country trip on a motorcycle. Honest.” He held up his hand. “No diseases of any kind, but you still might be pregnant.”

She'd just let go a long sigh then suddenly froze. “What do you mean?”

“Early morning. First light. Not quite awake…”

Her eyes grew large, and her mouth dropped open.

The vet chose that minute to step out of the examination room—without Sarge. He addressed them both. “Sarge is going to be fine, but there's a tender spot in his tummy, and I'd like to make sure his spleen is okay. Can I keep him over the weekend?”

“Sure,” Andi answered, scooting past Jonathan without touching him. “Call the bordello when—”

Jonathan interrupted her. “We may have met at the Rocking M, but my memory isn't too good,” he said, shaking the man's hand. “I'm Jonathan Newhall. I'm staying at the Mountain Comfort Inn at the moment, but I'll call Monday to see how he's doing.”

After they exchanged polite chitchat, Jonathan gave the clerk his credit card and signed on the dotted line. He could sense Andi's impatience, but he wasn't sure if she was in a hurry to get to the ranch or to finish their conversation.

“Thank you,” he called as he followed Andi out the door. “Take good care of our boy.”

To his surprise, they drove to the Rocking M without speaking. But as soon as he reached the first set of cattle guards, Jonathan made a decision. He pulled off the road and parked.

“Harley, I have to hurry. Jen's expecting me…”

“This will just take a minute. We need to get something settled.”

The morning sun made the highlights in her hair sparkle. There was a glow about her that shouted life and vitality. But her green eyes looked wary. “What?”

He took the plunge. “I love you.”

She looked speechless. When she tried to talk, words tumbled out. “I…you…probably safe time…never regular like Jenny, but…really?”

He waited to see if any more words were coming, then he answered what appeared to be the only question. “Yes, really.”

“You're not just saying that because we slept together and there's a minute chance I might be pregnant?”

He shook his head.

She took a deep breath then let it out. “I don't believe
you. I know you're attracted to me, the feeling is mutual. And you're too good a man not to care for me. And granted, we're amazing together in bed. But love? I don't think so.”

Her logic reminded him of someone from his past, but he couldn't risk a headache by thinking too hard. “I could prove it to you.”

“How?”

“I don't know exactly. But I'll do whatever it takes.”

She didn't break eye contact with him, so he knew she was both skeptical and intrigued. A heartbeat later, she said, “Well, unless you can accomplish that in five minutes, I'm going to be late for my sister's wedding rehearsal. And she'll kill me, so it'll become a moot point.

“Step on the gas. Now.”

 

“A
NDI
, thank God,” Jenny cried, rushing up to the door of the truck before Andi could get it open. “Kristin and Ida will be here any minute, and I wanted time to prepare you.”

Andi lowered her feet to the graveled driveway. Her sister had flown out of the house the instant the truck approached the gated yard, practically stumbling over the newly planted primroses along the walk. “Jen, what's wrong? Are you upset that I didn't come home last night? The roads were—”

Jenny shook her head. “No, It's not that. Or Rosemarie—although the tow-truck driver just talked to Sam and he said she's not worth saving.”

“Oh, no,” Andi cried. “What will I tell Ida Jane?”

Jenny waved her arm as if the prospect of telling Ida Jane that her beloved car was history was immaterial. “Jenny, what the heck is wrong with you?”

Her sister stomped her foot. She looked at Jonathan, who'd joined them. “I'm trying to
explain.
Kristin came
home last night. I'd called her on her cell phone after you phoned, so she'd know that Mrs. McCloskey was staying with Ida until she got there. She said she was bringing along a surprise.

“Then Ida Jane called half an hour later. And, Andi, she wasn't making any sense. I thought she'd had a stroke or was flipping out.” She paused dramatically. “She told me that Kristin had brought her little boy to visit.”

Andi stopped breathing. An odd pressure built in her sinuses and moisture welled in her eyes. “Her what?”

“Her son. Andi, Kristin has a child. And she never told us.”

Jenny looked close to tears, too. Andi inhaled and swallowed the lump in her throat. “For real?”

Jenny nodded, sniffling. Then suddenly they were in each other's arms, weeping. Andi didn't know why she was crying. A child was a good thing. But keeping a baby a secret from your family? How could Kris have done that? Why would she?

When they broke apart a few seconds later, Jonathan was still there, a look of sympathy on his face. Andi took his hand, grateful for his concern. With her free hand, she wiped her eyes and faced her sister. “What did she tell you? When? How old is he? Where's the father?”

Jenny shook her head. “She said she'd explain everything today. That she wanted to introduce him to us in person. And that last night, she wanted him to spend time getting to know Ida Jane.”

Andi was overwhelmed. Life seemed totally out of control. One sister was getting married the next day. Her other sister showed up for the wedding with a child in tow. And Andi had a little secret of her own. She was in love.

She decided this wasn't the time to break the news about
Jonathan. There would be time after the wedding—if he was serious. If he stayed in Gold Creek. If he really did love her.

That terrifying, amazing, tantalizing thought was cut short when Kristin's compact station wagon pulled into the yard and parked a few feet away. Andi counted heads. Just two that she could see—Kris and Ida Jane.

Kristin jumped out and hurried around to help their aunt. Neither Andi nor Jenny seemed capable of movement. Andi still hadn't let go of Jonathan's hand.

Ida took a few minutes to collect her purse and cane then she started toward them. Jenny responded by dashing to her side to provide a little extra assistance. Just as they started to walk toward the house, the rear passenger-side door opened and a boy—about 10 years old—unfolded lanky legs clad in sloppy black pants and stood up.

“Holy sh….”

Jonathan pulled her close, whispering something gentle and reassuring in her hair. His support helped her regain her composure. This child was her nephew. Kristin's son.

“This is gonna get messy,” she whispered.

Jonathan flicked his finger under her chin and gave her a smile. “Life always is.”

“But…” she tried to explain.

He shifted his eyes so she would look to her left. Kristin and the boy were standing a foot away.

Kris's hand rested protectively on her son's narrow shoulder. She said, “Zach, love, this is your Aunt Andrea. Everybody calls her Andi.”

The boy kept his gaze on the ground. His white-blond hair was cut razor close around his neck and halfway up his skull, but the long upper locks hung in messy disarray over his high forehead. He was Kristin's clone without any of her bright, soft cuddliness.

“Zach? As in Zachary?”

“Zachariah,” Kris answered. “It means the Lord's remembrance.”

The boy made a disparaging sound, but no words materialized from his lips.

“It's nice to meet you, Zach,” Andi said, mouthing the word
finally
to her sister. “This is Jonathan. Some people call him Harley, but his real name is Jonathan. And that's the name he wants to use.” He'd made it clear at the vet's office.

Jenny returned from helping Ida Jane inside, and Andi saw the look of surprise her sisters exchanged at her announcement. Jonathan let go of her hand to put it out in greeting. The boy looked up but didn't shake hands. Although his bangs made it hard to see his face clearly, one thing was evident. Instead of Kris's China blue eyes, her son's were midnight black and filled with silent anger.

“Welcome to Gold Creek,” Jonathan said.

“It's a sucky town. I'm not gonna move here. I'm going to stay in Ashland even if I have to live with my friends.”

His small, pointed chin lifted defiantly. For the first time, Andi saw the unusual shape of his eyes—almond and slightly tilted at the corners. Ringed with thick dark lashes, they would have been beautiful if not for the angry squint.

A familiar expression. Andi inhaled sharply and stepped back before she could shout out the name that came to mind.

The boy looked her way. His distinctive eyes narrowed. “You don't look like my mom. She's pretty.”

He faced his mother. “I thought you were triplets. But that one's tall.” He nodded at Jenny, who hadn't even been properly introduced. “And she has red hair.” He pointed at Andi. His handsome youthful features—which some day soon would make silly girls do things they'd later regret—contorted in contempt. “So, was that a lie, too?”

 

S
AM MANAGED
to diffuse the situation with such aplomb, Andi watched in awe as he escorted Zach toward the barn to view a newborn foal. He'd appeared just moments after Zach dropped the nasty question that had made his mother burst into tears and Jenny wrap her in a protective hug.

At Sam's invitation, Jonathan had joined them, but Andi sensed he was reluctant to leave. She'd encouraged him with a tiny nod that had earned her a smile before he walked away.

When they were out of earshot, Andi closed the distance between her and her sisters and said, “So, let's hear it. He's Tyler's, isn't he?”

“Yes,” Kristin admitted tearfully.

Jenny's mouth formed a perfect O. “You got pregnant that night?” she exclaimed. “That one night? No way.”

Kristin kept her gaze on her shoes, so Andi couldn't see her expression. Couldn't tell whether there'd been other times. Did it matter? Andi had started dating Tyler after the winter ball in January. She seldom attended formal dances, but going with Ty Harrison—the town's bad boy—had been something of a coup. They'd dated until the triplets' eighteenth birthday in late February—when all hell had broken loose.

“Does he know?” Andi asked.

Kris shook her head miserably. “You always told me the only way to keep a secret in a small town is to tell no one.”

Jenny had that hurt look on her face again. “Even your sisters? How could you?” Her eyebrows knitted. “I bet Moira knows about him. All of the Irish cousins know, don't they?”

Andi had never understood her sister's antipathy toward their cousin, Moira, who was their age. Kristin had lived with Moira and her younger sister, Kathleen, in Michigan,
after spending a year with the family in Ireland. She'd left home right out of high school—for one very obvious reason.

“They would have been the ones to help her, Jen, since we weren't there for her,” she said, putting her arm around Kristin's shoulder supportively.

“We could have helped. She didn't give us a chance.”

True, but too late to make a difference.
“She's home now. We'll have the rest of her life to bug her about this. Right now, we have to make up for some lost years. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that boy doesn't seem too enthused by the prospect of a ready-made family.”

Kristin took a breath and leaned her head on Andi's shoulder. Andi couldn't begin to guess when last that had happened. “I don't know what went wrong. He was such a sweet kid—absolutely perfect, until about a year ago. Then he changed. Hormones, friends, who knows? But it was around the time when I started coming down here to help with Ida Jane.”