Without You I Have Nothing (55 page)

BOOK: Without You I Have Nothing
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Peter signed their
names on the register as Mr. and Mrs. Peter O'Brien.

Jennifer thought she
would never forget the thrill of seeing their names linked together like that
for the very first time.

The room-boy escorted
them to their room with their luggage on a trolley and accepted Peter's tip
with a cheeky grin as he left. The click of the door brought a sudden chill. Peter
was alone with Jennifer - now his wife.

The first day of
forever had started.

There was an awkward
moment of profound silence after Peter closed the door.

They smiled nervously
at each other as Peter lifted a hand and softly stroked the side of Jennifer's
face.

With head down and
hands clasped before her, she waited, feeling a sudden chill of apprehension.

He voiced his
innermost thoughts. "Right now, I feel like the luckiest man alive. I
never dreamed that I would meet and marry someone as beautiful as you.”  Then
he leaned down and tilted her chin in his hand, bending lower to give her the
sweetest kiss that she had ever experienced.

Her mind was waging a
battle between excitement and nervousness. Until now, this battle had been
pretty even, but suddenly the scales tipped decidedly in favor of excitement.

"Mrs. O'Brien, I
love you.”  Softly he breathed the words and she lifted her head while he
gently kissed her forehead.

Her soft answer,
"I love you Mr. O'Brien,” was all the answer Peter needed to hear.

Laughing, he broke
the awkward silence. "I'm starving."  The wedding breakfast had been
superb but Peter's thoughts hadn't been on the food.

Relaxing, Jennifer
beamed. "No wonder, all you did was pick,” she giggled, "and kiss me."

"You didn't eat
much yourself. It's still early, so would you like to eat out, eat here or…,
well, any suggestion?"

"Have something
sent up. I'm famished and I'm suddenly very tired. My morning started at
sunrise I'm sure and,” she giggled, "I was rather busy making myself
beautiful for a date in a church. Then I met a most handsome man in the church
and I married him."

She was laughing, but
both of them were apprehensive about what lay ahead.

As Peter picked up
the phone to put through the order, he knew how desperately he wanted to make
love with Jennifer but he pushed the thought aside for the moment, unwilling to
hurry Jennifer and lose the magic of this moment.

They sat opposite
each other in the room and ate their chicken and beef satays with vegetable
samosas, toasting each other with the carefully selected champagne Peter had
ordered. As they talked of the day, the little they could recall surprised
them.

Finally, there was
nothing left to either eat or drink and they had nothing left to discuss.

Again, Jennifer could
not look Peter in the face. Her thoughts of what to expect troubled her.

"Stand up,”
Peter said with mock severity.

She quivered as she
stood head still down.

"You can't sleep
in your jewelry. What would Santa say?"

She giggled, but
quickly became serious as Peter kissed the pendant from her throat and the
earrings from her ears. When she began to tremble, Peter calmed her.

"Don't be
frightened Jennifer, I love you.”  He bent to kiss her yet again.

As they broke their
kiss, Jennifer cleared her throat.

"Just give me a
couple of minutes."

She'd already decided
she wouldn't allow Peter to undress her. Instead, she opened her suitcase, took
out her negligee and fled to the bathroom.

With the bathroom
door locked behind her, Jennifer gave way to her tears. Her body had betrayed
her on this of all days. She had realized her body's weakness when she changed
into her 'going away' clothes at the reception and had taken precautions. Now
she knew her worst fears had been realized.

Her mind was in
torment as she questioned why had this happened to her. Tonight of all nights,
she didn't want this to happen!  She knew that Peter would want to make love
with her and she admitted she wanted him so badly. Her body ached for him and
yet she could not give in to those wants. She couldn't.

Jennifer suspected
that he'd be disappointed and angry and blame her, but she knew it wasn't her
fault. She hadn't planned for this to happen.

‘Why, why, why had
this happened now?  I want to make love with him so much, but I can’t. I
won’t.’  Then her thoughts cleared as she realized that she'd soon find out
whether Peter's generosity with material things also extended to his love for
her.

Slowly she unzipped
her dress and pulled it off in one move, then slid her panties down her legs
and unhooked her bra. Her mind was in such torment it was a wonder that she was
able to change at all with her hands shaking as much as they were.

Jennifer slipped the
negligee over her head and down over her naked body. She looked at herself in
the bathroom mirror.

It was the most
beautiful negligee that she had ever owned.

Trying to clear her
mind of all her fears, she remembered her mother had given it to her, along
with the many nervous jokes from everyone else at her bridal shower.

Peter's flattery
aside, Jennifer knew she wasn't a stunning beauty. Her eyes caught the glint of
her wedding ring and her heart beat at an even madder pace. She fussed with her
hair, trying to make herself as alluring as possible then switched off the
light and took a deep breath.

With her hand on the
door lock, she stood in thought.

"Well, I can't
put off the evil moment forever,” she said to herself.

She unlocked the
door.

Desperately Peter
fought the desire to grab, but deep down he knew he had to tread warily if
their honeymoon was to be a treasured memory.

It took Jennifer's
eyes a second to adjust to the dim light.

Peter had draped his
shirt over the single desk lamp and the room had a soft romantic glow. He had
also turned the sheets down and was standing alongside the bed, wearing what
looked to be a light blue robe. His huge frame filled out the robe better than
any model Jennifer had seen in any catalogue.

Somehow, the sight
made her start walking towards her new husband. That movement across the carpeted
floor seemed as long as any marathon in history. She felt the negligee as it
brushed her bare skin hidden beneath it.

Peter watched her
approach with wide eyes. As she noticed his expression, Jennifer had a quick
thought that his heart was probably pounding just as hard as hers - if not
harder!

As she neared him, he
held his arms out to her and smiled.

"Mrs. O'Brien,
you are the loveliest woman I have ever seen."

She halted in front
of him, placing her hands on his arms and running them to his broad shoulders. "And
you, Mr. O'Brien, are the most handsome husband that any girl could ever
expect."

Jennifer felt Peter
slip his hands around her waist and pull her towards him. Her hands moved from
his shoulders to around his neck as he leaned down to kiss her. The feeling, as
her new husband held and kissed her, while wearing so scandalously little was
indeed intoxicating.

Their lips parted and
their tongues glided against each other's, tentatively. She felt Peter's grip
around her body tighten and he drew her harder against his firm body.

Their kiss deepened
and a soft moan escaped Jennifer's lips. Peter's mouth swallowed the sound. His
mouth was driving her wilder with excitement with each passing moment. She felt
his hands moving over her back, trying to explore her like a new toy for the
first time. Her nipples - not covered by a bra - hardened as her breasts
flattened against his powerful chest. Their lips ground against each other's
more and more desperately.

She didn't want this
moment to ever end.

Suddenly she became
all too aware of something protruding into her belly. Peter's manhood had come
to full attention and was jutting out from between the flaps of his robe. She
could feel its heat through the thin silk and she pressed her lower body
tighter against him in an effort to feel it more clearly.

Desperately Peter
fought his desire. Deep down he knew he had to take things slowly.

She had moved into
Peter's arms and didn't struggle as he carried her to their bed.

The moment he lay
beside her and turned her into his throbbing body, her mind returned to the
awful thought that she had to refuse him. Hiding her face in his shoulder
Jennifer began weeping.

"Please Peter. I
can't.”  Piteously, she lifted her eyes and sobbed, "I'm sorry. My period
has started."

"Good Lord!” 
Peter held her very close, pulling her face against his chest. Although shocked
by the sudden turn of events, he desperately tried to make light of her
admission.

"Is that why
you're crying?  I thought it was something serious."

Jennifer could hardly
believe her ears. Leaning back from his arms she stared deep into his eyes
through her tears. She tried to reconcile what she knew to be his bitter
disappointment with the words he'd just spoken.

Peter rolled her onto
her back and stared into her eyes.

"Jennifer, why
are you so worried when I feel so relieved?”  A chuckle rose from deep within
his chest and Jennifer's tears stopped, as she looked even more perplexed.

"All day I've
been worrying that you were only marrying me for my body.”  Peter joked,
rejecting the sad feeling of refusal as it struggled to gain strength. "I'm
more than a sex object you know. I've been terrified you'd want to play with my
body all night and not allow me any sleep."

Tittering, she rolled
against Peter so close that every curve of her delightful body, holding promise
of such pleasure, fitted into Peter. Gently he ran his hands over her negligee,
exploring her body so softly and so carefully so as not to arouse her or worry
her. He restrained his exploration to her back and shoulders.

Suddenly he rolled
onto his back and shouted at the ceiling.

"Dear Dorothy
Dix, what the hell do I do now?"

He felt a pillow biff
him and he wrestled Jennifer until she lay beneath him. He stroked her face
until her laughter ceased. "Still worried?” he enquired.

She shook her head. "No."

"How do you
feel, Mrs. O'Brien?"

"I feel good,”
she replied.

"Can I have a
feel to check?"

Jennifer gurgled. "Oh
no, you don't!  Didn't you hear what I said?”  Pulling Peter's head to her
shoulder, she lay quietly, stroking his cheek.

Against her neck, he
murmured softly, close to her ear. "Tomorrow you'll be in a new country. While
you're there you might find the girls at work were correct about your honeymoon
being a study tour of bedroom ceilings."

The tension was
broken.

Their sleep was
fitful - little catnaps snatched between whisperings, lots of kissing and
becoming accustomed to each other's bodies and the noises they made. All night
Peter was painfully aware that Jennifer's softness was calling him. Her
femininity drugged him and he wondered whether she knew.

Jennifer lay there,
eyes closed, amazed at Peter's reaction to the bad news. She could feel his
'maleness', his 'boy's germs' as Andrew and she called them when children. He
felt so hard and so, well, delicious she could feel herself reaching out to
entice him.

'But I can't,' she
thought. 'I won't, I want it to be unique not spoilt by anything, as there can
be no repetition. The first time must be special. I can't. I won’t.’  The
thoughts hammered into her consciousness.

"Are you
showering with me this morning, Mrs. O'Brien?”  Lightly Peter kissed her
eyelids open.

"No, I’m
definitely not. There wouldn't be room under the shower for the three of us,”
she added pushing him to the floor.

Later in the
afternoon, at the airport, Eric, Elizabeth and Andrew were waiting when Peter
and Jennifer arrived. They hugged the newlyweds and talked so much that
strangers must have thought the young couple had been away for years.

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