Wolves at the Door (17 page)

“You’re really pretty and he’s a guy. Can’t blame him, right?” I forced a smile, waiting for her to step aside so I could get in my car.

“There’s nothing going on between us. I swear. I’m engaged and even if I wasn’t, Zack doesn’t interest me in that way. Besides, I could never crush on a guy who has a girlfriend.” She rested a hand on my arm, her eyes pleading.

“That’s no longer an issue.” I sighed, shaking my head as tears burned the back of my throat. It felt like we’d broken up for real. “It doesn’t matter. I like him a lot, but things were easier when we were just friends. This isn’t your fault. Really.” As if the whole thing wasn’t traumatic enough, now I had to console the girl who’d broken us up.

“Okay. But it’s a shame, that’s all,” she said. “He obviously cares about you.”

“The real shame is starting something we shouldn’t have. I need to go.” I nodded pointedly toward my car door.

“Oh, sorry.” She moved aside. “Well, I guess I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah. ’Bye.” I flung the car door open, scrambled in and peeled out of the parking lot.

When my car hugged the curb outside my house, my fingers still trembled on the steering wheel. As if in a trance, I let myself in through the front door, hung up my coat and keys, then sat on the couch and stared at the wall.

Should I wait for him to call or should I just show up in his room?

Are you okay?
Zack asked me from wherever he was.

Not really. You?

Trevor and Maya are taking it hard. Trevor thinks you’re being hormonal. Says you’ll calm down if I give you some space. But Maya isn’t speaking to me anymore. Right this second, she’s demanding that Trevor spend the rest of the evening talking some sense into me
.

It didn’t slip my notice that he hadn’t answered my question. I’d asked about
him
, not Trevor or Maya. Wasn’t he freaked out at all?
I hope they don’t start having problems because of us
.

Me too. I really don’t like lying to them this way
.

Was that all that bothered Zack?
He wasn’t the one who had to do the dirty work and upset his friends by acting like a jealous psycho.
It’s good practice for lying to your mom and Cara
.

Yeah, but we don’t have to deal with that tonight. Man, I’m not looking forward to tomorrow.

What about tonight? Was he looking forward to me sneaking into his room or did he not care anymore?
Me neither.

It’ll be interesting to see what happens when all the guys at school realize you’re on the market again
, Zack said.
And when I say interesting, what I really mean is annoying. Are you coming over?

I wanted to let him stew in it since the whole unpleasant thing had been his idea. But I couldn’t. I needed to see him.
When do you want me?
Seconds later, his answer still hadn’t come.
Zack?

My head swam with pain and a hint of nausea crept up my th
roat at how real our fake breakup felt. To distract myself, I darted upstairs to take a shower.

It wasn’t just Zack that upset me, but Maya too. She’d interrogate me tomorrow and once the news spread through school, everyone would be whispering. Gina would gloat, of course.

Sorry,
Zack said, while I was scrubbing with suds in my hair.
Maya was saying good-bye to Trevor, but she had to scold me first. We’re heading home now. Let me know when you’re on your way
.

I will
. I closed my eyes and the warm water rolled over my face, rushing past the threatening tears.

Breakups sucked.

~~~

Chapter Fifteen

The next morning, I woke to Zack’s lips nuzzling my neck. My eyes fluttered open and I met his gaze with a sleepy smile.

Today, everyone finds out about the breakup
, he said.
And then we’ll meet here tonight, right?

My smile faded. It would be more than twelve hours from now before I could be alone with him again.

Just remember it’s not real
. Zack’s fingertips caressed my skin as he swept up a lock of my hair and gently moved it away from my face.
We’ll be fine.

The bed creaked as he rolled over on me, hooking a hand under my thigh. My greedy fingers hungrily sought his bare skin and raced up his back, pulling him closer. Our lips touched and he released a shaky breath, then he growled and rolled off me.
You’d better go before we’re too weak to move.

And that was a bad thing? Oh, right. Of course it was. I shook my head and the Zack-induced lust-trance began to fade. Not all the way though. Forcing myself out of his bed, I muttered a quick
good-bye, morphed into a tabby cat and scurried out his window.

† † †

Once I found a parking spot at school, I dialed Maya’s number. After my fake spat with Zack at the café, she had to be dying for the scoop. Maybe even crazy-worried about me. I’d been too wrapped up reminding myself the fight wasn’t real that I’d completely neglected calling my best friend. I should’ve let her know I was okay. Some BFF I was.

She picked up after one ring. “Hey, Autumn! Where’ve you been?”

“Home. I needed to be alone. I’m sorry for not calling you.” The lie stung but I knew I had no choice. “Just got to school.”

“We can talk in a minute. Zack’s about to pull in now.”

Of course. Now that he wasn’t driving around with me in my Mustang, he had to repossess his Jeep that he’d let Trevor use. Maya and Trevor got to drive with Zack, but I couldn’t. A pang of sadness just about swallowed me whole. Only a few hours and I’d be with him again. I could do this.
Zack, what did you tell Maya?

I told her you were fine and she didn’t need to worry. That we talked on the phone last night and agreed to be friends
.

And she bought that?
Just then, I spotted the old, red Jeep rounding a row of cars.

She will when you confirm it.
Zack turned away from his passengers to shoot me a smile as he slid the Jeep between a car and the chain link fence.

I gave him a half smile, feeling a little awkward and uncertain. How were people supposed to act as only friends after being so intimate just th
at morning?

Maya
strode ahead of Trevor and Zack and ushered me into the ladies’ room without giving me a chance to say a word to Zack. She ducked to check under the stalls for feet, before grasping my arms. “I called you a million times yesterday. What happened? How are you?”

I dug in
to my purse for my cell and scanned the missed calls. The last four were from her last night. “Oh. I forgot my phone in the car, then stuck it in my purse this morning without looking at it.”

“Seriously?” Maya gave my arms a gentle shake. “You broke up with Zack. I’ve been worried out of my mind.”

“I’m sorry.”  It seemed backwards to be apologizing to her when I was the one who’d just lost my boyfriend.

“Thought you really liked him.” She exhaled noisily. “Why don’t you look upset?”

“Numb, I guess.” I shrugged and checked my face in the mirror, even though I knew it didn’t need anything. “Him dancing with Gina was too much. Then Alura last night. I can’t do that again, be with a guy who isn’t totally into me. You know?”

“Yeah, but he
was
totally into you.” Maya tilted her head. “I was so sure of it.”

“Maybe things were getting too serious and he got scared. Whatever. I’m actually relieved.” I gave her a smile, which was a million times brighter than my mood. I really hated lying to my best friend.

Maya rolled her eyes. “So long as he doesn’t start dating Gina, I’ll deal.”

I shrugged. “He’s not my problem anymore. Let’s get to class,” I said before I gave in and spilled the whole scheme to Maya.

† † †

John snuck peeks at me during fourth period like he knew something was up, but when the bell rang, he said
good-bye and rushed off to meet Janine for lunch. Thankfully, he wouldn’t be interrogating me about Zack.

At the entrance to the cafeteria, I quickly located Maya sitting with Zack and Trevor. I wanted to sit with them, but anyone else who knew we’d broken up would get confused if I sat at
his table. I compromised and sat on the other side of Maya where I had only a partial view of my “ex.”

I was about to say hello to him, but lost my chance when Maya asked me about my
after-school plans. Maybe she’d noticed how uncomfortable I looked and was trying to distract me. A couple minutes later, though, Trevor captured her attention and I was back to feeling the awkward silence. 

How’s it going?
Zack asked the second Maya turned to her boyfriend.

I took a bite of my sandwich since we could easily talk telepathically with our mouths full.
Okay. And you?

Just fine. You did a good job with Maya, huh? You were pretty convincing
.

Of course he would’ve been listening to Maya and me in the bathroom earlier. But why did he seem irritated with me? I did exactly what he’d asked me to do. It was the
right
thing to do to keep us safe — what
he
wanted. I glanced at him and he looked up from his sloppy joe, zero emotion on his face except…  was it just my imagination or was there a hint of the old Zack who had thought so little of me when we’d first met?

Isn’t that what you wanted?
I asked.

Yes, but...

What?

It’s a little scary, that’s all. You’re very good at lying
. He took a sip of his juice, then set it back down as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

Zack was right. I’d been very persuasive in getting Maya to believe me, but demonstrating Zack’s unworthiness hadn’t been difficult since he
had
danced with Gina and he
had
been looking at drop-dead gorgeous Alura.

Our lives are at stake, Zack. Would you have been happier if I’d done a crappy job?

Never mind. I’m sorry I brought it up
. He stared at the food in his hands.

Sorry because he regretted ever getting involved with me? Or sorry he was being such a jerk? Acting like I was upset with Zack wouldn’t be so hard after all.

I had no business sitting with him, which only made it all so much more uncomfortable. I gripped my food tray.
Maybe I’ll sit with John and Janine
.

He’d already taken another bite of his sloppy joe without looking at me.
It’d be more convincing, wouldn’t it?

Ouch.

“I’ll see you later, Maya,” I told her and walked away.

When I sat my tray next to John, across from Janine, all eyes at the table were fixed on me.

“Hi.” John stared at me cautiously, like he was bursting with curiosity, but didn’t want to upset me.

“Hi.” I gave him a weak smile — it was all I could muster.

“What’s up?” Ashley asked.

“Zack and I broke up. We agreed to be friends, but it felt a little weird over there.”

Trying not to notice their shocked faces, I took another bite of my sandwich. After a long silence, I set my food down and looked at John, then Janine and Ashley. “What’s the big deal? People break up all the time.”

“Well, yeah,” Ashley said, setting down her fork too carefully. “But we weren’t expecting it from you and Zack. You seemed so happy.”

I sighed, not wanting to go through all the details. I mean, geez, I wouldn’t want to upset Zack by lying too well, did I? “We were, until he danced with Gina at prom. Didn’t any of you see that?”

“He danced with Gina? Are you kidding?” Janine scowled. “What a creep.”

“And last night, we went out for coffee and there was this girl there.” I looked at each of them. “You know that girl who was sitting at our table on prom night?”