Words Heard in Silence (71 page)

Rebecca laughed, nearly losing her tea. "And you call me crazed." She paused, wiping the edge of her mouth with a napkin. "My dear, Charlie and Richard would just die if they knew the things we talked about when they are not around."

Elizabeth’s tone was somewhat resigned. "Richard would probably love it. He is such a salacious old wretch."

"Good for Richard. Charlie on the other hand is very shy about these subjects, which is understandable, given the situation. If he had any idea I talked to even you about these things he would find the nearest rock to crawl under."

"Fortunately for you, he does not seem to suffer from the same hesitation or shyness with you." Elizabeth thought for a moment. "You know, I suspect it is not that he is shy about intimacy, but rather he is in the habit of privacy to keep his secret safe. Once he knows it is, I believe he is quite open and forthcoming. I do know he and Whitman talk about things regularly. A sort of odd masculine friendship, there."

"That is an understatement. I am glad there is someone he is comfortable talking with."

"Rebecca, Charlie has few friends, but those he does have he is very open with. I am proud to count myself one of them, actually. Oh, and he did tell me about your little…… problem that first night he went drinking with Whitman."

"Seems you are the Mother Confessor for the Redmond family." Rebecca smiled into her teacup. "How was I supposed to know everything was all right?"

"My dear, how was Charlie supposed to know you were not asleep?" Elizabeth grinned, and then added, "Well, with you two, I certainly have added to my own education. Some of the drawings in my medical books make far more sense after having talked with the two of you." Elizabeth could no longer stifle the giggles that had been threatening for a while.

"Thank you so very much, Doctor. It is nice to know we are a part of your continuing education." Rebecca poured Elizabeth more tea.

"My pleasure, I assure you. And I am very appreciative of the trust you have both given me."

"Of course, you are one of Charlie's dearest friends." She looked out the window as a blue uniform rode by. She simply could not help herself. "I will be very glad when he comes home."

"I am sure you will, dear. I rather suspect he will be very glad to get home. And Rebecca, I hope you know I am also your friend."

"I do know, dear Elizabeth." Rebecca sighed quietly then gave Elizabeth a very serious look. "He is going to see his friend, Mrs. Armstrong while he is there."

"Oh, did he say so? I would imagine he would want to tell her of his impending marriage to you personally. They were reputed to be rather... close... and Charlie is nothing if not a gentleman.

"Yes, he mentioned it before he left. And yes, they are very close."

"Rebecca, dear, I hope you are not worried about him seeing her. I know Charlie. He is devoted to you."

"Oh, I am sure of that, but well, they do have a relationship. He is very fond of her. We are not married yet so I really could not protest if he does pay her a social call."

"Rebecca, you are not suggesting...?"

"Well, I hope not, but I suppose anything is possible. I have heard the men talk of Mrs. Armstrong. I know she is an attractive woman and she is probably more, shall we say, adept at giving Charlie what he needs."

"Rebecca Gaines. You put that idea right out of your head. Charlie is committed to you. I would imagine the only thing that will go on between them is an honest conversation in which Charlie tells her he is no longer available." Elizabeth had a bemused look on her face. "Besides, he is so charming when he wants to be, he will probably enroll her in assisting him with the shopping; one cannot accuse General Redmond of being particularly skilled in selecting ribbon, lace, fabric, and threads."

"He did look like a startled rabbit when I gave him the list." Rebecca smiled at her friend. "Please believe me, Elizabeth, when I tell you that even if Charlie does spend time with Mrs. Armstrong, I love him and I will not hold it against him. Charlie for all purposes is a man and that is what men do."

"No, my dear, you are wrong there. In this matter, in the matters of the heart, of love and commitment, Charlie is still, and always will be, a woman. And for our Charlie, there is now only one person who has access to his body –– the one who holds his heart and soul."

"Thank you."

"You are still worried, are you not, my dear?"

"I am afraid I have many ghosts in my own past that make me uncomfortable at times."

"Well, dear, if I were you, I would simply ask Charlie when he comes back. I am sure he will tell you the truth."

Rebecca chuckled. "There are some things I would rather not know."

Elizabeth looked at her friend and then started laughing. "You really do not want to give the boy an inch of slack, do you? You will worry he may sleep with her and it will always nag at you. But you will not ask him, and I suspect, in your heart, even if he swore on a stack of Bibles that he had not dallied with her, you would always have doubts."

"And in the words of my mother, who was by the way, a very wise woman, when it comes to the ways of gentlemen, which you do not understand, ignorance is bliss."

"Perhaps, my dear, but for you to always doubt Charlie –– even a little, will put a burden on your relationship that is probably not a good thing."

"Elizabeth, I do not doubt Charlie; I know he loves me. I know he wants to come here and make a life together. I certainly will not let his relationship with Mrs. Armstrong come between us. Regardless of what that relationship may be."

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows. She clearly knew Charlie and his sense of honor, better than Rebecca did. "Rebecca, I think this is important. Given who Charlie is, there is no possibility Charlie will allow anything other than friendship to continue with Lizzie Armstrong. She will, no doubt, have the same status of close personal friend I am honored with. Unfortunately, trying to convince you of this truth about our mutual friend is beyond me today." With a frustrated laugh, Elizabeth went on. "Drat. Why should I expect to be able to alleviate your concerns? I have been unsuccessful at everything else toda."

"Elizabeth, you are a good friend my dear, but there are just some things beyond your help. My personal insecurities are among them."

The two women sat in silence, each drinking their tea and ruminating on the frustrations of the day. A somber quiet filled the room, broken only when young Em came galloping into the room crying "Mamma ‘‘Becca. Mamma ‘‘Becca. See Em’s new clothes. Look, Mamma ‘‘Becca." Lizbet had made the little girl’s doll a new outfit from scraps. The two women became occupied with praising the child and her doll. The afternoon’s worries slid into the background.

C
harlie left Lizzie’s with a light heart and vision of a loving future in his head. It was late afternoon, that hazy time between day and night. He walked back toward the Willard, past the homes and boarding houses that had grown up around the Capitol building, across the Mall that would remain pristine and green in the center of this growing city, past the small shops that had sprung up along Constitution Avenue. As he strolled, he glanced in the windows of those shops, on the odd chance that the perfect gift for Rebecca would present itself.

Instead, he found something entirely unexpected. There in the window was a doll. A wonderful doll. A doll with green eyes and hair the color of red gold. The perfect doll for Em. He looked at the time and realized it was a bit late for most merchants. Trying the door, he was disappointed; it was locked. But that doll was perfect for little Em. And the child had so little to call her own. He tapped on the door.

A wizen, gray haired man wearing shirt, vest, and a leather apron shuffled to the door and opened it. "I am sorry, sir, I have closed for the evening. I was just cleaning up when you knocked. Could you come back tomorrow?"

"I do appreciate your answering my knock then, sir. I am afraid I am leaving on a train at first light tomorrow. I saw the doll in the window and it is perfect for a little girl I know. She has very little; the war has taken most of the comforts of home and family from her. Could I just purchase the doll? Please?"

The old merchant looked at the man standing before him. A General, obviously a man of means from the quality of the material in his cloak. A man who would take the time to try and obtain a doll for a war refugee. Well, if the General could take the time, so could he. "Yes, sir, I think I can do that. Come in, and I will wrap it for you. I must confess, it is a rather expensive doll."

"That does not matter. It is a perfect doll for little Em."

With his pocket lighter by a ten-dollar golden eagle and his arm full of a carefully wrapped package, Charlie returned to the Willard. There he took a simple meal, and went early to bed, where he tossed for most of the night, missing Rebecca’s tender touch.

E
arly the next morning, after having booked the finest suite at the Willard for the end of January and the early part of February, Charlie took a hackney cab back to Union Station and headed home. Most of his purchases were being shipped in the express carriage of the train. The gift from Lizzie was carefully tucked in his personal bag, as was the doll for Em. The papers from the attorney and the bank, along with the three precious rings, were stowed in the inside breast pocket of his coat. At his urging, the engineer made record time returning to Culpeper.

Beulah entered the parlor with a smile. "Miss Rebecca?"

"Yes?"

"Reg just stopped by to say that General Redmond is on his way home. He should be coming down the road anytime now."

"Wonderful!" She practically jumped from her chair, grabbing her shawl as she made her way to the front door. Pulling it open, she took her place on the porch and waited for Charlie, like a good wife-to-be should. A huge smile broke across her face and she waved at him when he came into view.

Smiling, he threw himself off Jack's back, and tossed the reins to Reg, who had come running around the house as soon as he heard the hoof beats. "Reg, take my saddlebags up to the bedroom and make sure Jack gets special treatment. Duncan should be coming along shortly with a cart full of things for Miss Rebecca, so hurry back to help him unload." He turned to Rebecca and almost shyly said, "hello, dear one. I have missed you."

She put her arms around his neck, her heart hammering in her ears as she kissed him on the cheek. "And I have missed you," she whispered in his ear, "and if I do not get you inside, your stock with the men will triple its value."

"Darling, I am filthy. Every inch of my body is coated with half dust and soot from the rail bed between here and Washington."

"Then I shall take you upstairs and wash every inch of that body." She refused to let go of his arm as they walked inside.

Trying to contain the heat between them, at least until they could be alone, Charlie asked, "Do you know why Duncan rather than Jocko brought the cart and Jack to meet me

"Jocko brought a sick woman in to Elizabeth last night, and then Richard sent him on an errand. I have not seen any of the three of them since." She was stroking his arm through his coat, clinging closely to his body. Charlie's heart rate went up several notches at her possessiveness and all thought of Jocko disappeared. His time with Lizzie had certainly set his hormones to running free, and now this passionate reception from Rebecca was pushing his libido higher and higher. "Come into the back parlor, dearest."

"Of course." She smiled like the cat with the canary as they walked to the back parlor. Rebecca let Charlie go in first then she closed the doors, threw her arms around him and kissed him with all the passion she felt.

Charlie welcomed her kiss, holding her close and tight against his body, reveling in the feel of her solid, lithe frame against his own and the heat of her lips on his. Their tongues teased and caressed one another, exploring, tasting, savoring. He broke the kiss to ease her into her chair, kneeling beside her, and lavishing caresses on her neck and shoulders.

She moaned, allowing him to explore as she tugged on the buttons of his coat. "I missed you, Charlie." She began undoing the buttons as fast as she could.

"Love you so." Her hands on his body, the urgency of her touch was driving him insane. "Upstairs. Now. Please," he begged.

"Oh, yes," she managed to gasp out even as they continued to kiss, while she struggled out of the chair. It was as if they had been apart for months and not just for a few days. She had never missed someone so much in her entire life; she wanted nothing so much as to go upstairs and really make love with Charlie. Her mind considered for the briefest of moments that if it did not happen, she might die. "I want you, Charlie."

Her words went through Charlie like lightning. He could not talk. He grabbed her hand in his and pulled her through the door. The two of them rushed up the stairs, breathless and laughing at the same time. His coat, weskit, and tie came off as they passed through the sitting room. By the time they reached the bedroom, he was standing in boots, britches and shirt. His eyes were flashing silver with his need. The chances of Rebecca's dress surviving this evening were slim.

She reached up and began unbuttoning his shirt. "I have no intention of stopping tonight, Charlie. I have missed you so much." She leaned in and kissed him again as she unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it from his britches.

"Wait. Wait a minute. Let me get out of these boots." He jammed his heel in the jack and yanked his foot out of the boot, then repeated the process wit the other foot. He turned back to her. "Turn around."

She smiled and turned her back to him. Her stomach was fluttering wildly and her hands were trembling from desire and arousal. "Hurry, Charlie."