Wrangled (12 page)

Annalee laid there on my chest for a while,
breathin’ kinda heavy and makin’ little noises like a newborn kitten. “Are you
okay?” I asked.

“I’m better than okay,” she murmured.
“Cody, I never felt anything like that before.”

It was kinda an indelicate question, but
that made me wonder about her ex-husband. She had two kids, after all, and I
didn’t think she got ‘em without havin’ sex. And what she said left me
wonderin’ too about what I was supposed to say to that. I couldn’t think of
anything I thought she’d wanta hear, so I just stayed quiet.

“Cody?”

“Yeah, sweetheart?”

“I thought you went to sleep.”

“Naw, I’m just thinkin’,” I said.

“What are you thinking about?”

“You, mostly,” I answered, squeezin’ her tighter.
“You’re so beautiful, Annalee. You take my breath away.”

“You took mine away, too,” she said.

“Aw, now how’d I do that?”

“You know what an orgasm is?”

“Well, yeah. Why?”

“I didn’t. I hadn’t ever had one before we
started goin’ to the hayloft,” she said. “I had to ask Charity what I was
feeling.”

“You’re kiddin’! But, you was…”

“Married? I know. But it was never sweet
and tender like this. More what Charity called slam, bam, thank you, ma’am.
Only there were never any thanks. Especially when my husband used sex as
punishment.”

“He what? How…”

“I’ll tell you sometime. Sorry I brought it
up. I shouldn’t have spoiled this time.”

“Aw, sweetheart, you didn’t spoil nothin’.
I’ll admit I’m curious, but you don’t have to tell me nothin’ you don’t want
to.”

“Thanks, Cody. And thanks for the orgasm.”
That made me laugh.

“Well, thank you for mine,” I joked.

All of a sudden she pulled away from me and
said, “You want another one?”

“Hell, yes,” I said. “Only this time, it
won’t be so quick.”

“It was perfect, honey.” Her voice got all
dreamy, and she started tellin’ me how much she liked my hands and lips on her
nipples. Hearin’ that mighta been the hottest thing that ever happened to me,
with the possible exception of that first time with her. She rolled around
until she was cuddled up into my shoulder, and then pulled my free hand down
where she was still all hot and wet.

“Wait, sweetheart,” I said. “We cain’t use
this same rubber again. We need to get rid of it.”

Without a word, she carefully rolled it
down and tied the end, then dropped it overboard beside the bed. “I’ll get it
in a little while,” she said. Then she snuggled back into my arm and I started
strokin’ her, cuppin’ her cheek in my hand, and then draggin’ it down over her
boobs, squeezin’ one and then the other, rollin’ her nipple between my thumb
and finger. I had her squirmin’ good, and then I went back between her legs
with my hand, and found the middle of her, dippin’ my finger in and out while
she gasped my name. God, it was sweet. Mr. Johnson didn’t take no time at all
to wake up from his little nap. While I played with her, Annalee played with
me, strokin’ and squeezin’ my dick until I thought I’d die if I couldn’t put it
in her.

“Cody,” she said.

“Yeah, baby,” I answered, not sure I wanted
to start a conversation right now.

“I’ve been learning about sex. Charity got
some books and DVDs for us.”

“Oh?”

“Yes, and there’s something I thought I’d
like to try.”

“I’m game, long as I can do it with this
broke leg.”

“You won’t have to do anything, hon. Just
tell me you don’t mind.”

“Well, I don’t know what you’ve got in
mind, sweetheart, but I’m sure I won’t mind.”

Annalee sat up and twisted to face me, a
beautiful, sexy smile on her face. Then she scooted down, and bent over me so
her soft, silky hair covered my crotch. Before I could figure out those
feelin’s, her warm mouth came down over my cock like a…like I don’t know what.
“Ahhhhh,” I moaned. I’d heard tell of this, but it hadn’t never happened to me.
It was ten times, a hundred times, better than I could’ve imagined. When she
started workin’ her tongue and suckin’ I couldn’t do nothing but grab the
sheets in both hands and hang on. Then she stopped and took her mouth off me,
leavin’ me desperate for more.

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Now I could
hear the catch of laughter in her voice. She was teasin’! I could do that, too.

“Aw, it’s okay I guess,” I said. Then I
doubled right up when she punched me in the stomach. “Hey!”

“Tell me you love it.”

“God, baby, I love it. I ain’t never felt
nothin’ like it. I’m wonderin’ if I done died and gone to heaven. Please,
please do it some more.”

“That’s more like it,” she murmured, and
went back to doin’ it. I don’t think I woulda lasted even a second or two if we
hadn’t taken the edge off with the first time, so I was glad we had. The more
she sucked, the tighter my muscles got, ‘til I wondered if I was gonna have a
cramp and ruin everything. My breath got tight and short, and I was moanin’
like a sick calf. When I started to tense to come, I pulled her off me with
both hands.

Annalee give me a slack-mouthed stare that
like to’ve scared me to death. “Are you okay?”

“Fuck me,” she said. I never woulda thought
I’d hear that word come outta that pretty mouth, but it nearly sent me over. I
pulled her up and positioned her just right, then pulled her down on my cock
like my life depended on it. Her pussy squeezed me so hard I thought I’d come
right then, but I managed to hold off until she tensed up and gave a little
scream, while squeezin’ me even harder. Then I shot off, forgettin’ all about
needin’ a condom.

Annalee was chantin’ “Oh, God, oh God, oh
God.” She collapsed onto my chest where I held her and rocked her until she
could breathe again, with her long, silky, strawberry-smellin’ hair drifting up
to tickle my nose and get in my mouth.

Maybe it wasn’t the best timin’ but after
awhile, I said, “I think we forgot somethin’.”

“What?” she said, and then, “Oh, God!”
again, but this time with a different tone. I felt real bad when I realized how
scared she was.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. No matter what,
I’m gonna take care of you.”

I never saw a mood change so fast.

“Cody Wayne, you can’t even take care of
yourself right now. You better not have got me pregnant!”

“Well, it seems to me that we was both
wantin’ the same thing. Why didn’t
you
think about it?”

“I don’t know,” she said, kinda like she
had a misery.

“It’ll be okay.” I was whistlin’ in the
dark, but I had to comfort her somehow. What we’d just done seemed like the
most important thing I’d ever done in my life. I said that to her.

“Oh, honey, that’s so sweet. I’m sorry I
got mad. Maybe it will be okay.” She sounded so sad, I just wanted to hold her,
but she said she had to go, before the sun come up and caught her there in my
room instead of her own. “I’ll look at a calendar, see if we’re safe.”

“Okay. But, sweetheart? If somethin’ did
happen, I’m gonna take care of you. I’ll find a way.”

She touched my cheek, put on her
nightclothes, blew out the candle and left, forgetting to pick up the used
condom she’d thrown on the floor next to the bed. To tell the truth, I’d forgot
about it too.

The next mornin’ before I’d woke up, she
was back. She spotted the condom on the floor and said, “Oh, for heaven’s
sake.” Then she picked it up and took it in to flush it down the toilet, before
she came back and kissed me. I guessed I was forgiven.

“Good news, honey,” she said. “I shouldn’t
be fertile right now. It’s been a little off, since I was still nursing Tali up
‘til a couple of weeks ago, but I think we’re safe.”

“That’s real good, sweetheart. Now Uncle
Hank won’t kill me after all his warnin’s.” I felt like jumpin’ up and down to
be back in Annalee’s good graces, but of course, I couldn’t.

I don’t know whether Annalee told anyone
about us, or they was just observant. I sure didn’t tell nobody. But it was
plain as day that when the door was locked, everyone knew not to come knockin’
on it. There was an unending supply of condoms in the nightstand, and Annalee
come in to me almost every night. The only thing that coulda made it better was
if I could’ve been in charge once in a while. Annalee still had me where she
wanted me, helpless to do anything but follow her lead. I only minded for a
minute most of the time, though. What that woman could do with her mouth and
her pussy had me under a spell all right. And all I had to do was lay back and
enjoy it. Made me feel like a king or somethin’.

Not that I didn’t try to do my best to make
her feel good, too. Once she showed me what she wanted, I got real good at
finding that little bump between her legs that made her gasp and shake. I even
talked her into puttin’ her knees on either side of my head and lettin’ me lick
her there ‘til she screamed. I didn’t know if that was perverted, but if it
felt as good to her as her takin’ me in her mouth did to me, I didn’t care.

We still didn’t say ‘love’ or ‘marry’ right
out loud, but I thought Annalee understood me when I dreamed about the house
I’d buy in Texas with my rodeo winnin’s, so I could get to where it was warm in
the winter. She’d lay in my arms after we made love and listen to me for hours,
slippin’ away in the early mornin’ to be there with ‘em when her kids woke up.
Somewhere, she’d got hold of a walkie-talkie thing she called a baby monitor,
so she could hear ‘em from my room if they woke in the night, but they hardly
ever did. Them was sweet times, so sweet that I didn’t even notice that she was
gettin’ quieter and quieter, the more I told her my dreams.

Loving Cody was like heaven when we made love,
and a torture after. He
’d tell me all his rodeo dreams,
and talk about a house in Texas, but he never did say I was to have a part in
it. I couldn’t understand where we stood. He was sweet and loving, as good a
lover as the man on the DVD, thanks to me teaching him some things that he took
to like a duck in water. Once I got a baby monitor from Charity, I didn’t have
to worry about having someone check on them, so I could spend almost every
night with him, most of it anyway.

The girls weren’t jealous, but I knew they
were envious, especially Celeste. She’d turned eighteen, and was getting plenty
of attention, but she hadn’t found that special someone yet. She told me that
we might as well have been back at Bethel City with our husband for all the fun
she was having. I’d given her the DVD and books, so she was looking for sparks,
someone to turn her head around and make her love him like I loved Cody. So
far, none of that had happened, and she was getting close to the end of the
choices. We talked about her maybe leaving the ranch and moving into town, but
Russ wanted her to wait for spring weather so she could get a car and learn to
drive before it got bad again.

It was getting on for spring, at least on
the calendar, though we wouldn’t see warm weather for another three months,
‘til the end of May, at least. Cody was going to have to move back to the
bunkhouse soon, as soon as the doctor cleared him to put one hundred percent of
his weight on his leg without the cast and gave him the okay to ride. He was getting
anxious about it, and sometimes I thought he didn’t want me around. I was
really glad then that our slip-up with the condom hadn’t caught me pregnant. It
was beginning to look like I wasn’t going to have Cody for mine after all, once
he got out on the rodeo circuit.

On top of that, Hank still didn’t like me.
He tolerated what he knew we were doing, not saying anything about it because
it was no one’s business but our own. But he never missed a chance to tell Cody
how bad I was for him, or talk about how young Cody still was. Cody said he’d
told Hank off, but I didn’t notice much of a change.

It seemed like no time at all when Cody’s
checkup was good enough the doctor told him he could put full weight on his
leg, finally. It had been a long five months for him, though. He was so glad to
move back to the bunkhouse, he didn’t even notice that I was sad. There
wouldn’t be any more nights together now, not ‘til the weather got warm enough
that we could sneak off somewhere and catch some time alone. And it wouldn’t be
all night, because the baby monitor wouldn’t work very far out of the house,
and I couldn’t leave my babies unsupervised.

Rodeos down in Arizona, New Mexico and
Texas were already in full swing, but Cody was bound to wait for something
closer because he didn’t have the money to travel and stay away from the ranch
for very long. That, and he had to borrow a rig from the ranch and didn’t want
to get too far away with it. He sent in his fee for his first one in, down in
Southern Utah. I waited for him to ask me to go with him, but he never said
anything about it. When the time came for him to go, he kissed me goodbye and
told me to wish him luck, then left me standing with Tali on my hip and Al at
my side, watching the pickup and trailer disappear down the ranch road in a
cloud of dust.

I cried myself to sleep that night, the
first time of what would turn out to be every night for a couple of weeks
before Cody came home. But in the daytime, we were busy with getting the garden
ready again, and on the few warm days the kids wanted to be outside after the
long winter. Cody sent me a postcard from Moab that had beautiful pictures of
the red canyons of the Colorado River, and I got a little homesick. The scenery
around here wasn’t much different to the eye, except there was more red in the
rocks that made up the cliffs of Southern Utah and Northern Arizona. Made it
kind of drab in Wyoming, especially since the cold weather came earlier and
stayed later, so there wasn’t much sunshine to pick up the color in the dirt
and rocks.

When Cody came back, we all crowded around
to hear how he did. He said, “Well, I didn’t bring home no buckles.” He gave a
little chuckle then, but he looked worn out to me, and not happy. I figured he
didn’t want to say anything in front of the rest, wanted to wait to tell me his
news in private. He was going to unload Abo and give him the care he needed
after the long ride in the trailer, then clean up the trailer and pickup. He
told me he’d see me at dinner. It looked like I was going to have to wait for a
hug and kiss.

After dinner, I bathed my kids and got them
ready for bed, read them a story from a picture book, and put them down to
sleep. Amber had agreed to come with her baby and watch them ‘til I got back,
even though I couldn’t tell her when that would be. I rushed out to the barn to
see if Cody was waiting there for me, but I found his uncle there, too, and he
scowled at me when I came in.

“Hi, Hank, Cody.”

“You got no call to be out here, girl, get
on back in the house,” he said coldly. I looked at Cody, and he looked pained,
but he didn’t say anything.

“Cody?”

“We’re havin’ a talk, Annalee. I’ll come up
to the house in a little while, if you still want to come out and visit awhile.
That okay?”

Feeling the tears starting, I left as fast
as I could, after nodding my agreement. I’d sit in the kitchen, probably having
to put Janet off about what was wrong, and hope he’d be there before it got too
late.

Janet didn’t much approve of my
relationship with Cody. It was an open secret that she and Hank had a thing
going. Charity said they were like cats, you knew they did it, but you couldn’t
catch them at it. I couldn’t talk to her about Cody’s coldness to me, so we
pretended to talk about other things, though I was seldom found in the kitchen
that late and she had to know I was waiting for Cody.

Janet gave up and went to bed around ten
o’clock, needing to be up early to fix breakfast. I should have done the same,
since I was her helper, but I wanted to see Cody, and I couldn’t believe he
wouldn’t come after what he’d said. I needed his arms around me, and his
kisses, to reassure me that he was still mine. By eleven, I knew he wasn’t
coming, the knowledge searing into my heart like a branding iron. Cody didn’t
want me anymore. He probably found some cowgirl at the rodeo that was more
exciting than me, that didn’t have two kids. With tears rolling down my cheeks,
I made my way to bed, sobbing silently into my pillow until I fell asleep.

The next morning at breakfast, I couldn’t
see anyone but him. He sat tall among the hands, telling stories about his
events that were mostly funny. Russ asked him pointedly about prize money, and
Cody flushed.

“Not much, Boss. I won enough at the first
rodeo to enter the second and get there, and that’s about the way it went. But,
it’ll get better. My leg’s still kinda stiff, and that costs me some time
gettin’ off Abo and to the calf.”

“Are you keeping up with your physical
therapy?”

“When I can. Hard to do it in a motel room,
without no equipment. But I do what I can.”

That was the end of the discussion, and the
hands all left to get to work after that. Without a glance at me, Russ excused
himself and went to his office, leaving Charity and my sisters at the table
with me. Celeste was the first to say anything.

“Annalee, you look like somebody pulled you
through a knothole backwards. What’s going on?” Trust Celeste to say exactly
what was on her mind.

“Nothing,” I answered, my eyes on my plate
because I couldn’t look any of these women in the face. I looked up just in
time to see Charity shake her head at Celeste. As if by mutual consent,
everyone got up right then, and took our plates into the kitchen, rinsed them
off and put them in the industrial-sized dishwasher. It was a ritual that
everyone better keep, or answer to Janet. Charity held me back when I would
have followed the others out.

“Annalee…”

“Charity, I can’t talk about it yet.
Please.” I knew the misery was coming off me in waves, but I couldn’t say it
out loud. After more than six months together, after I’d given him my heart and
made love with him, Cody didn’t want me, and it had only taken two weeks away
from the ranch for that to happen. My dreams were shattered, my prospects not
much better than they had been when I left Bethel City, though now I had a high
school degree and some skill with computer programs. I’d think about that
later, though. Right now, I needed to cry some more, and I couldn’t do it in
front of Charity without an explanation. When she didn’t argue with me, I fled
the room.

Once I’d cried all my tears out, I started
thinking about what I needed to do next. I’d have to leave the ranch, that much
was plain to see. Cody was the only man I wanted, and if I couldn’t have him, I
certainly couldn’t let Russ support me for the rest of my life. I was young,
but thanks to Russ I had some skills. Celeste was wanting to move to town,
maybe we could get a place together and find jobs. We wouldn’t be too far away
from the younger girls, we could see them on weekends maybe. I couldn’t say I
was excited, because it didn’t match my dream of finding a man and taking care
of a family, but it began to cheer me some as I realized I could make it on my
own.

I washed my face and went to find Celeste.

“Annalee, you tell me what’s going on right
this minute, or I’m not talking to you.” Celeste was mad at me, because I
hadn’t told her at breakfast, I guess.

“Celeste, I just…it’s Cody.”

“What about him? What’s he done to you?”
she asked, her fierce look breaking out. Cody would be in big trouble if he
walked in right then, and he hadn’t even done anything. That was the trouble.

“He hasn’t done anything to me, except
ignore me,” I confessed. “He said to wait for him in the house while he talked
to Hank, but he never came.” Fresh tears threatened to spill over.

“Why? What’s happened that he’d be that
way?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I haven’t had a chance to
talk to him alone. I guess maybe he found someone else, while he was riding in
those rodeos.” Saying it out loud was like a knife to my heart, and I sank onto
her bed, wrapping my arms around myself and drawing my legs up to help the
pain.

“Oh, honey. How could that be? He’s over
the moon for you,” she said.

“Not anymore. He hasn’t even kissed me
hello or given me a hug, since he got back. Too busy with Hank, I guess. And
Hank’s never liked me, so maybe Cody’s finally listening to him.” I pulled
myself together with an effort, and went on in what I hoped was a stronger
voice. “Are you still planning on moving to town?”

“Yes, as soon as I can find a place. Russ
told me I was welcome to stay here, but I’ve run out of cowboys and still not
found a good one. All except Cody, of course.” If she meant that as a joke, it
was the wrong thing to say. I looked at her with a stricken expression, and she
said, “Oh, honey, I wouldn’t make a play for your man.”

“I guess you could,” I said listlessly. “He
doesn’t seem to be mine anymore.”

“Let’s not talk about him,” said Celeste.
“What I meant to say was, when I told Russ I’d just as soon move on, he offered
to help with a deposit and first three months rent on an apartment, and to give
me money for groceries and diapers until I can find a job and start earning a
paycheck. Bet he’d do the same for you.”

“I’m sure he would. Celeste? Would you want
to get a place with me? We could maybe find jobs that had different hours so we
could watch each other’s kids and not have to pay a babysitter.”

“That’s a great idea! So, you want to leave
the ranch? Then let’s do that!”

“I don’t want to, it’s become my home. But
I can’t see a future here now. I’d best move on and try to make a life for
myself.” Grief filled me at what I’d be losing, but I’d already lost the most
important part of why I was here. “Do you have your driver’s license yet,
Celeste?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Let’s borrow a rig and go
apartment-hunting today.” The sooner I could get away where I wouldn’t have to
see Cody, the better I’d like it.

We left the kids with our sisters and
borrowed Russ’s SUV. Apartment hunting was discouraging. The best we could find
was two-bedroom apartments, and Celeste flatly declared that she wasn’t going
to have her son sleeping with her in her room, in case she wanted another kind
of company. We didn’t think we could afford a house, though the idea appealed
to me because then we could have a little yard for the kids to play in . But,
after going to a lot of real estate offices, we found a little house that had
just been renovated for rent. Built sometime in the 1970s, it was boxy and
unattractive, with a tiny kitchen, but it did have three bedrooms and one and a
half baths. That would be important as we had only one of the kids potty
trained, and the other two were getting to that point. It was twelve hundred a
month, six hundred for each of us, and we thought we could swing that if we got
jobs soon. The agent waived the security deposit when he found out Russ White
was our guardian, and took Russ’s blank check to hold until Russ himself could
come look at the house.