Wreck Me: Steel Talons MC (13 page)

“That’s it, I’m cancelling cable.” Susan spoke out loud to herself in the empty living room, where she’d been gorging on salty junk food and flipping channels for at least an hour. “Three hundred plus channels, and not a damn thing on. What a waste of two hundred dollars a month.”

She hadn’t been able to sleep, plagued by thoughts of her father dying and Jim crashing out on some remote road where no one would find him and call for help this time. It didn’t help that she had downed a good two or three sodas and half a pot of coffee. Her body hummed with energy for which she had no outlet.

She heaved herself off the couch in a burst of responsibility and started throwing away empty bags of food, putting away half-empty ones, and tossing cans in the trash. She put her coffee cup in the sink and then thought better of it, grabbing her sponge and cleaner to wash it and the rest of the dishes that had built up in the sink over the last couple of days.

Earlier, Susan had cracked. Her emotions finally got the best of her, and she’d shattered, just like the phone against the wall. But she’d recognized the signs and metaphorically picked herself up and dusted off. She’d tossed her phone, saving the SIM card, and headed to the store to get another one. It had cost a pretty penny, and she really couldn’t afford it, but she needed a phone in case her mother called, or the hospital.

Admit it, you just wanted to make sure you didn’t miss Jim’s call.
She tossed the sponge back in the sink and dried her hands. She almost missed the call, not used to the new ringer. And with the television blasting in the background, she had to lunge to grab it by the time she realized someone was calling.

“Hello?” she answered, not even looking at the caller ID.

“Want some company?” Jim’s voice was gruff in her ear.

She blinked in surprise. She’d thought he would be gone for days, the way he’d talked. “Do I even get a ‘hi’ or anything?” she teased.

He laughed. “Hi. Want some company?”

Susan laughed, too. “I don’t think ‘want’ is the right word. Considering I’ve been talking to myself, I think I might
need
someone else around for a couple of hours or so.”

“I’m on my way.” The line went dead, and Susan jumped up, feeling the need to pick up her room once again. But she stopped as she heard a knock on the door, and she rushed over to throw it open.

She stared at Jim, stunned, and mirrored his smile. “That didn’t take long.”

He shrugged. “I had a gut feeling you’d say yes.” Before she could move or say anything, he took one big step toward her, and his mouth came down to devour her as he rotated so she hit the wall.

The caffeine buzz coupling with instant arousal, she crawled up his body until her legs wrapped around his waist, and she thrust her hips forward to press against the erection that was more than ready to ease her need. She kicked her foot out, and the door slammed closed. She moved her lips down Jim’s neck, nipping and kissing as she went, and Jim growled, “That was a nice trick.”

Susan spoke with her lips against his skin. “Yeah, I’m nothing if not efficient and creative.”

She shut him up with another thrust of her hips, and his hands closed over the backs of her thighs. He carried her to the bedroom and fell with her onto the bed, but she was in no mood to let him take the aggressive position. With a violent shove, she pushed him off her and rolled on top of him, shoving his shirt up under his chin so she could kiss and lick his stomach and chest.

She made fast work of his fly, and when his erection sprung from it, she caught the tip of it in her mouth, running circles around him with her tongue. He moaned. “God, that feels good.”

She chuckled, and the vibration made Jim’s cock twitch. He let out a vile curse and put his hands on the back of her head, pushing her to take more of him in. She slide her lips down his shaft, to his base, and back up, and then she did it again. She kept at it until his fingers twisted in her mess of hair and dragged her back to his mouth, where he devoured her like a starving man.

He rolled Susan onto her back and yanked at her loose house pants, baring her, and his kiss on her cleft made her shiver almost convulsively. He licked and sucked at her until she screamed with her orgasm, and in the midst of her wave of pleasure, Jim mounted her, thrusting deep inside her. She wrapped her ankles around his neck to lift her hips from the bed, and he pounded into her until she thought she might pass out from pure ecstasy.

When he came, it was hard and fast, and his face twisted into an expression of pain. She felt his body jerk inside her and reveled in it, and euphoria settled over her from the mutual release. He collapsed on top of her, and she slowly adjusted her breathing back to a rhythmic, even whisper. Somewhat recovered, she pushed at his shoulder, and Jim rolled to the side. It eased her chest to have his weight off, and she took a deep, satisfying breath. “Well, that was necessary.”

He chuckled beside her, a winded, tired sound. “Yes, it was.”

To Susan’s chagrin, her earlier thoughts began to taunt her again, and she frowned to herself in the dark room. “Where were you earlier?”

Jim knew something was going to ruin the moment. He didn’t have a lot of problems with women, but one thing was true of all of them. They couldn’t leave things alone. They wanted answers, so they poked and prodded until they pissed off the bull, and the bull went raging through the china shop, shattering the peace.

“Jim?” she asked again.

Heaving a sigh as he rolled to a seated position, he told her, “I had some club business. Don’t worry about it.”

“Don’t worry about it?” she repeated. Great, she was irritated again. Here it came. “You run off, saying you have obligations, and we miss each other all day. Then you show up at my door, and you screw me like a dying man on his last ride. But you tell me not to worry about it? Dammit, Jim, this club has you by the balls, and they’re yanking you away from the things you take pleasure in.”

That was rich. “Well, the club’s been there for me for a long time, and I’m obligated, just like I said. I can’t help it if other people want to come along and take control of my balls, insisting that I’m making a mistake by being loyal to my family.” He stood, closing his fly and pulling his shirt down. “And they are my family. I don’t have anyone else.”

He heard her smack her hand against the bed behind him. “I just wish we could make this work out in a way that each of us could be there when the other needs it.”

He rounded, glowering at her through the darkness. “I suppose I’m the only one who felt relieved. At least, until you started this little tiff.”

“No, but…” She trailed off, and Jim hoped she didn’t pick the conversation back up. He should have known better. He strode out of the bedroom toward her small kitchenette, looking for a glass and a drink of water, and she trailed behind him, attempting to pull her pants back on as she went. “I needed you earlier, Jim. I don’t want to have to wait for what I need until the damn club says you’re free to leave.”

“Is that how you think it works?” He was sweltering, which only fueled his anger, and he realized he’d never taken his jacket off as he finally found a glass and filled it with water from the tap. He guzzled half of it before he spoke again. “I have the freedom to go where I please, when I please. No one tells me what to do. Not you, and certainly not the Talons. Anything I do with them is my choice.”

“Then tell me why you’re so worked up tonight. Where did you
choose
to go? What did you have to go that made you so furious you nearly broke both of us in that bedroom?”

He finished the water and thumped the glass on the counter. Glaring at Susan, Jim asked, “Do you really want to know? Because I thought we agreed it was better not to mix business with pleasure. You don’t approve of my line of work, so I wouldn’t think you’d want all the gory details.”

They stared at each other, a game of chicken, and it was Susan who looked away first. “Just tell me if it was dangerous.”

He scoffed. “It depends on what you consider dangerous. I think the way you drive is dangerous.”

“Don’t be snarky, Jim. I’m serious right now.”

That was another thing. Women were serious far too often. “It was a little hairy, but I’m smart enough and experienced enough to know how to handle things like this. You, on the other hand, are wholly unprepared to hear the details of tonight’s little business meeting.”
Watch yourself, she’ll freak out if you even hint at guns or illegal activities.

She dropped onto the couch and crossed her arms, and Jim stood there, leaning on the counter, and wondered if this was going to blow over or if he should get out before she started hurling heavy objects at his head. After a long silence, she spoke in a small voice. “How do I know that, one day, you just won’t come back?”

Jim squeezed his eyes shut. This was not a conversation he wanted to have tonight. It hit too close to home and called up the image of the gun pointed at him a couple of hours ago. “I’ve always come back. And my business isn’t as bad as you probably think. We don’t run drugs, and we don’t sell guns. We haven’t lost a guy to anything but natural causes as long as I’ve been with the club. But I’m guessing you get all your ideas about motorcycle clubs from documentaries on Hell’s Angels and other crocks of shit.”

She didn’t answer, and when Jim came around the counter to see her expression, her cheeks were red with embarrassment. He laughed. “That’s what I thought.”

Susan closed her eyes and shook her head. Jim saw the fight go out of her and he let go of a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her eyes still closed. “I just got some really bad news today, and it’s made me think about how easy it is to lose someone that… ” She didn’t finish, but she gazed up at him and met his eyes. “Someone that you might actually give a shit about.”

Jim could think of about a thousand things he would have imagined coming out of her mouth, but nowhere on that list had those words appeared. “What happened to you today? You almost fainted reading a text, and now you’re talking about mortality and losing people.”

Susan leaned forward and rested her elbows on her knees. “My father’s dying. We don’t get along. I don’t really get along with any of my family, or I would be at the hospital with him right now.”

Something in Jim’s gut wrenched. He hadn’t been a big fan of his own father, but it had still hurt to lose him. “I’m sorry, Susan. How long does he have?”

“I don’t know.” There were tears in her voice, and she sniffed, obviously not wanting to cry. “He’s got a disease and needs chemo, which he can’t have without a liver transplant. But he can’t get a liver transplant because he’s an alcoholic, and he won’t even take one from family. So, days, maybe? Weeks? I don’t know. He’s in bad shape.”

It had been ages since Jim comforted anyone, but he tried. He sat next to Susan, pressed against her side, and put an arm around her shoulders. He pulled her head to his chest, and she didn’t fight him. Instead, she buried her face deep into him, like she needed his warmth. “Is there anything I can do?” he asked.

She shook her head against him, her voice was muffled by his clothes. “You’re doing everything you can right now.”

Jim rested his chin on top of her head, and they sat for a long time. His mind went blank; he couldn’t focus on anything but the feel of Susan in his arms and the pain that dwelled inside her. He understood loss and regrets. When she finally sat up and tucked her hair behind her ears, her eyes were red but they were dry. She gave him a sad, embarrassed smile. “Thank you.”

He smiled. “Are you feeling better?”

“I think so.” She didn’t sound convinced.

Risking another fight, Jim told her, “Maybe you should try to talk to your father and put whatever came between you in the past. You don’t want to have regrets when he’s gone. It’ll just eat at you until there’s nothing left to recover.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “You speak from experience.”

With a shrug, he stood. “I guess you could say that.” He made a show of adjusting his clothes while he took a minute to turn a corner and get off Memory Lane. “I need to get home. I’ve been on the go since about seven this morning. Are you okay? Are you going to be able to sleep?”

“I’ll be fine. What about you?”

He pretended to consider that carefully. Then, on a whim, he leaned down and kissed her with almost as much passion as he had when he’d arrived. He straightened and brightened at her stunned expression. “I think I’ll sleep just fine now.”

He walked out of her apartment without looking back. Jim mounted his bike, his heart feeling much lighter than it had an hour before, and kicked the engine to life. The machine rumbled beneath him, and he took off for home. He had two questions on his mind. First, what were they going to do with the Diablos’ request when the club met tomorrow? And second, had it been the sex or Susan’s admission of caring about him that made him feel on top of the world?

Both questions were frightening, and he knew the answer to either one of them could be the death of him. But Jim also knew for sure he was ready to face whatever came his way.