Yearning for Love (13 page)

“Did you at least give it a shot before dismissing him?”

“No, because I knew it wouldn’t work.”  Exasperated she went to the living room to get his coat.  “You should go check on your mom.”

“Nicole, are you seriously throwing me out?  I thought we were making progress.”

“I’m saving you from making the worst mistake of your life.  I enjoyed the kiss, I even feel better after emptying my baggage on you, but, you deserve better.”

“You are so wrong; I deserve you.  I’m not giving up on us.”

She folded her arms resting her weight on one leg. “Do you want kids one day?”

He nodded. “Maybe one day, why do you ask?”

“Imagine this.  We get together, get married and have a couple of cute babies.  On a lazy Saturday morning, we’re lying around, and the kids ask about our extended families.  Granted your mom may be involved in their lives if she gets over the fact I’m black.  My parents, on the other hand, wouldn’t know they exist.”

“We’ll love our kids enough so they won’t ask those types of questions.”

“Kids are curious and will want to know everything about their heritage.”

“You are reaching, Nicole.  You have to do better than that.”

“Okay, how about this one.  My father told me I was a mistake.  In order for me never to say that to anyone, I have to stay away from people like you.”

“People like me.  What the hell does that mean?” He asked frowning.

“You are the type of person that wants to be a part of something.  You want marriage, to reproduce.  You want to sit on the porch and grow old with your spouse.  None of that can be done with me.  I’m in this world alone and I will die alone.”

He grabbed her by the shoulders shaking her. “Woman, you are punishing yourself. 
YOU
are continuing where your old man left off.  Nicole, let it go and move forward.”

She stomped her foot on the floor. “I was nine, Walker!  I was nine-years old when he told me he wished I was never born. I don’t ever want to hear those words come from my mouth to the ears of a child of mine.”

“Your self-worth is shot to hell and I’m going to help you fix it.  I will prove you are important, and the air you breathe is for a reason.”

Her eyes remained free of tears. “I appreciate the concern but it won’t work. I refuse to bring you into my living hell.”  She caressed his face. “Goodbye, Walker.  I truly hope you find a woman to shower you with true love and affection. I’m just not the one.”

“You don’t have to live this way. I’ll change all of it for you.”

“Baby, this is just beginning.  What I have planned will reveal my dear father’s deepest secrets, and I will get my revenge.  Of course, he will come after me with guns ablaze, and you or anyone else don’t need to be a part of it,” she said shoving him towards the door.

“Nicole, don’t plot revenge against your father.  It will come back to haunt you.  The best revenge you can get against him is letting him know he didn’t break you.”

“He did break me.  It is now up to me to stop him before he makes a bid for the White House in two years.”

“Dammit, listen to me!”

“I’m sorry you wasted your time for nothing.  Although, I am glad I got to talk to you one last time.  I do have to eat and get to bed.  Take care, Walker Albright,” she said closing the door in his face.

Chapter Seven

Walker stormed from the apartment building to his truck.  Snatching his cell phone from the console he started to dial a number until he saw the clock; it was too late to call anyone.  Starting the truck he pulled from the curb to head to the hotel.  His head was banging, and he hoped the bar was open.  He needed a beer to mull over what to do about Nicole.  Despite her erratic behavior, he felt it was his duty to keep her from destroying her life.

Arriving at the hotel, he entered the adjoining door connecting the two rooms together.  His mother was sitting in bed watching television. “What are you still doing up.”

“Thank God you are back,” she answered clicking off the TV. “So how did it go with the young lady?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.  You should get to sleep; I want to leave for home early in the morning.”

“Walker, what happened?  Did she reject you?”

“Mom, I have a lot on my mind, and I don’t want to discuss it.  Good night,” he said going to his room.

Kicking off his shoes, he laid on the bed.  His headache hadn’t subsided with the two beers he drank.  If anything, it intensified.  He couldn’t wrap his head around the Nicole he saw tonight and the woman he met three months ago.  The sweet woman he rescued from the snow was not present tonight.  This woman was bitter, cold, and determined to get revenge against a man that had brainwashed her since birth.

He sat on the side of the bed removing his shirt.  It smelled of her perfume.  When he scrubbed his hands down the scruff surface of his face, he smelled her on his hands.  Her beautiful face hid her pain well.  He thought he had problems, but nothing compared to what she was dealing with.  It was no wonder she was confused and angry.  He had his mother to bitch to about his life; Nicole had no one but herself.  She’d been on her own since a young age and the roots of her anger were buried deep—maybe too deep for him to uproot.

A laissez-faire attitude was out of the question for her.  She had every right to be pissed at life.  His mission was to find a way for her to be pissed and stay out of jail.

He took off his pants getting under the cover.  The drive to Cleveland would be to drop his mom off and tie together a few loose ends at work then back to Columbus to work on Nicole.

*****

At seven o’clock in the morning, Nicole wiped down the shower stall and shook the excess water from the shower curtain to avoid mildew buildup around the bathtub.  Securing the towel around her wet body, she hung the shower cap on the hook on the back of the door and left the bathroom.  She was running late for work but really didn’t care if she got there on time or not.

Sitting on the bed, she hurried to rub lotion between her hands to smooth on her arms and legs.  She wouldn’t be running late had she not sat up half the night regretting her actions.  She made the mistake of letting Walker in her private life.  Once he’d left, the self-pity party began until she fell asleep.  Today was a new day, and she had to bottle away the emotions in order to face the public.

Done with the lotion, she went to the dresser to spray a touch of vanilla body oil on her body and comb her hair.  Putting on the freshly ironed khaki pants and blue blouse, she took her shoes and left the bedroom.  The telephone was ringing as she left the apartment.  The machine would have to answer since there was no time to chat.

Two hours into the work day she sat at her desk munching on half of a cinnamon bagel and drinking a cup of hot tea.  Her throat had been tingling, and she wanted to nip whatever bug was nesting inside her body early.

The outside line on her desk phone rang and she answered the call. “IT department; this is Nicole, how may I help you.”

“I need to see you stat.  I’ll have a car come for you around noon.”

“Excuse me, but who is this?” She asked frowning into the phone.

“Nicole, you know damn well who this is.  Just be outside at noon and not a minute later.”

The chilling flashback of the icy voice she had not heard in years singed her ears.  Nicole’s stomach yanked to a tight ball straining not to regurgitate the bagel and tea bubbling fiercely in her gut.

“How the hell did you find me?”

“I have my ways. Anyhow, this is not a friendly call.  I have something for you do to and you’re going to do it with a smile.”

“Who do you think you are? I don’t take orders from you anymore.”

“Don’t be stupid, girl, it won’t be a pretty meeting once we are face-to-face. So, make this easy on yourself and do as you’re told.”

Clutching the phone in her hand, she flashed a glance around the room to make sure none of her co-workers was standing over her shoulder.  Satisfied they were engaged in other activities she cowered closer to the desk and said in a low but compelling tone. “You’ve just wasted thirty-seconds of your precious time talking to me, because I have no intention of ever seeing you again, unless we’re seated side-by-side in hell.”  She started to slam down the phone until she heard him yelling.

“Nicole, if you betray me, you will regret it for the rest of your life.  The car will be outside at noon.  Make yourself available.”

“Try to bully someone who is afraid of you, Theodore; because it’s not working on me,” she said slamming down the phone.

She got up from the desk trembling.  Too many years had passed since she’d last laid eyes on him in person. What did he want or need to talk to her about?  He couldn’t possibly want a favor from his worst enemy.

Taking her mug of tea and security badge, she had to get away for a minute to regroup.  Walking down the hallway, burly men dressed in overalls, were busy loading office furniture onto wheeled plats.  The chatter amongst office workers involved the move to the new building.  Those going were excited about the change in scenery while those given the bad news did not have much to say.

Nicole made it almost to the elevator before her named was called. “Nicole, I need help.  My computer is frozen, and I can’t get it to do anything.  Can you take a quick look?” The sharply dressed woman asked with pleading eyes.

“Sure, Mrs. Colby; I will take a look at your computer.”  Nicole followed the woman into her office.  Sitting behind a large wood and glass desk, she immediately knew what was wrong.  “Mrs. Colby, did you spill anything on the keyboard?”  Of course, the woman would deny it even with the drops of liquid pooling on the keys.

“I didn’t spill anything.  Anyhow, just get the computer working so I can use it; I have a meeting in an hour and my reports are not finished.”

“Someone from user support will bring you a new keyboard.  That should remedy your problem,” she said disconnecting the old keyboard.

“No, you get it bring it back right away.  Geez, it’s not as if you have anything to do.”

“Excuse me?”  Theodore Carpenter had ruined her day with his obnoxious phone call.  It would take very little for her to go over the edge at this point.

“Nicole, your job, until the end of the week, is to help the other people in the computer department get ready for the move. Why bother them when you aren’t doing anything important but keeping a chair warm?”

Nicole tapped her foot and smiled. “You’re are absolutely right, Mrs. Colby.” 

Returning to the computer room, she dropped the damaged keyboard on the counter and went to her desk to get her purse and jacket.  Going to her supervisor’s office, Jack was reading the newspaper when she walked in and put her security badge and office keys in the center of his desk.  “Jack, I’m out.”

“What’s wrong, Nicole? Aren’t you feeling well?”

“I’ve never felt better about my life.  However, it has been brought to my attention that I’m only a seat-filler for the next couple of days.”

“I had no control over which techs the company kept or let go, Nicole.  They pretty much went by seniority.  You have been here the least amount of time.”

She held up her hand. “I’m not placing any fault for my demise with you, Jack.  I’m only letting you know I’m leaving today.  I had a dream once, and I let it go when it didn’t pan out the way I expected.  It’s time for me to rethink my priorities in life and reach for my dreams while I’m young enough to fall on my ass and bounce back.”

“I agree but wait the three days, Nicole.  You will get a severance package and have a little cushion to pad the fall.”

She shook her head. “Nope, I’ve put it off long enough.  I have to start believing in myself and taking chances again.”

He leaned back in the chair crossing a leg over his knee. “Well, I will miss your smiling face around here, but how many people can say they have a friend whose father is running for president.  His campaign will certainly keep you busy.”

“W-where did you hear that?”  She managed to keep the stuttering surprise from her voice. It now made sense why her father wanted to talk her suddenly.

He turned the paper around on the desk so she could read the bold print headline. “Right here on page one of the newspaper.”

“Huh, he announced his bid to run early.”

“You must be excited.  If he wins, you’ll be the First Daughter and able to travel the world and rub noses with kings and queens.”

She crinkled her nose. “I don’t see myself curtsying for anyone.  Besides, elections are two-years away, and anything is apt to happen.”

“Your jubilation is knocking me out of my chair, McLin.  Anyhow, tell your father congratulations, and he has my vote.”

Nicole resisted the urge to stick two fingers down her throat and gag.  She patted herself on the back for keeping her true relationship with her parents a secret for so many years.  The things she wanted to say to people when remarks were made about either of them had her biting her tongue until she tasted blood to keep from screaming
if only you knew
.

Nicole gave him two thumbs up. “I’ll make sure to tell him.  Well, it has been a pleasure working with you, Jack.  Thank you so much for never telling anyone my connections to Senator Carpenter.”

“Hey, I respect you want to live a separate life from your parents. Politics can be gruesome on family members. Yet, to be the daughter of the President of the United States would be awesome.”

“Yes, it is and no I don’t want to be a part of that.  I don’t want the media in my face whenever he does anything questionable, or have a target on my back. I want to live my own life free of the microscope.”

“We see things differently, but I understand.  I hate I’m losing you.  You were truly a team player and did whatever needed to be done without me asking.”  He lifted his large body from the small squeaky chair. “I know hugs are inappropriate in the workplace, but I’m giving you one anyhow.”

Nicole cringed when his arms went around her.  Jack was a big man, but a gentle giant and the best boss she’d ever had.  He was a political buff and stumbled across her true identity by mistake but kept it a secret as she’d wished.