Your Man Chose Me (8 page)

Two weeks later I was discharged from the hospital. I was happy that Ant was there to pick me up. I had a good feeling things were going to be fine between us. I did feel a little bad when he got shot. Though he didn't say anything, but I knew it was behind me. I was hoping that he had killed dude because I had no idea what dude might be saying. I hoped he kept his mouth shut.

I was happy to be at home with the children at first, but Ant was barely at home. I started feeling like things were still fucked up. I needed to get my strength back. I just couldn't stand losing him.

My phone started ringing. I looked at my caller ID and noticed it was my bitch Lori. I was happy to hear from her because she was like the neighborhood newspaper. Whatever was going on, she'd know about it. “Hey, boo.”

“Hey, bitch. So you home and didn't call me?”

“Girl, I'm just trying to adjust to life again; plus, this pain is kicking my ass. They gave me Percocet, but that shit be having me high as hell.”

“I'm just happy you a'ight.”

“Yeah, me too. So what's going on out in the streets?” I inquired.

“Shit, same old, same old. Bitch, where Ant at?”

“Why? What's going on?”

“Bitch, you better not say nothing, but I was over my brother's house a few days ago and I saw him getting in the car with a pregnant chick. I couldn't really see her face, but she kind of light skinned.”

“Really? You sure it's not his sister?”

“Bitch, stop playing. His sister is blacker than me and no, this bitch had a big stomach. I saw his mama out there talkin' to the chick; then she went back into the house and they drove off leaving his car at his mama's house.”

I sat up in the bed. What the fuck was this I was hearing? Who the fuck was this bitch Lori was talking about? And she was pregnant? “Listen, are you sure? I can't figure out who that could possibly be. He only has the one sister,” I said puzzled.

“Bitch, I 'ont know who the hell she is, but I know I seen him with a bitch and her ass is pregnant.”

“Well, I ain't gon' say shit 'cause you told me. I swear I hope this nigga ain't fucking around on me.”

“Bitch, cut it out. You know how them dope boys are. You ain't the only bitch he fucking. You better be grateful he wifing your ass. Play your position and shut the hell up before you run his ass off. See, I know Mari be fucking them bitches, but I 'ont trip. I fuck him, suck his dick good, and keep him fed. I am not gon' lose my nigga behind these bitches.”

I was irritated. I wasn't tryin'a hear none of this shit she was preaching right now. Fuck that. I didn't want to share my baby daddy. I wanted to be the only one he was fucking and eating out.

“Well, I gotta run. I just wanted to see how you was doing and let you know this little piece of info.”

“A'ight, boo. I 'ppreciate you.”

Tears rolled down my face. This nigga was with a bitch who was pregnant and it wasn't family, I knew that for sure. I bet his mama had something to do with that shit. The bitch never liked me from day one. She thought her son was too good for me because I used to dance at the club. Shit, that bitch should have been happy I fucked with her son.

I was fed up. It was time for me to get to the bottom of this shit. For way too long, I'd been hearing rumors of him fucking around. I tried to ignore it, but this shit had gotten out of hand. I hoped he ain't had no fucking baby on the way. I swore if he did then his ass was gonna feel it.

* * *

Ant played the position of the perfect father and man. He would help me around the house and he made sure the girls were taken care of. I sat on the sofa watching him play patty cake with the girls. I smiled as I looked at my perfect little family. He saw me smiling and quickly turned his head away.

“Girls, go to y'all room for a second. Mommy needs to talk to Daddy for a second.”

“But, Mommy—”

“Go on, little girl,” I snapped.

“Damn, calm down. They were just chilling with their daddy.”

“Daddy? Well, let me ask you a question. What bitch you know who's pregnant?”

“Damn, what you talkin' 'bout? I 'ont know no pregnant bitch. Where is this coming from?”

“You fucking tell me. Somebody saw your ass with a bitch coming out of your mother's house the other day. So again, I'm asking, do you got a bastard on the way?”

“Yo, B, I 'ont know where you be getting your info from, but I only got two kids. You need to stop listening to them old dumbass bitches who can't keep a man of their own.”

As I sat there staring into his eyes, I could tell his ass was lying. In that instant I saw him for the piece of shit that he really was. “You know what, Ant, I don't fucking believe you. Whatever is in the fucking dark will come out in the light. I swear, if you lying, I will take my fucking kids and your dirty ass will never see them again. I promise you that.”

“You promise what? A, stop playing with me. If you ever take my kids, I will track you down and I will hurt you, B.” He stared me in the eyes.

I didn't flinch one bit. I was hurting, but I didn't let him see that. I put on my “I don't give a fuck” face and sat there with my arms crossed. “Don't you fucking threaten me. Like I fucking said, if you lying, it's not going down that easy.”

“Yo, I'm about to bounce.” He got up off the sofa.

“So we talking and you just gon' up and leave like that? Really, it's like you 'ont give a fuck about me or my fucking kids. What the fuck is happening to you?”

“Man, I'm not gon' sit here and listen to your crazy rants. And let's get this straight: I will never say fuck my kids. I will never leave them and if anybody, yes, anybody stands in the way, I will kill them without thinking about it.”

“Ant, you gon' do me like this? I just got raped and shot. I fucking need you. I fucking love you.” I wept. I saw nothing else was working so I had to put on my best performance to convince this dude that I really wanted to be with him.

“Yo, B, cut all that crying out and clean yourself up. You shouldn't let the girls see you like that.” He stormed out the door.

I jumped up and looked out the window. I saw him sitting on the hood of his car talking on the phone. I was irate. Here I was grieving and hurting and he just walked out like I didn't mean shit to him. I wiped my face just as a brilliant idea popped in my head. I walked up the stairs, as fast as I could, and gathered the girls, my keys, and my purse. I peeped through the window; he was still outside. I stood by the door waiting until he got in his car. I waited for him to pull off then I went outside and quickly got in my car. I knew I shouldn't be driving, but fuck that. I needed to see where his ass was off to in such a hurry.

“Mommy, where we going?” Diamond asked.

“We're just taking a little ride, baby.”

I pulled off and sped up a little until I saw him sitting at the stoplight. I was careful not to get too close, so I allowed a car to get in between my car and his. I had no idea where he was off to. All I knew was he wasn't going far because he didn't get on the expressway. I followed closely, taking every turn he took. He pulled up at a house on Abbey Ridge in Stone Mountain. I pulled up across the street, hoping he wouldn't turn around. I watched as he opened the door with a key and went inside. So my nigga just walked into a house that I had no idea about. I wanted to run up the driveway and knock on the door, but I glanced back at my children and notice that I couldn't act a fool out here right now. I sat out there in the car waiting to see if he was going to come back out, but he didn't.

“Mommy, I'm hungry. I'm hungry,” Diamond whined.

I made a mental note of the address and the house. I started the car and pulled off. I cut the music up to drown out the bickering voices of my kids and so they couldn't hear the weeping sounds of my cry.

“Mommy, it's too loud,” Diamond screamed.

“Shut up already,” I yelled back.

I was a nervous wreck. I wish I had a Percocet on me to pop. I drove home, crying the whole way. I got them into the house, bathed them, and got them ready for bed.

I crawled in my bed alone as I let the tears flow freely. I grabbed my phone and dialed Ant's number. His phone rang until his voicemail picked up. I sat there pressing redial about twenty times but there was still no answer. I threw the phone on the floor and cried out. I opened my drawer and pulled out my bottle of Percocet. I needed something to ease the pain I was feeling right now. I popped two pills instead of one. I couldn't believe this nigga.

My cell ringing interrupted my thoughts. I got up and grabbed it up off the floor. “Hello,” I said angrily without even looking at the caller ID.

“Yo, something happen? I see you called me over fifteen times.”

“Where are you? I was in so much pain. I couldn't move.”

“I'm all the way in Clayton County. Can't you call your mama?”

“You just got there?” I quizzed him.

“Yeah. I came straight out here after I left the house. I got some business to handle out here.”

“You're a fucking liar,” I said as I hung up in his face.

I knew he was fucking lying, too, because I followed him and I knew where the fuck he was at. I cut my phone off and crawled under my covers. In the morning I had some shit to do!

* * *

I was up bright and early. I got the girls dressed and dropped them off at Mama's house. She was ready to start preaching early in the damn morning, but I wasn't having it. I was on a mission to find out what the fuck was going on. I remembered the exact street down to the house. I parked a few houses down then walked up the driveway and rang the doorbell. First thing that caught my eye was Ant's orange Charger sitting there. I swallowed hard and continued waiting at the front door. I was nervous and shaking on the inside. I didn't know what I was getting myself into, but there was no turning back.

I rang the doorbell and waited some more, but there was no answer so I pressed it without easing up.

“Who is it?” I heard a voice holler.

“It's Yana. I need to talk to the owner,” I barely whispered.

The door busted open. “I'm the owner, and who the fuck are y . . .”

Trouble has a way of showing up on people's door. I heard the damn doorbell ringing early in the morning. I tried to ignore it because I wasn't expecting anyone especially early in the morning. I looked over at Micah and he was fast asleep. I guessed I had to go get the door. I grabbed my robe and wrapped it around my huge stomach. I stomped all the way down the stairs and asked who it was. I heard a voice but wasn't sure of the name. At this point it didn't matter because whoever was on the other side was going to get this severe case of tongue-lashing from me. I popped the door open.

There are no words to describe the surprise I got. “Hey, boo, what you doing here?” I tried to play it off.

“What, I can't stop by to see my sissy?”

Somehow that statement and the look on her face didn't add up. I never gave her my address or invited her to the house before. I took a deep breath and prepared myself mentally for anything. “Well, come on in.”

She stepped in and I closed the door behind us.

“Are you okay? Why didn't you call me?” I tried to make conversation. This bitch was up in my shit when I didn't invite her and she had a deranged look on her face. “Ayana, what's going on with you? You know it's early; and how did you get my address?”

“Tell me, sis . . . It's okay for me to call you that right? How long have you been fucking and sucking my baby daddy?”

I almost fainted when I heard those words come out of her mouth. I froze for a second but quickly regrouped. “Uh, what are you talking about?” I looked at her.

“Bitch, cut it out. I followed Ant, my baby daddy/man to this house yesterday. Fuck yesterday; his Charger is parked in your driveway right now. So again, I ask you, bitch, how long have you been fucking and sucking my man's dick?” she asked in a real aggressive tone.

I thought about lying, but I knew the bitch had to have some sort of idea if she was here in my house. I knew now was the time to let it all out. “Ayana, I didn't know he was your baby daddy until it was too late. I only found out after I visited you that day at your house.”

“You bitch! You've always wanted my life from the time me and my mama gave your homeless ass a place to live. You have always wanted to be me; now you fucking my man, bitch.”

“First off, I'm not your bitch. Like I said it wasn't intentional. And as far as me wanting to be like you, that's bullshit. Bitch, you're the bottom of the fucking barrel. Why would I want to be like you? All you do is fuck and get high. Come on now, let's not go there.” I was pissed the fuck off. My heart rate was rising and I wanted to jump on this bitch.

“Where is he? You are carrying his baby, too? That's why you never introduced me to the nigga you were fucking, because it's my man. Bitch, you are a lowdown piece of shit. How could you?” She lunged toward me. I raised my hands and two pieced that bitch.

God knows I didn't want to fight that bitch because I was pregnant, but fuck that. I continued punching that bitch and blocking blows. I was so caught up in guarding my stomach that I didn't hear when Micah came down the stairs.

“What the hell going on down here?” he yelled.

“You dirty bastard! Is this the bitch you've been fucking all along?”

He stood there frozen with his mouth wide open, as if he'd just seen a ghost.

“Close your damn mouth, boo. When did you start fucking my sister/bestie?”

“Man, how the fuck you got in here? You follow me or something?”

“Yes, I followed you. I knew you was lying to my face last night. Do you know this bitch and I grew up in the same house, wore the same drawers, and ate out of the same pot? This bitch always wanted to be me, so she started fucking you. Say something, you fucking bastard.” She stepped in his face and slapped him.

“What I told you about putting your fucking hands on me? You should've stayed your ass at the house and stopped fucking meddling,” he lashed out.

“Meddling? Nigga, I gave you four fucking years and two beautiful children and here you are with this ol' shallow-ass bitch playing house while your kids need you.”

“Man, get out of here and go on home.”

“Man, fuck you, this bitch, and the fucking baby she carrying. I hope that little bastard don't fucking make it. I wish all of y'all just fucking die.”

I ran up on that bitch and start punching her ass again.

“What the fuck you doing? You're pregnant.” He grabbed me up and pushed me into a corner.

“Yo, get out of here, for real. You can't come up in nobody shit acting crazy. You could've waited 'til I came to the house.”

“Nigga, fuck you. Who the fuck you think you're checking in front of this bitch? You left your good woman at home to be with a bitch who fucked and sucked everything including her mama's man when we were growing up?”

“Bitch, you're worried about the wrong motherfucking thing. You need not worry about my pussy and who I fucked. You just mad because your man chose me!”

“Bitch, whatever. Ant don't fucking want you. We supposed to be getting married and everything. I am his woman and the mother of his children. All you are is some easy pussy. Niggas don't respect your kind. Come on, baby, let's go home. We can work through this shit.” She gave me an evil look and grabbed Micah's arm.

“No, stop! Get off me. I'm not going anywhere with you. I asked you to leave because I didn't want to do this in front of anybody. But you are pushing it. I am not with you. I told you it was over. I am with Tiana now and she's having my seed.”

I watched as the smile she had a minute ago disappeared off her face. That bitch looked like she was constipated and need to take a quick shit.

“Boy, quit playing. You 'ont want this hood bugger bitch who has been run through by e'ery-damn-body. Boy, let's go home to our babies.” She grabbed his arm.

“Nah, B, I'm for real. I ain't know y'all was related and shit, but the fact is I'm in love with her. She is my woman and I don't want to be with you anymore.”

“Are you fucking serious? I know you mad right now, but you can't be serious. You bitch, how could you do this to me? I promise on my mama, I am going to pay you back in full, bitch,” she said storming out the door.

I walked over to the door and locked it. I was scared to turn around and face him. I knew he had all sorts of questions, which I knew I had to answer.

“Your sister? Did you know she was my baby mama?” he asked with an attitude.

I stayed quiet for a few minutes, then I spoke, carefully choosing my words. “Micah, I swear to you, I did not know who you were until the other day when I put two and two together. By then, it was too late and I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want to lose you.”

“You think it's so fucking easy to lose me? I fucking love you, but I didn't want to have kids by two sisters. That's some bullshit. She never mentioned that she had a sister and neither did you.”

“That's because we're not blood sisters. It's a long story. My mother's boyfriend tried to rape me when I was younger, so I ran to her house. I ended up staying for good with her and her mother. I thought we were close. So no, we're not blood sisters.”

He let a deep sigh of relief. “Man, this shit is crazy.” He rubbed his hands over his face. Baby boy looked stressed out, like the world was coming down on his shoulders.

The sound of glass breaking caught us both off guard. We both ran to the door. I opened it and saw that bitch smiling at me as she pulled off. We both looked at each other and stepped outside, and that's when we saw what that sound was. All his windows on his car were shattered. I couldn't believe this bitch.

“I'm about to call the motherfuckin' police.” I turned to go back into the house.

“Nah, ma, don't even do that. I'll deal with her myself. I can't put my kids through no more drama.”

“Listen, if you keep giving her ass passes, she's gonna make your life hell. You need to get this shit under control before it gets worse.” I stormed off into the house.

I was so mad that I felt my blood boiling. I tried to count backward to cool down my temper. I rubbed my stomach as I thought about my baby. I felt a few kicks and then a sharp pain ripped through my stomach.

“Aargh, Aargh,” I screamed out as I stumbled to the couch.

“T, you a'ight?” He ran to my side.

“I don't know. I am hot and I'm feeling dizzy.”

“Hold on.” He ran out of the living room. He came back in with a glass of ice water. I gulped the water down without taking a breath. I waited a few minutes but I still felt like I was going to pass out.

“I'm taking you to the hospital. Come on.” He pulled me up gently off the couch.

I hated hospitals, but I knew I needed to go so I could get my baby checked out. The last few days had been very stressful and now all this shit that happened this morning.

We got into my car and he drove off. I laid my head back and just let my mind wander off. I couldn't believe the shit that went down this morning. That bitch was dead-ass wrong to come up in my shit behaving like that. Ayana knew that the old me would've trampled her ass.
She better be thankful that I'm pregnant and don't want to cause harm to my baby. I bet she would get satisfaction out of me losing my baby.

“You a'ight over there?” he inquired.

“Yes, just feeling a little queasy that's all.”

He put his hand on top of mine and rubbed it. “Babe, I love you and I ain't goin' nowhere. I just want you to know that!”

I didn't respond. I just smiled at him. I believed he loved me, but this was a hell of a love triangle that we were involved in. I knew how evil she could get and I knew shit was about to get ugly.