Yours Unfaithfully (46 page)

“Tim, if you stop talking for a moment you’ll be able to hear me ... that’s better ... I’ll see you in an hour, on the common where we met last Saturday, OK?”

‘That would be nice, really nice, I’ll see you in an hour.’ He ended the call and then thought about what he was doing. Nina had sounded so keen. She’d understood perfectly what he wanted, she was wasting no time.

He made his excuses and headed off for the Common, where he waited in the same spot as before. Twenty minutes later she arrived, parked next to him and got into the back of the Maybach. He was still seated in the front.

“Well ... what are you waiting for Tim?”

Nervously, he tried playing it cool. He knew he was unconvincing.

“I thought you might want a ride.”

“I do, so get yourself in the back before I run out of time. I told them in the office I had to go to the Town Hall to check out some searches. I can’t be too long, so let’s not waste what time I’ve got.”

Tim scrabbled into the back as if obeying orders. This episode was in danger of losing any semblance of romance.

She pulled at his clothes with an eagerness that was born of lust more than love. What followed was sex, not lovemaking, and although he proved well capable of meeting her demands he found himself feeling shabby straight after, not at all what he had expected. Nina seemed unperturbed by the lack of grace with which the session had been conducted and, after thanking, him made her excuses and drove off back to work.

Tim sat there for a while wondering what the last half hour had proved. One thing for sure was that some parts of his body were in full working order, but in his head he had an issue and he doubted whether this would be better because of what had just taken place.

He looked out across the common and watched a couple of blackbirds busily feeding from the grass. They were so obviously a couple, united in their struggle to find food, but keeping watch over each other like two lovebirds.

That was what was wrong at home. It had started when Mel was in Poland. He’d been convinced for a while that she was having an affair with this Rattani fellow, the one who’d insisted on her going on the trip. It was so obvious, she’d hardly had two words to say to him on the phone from her hotel, which could only have meant one thing… she was entangled with this man.

He was still bearing the scar of resentment for her going off like that, for her making herself available to him, for leaving him, her husband, to spend a month alone, without the love of his wife. She shouldn’t have done that, he was still upset about it and every time they made love the anger, the revulsion of her spending all that time away from him ate him up.

He would have to have it out with her ... he had to know, once and for all, what went on. He’d ask her tonight, surely she’d understand his fears, it was quite natural that he should want to know.

He started the engine and made his way back to the manor, but the only thing inside his head was the answer she would give. What if she said, ‘Yes I was unfaithful to you, Tim.’ What then?

That evening he waited for the right moment. What had seemed so simple as he sat in the sunshine on the Common now seemed impossible.

“Whatever it is, Tim, it must be very serious to make you look so unhappy. Do you want to tell me about it?”

This was it, decision time, either ask her now or forget the whole idea.

“I was just wondering about your trip to Poland. I want to know if it was what you’d expected or if there were any surprises, maybe unpleasant ones, that you didn’t enjoy.” He was skirting around the question, he knew that, but he’d lost his nerve, he’d never ask the question now and he’d never know the answer.

“You’re funny Tim, I already told you. I loved Poland, I loved Poznan and I loved the hotel and the lake. Next year I want to take you there, I want to show you just how lovely it is, and no, there were no unpleasant moments, all my memories of the trip are good ones.” She instinctively thought back to some of her better moments, the nights spent walking around the lake with Ratty, and one special night. She was quite certain; all her memories were good ones.

She’d pushed Ratty right out of her mind now, but Tim had forced her back to the lakeside and to some of the most romantic interludes of her life. Yes, you are supposed to do all that before you marry, that’s quite in order, but it can’t always be like that. Sometimes you meet someone special, but you don’t meet them until long after you’re married. Was it wrong to take those precious moments and to enjoy them briefly, would it make sense to deny yourself of the chance to have happiness on tap for a few days or nights?

Could you honestly look back later in life and say, ‘I’m glad I threw away the opportunity to have a few brief moments of loving with someone who loved me, who wanted me, who would have given up everything he owned to be with me?’ No, I regret nothing. She knew in that moment what Edith Piaf had meant in her immortal song, and like the sparrow she was adamant, she regretted nothing.

Tim seemed satisfied with her answer, although he’d unwittingly unleashed the memory of the very acts that he’d feared. His questions had an outcome tainted with the irony of a situation outside of his knowledge or indeed his control.

When he made love to Melanie that night he performed faultlessly, but their ecstasy wasn’t to be, as Melanie was unable to give herself willingly with her head full of thoughts of Poznan and of Ratty. It was she who found herself saying sorry now to an ever increasingly frustrated Tim, who felt that powerful forces were conspiring to prevent him returning to a normal life with Melanie.

Veronica sensed his misery as he drove her to the beach. She made him stop at a thatched cottage tea room in a small village near the sea and insisted he join her in a cream tea.

“What’s wrong, Tim. You can tell me anything and everything. After all, I’ll soon be leaving these shores, so your secrets are safe with me. And anyway, we were brought up to guard secrets to the grave, family honour and all that stuff, and you know I’d never tell Simon.”

He considered her point. She was right, and there was no one else to whom he could turn with his problems that wasn’t involved in some way or another. Not Ben, Nina or, of course Mel. He desperately needed to unburden himself and again she was right, in a few days she’d be off, back to Australia, which made her the perfect person to help him, and he found her easy to talk to and understanding. His mind was made up.

“It might take a while and you might find you don’t like me very much once you know me, properly I mean, once you know what I’m capable of.”

“Tim, don’t dramatise things, do you think I haven’t left a few skellies in my closet back there in Brisbane? If you’ve done something you’re ashamed of get it off your chest. You’ll feel a whole lot better and I promise you I won’t sit in judgment. If I can’t say anything helpful then I won’t say anything at all.”

Tim related the whole story, from the original row with Melanie, her trip to Poland and his adulterous affair with Nina. He left nothing out, even telling her how he’d used the car twice as a love nest when meeting Nina. When he’d finished his story she looked at him and said nothing for a while. He was afraid, afraid that he had gone too far, shocked her with his antics such that she could not countenance further conversation with him.

She looked at him and smiled, “Tim, you’re a fool ... welcome to the human race.”

“You must think I’m pretty low to have done what I’ve done?”

“Yea, sure, you’re lower than a snake’s belly, but so what? I told you, it isn’t for me to sit in judgment, and anyway I’ve done things every bit as bad in my lifetime. What we have to do is sort out where you go from here, right?”

“Right. Do you really think you can help me sort this mess out?”

“I’m sure I can. First, go and order more tea, this might take a little while.”

Over another pot of tea she gave Tim instructions, which she said he could either follow or ignore, but in the end he had to come to terms with what he wanted. Only when he knew that, could he find happiness.

Eventually he drove her back to the manor and prepared for his trip to Heathrow the next day to collect Simon and his wife. “I hope this won’t mean that we never get to talk again Veronica,” he said, “I’ve got used to you. I’ll miss you when you go.”

“Don’t worry, Tim, we’ll find plenty to talk about and even Simon can’t stop us talking.” She laughed at the thought of her brother trying to stop her from doing anything. After all her years in Brisbane, Simon held no fears for her, only a sadness born of many wasted years of their sibling non-contact.

That evening, as he walked into the kitchen his mind was a long way off, so when Melanie spoke he jumped.

“Nina’s in a right state, we’ve got to do something.”

“What’s she in a state about? His guilt fuelled his anxiety.”

“She thinks Ben’s run off with the kids. She’s been trying all day to phone him but no answer. She’s tried the kids phones but their not answering either. She thinks Ben’s taken their phones off them and is deliberately not answering. She wants you to try ringing him. She thinks he might answer you.”

Tim took out his phone and called the number, but it went straight to answering mode. “Maybe he’s turned it off. After all they are on holiday, or maybe his battery is flat. There is no way he would run off with the kids. I was surprised he even wanted to take them away for a couple of days.”

“But that’s what’s worrying Nina. It’s so unlike him to want to take them she thinks it’s part of a plan.”

“What plan? Ben’s not bright enough to have a plan.”

“I almost told her that but I stopped myself just in time.”

“You have to admit it is strange that he suddenly wanted to take them away.”

“Why? They’re his kids. Maybe he wanted to prove to Beckie that he can be a good father.”

“Or maybe, Tim, maybe he wants to blackmail Nina into dropping her claim on him with the CPA. Nina could take him for every penny. If she did he’d never be able to marry Beckie or afford to buy a square meal for them.”

“I can see that Nina could mess his life up with her claim, but I still can’t see how taking them away would change that.”

“What if he’s taken them out of the country?”

“Did he take their passports?”

“No, but he could have got them out on illegal ones, or maybe he just took a chance and smuggled them out in the back of his van. They hardly ever check people leaving the country. It would be quite easy.”

“But this is Ben we’re talking about. He’d never find his way to Dover, let alone to Spain or wherever. No he’s probably lost on the M6. Maybe he missed the turning for the Lakes and now he’s in the Scottish Highlands. Let’s have our meal and then we’ll go round and calm her down.”

They had barely finished the meal when Nina arrived. “I’m distraught Mel, what am I going to do?”

“If you really think he’s taken them for good then you need to ring the police.”

“They won’t do anything, Mel, They’ll say he’s got a perfect right to take them. They’ll say I have to go through the court to try and get them back, but that could take years.”

Tim tried to be helpful. “Why don’t you give it a couple more days? He might get in touch tomorrow?”

“Tim, I can’t sleep for worrying about them. I’m going up there to try and find them”

Melanie was horrified at the thought of her heading off to search for them on her own and she said so. “Neen, that’s crazy, you can’t go off on your own searching hundreds of square miles looking for five people and a tent, anything could happen to you.”

“I can’t stay here another minute, I’m going crazy with worry.”

“But do you have any idea where to start looking? Like the name of the camp site or anything?”

“No, but if I go to every campsite in the Lake District I’ll find them, if that’s where they are.”

“But what if he has taken them abroad, they won’t be there to find.” Tim was simply applying logic to the situation.

“You do think he’s taken them out of the country, don’t you?”

“No, but if he has, there’s not much point in searching up North is there?”

“I think he would have gone there first while he made his plans to get them out of the country. That way they wouldn’t suspect anything until it was too late.”

Melanie decided to take control of the situation. “Nina if you insist on going on this search then Tim will have to go with you. After all it’s his best mate that’s caused all this worry.”

“Mel, I can’t go off just like that. I’ve got to be at Heathrow in the morning to pick Simon and his wife up.”

“OK, you can do that, then tell him you need a couple of days off to help a friend find her lost children. If you explain how they might have been stolen I’m sure he’ll understand.”

“He’ll more likely think I’m mad.”

“Is that what you think I am, Tim? Mad? For wanting to know where my children are?”

“No, Neen, of course not, but I just think we’re jumping to conclusions without reason.”

“Tim, I’m a mother, ask Mel, she understands what I’m going through.”

“That’s right, Tim, you fathers have no idea what goes on in a woman’s body when she has children, or inside her head. If I was in Neen’s shoes I would be setting off to find them just like her.”

“I’ll do my best, but if he says I can’t have the time off, what then?”

“Then I’ll speak to him Tim, I’m sure he’d listen to your wife.”

“I’ll do what I can,” he said resignedly.

Melanie continued to console Nina while Tim made himself scarce.

The plane was on time at Heathrow and by nine o’clock they were heading back down the M3 Motorway. Simon was keen to know what had taken place while he’d been away.

Tim had a lot he wanted to say, as well as needing to ask him for time off. ‘Everything’s been fine while you’ve been gone. I’ve driven Veronica around quite a bit, I’ve become quite used to her. She’s not a bit like you described her.’

“That’s because you don’t know her, Tim.”

“Simon, I know I’m speaking out of turn here, but I think you’re wrong about your sister. I think it’s you who doesn’t know her, how can you? You haven’t spoken ten words to her in ten years, well not at a personal level anyway.”