Zenith Rising (33 page)

“What did Rob tell you?”

She leaned over and kissed his brow, noticing
his eyes were still closed. “Later. Not now. Just stay here until I
fall asleep.”

His arm came around her and he stayed there.
She fell asleep with his arms around her, his breath against her
hair. Her heart was almost sure he had to love her too, or he
wouldn’t have come back there today while she was still in his
house.

Chapter
Twenty-One

Spencer stayed with Erica until he felt her
body relaxing, as her breathing slowed steadily in and out, and
sheer exhaustion claimed her. He slid out from under her embrace
and stared down at her. Confused. Exhausted. Not knowing why he
still had her there.

He came downstairs, and found Rob finishing
up the lunch he made for work.

“What did you say to her?”

Rob paused. Then he lifted a jam-filled knife
to his mouth, licking it, and tossing it into the sink. He turned
back to Spencer. “I told her the truth.”

“Why? Why didn’t you mind your business? Why
were you even talking to her?”

“You’ve met her, right? Why don’t you tell me
how you say no to her? When she wants something, she knows how to
get it. Besides, she caught me at a weak moment.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I was naked, but for a pillow over the
family jewels, and thought it was just you banging at my door. I
was embarrassed, so I agreed to talk to her. Who was I to argue in
that vulnerable state?”

Spencer’s mouth tweaked at the picture. “She
does always get what she wants, somehow.”

“And she wants you.”

Spencer shifted his weight from one foot to
the next. “She’s confused. Caught up in this… whatever it is.”

Closing his lunch bag up, Rob stopped and
laughed. “Erica Heathersby confused? I doubt the woman has made a
single wrong turn, or committed a mistake in her entire life! If
she says she wants you, she means just that. Deal with it. You
couldn’t scare her away with all your blustering iciness. This one
stuck. And she saw past it all. Why you got so damn lucky is beyond
me. But you were, and you still are. Don’t fuck this up.”

Spencer watched as Rob slammed the door and
left. He was startled at Rob’s anger. Spencer was fully prepared to
let Rob have it and scold him for betraying him; but now Rob was
mad at him? What the hell?

He rubbed his head and glanced at the clock.
Speaking of work, he had to go. He grabbed Erica’s car keys and
left. Glad, for once, he had a job to escape to and think about.
Glad he could use it to banish all the thoughts about Erica from
his mind. Taking her car meant she’d still be there when he got
home. So what? It didn’t mean shit. Not all of his actions had to
have meaning behind them.

****

Spencer pulled Erica’s car into his driveway
after work. The house was bright, and the shades all open. He
usually didn’t bother with them. The front door was wide open, and
music from his stereo was playing. Shutting Erica’s car door, he
cringed at the loud sounds of the theme song from
Titanic
echoed from his house. Oh good God! What would the neighbors think
must have happened to Rob and him?

He came through the front door. Slamming it
shut.

“Erica?” he yelled after finding the kitchen
empty. All the shades in there were open too. He glanced out back
and found Erica finally. Their backyard was small, a postage
stamp-sized deck, with a weed-strewn lawn around it. She was on the
deck, in one of the dining room chairs, lounging, he supposed. Her
long legs were bare, and she had a book in her hands. He crossed
the living room and turned off the suddenly cresting tones about
how “the heart will go on.”

He sighed in relief as she sat up and finally
spotted him. She rose from the chair, and strolled through the open
sliding door.

“Jesus, Erica, I can’t trust you for a second
alone, can I?”

Startled, her smile vanished. He was grumpy,
and still in a foul mood after the morning’s fiascos. After the
humiliating revelations, the last person he wanted to see was
Erica. Erica was all long-legged, wearing a fluffy skirt she must
have brought in her overnight doctor bag. Her t-shirt was casual
and tight. Her hair looked all soft and shiny around her face. She
was barefoot. Barefoot in his damn house!

“What?”

“The front door was wide open, and the music
so loud, you didn’t hear me yelling. Anyone could have crept up
behind you and grabbed you before you even knew it.”

“That’s what you’re upset about? Who would
even have had a clue I’m here? It’s such a nice day outside, I felt
like letting the sunshine in.”

“You think you can just assume no one would
know you’re here? What if someone is making it his or her business
to know where you are? For such an intelligent doctor, sometimes
you surprise me with how stupid you can be.”

Okay, maybe not the best thing to say, since
her face clouded up. “Don’t talk like that to me.”

“Well, I don’t know how else to make you
believe me. Bad things happen, and you can’t always assume things
will be okay. You can’t be so clueless about your own safety. I
know you’re not exactly from the streets, but use a little common
sense! If not for yourself, then do it for me.”

She pursed her lips at him, but finally
nodded. “Okay; doors wide open not smart. I didn’t think about it.
I woke up, and it was stuffy in here, I wanted to air it out, and
enjoy the rarity of a summer day.”

He let out a long breath. All she ever wanted
was to live her life, and enjoy the day. She just wanted to find
happiness in her life. She was so honest, open, and wonderful, he
didn’t know why she let him breathe the same air as she. She didn’t
have the first clue about things that were dark and evil, which
could attack you, despite how sunny the day might be.

“Just think a little more about what you do.
Don’t give the person who attacked you once another
opportunity.”

Her eyes rounded. “You don’t think it could
happen again, do you?”

He rolled his eyes. “Of course, I think it
could happen again. Why do you think I’ve tried so hard to find out
who it was? Or why I’ve stuck so close to your side?”

“Oh. I guess I didn’t think about it
happening again.”

“Did you call the police today? About the
preacher and Tamira?”

“Yes. Even though I still think Tamira could
never do anything to hurt me.”

He nodded. Of course, she couldn’t believe
that. He eyed her all over. She looked as fresh and pretty as a
teenager sun-bathing. She looked relaxed, well rested, and happy
even. How could she? He didn’t get it. How could she be so happy at
his
house? “You look like you slept well.”

She nodded as she smiled up at him. That
smile did strange things to his heart and something squeezed inside
his chest.

“I did.”

“At least, someone did.” He grumbled as he
wandered into his kitchen and glanced around for something to do.
Eat. Drink. He had to figure out what to do now that Erica was
there. And his chest was feeling so weird.

And after the pivotal morning they
shared.

“Bad day at work?” She touched his shoulder
with her soft, capable, lovely, white hands.

He shrugged and ducked out from her grasp.
“Always. No different than ever. Don’t act like you don’t know what
my job is.” He decided on a beer, which he opened up.

“Right, the job again. You know, you took my
car again, so it’s your fault I’m still here.”

He shrugged and wandered over to the sliding
door where he glared out at the deck. The yard really looked like
shit. Why didn’t he and Rob ever plant a shrub or two? Cheer up the
dismal-looking space a bit?

“It’s a nice evening; why don’t we go for a
drive?”

“A drive?” He turned and looked at her as if
she were crazy.

“Yes. Why not? Nothing else to do, is
there?”

“No. Never is,” he said, shrugging, and
following her inside. He gritted his teeth when he found himself
watching how her skirt swayed back and forth at her knees. She
grabbed her keys.

“I think I’ll drive.”

He quirked an eyebrow. She never drove them
anywhere, even in her own car.

Once in the car, he still drank the beer,
despite her pointed look of disapproval. He didn’t care; he drank
it anyway. Ignoring her, he put sunglasses on to cut out some of
the sun’s glare. She drove slowly, cautiously, just like the music
she listened to. When she finally pulled onto the freeway, she
still didn’t speak and neither did he.

Suddenly, he sat up straighter. The area grew
familiar and he looked at her keenly. Her face showed nothing, just
her normal, pleasant expression.

“Where the fuck are you going?”

“Rob gave me the address,” she said, her
voice quiet, while her face suddenly flushed. At least, she didn’t
try to play dumb. Still, she drove. And soon, much too soon, she
stopped right across the street from the house Spencer fled at the
age of thirteen. He hadn’t been back since.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Just looking, Spencer. Just looking at a
house.”

“Fuck you, Erica,” he said harshly. He
sounded really mean. “You think because Rob told you a few things
about me that you know me now? Or you know what I need? You think
some kind of shock therapy will make me talk to you? Well, let me
tell you something: you don’t know anything, about me, my life, or
this. Do you hear me? You don’t know anything, you stupid, fucking
bitch.”

His words were loud and echoed in the car. To
her credit, she didn’t cower, or even flinch at his tone, or his
cruel words.

Despite his lack of composure, his gaze
looked past her to the house.
That house.
It looked the
same. Still ugly brown with white trim. Still shaggy, unmown grass,
and flowerbeds that needed weeding. It wasn’t a bad house, just
neglected, ignored, and kind of shabby. There was a new SUV in the
driveway, and a black cat lying on the front porch steps.

It was just a house.

Erica calmly put the car in gear, and did a
U-turn. She drove in silence and purposely stayed on some back
roads for a long while. Spencer didn’t pay attention, and his eyes
saw nothing. He felt nothing. Except anger. That, he felt that in
spades. There was a rage—seeing red behind his eyelids— kind of
rage and his breath came out in heavy gasps. His fists were
clenched.

He finally glanced up when the car stopped.
She parked on an empty shoulder that looked off towards Puget
Sound. There was no one around. The sun was beginning its descent,
sinking into the water, orange and bright. It was a peaceful,
isolated spot.

Then, suddenly, Erica crawled over the
console, onto his lap, facing him, her hands coming up around him,
and holding onto his neck. She pressed her face into his chest.
Right at his heart. He could feel her warm breath through his
t-shirt.

“I didn’t know how else to get you to talk to
me,” she said quietly. Afterwards, he just sat there, unmoving, his
fists still clenched at his sides and refused to put his hands on
her.

“I imagined if it were me, and that house
remained in my mind, what a thirteen-year-old would see. And maybe
seeing it now, as an adult, would remind you you’re not thirteen
anymore.”

“I think I already know that.”

“I think you don’t. I think you don’t know
how to talk about it. You push everyone away so you never have to.
Maybe this time, you won’t have to push me away.”

His jaw felt like it could shatter from the
pressure of his teeth gnashing, and he had suffocating feelings
that seemed to compress his chest.

“What happened the night you ran away? What
happened to Barry, Spencer?”

A deep breath filled his lungs, which he
expelled slowly and intentionally at the sound of his name.

“I don’t know. I didn’t stay around to find
out.”

“What did you do?”

“I hid a kitchen knife in my room and stabbed
him with it, without seeing, without thinking, and without ever
looking back. I fucking stabbed him and ran. I don’t know where I
hit, or what happened. If I killed him or just gave his arm a
prick. I don’t know. I grabbed my bag, got Rob, and never went
back.”

Erica lifted her head and her mouth found
his. She kissed his lips, his cheeks, and showered his face with
soft, soothing kisses. She was all filled with tenderness, and
gentleness, something he’d never craved or wanted before. But
suddenly, it became all he ever wanted. It made all the
difference.

“I hope you killed the bastard.”

He let out a laugh. It was the oddest
reaction, totally inappropriate for the darkness of the
conversation. But hearing the gentle doctor, the lifesaving Erica,
say that struck him as funny. No one else would have said it, or
meant it, like how it sounded coming from her. He finally raised
his hands to her waist.

“How long did it go on?” she asked after a
poignant moment.

“Only a few months.”

“There is no ‘only’ about this. I’m sorry. It
must have been horrible.”

“Brutal. I was able to fight him off
sometimes. Others, not. It never was easy.”

“Other times, he raped you.”

He flinched at her words. So blatant and out
there. Words no one ever spoke to him. Or knew about. Even Rob only
suspected, but never actually confirmed it.

Spencer couldn’t reply or address her
statement. But finally, he nodded. Betraying everything he believed
in: never reveal your weaknesses or your failures. Never give
anyone power over you, much less information. Not even your
history, since all of it could be used against you. Her arms
tightened around him and her tears dampened his shirt. Tears for
him. He hated it. All of it. Her sympathy. Her questions. Her
insistence that he remember. And admit it. And now, feel it.