Hercules: A Matter of Trust (4 page)

I
t was after nine that night and the sun was down, when Emily finally settled in to braid Sapphire. She'd been tied up in a family dinner for almost an hour, and then Caitlyn had insisted on showing Emily her ribbons, including her ribbon from her Maiden win, which she'd framed and put over her bed. Kyle had been with them, and he'd been making fun of Emily, but Caitlyn was so cute and so excited about Emily getting to ride Maiden, that Emily had actually felt better.

Caitlyn might be seven, but her total excitement that Emily was in their life was such a great ego boost. After hanging with Caitlyn, Emily had skipped the whole way to the barn to get Sapphire, still chuckling
at Caitlyn's protests when Aunt Debby had said it was too late for Caitlyn to go to the barn and hang out with Emily. At least there was one person at the barn under more restrictions than Emily!

And now Sapphire was cross-tied in his stall, and she had filched a step stool from the supply room. Despite Sapphire's aversion to being cross-tied, Emily had been forced to do it, because it was impossible to braid a squirmy horse, and Sapphire was the king of squirmy.

She'd given him a carrot and apologized, and he'd seemed to forgive her. And now the barn was quiet except for the contented sounds of horses bedding down for the night. The fresh scents of hay and pine shavings wrapped around Emily, making her feel cozy and warm. There was no one around at all, making Emily feel like she owned the place. She could almost pretend she was the boss and no one would tell her what to do.

She used her comb to part a three-quarter-inch section of Sapphire's mane, and glanced out at the aisle again. The empty aisle. All hers. Her rules!

Sapphire snorted and she jumped at the sudden noise, losing her grip on the braid. She turned around to laugh at herself with someone, then remembered that she was there alone.

Yeah. Alone.

Emily realized that she loved the privacy, but in her old barn, it never took long before her friends showed up to braid their own horses. That was when they all owned the barn together. Played music. Told jokes. Planned for the next day.

Emily sighed and slid the pulling comb through Sapphire's mane to separate another small section to braid. She missed her friends. Even Jenny Smith, who she hated half the time. Missed belonging…

There was a thud from the aisle, and Emily peered toward the sound. “Hello?”

Meredith marched by Sapphire's stall. “I can't believe you're in here alone!” Meredith plunked an iPod player with speakers on a hay bale. “You can't braid by yourself! Too boring!” She hit play, and the high-energy beat of the Xtremes echoed through the barn. “Now, that's fun!”

Meredith threw up her arms and started dancing; happiness swelled in Emily's chest. “Took you long enough to get here,” she teased Meredith,
so happy
to have company.

Emily began singing along with the music, laughing at Meredith's horrible dancing. Sapphire threw up his head and swished his tail, and Emily grinned. “Sapphire's dancing, too.”

“Of course he is. The boy has good taste.” Meredith held up her finger. “Don't stop singing. I'll be right back.”

Emily leaned around the stall door, watching as Meredith ran off, unable to contain her glee. Now
this
was what the night before a show was supposed to be like!

She was still tapping her foot when Meredith reappeared, leading Halo, and carrying a feed bucket and some braiding supplies. Meredith started singing again as she hooked Halo up to the aisle cross ties outside Sapphire's stall, then she hopped up on an inverted white bucket so she could see what she was doing with the braids. She held up dark green, navy, and black yarn. “What color?”

There were choices? Emily had done black because she always wore black for dressage. “What color is your jacket?”

“I have all colors.” Meredith studied the yarn. “I think I'll go with my green jacket and beige breeches tomorrow. This green's a little slanted toward the hunter side, but that's okay.” She tossed the other two skeins over her shoulder without even looking where they were landing, and Emily laughed as one of them landed in a water bucket with a splash.

Meredith giggled. “Oops.” She began looping the yarn around her elbow and hand to cut a bunch of pieces to the correct length, and she wandered over to Sapphire as she did it. “Can I see?”

“Sure.” Emily jumped off the stool she'd used and stepped aside, suddenly getting a little nervous. What if her braids weren't good enough?

Meredith climbed on the step stool and peered at the braids, then let out a low whistle. “I can't wait to see Debby's face when she sees these.”

“Really? Are they bad?”

Meredith hopped down. “I don't think I've ever seen so many braids.”

“That's good, right?”

“It's incredible. Those braids are so tight and even. Want to do Halo's? I'll pay you twenty bucks and be your friend?”

Emily smiled and relaxed as she climbed back up. “No, thanks. I still have to do Moondance after this.”

“Moondance? You showing her?” Meredith cut the yarn and then draped the bunch over Halo's withers.

“Yep.” Emily decided not to mention it was in the Maiden class, and instead focused on sliding her metal pulling comb through Sapphire's mane, making a perfect part about three quarters of an inch down from
the last braid. She stuck the comb in her back pocket, divided the hair into three even segments, then began to braid, pulling the hair as tightly as she could. When she was about halfway down, she started to weave the black yarn into the braid.

“Maiden?” Meredith asked.

Emily grimaced. “Yeah.”

Meredith nodded. “You'll win, no problem.”

Emily's embarrassment faded at the total confidence in Meredith's voice. “You think?”

“Absolutely. You—”

“Hi, guys.” Alison walked down the aisle, leading a gorgeous gray horse covered in dapples. The tips of his ears and his nose were dark gray. His mane and tail were black with specks of white, and his coat was this awesome mixture of coal gray and bright white dapples.

For a gray horse to be that dark, the horse had to be quite young, because the older they got, the more white they turned. Like Max, who was almost pure white now.

Emily had never seen the horse before and she knew instantly that he was an expensive animal. “Who's that?”

Alison hooked the horse up to aisle cross ties so
he was facing Halo. “He's my new horse. His show name's Black Ice, and I'm calling him Icy. He arrived yesterday.”

“Wow.” Meredith let out a sigh of appreciation. “He's gorgeous.”

“Yours?” Emily frowned. “As in yours to train for resale?”

“Nope.” Alison climbed up on a step stool and began to comb through Icy's mane. “He's mine. We sold my old horse during the winter, and we've been looking for a replacement ever since. We wanted a young one with lots of potential, and we finally found him a couple weeks ago. Isn't he fantastic? You should see him jump. He can trot four-foot oxers.” She looked so very pleased. “He's got springs for legs.”

Emily felt more than a pang of jealousy as Alison began to braid Icy's mane. Both Meredith and Alison had their own horses? Beautiful horses they could train and take to shows and compete on? And Emily was stuck riding school horses and hoping for Aunt Debby to grant her a chance to show them. In New Jersey
she
was the one who had the great horse and did all the shows. She liked being
that
girl a lot better!

“Good song.” Alison began to wiggle in place on her step stool as another Xtremes song came on the player.
“This group kicks. I downloaded a few of their tracks onto my playlist. I've been dying to hear this one.”

Meredith started snapping her fingers and throwing her hips side to side. “You're showing Icy tomorrow?”

“I don't know yet. At the moment the plan is to ride him around the show grounds and see how he reacts to all the craziness. We might try a class or two if he seems to be adjusting, so we can get an idea of where he is. We'll play it by ear.” Alison started to sing along to the song then stopped. “Oh, I forgot. I ordered pizza for us. Should be here in about a half hour. Hope you all didn't eat too much at dinner.”

Pizza? Emily's stomach started to grumble at the thought of it, despite the burger she'd eaten not so long ago. There was just something about pizza at night that was so delicious. “Thanks for doing that, Alison.” She felt a little shy speaking up, still intimidated by her cousin, even though she was only one year older than Emily. They'd started to break through the ice, but Emily still felt a little insecure around her, especially now that she knew Alison had her own horse. A gorgeous horse that trotted four-foot oxers. Oxers were jumps that had a front rail and a back rail, making the jump wide as well as high, which meant it was a
big
jump.

Alison gave her the thumbs-up. “Barn tradition.
Pizza for the braiders the night before the show. On my mom.”

A new song came on the player, and Emily grinned as Alison and Meredith let out simultaneous squeals. “I love this song!”

Both of them started to sing at the top of their lungs while they braided, and after a minute, Emily joined in. The beat of the drums thudded in her belly, Alison's feet were stomping in rhythm on her wooden step stool, and even Sapphire was shaking his head.

Emily chuckled as she tied another braid, still shouting out the song as she watched Alison and Meredith dancing in the aisle, their fingers flying over the braids.

She hadn't realized how
much
she missed her friends at her old barn, how much she missed the camaraderie. She wouldn't call Alison a friend yet, but Meredith was getting there….

“Oh, and Emily?”

Emily looked at Alison. “Yes?”

“Mom figured you didn't have the right clothes for riding in a hunter/jumper show, so you can go through my closet and pick out some of my old stuff to wear.”

“Oh, me too,” Meredith said. “I was just getting rid of some of my stuff, so I can bring that in the morning, too.”

Emily blinked in surprise at their offer, glad she didn't have to accept wearing someone else's stuff that was so old that even they weren't wearing it anymore. There was something about hand-me-downs that made riding a borrowed horse in beginner class even more humiliating. She needed to be in power mode tomorrow, not hand-me-down mode. “Thanks, but I have nice stuff of my own….” Her words faded as she realized she hadn't brought any of her show stuff with her from New Jersey, anyway. With the show in the morning, she didn't have time to get it. What had she been thinking? She hadn't even
thought
about show clothes!

Alison raised her brows. “You can't wear that funky dressage stuff in the show tomorrow. You'll look…odd. It would make the barn look like we don't know what we're doing, and Mom would never go for that. Really, I don't mind. Come up to my room later, and we can go through and find something that will fit you okay.”

And just like that, the night stopped being quite so fun.

I
t was almost midnight by the time Emily got back to her room with her borrowed hand-me-downs for the show. She folded her arms and studied the assortment of riding clothes on her bed, trying to think of something positive about the situation.
Anything
positive. “Well, at least no one will mistake me for an arrogant, rich snob.”

She snorted at herself. Yeah. Three cheers for that.

There were two jackets and three pairs of breeches from Alison. All of them were faded and worn, and none of them fit Emily quite right. She sighed with longing, thinking of the beautiful clothes she had for dressage shows, how perfect she was accustomed to looking. She
thought of what her coach, Les, would say if he saw her enter the ring wearing clothes that looked like hand-me-downs. He'd say she shouldn't even bother to compete, because the image she presented when she entered the ring would doom her.

Emily bit her lip and thought of beautiful Sapphire. His braids looked fantastic, probably the best braid job she'd ever done. Even Moondance's had been pretty good, even though she'd been so tired by then.

But even Moondance's were worthy of a rider who didn't look frumpy. And Sapphire…she so wouldn't be worthy of standing in his shadow.

Oy. She was going to be Frumpy Girl tomorrow.

There was nothing inspiring about being Frumpy Girl. Frumpy Girl would come in last. No one would kiss the toes of Frumpy Girl.

She scratched her collarbone and tried to figure out what she could do to ditch the Frumpy Girl mind-set and become Winner Girl instead….

The door was suddenly flung open, and Emily turned to see her younger cousin Caitlyn. Caitlyn's eyes were sparkling, and she was wearing a pink nightgown with a pinto horse on the front. “Emily!”

Emily smiled at her little cousin. “What's up?”

“I can't go to the show tomorrow because I'm going
to my friend Tanya's birthday party, so I wanted to wish you good luck!” Caitlyn then threw herself at Emily and gave her a giant hug that nearly knocked Emily over.

Emily laughed and peeled Caitlyn off her, feeling better. “Thanks. I appreciate it.”

“You'll do awesome—” Caitlyn stopped and cocked her head, and they heard Aunt Debby calling for her. “Oops. Gotta go to bed. Bye!” She raced out, slamming the door shut behind her, leaving Emily chuckling.

Well, maybe seven-year-old girls would kiss the toes of Frumpy Girl.

There was a light tap at the door. “Em?”

She stiffened at her dad's voice. “What?”

“Can I come in?”

She sighed, trying to pretend she wasn't still upset by his treatment of her this afternoon. “Whatever.”

The door opened, and her dad peered in. His light brown hair was tousled, longer than she'd ever seen it before, and he
still
hadn't shaved. But his blue eyes were bright, almost glowing, an expression she realized she hadn't seen ever before. He looked…alive. Yeah, that was it. He'd never been truly alive before they'd come back to the farm? The way he looked made her feel good.

“Hi, Em.” He smiled at her. He looked happy. Truly happy.

“How come I never made you this happy?” The words tumbled out before she could stop them, and she felt bad when the happiness fell off his face.

“What are you talking about?”

“You.” She turned away from him and began gathering the borrowed clothes off the bed. “You look happy. Weren't you ever happy when it was only the two of us? I wasn't enough for you?”

“Em!” Her dad's hand fell on her shoulder and he caught her wrist with the other, stopping her efforts to shrug him off. “Look at me.”

She bit her lip and looked up at him, at the face of the person who'd been her only family her whole life until they'd popped into the farm a few weeks ago and she'd met family that were strangers.
His
family. “What?”

“You make me happy, sweetie. You always have.” He held up his finger when she started to talk. “But it's a nice feeling to be back with my family again, to be on the farm where I grew up. But it's only a nice feeling because you're here with me.” He cupped her chin. “Do you understand? Without you, I'd hate it here. You're my number one, hon, and you always will be.”

Emily's eyes filled up. “Then why won't you stand up to Aunt Debby and tell her how great I am? That she can trust me?”

“Aw, Em.” Her dad sat down on the bed. “It's different out here. The horses are the livelihood of this ranch. They come first.”

She didn't sit down. “And I'll hurt them?”

He looked at her, and she saw a firmness in his gaze she'd never seen. “Emily, riding Rhapsody in a dressage class is not the same thing as dealing with abused and neglected horses or jumping even a well-trained horse. It takes time to build those skills, and I feel that Aunt Debby is a more unbiased judge of your readiness than I am, so I defer to her. If it were up to me, I'd let you ride any horse you want in any class you want, and I'm not sure that would be the best thing for you.”

She narrowed her eyes, steeling herself against his words. She couldn't let herself believe it. “So at the show tomorrow, you won't stand up for me? What if I do well in the Maiden class? Then will you tell Aunt Debby she should enter me in another class?”

“I'm not going to the show.”

She stared at him, too stunned to know what to say. Her dad had never missed a show.
Ever.

“I need to stay at the farm and take care of the horses.
There are too many at-risk animals here right now, and both Aunt Debby and I can't be away.”

“But—”

He smiled, but there was an element of sadness in his gaze. “Trust me, Emily, I wish I could go. But you'll be okay without me, and the horses need me more than you do.”

“No, they don't! I need you! You're my
dad
!”

“I'll always be your dad, Em, but you're a big girl now, and you'll have Aunt Debby there.”

“She hates me!”

His smile faded. “Now, Emily, I've had enough of you saying bad things about Aunt Debby. She doesn't hate you; she's a good person and an excellent horsewoman and you need to trust her judgment as I do.”

She blinked hard at the tears rising in her eyes and clenched her fists against the urge to cry, to beg him to be the way he used to be.

“But I brought you something.” He got off the bed and walked out into the hall, then came back with a dress bag. “For you.”

She frowned, trying to shift thoughts. “What is this?”

“Open it.”

She set the garment bag on the bed and unzipped
it, then gasped when she saw a brand-new, navy riding jacket and a pair of rust breeches with suede knee pads and the tag still on. And a crisp, white long-sleeved shirt with a choker collar. “Dad!”

He reached behind the door again, then tossed her a hatbox. “I knew you didn't have any clothes for the show, so I stopped in town and picked up some things for you. I called the tack store in New Jersey to find out your sizes, so I hope they work.”

Emily ripped the box open and held up a black helmet, the velvet intact and beautiful. “It's incredible!” She tossed it on the bed and threw herself at him, burying her face in his chest while his arms wrapped around her and hugged her tight. “Thank you so much.”

He chuckled and kissed the top of her head. “It's to make up for the fact I'm not going tomorrow. Forgiven?”

She grinned up at him. “No.”

He ruffled her hair, and got a more serious look on his face. “There's one more thing.”

“What?”

He dug into his back pocket and pulled out a little box wrapped in newspaper. “For you.”

It was her dad's typical wrapping job, and seeing the crooked newsprint made her feel better. More secure.
Maybe her dad was changing, but he was still her dad in the little ways.

She sat down on the bed and carefully opened it as the mattress shifted when her dad sat next to her.

It was a small white jewelry box, and when she lifted the lid, she saw a silver choker pin for her riding shirt. It was a profile of a horse's head set inside a horseshoe. The horse was braided and tacked up, clearly ready for a show. The silver was polished and shiny, but there were scratches on it, and the edges were worn.

“That was your mom's choker pin.” Her dad's voice was gruff.

“Mom's?” He'd never given her anything belonging to her mom before, not even a photo. She'd died when Emily was two, so Emily didn't remember her, and her dad never talked much about her…until now. “She rode horses?”

“Yep.” Her dad carefully took the pin out of the box and flipped it over. “I gave this to her for her sixteenth birthday. Before we'd even started dating. We were just friends back then.”

Emily saw an engraving on the back, and she took the pin and held it to the light by the bed to read it. “To O. Love, S.”

Olivia. Her mom. Scott. Her dad.

“She wore it for every show, and when we moved away, she wore it on the lapel of her jackets when we went out for dinner.” He brushed his finger over it. “I kept it for a long time, and now it's your turn to have it. She'd want you to wear it.” He cleared his throat and stood up. “Now, it's off to bed. You have an early rise tomorrow, kiddo.”

Emily bunched her fist around the pin and looked up. “Thanks, Dad.”

He chucked her lightly on her shoulder. “You'll do great tomorrow.”

“I wish you were going.”

Regret flickered across his face. “So do I, hon. Maybe next time.”

“
Maybe?
This isn't the only one you're going to miss?”

“I don't know. We'll see.” He pecked her cheek, then slipped out of the room before she could protest even more.

But she'd seen the guilt on his face, and she knew the answer.

The pin and the clothes…they were guilt gifts, like she'd seen her friends at her old barn get all the time from their parents who were too busy to bother with the kids. But not her dad. He'd always been there.
Always
.

And now he was giving her guilt gifts instead.

She looked down at the pin in her hand and grinned.

But they were really, really good ones.