The Guarded Heart (5 page)

Chapter 10

August 2015

Clint dropped his keys in the bowl on the counter and his hands shook as he covered his face to smother a scream as incredible relief mingled with anxiety. He pressed his hand against the center of his chest and began to pace as he replayed every minute of his conversation with Ryder. He wanted so badly to go back and freeze time so he could just stare at him and breathe the same air. He looked so
good.
It was like going home, standing next to him and hearing his voice.

Could Jonathan track him down? Clint tempered his hopes as he went to the fridge and grabbed a bottle of water. His stomach felt tight and cold but his mouth was dry and there was a good chance he might cry. He fell onto the couch and his eyes found the window and went distant as he pictured Ryder and committed every feature to memory. He groaned in disappointment and frustration as all the things he should have said rushed at him. Barkley hopped onto the couch and turned a few times before falling onto his side and stretching on the seat along Clint’s thigh. Clint sighed as he scratched the spot just above Barkley’s tail.

“I saw him,” Clint whispered and Barkley’s ear stuck up. “I don’t know how I’m going to do it, but I’m going to bring him home,” he promised and Barkley’s ear twitched and Clint smiled softly. It took months for Barkley to stop moping and looking at Clint as if he set his favorite Lamb Chop toy on fire. Clint wasn’t convinced that Barkley had totally forgiven him. “I have to get him back.”

Chapter 11

January 2013

Clint

I think you left something at my place.

Ryder

What?

Clint

I haven’t figured it out yet.

Ryder

You could just say you want to see me again.

Clint

I want to see you again. Come over.

Ryder

I can’t. I’m grading spelling tests, baking granola and making jam.

Clint

Jam? Seriously?

Ryder

Gooseberry and Elderflower. Booty call at my place?

Clint

Wow. A slutty ghetto Martha Stewart text.

Ryder

Did it work?

Clint

What’s your address?

Ryder

Yessss! 4267 Keppler Ave Apt 2C

The facade of the building was not encouraging. It was typical for the historic district by the college. It was a sagging, faded brick dump. Clint felt a little skeevy, pushing his way through a stream of sloppy twenty-somethings and ducking into the dingy entryway. The building leaned and Clint felt a little dizzy as he climbed the stairs to the second floor. He tried not to look too self conscious as he passed a goth couple and nearly turned back when he got to the box of kittens at Ryder’s door. He knocked and a loud voice sang
Bump And Grind
before the door swung open.

“Well, helloooooo,” Jared drawled as he leaned against the door frame and Clint waved stiffly as he looked over his shoulder nervously.

“Is Ryder there?” He asked and Jared snorted.

“Yes. Are you sure you want to settle for Mr. Vanilla? I mean, he’s making goddamned granola,” he said as he waved toward what was probably the kitchen and Clint’s eyes flared.
Mr. Vanilla?
There was a lot Jared didn’t know about Ryder.

“Jared!” Ryder yelled and Jared sighed as he stepped aside and waved Clint through.

“We could have a really good time…” Jared purred in Clint’s ear and Clint leaned away.

“I like vanilla,” he muttered as Ryder rushed into the living room.

“Get out,” he said as he tossed a coat at Jared. He caught it and rolled his eyes as he put it on.

“I’ll be back at 10:00, it’s a school night,” he said and Ryder held up a hand, signaling for Jared to wait before he ran into the kitchen. He reappeared a moment later with an opened can of cat food and handed it to Jared.

“Put that out for Miss Kitty,” he said and Jared’s nose wrinkled as he nodded.

“You give her meat,” he grumbled as he pulled the door open and Ryder grinned at Clint.

“Push a bunch of kittens out of your dick and I’ll cook you a steak,” he said loudly as the door slammed.

“Bitch!” Jared yelled and Clint winced as he pinched the bridge of his nose. When he finally looked around he didn’t feel any better.

“Don’t they pay you?” He asked as he eyed a stack of pallets that served as a table and two mismatched stools. A ragged quilt covered what Clint could only assume was an even more ragged futon and a wooden cable spool acted as a coffee table. One wall was lined with books on mason block shelves and an ancient console TV and a lawn chair made his eye twitch.

“Sure. Why?” Ryder asked as he went into the kitchen and Clint frowned as he followed.

“Why don’t you have furniture? You’re living like a homeless college student,” he said and Ryder shook his head as he turned off the burner on what might have been the smallest oven Clint had ever seen.

“As we’re standing in an apartment I pay rent to inhabit, I would argue that I’m not homeless. And I have furniture,” he said as he grinned cockily over his shoulder before he bent over and pulled a pan out of the oven. At least whatever Ryder was working on smelled good. He gave the pan a shake and put it back in the oven and turned off the heat.

“You pay to live here?” Clint asked and Ryder shrugged as he stirred the contents of a large pot then raised the spoon. He nodded then pushed the pot off the burner and Clint stepped back as Ryder turned.

“I haven’t seen a spool used as a table since college,” Clint grumbled as he followed Ryder into the living room and he laughed as he pulled off his faded red hoodie then waved for Clint to follow as he went down a narrow hall.

“You had a spool table?” He asked over his shoulder and Clint frowned as he shook his head.

“Fuck, no. I did see one though,” he said and Ryder laughed again as he turned into the bedroom. He tossed the hoodie onto a dresser and Clint did his best to ignore the missing drawer and looked at the bed. It was just a mattress on a frame, pushed against the window but the sheets looked clean. He raised a brow and pointed at the string of lights framing the bed and window and Ryder winked as he kicked off his shoes.

“Fairy lights,” he said and Clint gave him a flat look. “You should see Jared’s room, they’re everywhere. His dumb ass is going to burn the place down,” Ryder said as he pulled his t-shirt over his head and Clint’s lips twisted.

“He lives here too?” He asked and Ryder nodded as he gestured for Clint to take off his shirt. He thought about saying no until Ryder’s head tilted and he bit the side of Clint’s neck. He leaned back and Clint obediently pulled his shirt over his head and Ryder hummed as his hands glided down Clint’s chest. Clint shivered and heat pooled in his groin. “Did you two ever…?” He asked hoarsely as Ryder’s hand wrapped around his hard-on and squeezed and Ryder shook his head.

“Nope,” he said as he flicked the button free then unzipped Clint’s pants as he backed him toward the bed. “Can I fuck you?” he asked as he reached into Clint’s jock and released his erection. Clint groaned and nodded as heat burst under his skin and a tingling sensation throbbed deep in his ass. Ryder licked his lips as his hand tightened around Clint’s cock and stroked. “Good. I’m going to need to swallow your dick first,” he said and Clint gasped as Ryder pushed against his chest and he fell back on the bed.

“Are you always like this?” Clint asked and Ryder shook his head and dropped to his knees.

“I’m feeling the slutty ghetto Martha Stewart thing,” he said and Clint laughed.

“I take it back after seeing this place,” he teased then hissed as Ryder’s tongue slid up the length of his cock. Clint’s pants and shoes hit the floor and his fingers twisted in the sheets as Ryder’s beard brushed against his thigh.

“All of it?” Ryder asked and Clint bit his lip and his shoulders came off the bed as Ryder’s tongue swept along the cleft of his ass.

“It’s definitely ghetto,” he panted and Ryder pouted as he sucked on his fingers.

“Am I slutty?” He asked as his fingertips pressed against Clint’s puckered entrance. He took Clint deep into his throat as they pushed past the tight ring and Clint’s toes curled as Ryder’s fingers curved around his prostate.

“So, so slutty!” Clint cried and Ryder sucked hard as he reached deep. “Oh, fuck. That’s good,” Clint moaned and writhed on the bed as Ryder’s fingers stroked firmly in time with the rise and fall of his head. The tiny lights turned into fireworks as Ryder fingered Clint’s ass until his legs started to shake.

“On your knees,” Ryder commanded as he leaned back and Clint nodded drunkenly as he rolled over and got his knees beneath him.

He watched over his shoulder as Ryder stretched a condom over the head of his cock then coated it with a generous amount of lube. Clint let his head fall as Ryder rose on his knees and positioned himself behind Clint. He relaxed and exhaled slowly as Ryder pushed into his tight hole. Ryder made a soft shushing sound and traced slow, soothing circles all over Clint’s back until he relaxed.

“You don’t have to do that,” Clint murmured.

“Hmm?” Ryder hummed as he thrust deep and Clint’s eyelids fell as Ryder’s thick length filled his passage and a current of warmth rolled down his legs.

“You don’t have to be so gentle and wait,” Clint explained. “I can take it,” he said and Ryder chuckled.

“I know. I get the feeling you’re used to guys just going for it and I think you deserve to have someone take their time with you,” he said and Clint didn’t let that sink in. He shook his head, dismissing the thought before it could take up any space in his brain.

“You always want it really hard,” he pointed out and gasped as Ryder drove deep.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve been with someone that can ride me that hard,” he said and Clint would have laughed or said something witty if he could have made his mouth work. Ryder had found his prostate and was grinding against it. “Do you want me to fuck you really hard?” He asked and Clint nodded.

“Jeesusss, yesss!” He slurred as he grabbed the edge of the mattress and braced himself. And holy shit, Ryder fucked Clint hard. His hips slapped into Clint’s ass so hard his skin started to sting and Clint was afraid the bed frame would break, it made so much noise. Clint almost blacked out when he came and his arms and legs were smoked by the time Ryder was finished. Clint grunted as he crashed face first into the pillows then hummed drowsily as Ryder’s tongue lapped at the sweat between Clint’s shoulder blades.

“You taste incredible.” Ryder growled as he nibbled and sucked on the back of Clint’s neck.

“Thank you,” Clint murmured as he rolled onto his back and grabbed a handful of Ryder’s hair and pulled his lips to his. Their tongues twisted lazily as they rolled and Clint pinned Ryder beneath him.

“We have about an hour until Jared gets back,” he mumbled as he pecked at Ryder’s lips and he felt them curve.

“Give me a few minutes to catch my breath,” he said as his leg wrapped around Clint’s thigh then winced. “I might need more than a few minutes to rest, I may have pulled something,” Ryder admitted and Clint chuckled as he licked Ryder’s shoulder.

“Go ahead, I’ll entertain myself while I wait,” he whispered then traced Ryder’s collar bone with his tongue. “I don’t know how you can get any rest in this bed, it’s terrible,” Clint complained and Ryder shook his head as his fingernails grazed Clint’s back.

“It’s not that bad,” he said and Clint snorted as his tongue slid up Ryder’s throat. “It’s one of the best free mattresses I’ve ever had,” Ryder said and Clint’s head snapped up.

“Free?” He asked and Ryder nodded.

“I spotted it on craigslist as soon as the people said they were putting it on the curb and I swooped in and snagged it,” he declared and Clint pushed off the mattress and rolled off the bed.

“What?” He screamed as he pressed himself against the wall and Ryder held his hands up soothingly as he slid off the bed.

“It’s totally cool,” he insisted and Clint’s mouth fell open. “The worst of the stains are on the underside,” Ryder promised and Clint pointed wildly and shook his head.

“No! That is not cool, Ryder!” He yelled. “Bedbugs!” Clint rushed across the room and flicked the light switch and turned in circles as he did his best to see his back.

“There aren’t any bedbugs,” Ryder said before his lips twisted. “How can you tell if there are bedbugs?” He asked and Clint shrieked as he dove for his pants.

“They’re bugs! You can’t miss them!” He stepped into his pants and glared at Ryder as he zipped.

“Come on! I vacuumed and Fabreezed it. I’m sure I’d know if there were bedbugs, I’ve had it for six months,” he said and Clint swore under his breath as he stuffed his jockstrap in his pocket.

“Do you have any idea how many dead skin cells are probably in that thing?” He asked as he grabbed his shirt and shook it out and Ryder shrugged.

“So? Are they any different than mine?” He asked and Clint’s head pulled back in disgust.

“Yes! They’re not yours! They came from other people!” He pulled his shirt on and grabbed his shoes before he stormed from the room and Ryder followed.

“Ok. But if I were to look at them side by side, I wouldn’t know whose is whose,” he said and Clint’s hand dragged over his mouth.

“What are you talking about?” He asked before he pointed at the futon. “Do I want to sit on that?” He asked and Ryder shook his head quickly.

“Noooo,” he said and Clint glared as he leaned against the wall and pulled on his shoe.

“You are a grown goddamned man, Ryder,” he said then switched feet. “Buy some decent fucking furniture,” Clint said and Ryder snorted.

“Why? People throw away perfectly good stuff all the time and I can make whatever I can’t find for free,” he said and Clint shook his head as he scratched his arm.

“Oh, my God. I’m itching.” He narrowed his eyes at Ryder as he pulled the door open. “Never again,” Clint promised and Ryder’s brows rose. “We do this at my house from now on,” he said then jumped when Miss Kitty rubbed against his leg. “I swear to God, if Barkley gets fleas, you’re paying for his grooming and an exterminator,” he declared and Ryder cringed.

“Call me tomorrow?” He asked and Clint shook his head.

“I have to go home and burn all of this. Then, I’m scrubbing my skin raw. I’m going to need a few days,” he said before he slammed the door shut behind him.