A Girl Like Me (22 page)

“It's over, Quamir. This who you choosing?” I pointed over his shoulder. “You can have that stank ho! We through! You ain't nothin'; you don't take care of your son no way. Mama's boy! Trying so hard to be a playa but can't get outcha mama's basement. Your whole existence is a joke. I don't know whether to laugh in your face or spit in it.”

I turned around to walk away, and Quamir yanked me by my hair so hard that I was dizzy. Seven and Tay immediately jumped between us. I looked at the rage in Quamir's eyes and I knew he wasn't playing. My heart thumped in my chest. “It's cool,” I said to them as they stood in front of me.

“I been waitin' to kick yo' azz!” Tay said.

“Tay!” I snapped. “Chill. Y'all move and let me hear what he got to say.” Before they could move on their own, Quamir pushed them to the side and stood in front of me.

“Who you talkin' to, Toi?” he said, sounding more like my father than my man.

I didn't answer.

“Don't you ever in your stupid life talk to me like that! You so stupid and dumb. This why don't nobody else want you! And no matter how I keep tryna stay with you, you keep actin' dumb! You need to get outta my business, retarded ho! You came around here actin' like a clown and all we gon' do is laugh at you.”

“Don't be talking to her like that!” Seven screamed.

“You the stupid one!” Tay said.

“I know you ain't talkin' to me, you crazy ass, crack-head baby!” he spat with a sinister laugh.

“And what are you, Quamir?” Seven said. “At least Tay got an excuse.”

Tay blinked her eyes. “Excuse me?”

“Ho, please,” Quamir snorted. “I'm definitely not gon' argue with no virgin.”

Feeling as if I was due to pass out at any minute, I fought with all I had to at least sound strong. “Boy, please. You been with this raggedy ho all week, and you talkin'!” The tears dancing in my throat stopped me mid-sentence. “This really yo' baby mama, Quamir?”

“Did I tell you I had another baby? Uh, answer me!”

Silence.

“Answer me!” he screamed.

“No!”

“Well then, why you assuming things?”

“What?” Shanice screamed, a flood of tears streaming down her face. “So what is you sayin'? That we don't have a son?” She punched him in his chest. “You sayin' he ain't yours?”

“Stupid tramp!” I tossed in the wind. “This broad really got a baby by you?” Suddenly, I felt like my son had been reduced to nothing. He wasn't the oldest, he wasn't the youngest, he wasn't even the one by the baby mama his daddy loved. He was just one of Quamir's kids. “You ain't nothing, Quamir! Matter of fact, it doesn't even matter what you do 'cause I'm out!”

“And I'm done with you, too,” Shanice said. “I'm sick of you cheating on me!”

“Hos is always schemin',” Quamir said. “Man, please. Both y'all knew the deal and now you tryna act like you ain't know about the other? Now if you wanna stomp each other, then don't talk about it, be about it!” He stepped from in front of me. “What I care!”

Shanice started going off on Quamir, but I stood there. Stunned. Embarrassed. Wishing I could fly away and nobody would see me. Although he hadn't hit me, I felt like I'd been beaten. Why would he play me like this? What happened to him falling on his knees and telling this chick I was wifey?

I became anxious and didn't know what to do, where to turn, or how to act. I thought about crying but couldn't get any tears to come out. Then I thought about dying, but thinking of my son reminded me I had a reason to live. Then it hit me, I felt like nothing, as if all my wind had been sucked out and all that was left was a worthless shell.

“I'm leaving,” Seven spat. “If you wanna stay here and take this crap, then do you, but me, I'm outta here!”

I stood there for a moment before walking backward to the car and getting in. I knew I looked crazy; I felt out of my mind. As the three of us got in the car and slammed the doors, I tried my best to believe what I was about to say. “I am so done with his ass!” I sniffed as tears covered my cheeks like glaze. “And I know he gon' come back beggin' me…like he always does. But I promise you, he gon' have to work real hard to get back with me. 'Cause I'm not beat for this no more!”

“You sound,” Seven said, shaking her head as we drove off, “so damn dumb.”