A Husband for the Holidays (Made For Matrimony 1) (5 page)

“See you, Darcy.”

She managed a smile. “Bye.”

He walked away, pushing his cart with his couple of grocery bags, and she could still see the box of cereal. It was bittersweet to know some things never changed.

She paid for her own purchase and walked out.

“Darce.”

She jumped at his voice. “Mack. What are you doing?”

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you.” He nodded to the Town Line Diner across the street. “Want to grab coffee? I’d like to make up for the other day.”

Oh, yes, more than anything
. Which was why, when she opened her mouth, she fully intended to say no. “Sure.”

Blame it on the darn cereal. He looked so relieved, she couldn’t berate herself for her weakness. “Great. Let me just put these in the truck. I’ll meet you over there.”

“Okay.” Darcy walked to her car, the butterflies in her midsection going full flutter. What had she done? This wasn’t a good idea.

It was just coffee. Maybe a chance to smooth things over.

She sat in her car and waited until he got in his truck, then followed him to the diner. This was why Uncle Joe’s suggestion she buy the tree farm was ridiculous. She couldn’t imagine running into Mack all over the place. She’d never be able to breathe fully here.

Coward.

Well, yes. Yes, she was. She parked next to him, grabbed her purse and took a deep breath.

She got out of the car and walked in next to him, unable to suppress the little shiver of awareness when his arm brushed hers. Even through the thickness of their coats, she swore she could feel his heat. Neither of them spoke.

Unsettled, she followed him wordlessly to a booth in the corner. She remembered coming here as a teenager with her friends. It smelled the same, of coffee and bacon and burgers. She slipped her jacket off and tried not to look at him.

Which, as it turned out, was easier said than done.

The waitress, perky and young, came over. “Hi, Dr. Lawless. What can I get you?” Darcy swore the young woman batted her eyes at him.

“Hi, Michelle. I’ll just have coffee. Darce?” He shifted his smile from the waitress to her. She resisted the urge to bat her eyes, as well.

The waitress shifted her attention to Darcy and took her in. If she hadn’t been already on the edge, she’d have found it amusing to be viewed this way by a girl who couldn’t be more than twenty to Mack’s thirty-two. Clearly she didn’t know the story of Darcy and Mack. If she did, Darcy was willing to bet she’d find her coffee in her lap. “Same. Thanks.”

Michelle pocketed her pad and headed off, a definite swing to her hips. Darcy looked back at Mack, whose gaze was on her, not the girl, and raised an eyebrow. “Still charming the ladies?”

“All but one, it seems,” he said, and his tone was serious.

She dropped her gaze and toyed with her silverware. He didn’t waste time getting to the point. “Why do you think charming her would work?” She meant to keep her tone light and failed.

“I don’t. But nothing else does.” The frankness of his words caught her. She sat back and regarded him with slightly narrowed eyes.

“What do you want, Mack?” It seemed best to just ask. Maybe they could just clear the air and move on.

He met her gaze as the waitress returned with the coffeepot. Darcy said nothing as she filled both cups, then reached for two creams when she left. “Nice to know some things don’t change.”

She emptied both in her cup. “Like what?”

“You’ve always taken your coffee the same way.”

The reference to the past, which lately hovered too close to the surface, brought her up short. “I’ve changed a lot, Mack.”

“I know.”

“Do you?” She sipped the hot liquid, welcomed the burn. “I’ve been gone a long time.”

“I know that, too.” Now his gaze was steady on hers. “We’ve got a lot to talk about.”

She shook her head. “No, not really. Nothing will change what happened and how it was handled. I will say I’m sorry.” Damn it, now there were tears burning in her eyes. “I’m so sorry for how it all went down. But it’s not all my fault.”

He leaned forward. “You left, Darce. Just left.”

“No, Mack. You let me go.”

Chapter Five

H
e stared at her. “It was what you wanted.”

No, it hadn’t been. What she’d wanted was for him to want her—to want their marriage—enough to fight for her. Make her stay. Want her for more than just her role as mother of their child.

He hadn’t. He’d just granted the divorce, no questions asked.

He’d never actually asked her why she’d left.

She pushed her cup aside. “It doesn’t matter now, does it?”

Mack examined her, this woman who’d once been his wife. He’d so wanted to do right by her, but when it had come down to it, he’d failed her. Failed their baby. It wasn’t any less bitter a revelation now than it had been then. He thought of when she’d bolted at the sight of the happy young couple. Clearly, it all mattered to her, too, even if he couldn’t get her to admit it.

“It does matter.” When she stared at him he cleared his throat. “It matters to me.”

He saw regret and pain in her brown eyes. She dropped her gaze. “It was what I wanted.”

Even as her words pierced him, he wondered if they were true. But this wasn’t the place to push it. He reached over and took her hand, feeling its coldness in his own, but it did nothing to diminish the heat he felt when he touched her. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry, too.” For all of it, even the way he’d sprung his plans for the farm on her.

She looked at their linked hands, then gave a nod. “Well, then. Friends?”

He squeezed her fingers before releasing her. “Friends.” He didn’t think this was settled, not by a long shot. But he’d take these first steps for what they were—a start. At least she wasn’t running away in tears.

“So. Tell me about your practice,” she invited, and he ran with the topic change, grateful for the chance to just be with her.

Nearly an hour later, he looked at his watch. Time to go back to the clinic. “I’ve got to go,” he said, truly regretful. “I’ve got a patient to check on.”

She looked at her phone, and seemed surprised at the time. “Wow. I didn’t realize it was this late. Okay.”

They paid the bill and walked out into the cold night. A light snow had moved in and it sparkled in the parking lot lights. Not wanting the evening to end, he turned to her. “Come with me?”

She blinked up at him, snow caught on her lashes. “Excuse me?”

“Do you want to see the clinic?”

He held his breath, not wanting to admit how important this was to him, as she clearly wrestled with the question. “Okay.”

Relief flooded him, along with something else he couldn’t name. “It’s not far. Follow me.”

She got in her SUV and followed him to the clinic. He had managed to get the Christmas lights up as well as the garland, and they were lit now—on a timer to go off at eleven, along with all the other businesses along Main Street. Darcy parked across the street and stood there, looking.

He came up next to her, closer than he knew he should. “What do you see?”

She gestured at the street. “It’s so cheery. Especially in the snow. When I think of Christmas, this is the scene I picture. I’ve missed it.”

He nearly pointed out she could have come back at any time—in fact, she’d never had to leave—but he didn’t want to ruin their new truce. “It is charming.” He swept his hand out. “Shall we?”

She gave a little giggle and stepped off the curb. God, how he’d missed her laugh. There hadn’t been much laughter after they got married. Then the accident had happened only six months in.

Pushing that thought away, he unlocked the door and reset the alarm. She stepped in behind him, noting the neatness of the waiting room. A Christmas tree stood in one corner, tags hanging off it. “What’s this?”

“A wish tree. For the humane society. Things like cat litter, dog food, towels and blankets, that kind of thing. People take a tag, drop off the items and one of us runs it out there.”

Oh, yes, this was the man she’d so loved. “What a great idea.” When he went in front of her, she took a tag off the tree. “Dry cat food,” it read. She slipped it in her purse.

The waiting area had a hard floor, comfy chairs, a few magazines on a table. A bulletin board held pictures of lots of animals and their owners. Another framed picture said “Get to know Dr. Lawless” and had pictures of him and his pets. “This is sweet.”

He glanced up from the chart he was looking over. “Oh. Well, people like to see my pets.”

“How many?” she asked as she followed him back through a door.

“Two dogs, two cats,” he said. “Sometimes more if I’m fostering somebody. Minnie is in here.”

She heard the muffled barking behind another door and raised an eyebrow.

“Those are the boarders, or those that are recovering from less intense surgeries. In here I keep those who need a more relaxed environment. Trauma patients or riskier surgeries.”

“And who’s Minnie?” She followed him into the room, where a little beagle lay on a doggie bed. She thumped her tail when they walked up.

“Minnie was hit by a car. The guy who hit her brought her in. She was— It was touch-and-go. She needs more pain meds.”

Darcy stared at the liquid brown eyes, so full of pain yet joy to see them. “Oh, what a sweet girl. Who’s her owner?”

“We don’t know yet. No collar, no tags, no microchip.” He opened the cage door and murmured in a low voice to the dog while Darcy stood back, out of the way, watching. There was a little yelp as he gave her a shot. Then he rubbed her head as she dozed off. “Here. You can pet her while she falls asleep.”

Darcy stepped forward and rubbed the dog’s head. Minnie tried to give her a little lick. “Oh, you poor sweet girl. You don’t know who she belongs to?”

“No.” His tone was grim.

A shudder ran through Darcy. “Abandoned?”

His face was grim. “Happens more than you’d care to know. Foreclosure, need to move, can’t take care of the pets. Sometimes they just leave them in the house and walk away. Sometimes they just drop them off somewhere thinking, hey, it’s an animal, it can fend for itself. They can’t.” Anger laced his voice. “I understand not being able to feed them. But I wish—I wish people would bring them to a shelter rather than just abandon them.”

She touched his wrist with her free hand, thought of the wish tree in the lobby. “That’s so sad. They’ve got you as an advocate, though. That counts as something.”

He moved up next to her, and in the dim light she saw the weight of this on him. The grimness on his face was reflected in his tone. “It’s not enough. It will never be enough. However.” He reached in, his arm brushing hers, his hand touching hers as he rubbed the now sleeping Minnie’s head. “We do what we can.”

She looked up at him as he looked back down at her. The heat from the proximity of their bodies drowned out everything else. He was so close she could lay her head on his chest. If she angled her body slightly, she could fit against him, see if it was still as perfect as it had been all those years ago. His hand slid over hers on Minnie’s head, and the rough warmth of his palm sent sparks across her skin. He withdrew both their hands together, and his hot gaze dropped to her mouth.

Minnie whimpered in her sleep and Darcy stepped back, her breath shaky, as he shifted his attention to the dog. She cleared her throat. “Will she be okay?” Her words were a little breathy.

“I hope so. So far so good.” She heard the roughness of his voice and closed her eyes. This attraction wasn’t welcome, yet she couldn’t control her reaction to him any more than she could stop breathing.

He latched the cage and made a note in the chart. She stepped a little farther back. “Do you have to come back and check on her later?”

He shook his head. “Jennifer will check on her later tonight. There’s an apartment upstairs. She lives there and usually when we have a case like this takes the middle of the night shift.”

“Oh. Well. That’s handy,” she murmured, trying to ignore the completely irrational spurt of jealousy at the casual mention of the other woman. Stupid, and totally unwarranted.

“Yeah, it works well.” He tipped his head toward the door. “I’ve done what I need to here. You ready?”

She followed him back out, noting the quiet with which he shut the door behind him. She nodded toward the other door. “Do they need to be taken out?”

“No, that’s all been taken care of for the evening,” he said, and set Minnie’s chart on the front desk.

“You’ve done well, Mack.” The observation slipped out and he turned to her with surprise. “You fit here.”

He moved toward her, his gaze sharp. “As would you, Darcy.”

She shook her head. “No, I’m good in Chicago. I love it there.”

“Do you?” He moved closer still and she edged back, but the hallway wall stopped her. “Do you really?”

He wasn’t holding her in place, but Darcy couldn’t seem to move. It was as if her cells had missed him so much she needed to soak up his nearness, his heat, as if he were the sun. She swallowed. “Yes,” she whispered.

He moved a little closer and braced one arm on the wall, his gaze never leaving hers, the heat and want there a mirror of her own. “Darcy,” he murmured, then lowered his head to settle his mouth on hers.

Her eyes drifted closed and she savored the sweetness of the kiss, which quickly turned to fire as he nipped at her lip. She opened for him and the kiss went from sweet to spicy in a heartbeat.

She slid her arms around his neck and let her fingers play in the longer hair there. He plunged his fingers in her hair and deepened the kiss even more. Fire licked through her, and brought with it the roaring desire she’d always had with Mack.

All of a sudden he wrenched back and left her, nearly panting, against the wall. “God, Darcy, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean— I overstepped.”

Her face burned. Sorry. Of course he was. “Are you saying we need to just forget it happened?”

He didn’t seem to sense the trap. “Yeah, I think that’d be best.”

He couldn’t have hurt her more if he’d physically struck her. She swallowed hard and lifted her chin. “Well. Consider it forgotten.” She darted around him and he let her go.

He let out a curse as the door shut behind her. He’d made a royal mess of it. Not the first time. They’d been making strides toward a fragile peace and then he went and gave in to the need to push her, to touch her, to kiss her. To get her to admit she’d made a mistake. Now she’d be back to avoiding him.

Maybe that was for the best. Maybe they couldn’t manage “friends” after all. Especially with kisses like that hanging between them.

He walked back to his office and looked out the window to confirm her car was gone. He didn’t want to admit he was more than disappointed she’d left. He hadn’t been able to give her a reason to stay when it mattered most, so why did he think it’d be different now?

He was a fool. A fool for Darcy Kramer. It seemed he’d learned nothing over the past several years.

She’d leave—again—and that’d be the end.

This time for good.

* * *

Mack had kissed her. Really kissed her.

And she’d melted all over.

The memory of it swirled through her system, like the snowflakes that danced in her headlights. A little shiver ran through her. No one had ever kissed like Mack did, made her feel like Mack did. Not that she had much experience outside of Mack. She’d shut that part of her down.

Of course, he’d also suggested it had been a mistake. So there was that. She tried to ignore the spike of disappointment and remind herself it was for the best.

She snapped out of her reverie when she pulled into the driveway and saw an ambulance parked there. In a heartbeat the panic set in. She threw the car in Park with a gasp and ran up to the door, where she saw her uncle strapped to the gurney and her aunt’s ashen face.

“Uncle Joe! Aunt Marla, what happened?” She stood to the side so the paramedics could load her uncle in the ambulance.

“His heart.” Marla turned stricken eyes on Darcy. “He’s having pain, shortness of breath, all of it.”

Darcy inhaled deeply and took her aunt’s arm. “I’ll drive you up to the hospital,” she said as the nearby paramedic nodded as they climbed into the vehicle. “Let’s go.”

They hurried back to her still warm car and Darcy bounced down the driveway behind the ambulance. Marla sat beside her and even in the dark, Darcy could feel the tension and fear rolling off her aunt.

* * *

Hours passed, and Marla looked up at Darcy. “You’d better call Mack. Let him know.”

Darcy inhaled sharply. While she knew her aunt was right, the thought made her own heart beat irregularly. She kept her voice calm. “I don’t have his number. If you can put it in my phone, I’ll do that now.”

Marla nodded, apparently not reading anything on her face, so Darcy pulled her phone out. It was late. Would he even answer? She’d left in such a hurry.

The phone rang twice. Then Mack’s voice, low and calm. “Hello?”

Darcy took a deep breath. “It’s me. Darcy,” she added lamely, momentarily tangled up in the propriety of how to identify herself to the man she’d been married to yet hadn’t spoken to for seven years until the past week or so.

“Darcy?” The question he didn’t ask was clear in his tone. “Is everything okay?”

“Um, not really. Uncle Joe’s in the hospital. Aunt Marla asked me to call you and let you know.” She folded her free arm across her middle and stared out at the parking lot, at the snow sifting down on the cars parked there. The coldness of the scene reflected how she felt inside.

“What happened?” He sounded much more alert now.

Darcy explained what she knew. “So it’s a waiting game now. I’m with Aunt Marla and some of her friends. They’re knitting.”

A little chuckle came over the line. “I’m sure they are. I’ll be there in fifteen.”

Darcy jumped and looked up to see Marla’s gaze on her. “Um. That’s not necessary. It’s so late—”

“See you then.”

The phone went dead in her hand and she pulled it away from her ear to stare at it, frustrated. There was no reason for him to be here. They weren’t married. Joe was going to be fine.

She walked back over to her aunt, who had needles flying in her hands. She looked up, but the needles never slowed. “Did you talk to him, then?”