A Long Distance Love Affair (11 page)

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Authors: Mary-Ellen McLean

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I have adored you since I first laid eyes on you.  How does it feel to be the object of such unbridled desire??? Oh I wish you were here to distil the passionate essence of me...

 

There are times I feel very guilty about this unswerving passionate assault on you and know I should rein myself in, but I just can’t help it...I just can’t help myself where you’re concerned.....so forgive me and I hope you can continue with your generous tolerance of me and of these outbursts.

 

I know I shouldn’t say this, but sometimes I feel that my soul is extending out to you, to the very – edge - of my life....

 

Chariette

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Chariot

 

I went to bed last night wanting you very much, wishing I could satisfy my deep yearnings to touch you (and for you to touch me).  What a lure you are…you make me awash with very voluptuous feelings.  How I’m wishing that my cheeks could

 

“glow yet smoother from your amorous clutch!”

 

(both sets of cheeks....)

 

I’m so mad about you - heaven help me...

 

Chariette

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Chariot

 

So wonderful to hear from you last night. Oh that voice…

 

It was lovely to hear you speaking of your daughter in such caring terms and with such pride. Father daughter relationships can be very special.  Mine was.  I adored my father and still feel very close to him despite losing him when I was 21. It was he who created my loving heart and disposition.

 

I have such a desire to kiss you on the neck just now I can’t tell you ….I am still utterly possessed with passion for you.  I am hoping some angel will come down and release me from this madness…but it hasn’t happened yet.  And I do struggle with the wrongness of it, but can’t overcome it.  I have a (naïve) belief that things happen for a reason, but have no idea at this stage what on earth the reason is.  All I do know is that I’m finding you very pleasurable (pleasurable beyond description…) even though it’s wicked and I’m doomed to hell!  I will go to my grave with the happiness of the pleasure of you entering my life firmly embedded in the secrets of my soul.

 

But just now all I can think about is the pleasure of you entering me….my body is just dying for you…

 

Chariette

 

 

 

Dear Chariot

 

Oh how full of hope and expectation I am at your coming this week. I can’t get the thought of you out of my head.  Every minute is an hour, every hour a day and every day a month till you come. ...’I must attend time’s leisure with my moan...’

 

And it’s a significant week this week with the transit of Venus happening.  It will make me even more alive to you and receptive and willing and full of feeling. And there’s a full moon as well so our encounter should be something else indeed...all I need is for you to show up!

 

I still can’t believe this is happening.

 

Chariette

 

 

 

 

 

Sweet Chariot

 

I have been thinking about you a lot (what else is new...), thinking about you feeling dissatisfied at work and not knowing where you’re heading just now.  I wish I could help you with this.  I have been in much darker places where I thought my very soul was starving to death and that no one could possibly understand so I kept it to myself for a very long time.  It wasn’t until by chance one day that a close friend of mine happened upon me when I was in a very distressed state and encouraged me to open up to her about what was going on in my life at that time. 

 

This opening up was for me the beginning of the reclamation of my life and had such a profound effect on me. It formed an incredible bond of friendship and trust and made me realise that friends can be such a source of pure, unadulterated, uncomplicated, untied, apolitical, simple love and support.  So, if I could help you, I would say to you not to carry it inside you, but to talk about what you’re thinking and feeling to friends and family and to keep on talking until you begin to understand what it is you’re experiencing and why you are experiencing it.  I think it was Socrates who said that the unexamined life is not worth living. And even though it is uncomfortable to look inside and examine what’s going on and why it’s going on you will eventually come to a clearer understanding of what your soul is after and how to reach that point, or at least how to set out after it.  The other thing I would say to you as a friend is to go all out to Enjoy Life and Seek Happiness.  I have made this my quest and I can tell you it’s a good one.

 

I have found that I Enjoy You very much, particularly when we are in close proximity....I particularly enjoy particular parts of you and very much enjoy being enjoyed by you!!  I am an ecstatic wanderer in the garden of your body and you bring my whole being to throbbing life. 

 

You have been responsible for my sexual reclamation and it’s so wonderful and I’m so grateful to you and it’s given me such great happiness.

 

“The pleasure of possessing

 

surpasses all expressing...”

 

You have also provided great sustenance for my soul

 

 Chariette

 

 

 

You glorious thing you

 

What can I say?  That was the most sexually wonderful thrilling night of my life.  I felt so uninhibited and relaxed with you. And you are such a generous lover. Oh just everything, everything was divine. You thrill me so, and fill me so, I am replete with you.   And I enjoyed your company and had fun too. Your sexual prowess is truly staggering to me.

 

I feel so honoured at your willingness to be intimate with me like this. It is something I could very easily become addicted to (says the alcoholic of a brandy). It gives me such pleasure to stroke you and kiss you and lie in your arms and hear you breathing and to touch your beautiful hands and to fondle your lovely bits. Oh and your sexual kisses were something else! I could just eat you again now.  My body is tingling with desire at the thought of this…

 

I will remember this night when the transit of Venus comes again in 8 years…

 

Thank you so much.

 

I am completely swept away by you. 

 

Chariette

 

PS I am finding it difficult to walk today…there are muscles in my thighs that I never knew existed.

 

 

 

Dear Heart

 

I am still awash with you!  I woke this morning about 8.00 am then fell back asleep and have only just arisen at 3.00 in the afternoon. This is unbelievable for me.  And I woke up feeling so happy I can’t tell you.  I am feeling extremely intense at the moment and I have to try to keep a grip on what I say to you but it’s very difficult given the state I’m in.

 

I still can’t walk!!  And I have two small bruises on the inside of my right thigh that look just like your fingertips...I hope it’s an age before they fade so I can be reminded of you.

 

I so loved being with you.  Not just the sex.  The sex was truly fantastic and I loved your lustiness and you brought out all the lust in me. (Which is a considerable well I can tell you...) But I loved just being with you and touching you. I hope you could feel the tenderness of my feelings for you in my touch.  It was just flowing out of me.  I wish I could die just now with this beautiful memory being my last one.

 

Oh I could really open up to you right now.  It’s so hard for me keeping a restraint on this...My heart is just pounding with feeling and I’m so overcome with you. Oh God... I adore you so much.  I’m going to stop now before I lose control...but I have so much I want to say to you....

 

Chariette

 

 

 

 

 

Dear Chariot

 

I very much enjoyed our conversation last night.  I feel more and more relaxed with you the more I have to do with you and this is such a lovely feeling for me and testimony to your lovely nature and ability to create this in me.

 

I have to try to get you out of my head so I’m writing to you now.  Have completely given up trying to get you out of my body...nothing works so you’re there tormenting me all the time.

 

Since the pressure has eased off me a bit a work I feel you flooding in to every vacant space of me.  I desperately need to get stuck into some new project now that will occupy me and momentarily take my mind off you, because otherwise the all consuming longing for you that I experience is too much to bear... Oh.... I wish you could:

 

“Come now, and let me dream it truth.

 

And part my hair, and kiss my brow,

 

And say – My dear! Why sufferest thou?”

 

I hope that you are finding some clarity in your thinking about where you’re heading.  I hope you are pursuing your hopes and dreams with all vigour just now.  I’ve noticed a tinge of regret in your voice about some things you’ve spoken to me about....wishing that you could have spent time in Saudi Arabia, and have stayed longer in America.  Regret is something that can sap you needlessly (I fight against this though I have much to regret in my life...I don’t know how on earth I let myself get into (and stay in) the situation I was in for so long and the awful sense of the wastedness of my life is very powerful in me sometimes).  So if you have unfulfilled needs and ambitions just now I would give you all encouragement to set out on a path to seek their fulfilment. 

 

I hope you have a very wonderful weekend....... I just think the world of you...

 

Chariette

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Heart's Delight

 

Thankyou for your thoughtful phone call yesterday - it nourished me for the whole day.

 

You are also my ear's delight.  I am very drawn to the tones of your voice (very drawn to everything about you, but you know that already).  I like the masculine depth of it; I like the modulation of it and I like the way you pronounce your ''i's.  It all makes very pleasurable connections to the appropriate receptors in my brain.  (I love the way you say 'fuck' too, and that makes exciting connections with other parts of me.)  I just find you one totally delightful package.  You are obviously the right spark plug for me.  I just have to fleetingly think of any aspect of you and I become awash with receptiveness for you and with happy feelings.

 

I am enjoying going to the gym and have had a program worked out for me to increase cardiovascular something or other... Mind you I can think of much more pleasant ways of increasing my heart rate and exercising certain muscles and these largely revolve around you.  I am also interacting with a few torture machines to tone certain parts of me, but I don't think I'll live long enough to accomplish this feat.

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