All About Me (28 page)

I spread the lotion over her shoulders as a small gasp of pleasure escapes her. My cock goes hard in an instant, which restricts my movements and puts me in a really awkward position. Now I
’
m totally fucked because I can
’
t get up. I need to feel her. There is only one way to get out of this situation, so before she lets me do anything, I get up and run towards the sea, diving in as soon as I can. The water is cold and refreshing. India turns me on and there is nothing I can do about it. But I don
’
t want to look like a complete prick in front of her.

India keeps staring at me, confused and pissed off at the same time. I dive in, wiping any sexual memories out of mind. I swim, thinking yet again about flying pigs. That does the job, so when I sit next to her again, my Johnson is flat. She doesn
’
t say anything to me and goes for a swim later on. I sunbathe for a bit and then go to the shop and buy ice cream.

“
Here, I got you some ice cream. Toffee, your favourite.
”
 

“
You shouldn
’
t have,
”
she mutters back.

She reapplies her sun tan lotion, this time around without my help, and an hour later we both decide that it
’
s time to call it a day. We don
’
t talk much on the way to the hotel. My whole strategy is slightly off at the moment. I ditched sex with random birds and now I
’
m frustrated. Whatever happens, I have to keep going and focus on the only woman that is right for me.

It
’
s just before five in the afternoon when we get back. The heat is a little less overwhelming. I don
’
t want her to feel forced to be with me, but I want to take her to La Rocca and then try to apologise once again. I give her some alone time and go to the bar to grab a drink. All these new emotions are confusing. Our mutual attraction is making it worse. She is resisting, pushing me away.

Surprisingly, she joins me half an hour later. She caught the sun and her freckles are much more evident.

“
Hey, ready to climb the mountain and experience the stunning view?
”
I ask.

“
Yeah, let
’
s do it,
”
she agrees.

I look at her, surprised, but don
’
t say anything in case she changes her mind. Maybe I
’
m lucky today! She is slowly understanding she can
’
t fight with me and forgetting about my nasty shit.

Chapter Twenty-seven

Pushing for it.

Present

Climbing La Rocca is fucking hard work. I normally don
’
t complain, but this heat takes all my strength out of me. Sweat is surging down my face, but we keep walking, climbing farther and higher. India is right behind me. So far I haven
’
t heard a single complaint from her and I
’
m impressed. We are both fit enough. Not wanting to sound like a wimp, I don
’
t say anything, just carry on. A few tourists walking back greet us on the way. Now I get why most of the people from the group turned down my offer to accompany us. They prefer to stay on the terrace lying in the sun, rather than climbing this tough mountain. There are some old fortifications on the way. We stop, trying to catch our breath, pretending that we can carry on just fine.

Soon the trail splits right and left. To me, both paths look difficult.

“
Which way now?
”
she asks, her face flushed as she leans forward, breathing hard. I look around the sloppy path, scratching my head in confusion. Either way we will get to the top, so I
don
’
t think it
’
s a hard decision.

“
Always right.
”
 

She nods and we carry on. The mountain is steep and my legs are aching. India is awfully quiet and I
’
m wondering if she is cursing me off in her head because I dragged her here. The road is filled with rocks and every single step is getting harder and higher.

Twenty minutes later, we reach the top. We are both knackered, sweaty, and ready to get back down. The view from the medieval fortification
’
s wall is staggering. From there we can see the whole of Cefalu, the beach, the wide-open ocean and the marina on the other side. It
’
s still hot and the sun is slowly going down, but there aren
’
t many people we
’
ve met along the way. I spot another couple on the other side. India asks me to take a few pictures of her. She looks tired, but satisfied. I grab the camera and snap a few good pictures, capturing that mesmerising view.
 

Then I approach her, trying to stay calm, but my heart is pounding. I
’
ve been planning this since Dora mentioned Sicily. It is a romantic place where no one can interrupt us, and this moment seems perfect.

“
India, please let me apologise to you one more time,
”
I say, moving closer than I should. She looks at me as if distancing herself, like she is not sure what I
’
m going to do next and afraid of any intimate contact. I touch her cheek and move her hair aside, staring deep into her eyes.
“
Please believe that I
’
m sorry. I was pissed off and angry. I realised too late how much I hurt you.
”

I move closer again and within moments we are only a few inches apart. She looks back, softening her tense expression. I want to kiss her so badly and feel her body, knowing that she is only mine.

“
Oliver, this is not that simple. I wanted to tell you about the rape many times, but there was always something that held me back
.
”

I bring her to my chest, remembering how angry I was back then and that I didn
’
t even listen because I
’
ve been such an arsehole. I close my eyes, running my hand over her back. Silence is the witness to our intimacy, as my heart beats rapidly. She relaxes afterwards and I inhale her perfume, pushing the bad memories away. It
’
s just us and right at this moment the past is no longer relevant. Desire creeps over my skin and my dick strains in my trousers, poking her thigh. India lifts her head, searching for my eyes.

“
You need to give me time, Oliver. I feel like I
’
ll never be rid of the past,
”
she says, biting her lips.

“
I know, so don
’
t think about this too much, just take as much time as you want.
”

She nods and wraps her hands around my waist, pressing her head to my heart. I
’
m afraid to let go of her. It
’
s going to be all right between us from now on. It took me a long time to come to terms with my mother and forgive her. It
’
s the same for India. She is scared that I
’
m going to take advantage of her again. I want to think that a heavy guilt has vanished, but at least India is willing to consider forgiving me. Evans is still her boyfriend and I didn
’
t make this any easier for them.

We leave La Rocca a few minutes later in silence. The path down is equally exhausting as the path up. We don
’
t get much rest by the time we reach our hotel. Within half an hour we have to pack and head to Palermo, which is our next amazing stop.

Later on, just before we are loading the bus, I call the restaurant that I checked out yesterday online and luckily, I manage to book a table for us. The manager didn
’
t speak much English, but somehow he understood what I wanted. India talks to me a bit more than she did on the plane during this trip. There is an obvious tension between us, but it
’
s a slow progress.

The trip to Palermo takes around an hour, driving through the beautiful Sicilian coastline. Dora has sent me a million messages demanding to know how things are going with India, not taking my bullshit about a broken phone. She probably pushed Jacob to keep phoning me until I answer. They have to wait until we both come back because I
’
m fed up with games. I don
’
t want India to think that something is wrong. We have another four days left and I
’
m determined to regain her trust in me.

The capital of Sicily is busy and the drivers are even crazier than in the countryside. I wonder how we got to our hotel in one piece. Michael distributes the maps for tomorrow as we stop a few miles outside the city centre at the hotel. A loud Italian man runs it with his wife. I
’
ve done research about this famous Italian city that teems with life and a unique atmosphere. It
’
s a widely populated place, full of rich history, art, music and of course, food. Once the bus driver finally lets us out, we check in quickly, then head to our room. The dinner is set for an hour later, but I let Michael know that we will be going out. India doesn
’
t bring up the subject of sharing a room with me again.

“
Just don
’
t get lost and stay away from trouble,
”
Michael warns me, not too keen to let me out on my own. Like in any foreign city, I have to know the limits, avoid dangerous areas and just keep away from dodgy individuals.

“
I
’
m taking you out for dinner, and before you say anything, just get dressed. I
’
ll be waiting outside,
”
I tell India once we get to our room. She wants to protest and ask questions, but I just tell her to get ready and she vanishes into the bathroom. It
’
s a special dinner and I want to get everything out on the table. No more lies and secrets.

I hang a bit outside the hotel. looking at the people that pass by on the street. It
’
s getting dark and I wish that everything were much simpler than it is now. I
’
m nervous and that
’
s never happened before on any other date, if I can even call this a date. India shows up later, wearing a short black dress that exposes her magnificent legs. She smiles when she sees me, for the first time since the incident in the restaurant months ago. She seems genuinely happy to be with me.

“
I don
’
t get it. Why do you want to go out?
”
she asks.
“
The girls said that the food looks stunning in the hotel restaurant.
”

“
It doesn
’
t matter. I want to treat you and I think we both know that I owe you this.
”

She doesn
’
t agree with me and starts telling me that I don
’
t have to prove anything to her. We end up arguing. I take her hand and I know that she doesn
’
t fucking like it. Right now, I
’
m fed up with this conversation, and the table is waiting.

She finally quiets down as we get in a taxi. She knows that she won
’
t win with me, and tonight I want to make this evening very special. Unfortunately, the taxi driver doesn
’
t speak any English, but he knows straight away where to go when I show him the address. This restaurant is pretty famous in Palermo and it has great ratings, so I
’
m confident that food is going to be delicious.

The drive isn
’
t long, and after fifteen minutes of a journey through hell and twenty euros shorter, we are at the main square. The old, famous cathedral is impressive. I snap a few shots of India in the background. Downtown Palermo teems with life in the evening, brimming with a lot of young people from all over the world. We take a few more pictures, admiring the architecture. I switch on my navigator and within another fifteen minutes I locate the restaurant.

“
Welcome, signorina and signore,
”
a tall Italian waiter with a moustache greets us as we walk inside. We get a table on the roof terrace that overlooks a few beautiful monuments. Another waiter lights a candle and for a brief moment, it
’
s only us. The menu looks excellent and I order a few cocktails for starters. This whole setup feels like it
’
s a dream. Only a couple of weeks ago we were both fighting, and now we are both eating a special meal in one of the most beautiful cities of Europe.

“
How do you feel now that your mother is back in your life?
”
she asks, nibbling her food as she turns the conversation to a serious subject.

“
It was tough and it still is. Christian was taking after my father, who wasn
’
t a good person. I should have seen it coming, India. I should have known that something wasn
’
t right,
”
I say, shaking my head in anger.
“
That bastard ruined both our lives because he hated that I could have been happy.
”