All He Desires: The Complete Series (9 page)

It's just the flogger, Kira.
But I hadn't felt anything.

Snap
.

The flogger hit against skin. I flinched away from the noise, but the pain I felt came from the clamps instead.

Jake reached around me and set his jaw on my shoulder. "Breathe for me, Kira."

I inhaled. He removed one of the clamps, and it took everything I had not to cry out. Holy hell, the damn things hurt more when he took them off than when he'd put them on.

"One more," Jake murmured, reaching for the other one.

Fuck.
I'd forgotten there were two of them. The second one came off, and my eyes started to water.

"Don't touch," I begged, hoping he wouldn't reach around and pinch both nipples between his fingertips. "Please, Master. Don't."

He kissed the side of my neck. "Too much?"

I sighed around my relief when he backed away. "Almost, Master."

"Why didn't you use a safe word?"

"Because, I...I didn't know it would hurt that much."

He didn't correct me when I forgot to address him properly. Blinking away the tears, I took a breath. Then another. All the while, Jake stood behind me, patiently waiting for...who-the-hell knew what. I was thankful, though. And in a few short moments, the pain started to subside.

"Doing okay?" Jake asked, probably having noticed my muscles relaxing as the pain started to fade.

"Yes, Master."

I flinched much like before when the flogger snapped behind me, only this time, I
felt
it. There, but not there all at once. The noise it made sounded a lot worse than it actually was. In fact, if I didn't know any better, I would've sworn Jake had kissed my shoulder. That's how gentle it felt.

The flogger came down again on my other shoulder, cracking against my skin. Biting just a little harder. Alternating between shoulders, Jake picked up the pace as well as the flogger's intensity. Six leather tails struck the middle of my back, away from the spine.

I couldn't decide what to focus on more, the terrifying noise or the rhythmic waltz the tails seemed to be doing across my back.

Left.

Right.

Left.

Right.

Hard. Harder.

Faster.

He never hit the same spot twice in a row, probably giving my skin a chance to cool before warming it up again. By now, my back was on fire, but so was my mind. My clit. My entire body was engulfed by the back and forth of the flogger.

Still lost in the rhythm, I swayed to one side. Jake had already stopped.

He placed a hand on my back, and before I could even register his touch, he pressed a finger to my clit. I whimpered. Squirmed.

My head fell back to rest against the cross, but I didn't open my eyes. I couldn't open them even if I tried. Still aware of the fire on my back, it couldn't compare to the icy sensation on my clit. Jake took his time, brushing my hair out of my face as his finger circled my clit.

I thrust forward, moaning when a single finger parted my pussy lips.

Jake smiled against my ear. "You're fucking soaked. If I'd known...Jesus, Kira...if I'd..." he trailed off, but in the next instant, he pressed his erect cock against my hip. "Feel that?"

I nodded and bit my lip.

"That's all you, baby. God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this to you."

Struggling past my haze, I said, "What kept you, Master?"

"Professionalism. I couldn’t just kidnap you and bring you here. It would've given you the wrong idea." He groaned. Thrust against me. "But I do like seeing you tied up. And it seems to me, you like it as well."

He trailed a finger between my pussy lips, nipping behind my ear as I tried to keep myself together.
It's a good thing you have those cuffs on.
There was no way I could stand on my own. Not with his finger on my clit. My pussy.

"Fuck," I exhaled when he inserted a finger.

"Mm, this is a good look on you," Jake murmured, adding a second finger to the first before hooking them against my G-spot. "The way you are now, I could do whatever I want, and there isn't a damn thing you could do about it." He pressed his palm against my clit as he beckoned my G-spot with his fingers. "Does that scare you?"

"No, Master."

"No? And why is that?"

I swallowed. Shivered. Tried to breathe. "Because I..."

"Yes?"

"I want...I want you to—" My breath caught when he thrust against me again, biting at my neck when he did.

"You want what?"

You know, you're making it very hard for me to answer that.
Hell, he was making it almost impossible for me to think. Each time I tried to say something, he'd—

"Oh, God," I moaned as my pussy clamped down around his fingers.

"You're close, aren't you? But here's the thing," Jake's fingers moved a little faster. Drove me a little higher. "You aren't allowed to come until I tell you to."

Oh, God.
I bit the inside of my cheek. Held on to my restraints. Anything to ignore what he was doing with his hands. His teeth.

"Please, Master," I almost sobbed. "Please, let me...I want..."
Come on, Kira. Two words.
"Fuck me, Master. Please..."

Jake withdrew his fingers and pulled back on my hair. "I don't normally follow orders, but I'll let it slide this once. We fuck when I say we do, is that understood?"

"Yes, Master."

"Good."

He stepped away, returning moments later. I could barely keep still when I heard the foil of the condom wrapper tear. Even more so when he put it on.

Positioning himself between myself and the cross, there was no stopping. No slow entry. In one swift movement, he thrust deep inside, groaning as he did.
Sweet, sweet bliss.
I tugged against the cuffs, wanting nothing more than to play with my clit. I moaned. Thrust back against him the best I could. Rocked my hips to pull him in even deeper.

Strong arms hugged my waist as he used quick, hard strokes, hitting against my G-spot. Every. Single. Time.

My vision darkened. Turned white. Darkened again. I wanted to let go. I needed to.
But you mustn't.
He hadn't given me permission. And if it was important to him, then it was important to me.

"Shit, baby," Jake growled, moving a hand toward my pussy to play with my clit. "So wet. So tight. Wonderful."

His praise, his words of passion were almost too much.
They always are.
But the way he thrust into me, there was no stopping it. I was too close. Too far gone.

"Master," I cried out, clawing at the chains connecting the cuffs to the cross. "Please, Master."

He thrust again. Twice, releasing a low growl when he did. "Go, Kira. Let go."

Not knowing if he was referring to my hold on the cuffs or my orgasm, I let go of everything, and lost it.

W
hen I finally returned to some semblance of reality, I was lying on my stomach on the bed. The cuffs that had been around my wrists were no longer there, and as I became even more grounded, I started to notice something cool on my back.

"Lie still," Jake ordered, rubbing my shoulders. "I'm almost done."

Almost done what?
I wanted to ask, but thought better of it. He worked out a knot in my right shoulder, and I just about melted into the sheets. I couldn't remember the last time I'd had a massage, and Jake had just the right amount of force to be comforting and maybe a little painful. That is, until he worked out the kink and moved on to the next one.

"Mm, you're a masseur as well?" I asked, trying my best not to drool on the bed.

"Not licensed, no," Jake said, moving his attention a little farther down my back. He leaned over, to put some more oil in his palm I realized, before adding it to what was already on my shoulders.

I wrinkled my nose at the odd fragrance. "What oils are you using?"

"Not oils actually. It's a salve. A precaution mostly." His hands lifted away from me. "And you stopped calling me Master."

Crap, I had, hadn't I?
"I'm sorry, Master."

He laughed. "It's okay. The scene is over. Right now we'll just limit your role as a sub to the bedroom or when we come into the dungeon. You can speak freely now. How do you feel?" He gestured for me to sit up, wrapping a robe around me when I did.

"Surprisingly good, actually." I rolled my shoulders back, wincing at the slight kinks I felt there. "Well, almost."

"And that's a surprise because..." He raised an eyebrow to finish the question.

"The flogger. I thought—"

"It can cause damage, if used by the wrong Dom. Like I said before, I'm not in this to leave marks, especially permanent ones. I'll use stronger stokes once I feel you're ready, but your back isn't tough enough yet."

I thought back on when I climaxed and still couldn't figure out how I got to the bed. "How long was I out of it?"

"Out of it?"

"I blacked out, didn't I?"

He furrowed his brow. "Not that I know of. Why do you ask?"

"I...I don't remember walking from the cross to the bed."

"That's because you didn't. I carried you. You were...wobbling."

"What I mean is, I
don't
remember it. Any of it."

He smiled. "Orgasm was that good, huh?"

I sighed and sank into his arms. "Does that mean I reached subspace?"

"Not unless closing your eyes counts." He kissed my forehead. "Don't look so disappointed. Regardless of what you've read, subspace can take weeks, months or even years to achieve. Hell, I know of some subs who don't reach it at all."

"Then why do this?" I gestured to the bed and the robe I was now wearing over the salve he'd just put on.

"Aftercare is something I do for my subs. Every time. Even if she feels she doesn't need it. This is how I bond, and believe it or not, Doms need aftercare as well. We need to know we treated our subs right. That she's comfortable with us and holds no resentment toward us."

"Why would I resent you?"

"Sometimes, after a session, a sub might experience what we call subdrop. It's like depression, but worse. Everything feels pointless, and it's a very helpless, lonely feeling. Some subs have been known to run out on their Dom, blaming the negative feelings on their play. Some subs have even reported their Doms to the cops for abuse."

"But..." I frowned. "She consented, didn't she?"

"In this scenario, yes, she did. But that's not how the cops will see it, especially if our play leaves marks."

I drew back the robe and craned my neck to look at the back of my shoulder. "Is that why I'm only a little pink?"

"No. You're only a little pink because this was your first time. I didn't want to overwhelm you. My goal with you isn't to thrust you into subspace until you know and understand what it is."

"It's just like blacking out, isn't it?"

He shook his head and his eyes grew distant. "There's no real way to describe it. Some subs say you get a tingling sensation around your mind and go blank. Others claim it's more of a sensation you feel all over your body. Peaceful. From what I understand, you don't think when you're in subspace, you only feel. Pleasure mostly. From my point of view, I know when a sub's reached subspace by looking at her eyes."

"How do you mean?"

"Think of when someone daydreams. That glazed look they get? Subs get a very similar look." He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. "Their words might also become slurred and their responses delayed. It's very important for me as a Dom to see these signs so I can keep an eye on you. I never keep a sub in subspace for an extended period of time. She may enjoy it and even want to stay, but that means taking more time to bring her back down again."

"Is every sub like that?"

"No, which is why this initial training is so important. Every sub has different needs. Different pain thresholds. Some women can reach subspace just from humiliation or being out in public. Others reach it by being bound and flogged. I won't know what kind of sub you are until we try a few things."

"Then why stop the scene now?" I glanced at the cross, wondering if I could count on my legs to get me there.

"Because, you aren't ready yet. You might think you are, but everything is so new." He offered me a smile. "We'll get there, I promise. Baby steps. What you're feeling now is what we like to call subfrenzy. You want to try everything—to say you've done it as well as to prove to me you're willing and able to submit."

"But I am."

"I know, but we all have our limits. Quite honestly, I'd rather not reach yours. Not in a single day. Remember, we go at my pace. You can suggest things and even question my judgment, but at the end of the day, it falls to me. If you cannot be patient, perhaps a more aggressive Dom is closer to what you're looking for."

Subspace. Subfrenzy. What the hell was up with all these terms?
Just do as he says. Besides, you won't be able to find a Dom in one day.
I could if I put an ad online.
Dangerous though.

No, Jake was right. Besides, if I wasn't ready to be bound the way I saw Master Devlin do to Marisa, then I probably wasn't ready to try everything else. Curled up in Jake's arms, I was almost asleep when he shook me awake.

"We should probably get a shower," he mused aloud. "I bet you're starved."

"Now that you mention it." I grimaced at my growling stomach.

"Come on." He helped me off the bed and led me to one of the adjoining rooms in the dungeon.

"You have a bathroom down here?"

"Among other things, yes." He paused to turn on the faucet and let the water run as he spoke. "This is a part of aftercare. You know how athletes usually need a shower after they train?"

"Yes."

"This is the same idea. It's to keep your muscles relaxed, which is also why the water is cool. Once we're done in here, we'll go and get something to eat."

I stepped into the shower when he drew back the curtain and immediately wanted to jump out of it again. "That's freezing."

"Blame your endorphins. They keep you warm for a long while, but when they bail on ya..." He shrugged.