Alma Mater (39 page)

Bunny snapped to attention, her mental clarity returned. "Get out
of the car."

"Now, Aunt Bunny . . .

"Vic, get out of the car."

"No."

"Then fasten your seat belt. It's going to be a bumpy ride." She laughed hollowly. "Always wanted to say that line."

Vic fastened her seat belt, frantically trying to think of something
to say. Bunny swung around to the front of the dealership, turned on
her bright lights to add to the terror, gunned the motor, and drove
straight through the plate-glass window into the command center.

Glass shattered everywhere. Hojo, when she saw the lights, uncoupled herself from Don, scrambling over the top of the command post. She ran like hell for the side door and made it to her truck.

Don, a step slower and somewhat hampered by his erection, the
head of his cock as red as Santa's suit, managed to get down behind the
command post as the car hit it.

Motor still running, Bunny rolled down her window. "The divorce
papers will be on your desk tomorrow. Merry Christmas." She backed out over the crunching glass.

"Aunt Bunny," Vic gasped. "We'll never make it back home. Your tires are punctured."

"You're right. Go grab a set of keys. In fact, let's take the big black
truck out front. I own half of the dealership now . . . independent of
that bastard! It's my Christmas present to you." She slammed the door,
grabbing her beloved binoculars as Vic sprinted to the key board. She
scanned the keys, found the set for the black
1980
Ram half ton, and
hurried back, taking Bunny by the elbow. She didn't want Don to
come out from wherever he was hiding and inspire Bunny to do God
knows what.

They heard Hojo floor her red truck as it careened around the
front of the dealership.

"I'll attend to that filthy whore later."

"Good idea. Come on, Aunt Bunny. Do you have your purse?
Everything you need from your car?"

Bunny turned back and grabbed her purse. Then, her emotions fluctuating between battle euphoria and an impending sense of dread, she allowed Vic to lead her out to the new truck.

They drove back to Surly Crossing in silence. They had no sooner
stepped through the back door than Bunny, on sight of her sister, burst
into heart-wrenching sobs. Frank, Mignon, and Chris came into the kitchen to see if they could help.

. R. J., her arms around Bunny, said to her husband, "Maybe a Scotch
would help settle her nerves." She turned to Mignon. "Honey, bring Aunt
Bunny some cheese and crackers . . . and a Scotch on the rocks."

"I never want to see him again!" Bunny raged.

"Come on, let's go to the living room." R. J. guided Bunny.
Piper, under the tree, thumped her tail in greeting.

Mignon put a plate of cheese and crackers on the coffee table and
handed Bunny her drink. A fire filled the room with dancing light, the
cheery wood releasing its intoxicating aroma.

R. J. put Bunny on the sofa and sat next to her. Frank stood, not
sure what else to do. Mignon plopped in a wing chair, as did Chris.
Vic stood next to her father.

"Frank, draw up divorce papers."

"Let's wait a day or two," he advised, his voice soothing.

"No. Give me those divorce papers as a Christmas present. I'm not
backing down, and I'm not changing my mind. He's had one woman
too many. And I'm giving the truck outside to Vic."

"Aunt Bunny, I don't . . ."

Bunny cut Vic off. "I could have hurt you. I know what I did was
foolish but" —she laughed bitterly— "it was worth it."

R. J. wrinkled her nose for a minute, her eyebrows darted upward
_;
then she composed herself_ "Bunny, what did you do?"

"Drove through the plate-glass window. Caught them in the act on
that damned command center—which I designed."

R. J. looked at Vic.

"She did drive through the window. We left the car there because
of the glass. I guess Uncle Don will come up with some explanation for
the police and the insurance company."

"'I was fucking my receptionist when my wife drove through the

plate-glass window.' Bet the claims adjustor would love that." Bunny
laughed and cried simultaneously.

"Have a sip, honey." R. J. held the glass up for Bunny.

"I don't want a drink. I want a divorce." She pointed her finger at
Vic. "Think twice, Victoria, think twice. Charly may be wonderful
now, but in middle age, men just . . . unravel."

Frank ignored this. "Would you like me to go down to the dealer
ship and see if I can find Don?"

Bunny, red-eyed, thought about this. "I don't care if he's dead."

Frank stared at R. J. for a minute. "You know, we don't want this
getting in the papers in the wrong way. Girls, don't wait supper
on me."

"If you see my sorry husband, my soon-to-be ex-husband, tell him
I never want to see his face again and that next time
kill him."

Frank didn't respond. He left the room, put on his long Brooks
Brothers camel-hair coat, worn thin at the elbows, and opened the
back door, letting in a blast of cold air,

"Dad." Vic followed him into the hall. "Do you think Uncle Don
will rat on her to the sheriff?"

"No, but if the sheriff should swing by, do not under any circum
stances let Bunny talk to him. But I think your Uncle Don is probably
glad to be alive at this point." He clapped on his hat and left.

Mignon came up behind Vic. "Bad, huh?"

"Not good."

"That was pretty cool, though,"

"Not if you were sitting next to her." Vic shook her head.
"I knew."

"Knew what?"

"That Uncle Don was banging Hojo."

"Jesus, Mignon, why didn't you say something?"

"Because I can keep a secret," she replied with pride. "I caught
them kissing once."

"So that's why Hojo pierced your ears even though she knew damn
well Mom would have a fit."

"It's not like I blackmailed her." Mignon closed the front door. The
cold was making her shiver.

"I forgot I left it open." Vic wondered where her mind was. "You
did the right thing, not to tell. There wasn't anything Mom could have
done about it or me. And no one wants to tell anyone their husband
is sleeping with someone else. You know what happens to the messen
ger who brings bad tidings." She ran her forefinger across her throat.
"Come on, we'd better get back in there."

The two sisters returned in the middle of another one of Bunny's
impassioned attacks.

The stricken woman fixed on Vic as she entered the room. "Mark my words. You get a prenuptial. Every piece of jewelry he gives you
during the marriage is yours. Every piece of property, stocks, bonds,
anything of value, half because you earned half of it. I know you're
in love, but you do this. Now." She pointed to the big ring on Vic's finger.

Tears slid down Chris's face. Vic walked over, sat on the edge of the chair. "It's okay. Come on, Chris, it's okay."

All of the day's emotions were catching up to Chris.

Bewildered, Mignon sat down in the other wing chair.

Bunny slowed down her own crying for a moment. "You, too,
Chris. Mark my words!"

Chris reached up for Vic's hand.

"It's been a wild day." Vic held Chris's hand.

"What do you have to cry about?" Bunny thought perhaps her be
havior had triggered Chris.

"Here." Mignon, trying to be helpful, had fixed Chris a Scotch.

"I suppose seeing me doesn't make marriage look appetizing."
Bunny wiped her eyes with the tissue R. J. handed her. "But you must
draw up the proper papers. I don't give a damn how much you love
him now."

Vic breathed in and then exhaled slowly. "Mom, Aunt Bunny,
Mignon, I'm not going to marry Charly Harrison."

Even Bunny stopped crying to stare.

R. J. picked up Bunny's Scotch for a sip and then handed it back to
her sister, who thought another blast was not such a bad idea.

"Wow." Mignon blinked.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," Chris said as she cried anew.

Vic patted her back again. "There's nothing to be sorry about. It's
all settled."

Bunny asked the obvious question. "Just what the hell is going on?"
"I'm pregnant," Chris simply stated, drying her eyes.

R. J., puzzled, tried to soothe Chris. "These things happen, dear—we'll help you. But what does this have to do with Vic and Charly?"
"Charly is the father," Vic calmly explained.

"I told you men were shits!" Bunny fumed. "I'll kill him, too." Then
she turned on Chris. "How could you betray your friend like that? And
this whole family, which has only shown you hospitality?"

"Aunt Bunny, stop. It's not like that." Vic's voice was like ice.

As she had never spoken in such a tone to her aunt, it guaranteed

silence. But only for a moment. Bunny couldn't stop herself.

"What else could it be? They both betrayed you!" Bunny practi-

cally shrieked.

"No, they didn't."

R. J., very quietly, suggested, "Perhaps you can enlighten us."
Mignon got out of the wing chair to stand next to Vic. She didn't

know what was coming, but she knew she wanted to back her sister.
Vic stood up, too, but kept a hand on Chris's shoulder. "It was a

twist of fate."

"In my limited experience," Bunny sarcastically said, "pregnancy is
not caused by a twist of fate."

"In this case, it was." Vic breathed in again and then exhaled. "We all went to bed together. No one betrayed anyone."

"Wow." Mignon's eyes grew as big as the Christmas balls.

"You all?" Bunny was trying to compute this, but her mind was
muddled.

"Charly, Chris, and myself."

"Victoria." R. J. reached for the Scotch again.

"Mother, it wasn't a bad thing. In fact, it was a beautiful thing. It
just happened. We were happy. We were in love."

"Love?" Bunny cast a jaundiced eye. "Men don't sleep with other
women when they're in love with you."

"But they do," Vic quietly asserted. "I instigated it. It was all about
love."

"I see,"
R.
J. said simply.

"Get rid of the baby," Bunny spat out. "Don't ruin three lives."
"No." Chris found her voice.

"She's not ruining three lives. Charly, Chris, and I talked it over.
Chris and I will raise the baby."

"What?" R. J. nearly choked then started crying.

Vic went to her mother. "Mom, it's all right. Don't cry. Please don't
cry."

"Honey, I'm just so sorry for you. I know you love Charly and he loves you. You don't have to give him up and well,
I
just don't under
stand this."

"She'll find another rich one. With Vic's beauty, she could marry a
goddamned Arab sheik and own half the world's oil."

"Aunt Bunny, I'm not going to marry."

"You say that now. It will pass."

"Mom, would you like another drink?" Vic handed her the glass.
"That depends." R. J.'s green eyes sought out her daughter's.

"I love Charly, but I'm in love with Chris. So you see, this is the

right thing to do."

Mignon stood stock still.

"What are you talking about?" Bunny crossly said.

"I'm gay."

"Then
I
want my truck back!"

R. J. put her glass on the coffee table and gathered her composure.
"This must be very painful for you, for both of you." She looked at
Chris.

"Jesus, R. J., slap her face." Bunny stood up, but R. J. pulled her back down. "Vic, you need a vacation from yourself. You'll come to
your senses," Bunny continued.

"But I have. I'm glad I realized this before I . . . Well, it doesn't mat
ter now. The three of us have made our decision, and it's a good one."

"I don't see how telling us that you're a lesbian can be a good
decision."

"That part's not a decision, Aunt Bunny," Mignon said, taking up
for Vic.