Authors: Dianne Blacklock
âAnd you've been seeing her ever since?'
He nodded. âI couldn't stay away from her, I felt like a different person around her. I was happy. She was so easy to be with, so undemanding. And we could talk about everythingâ'
âNot quite everything,' Stella suggested, raising an eyebrow.
Mac sighed. âAnyway, I kept telling myself we were just friends.'
âHow did you convince yourself of that?' she asked dubiously.
âWell, by not having sex with her.'
âReally? At all?'
âNot at first. I thought that as long as I didn't sleep with her, I wasn't cheating on Anna.'
Stella rolled her eyes. âDid you kiss her?'
âMm,' he murmured sheepishly.
âLike a friend, or like a
boy
friend?'
Mac looked embarrassed.
âAnd throughout all this, Georgie didn't wonder what was going on?'
âWell, she did, which is why the abstinence didn't last, and eventually we slept together.' He sighed. âAnd then everything changed. I knew it could never be the same with Anna. I felt torn, like I was two different people, loving Anna because I always had, but barely able to touch her any more. And more in love with Georgie than I thought was
possible, and barely able to keep my hands off her. I knew I wanted to be with Georgie, but I didn't want to hurt Anna. What kind of a man leaves a woman who can't have children?'
âIs that why you wanted to leave her?'
âOf course not! But that's how it would look. It's what Anna's thinking.'
Stella sipped her wine. âHow is she taking all this?'
He sighed heavily. âShe flew up to Noosa on Saturday to stay with her parents, break the news to them.'
Anna had arranged everything by the time he got home Friday night. Of course, she hadn't expected him to be back from seeing Georgie so soon, if at all. She'd booked her flight and packed her bags. She told him she hated him for what he was about to make her put her parents through.
âShe wants me out before she gets back,' Mac finished.
Stella sighed. âThat's pretty extreme. After how many years?'
âFourteen.'
âThere's no hope for reconciliation?'
He shrugged, looking uncomfortable.
âWhat?' said Stella.
âNothing.'
She considered him. âYou don't want to reconcile with Anna, do you?'
He didn't answer.
âYou really want to be with Georgie?'
Mac nodded. âBut she won't even answer my calls. She's devastated.'
âAre you surprised?'
âI don't know, I knew she'd be sensitive about it. Her dad had an affair that really tore her mother and the whole family apart. I suppose that must affect her.'
âYou think?' Stella exclaimed.
âLook, I expected her to be angry, shocked definitely. But once she knew that I wanted to be with her, that I was going to leave Anna for her . . .'
âShe probably doesn't believe you.'
âWhy shouldn't she believe me?'
âOh for crying out loud, Mac, it's what every married man says he's going to do. And you've been lying to her since the day you met. How could she think otherwise?'
He looked crestfallen. He picked up his glass and drank down a couple of mouthfuls. âWhat was that saying about the pig?'
âWhat?
Porca miseria
?'
âMaybe we should drink to that?'
âThat might be bad luck, I would imagine,' said Stella.
Mac nodded. He leaned towards Stella after a while. âYou said before that you do feel sorry for me.'
âAnd that I don't.'
âBut could you tell me why you do?'
Stella sighed. âBecause I know you're a good guy, Mac. Because I know you've been through a lot of shit in the last few years, and I know you've been unhappy. And you have as much right to be happy as the next person. But not like this.'
âWhy not?'
âBecause you can't only consider yourself. You're a married man, and Anna hasn't done anything wrong, Mac. She doesn't deserve this.'
âGeorgie hasn't done anything wrong either.'
âNo, that's right. The buck comes to a screaming halt right at your feet, Mac.'
âSo I'm a cheating, lying bastard and there's no hope for me?'
âOf course there's hope for you. There's always hope. But you have to do the right thing.'
âWhat's that?'
âI don't think you need me to tell you that.'
âGeorgie, it's for you,' said Nick, waving the phone.
She looked alarmed for a moment but Nick shook his head. âIt's not him. It's Adam.'
They were all under strict instructions not to allow Liam to talk to her. He had left her alone for the first two days, but the calls had started Wednesday night. He rang Nick and Louise's, he rang the shop, he rang her mobile so many times she had to leave it off permanently. He'd literally begged Louise to let him talk to her, but she wouldn't be swayed. She said it wasn't her decision to make, it was up to Georgie. Georgie said to tell him she would talk to him when hell froze over. Which Adam took great pleasure in
relaying next time Liam phoned the shop. He'd at least had the sense not to turn up anywhere. He was probably too ashamed to show his face.
Nick passed Georgie the phone. âHi Adam, how are you going?'
âI'm all right. What about you, kiddo?'
Georgie smiled. She was five years older than him and he was calling her a kid. Adam had come over all protective of her.
âMe and Louise were just talking. We thought we might pick up Thai takeaway and some beverages of the alcoholic persuasion and have a bit of a party tonight. Are you up for it?'
âI don't know, Ad.'
âCome on, it's Friday night.'
âIs it?'
âLouise reckons you need to get drunk.'
âOh, does she?'
âYep, she reckons all the moping and the long solitary walks and watching
Oprah
is bad for you. You have to face the demons head on.'
âThrough a haze of alcohol?'
âIt helps to face the demons with a little Dutch courage.'
Georgie didn't say anything.
âCome on,' Adam coaxed. âI'll even get the Thai from your favourite place.'
âThe one down at the beach?'
âThat's right. So come on, what do you say?'
Georgie hesitated. âOnly if we don't mention, you know . . .'
âWhatsisname?'
âI really don't want to talk about him.'
âSuits me.'
âI mean it, Adam, I don't even want to hear his name.'
âYou won't hear it from me.'
âLiam MacMullen is a fucking bastard,' Georgie slurred.
Nick and Adam held up their glasses, a little wobbly.
âNo, worse than that,' she declared. âHe's a fucking . . . fuck.'
âCan someone actually be a fuck?' Nick mused. âI mean, it's a verb, isn't it?'
âI've heard it used as a noun,' said Adam. âOn
The Sopranos
they're always calling each other fucks.'
âOh sure,' said Georgie expansively. âYou can call someone a fuck. It's a very versatile word.'
âI'll give you that,' Nick agreed. âIt can be used in just about any context.'
Adam was nodding. âSomeone can be fucking great or fucking stupid.'
âYou can get fucked, fuck off, fuck up . . .'
âA bloke can be a fuckwit, a woman can be fucking gorgeous.'
âOr you can use it as an exclamation,' Georgie added. âFuck! Whether you've kicked your toe or won the lottery.'
âWorks just as well either way.'
They all nodded sagely.
Louise walked outside to join them. âYou know
you can hear you lot all the way upstairs, and I'm not so sure Molly's asleep yet.'
They were sitting out on the back deck with about thirty mosquito candles, coils and torches burning around them in a circle, as though they were warding off wild animals. Which was probably not far from the truth, considering the size and voracity of the mosquitos in these parts.
âSorry, Lulu-Belle,' said Nick, grabbing Louise around the waist and nuzzling against her.
âNick!'
âIsn't she beautiful?' Nick grinned wildly at the others.
âMost beautiful woman here,' declared Adam. â'cept for Georgie.'
âNo, she's more beaufidult, beaufitul, bulefit . . . she's way better looking than me,' Georgie finished.
âYou're all pissed,' Louise sighed.
âIt was your idea.'
âI know.' She looked at Georgie. âIs it helping?'
Georgie had dropped her head on Adam's shoulder. âHmm?'
âWe're not allowed to talk about whatsisname,' Adam stated emphatically.
âThat's all she's been talking about,' said Louise.
âNo, we're not allowed to, it's a rule. Rule number one.'
âAnd rule number two,' Nick added, âis . . . he's a fucking arsehole.'
âNo, fucking fuck!' insisted Georgie, lifting her head.
âDon't start that again,' said Louise.
âSorry. No more swearing, guys.' Nick held a finger to his lips. âThe children,' he added, pointing upwards.
Georgie groaned. âLiam's got children.'
âYou don't know that, Georgie,' said Louise.
âI bet he has. Two or three. Two boys and a girl. Or two girls and a boy.'
âOr maybe they're twins,' Adam said.
âBastard,' Nick muttered.
âPoor little kids,' Georgie sighed. âPoor little Katie and Sara . . . and . . .'
âJethro,' said Nick.
âThey haven't got a daddy any more,' Georgie whimpered sorrowfully.
âGeorgie,' said Louise squarely, âhe's not dead.'
âHe will be after I kill him.'
âYou couldn't kill anyone,' said Adam. âI'll do it for you.'
âYou're sweet, Ad. But I want to do it, really. I hate him with all my heart.'
âI don't think you can hate someone with your heart,' said Nick. âYou can only love with your heart.'
âHe's right,' said Adam seriously. âYou hate with your guts.'
âNo, you hate someone's guts, not
with
your guts,' Nick explained.
âWell, I hate him from my guts with all my heart,' Georgie declared. âAnd I don't want to talk about him any more.'
âOkay.'
âOkay.'
And the three of them clinked glasses.
Louise looked at her watch. She gave it thirty seconds. She watched Georgie drain her glass and reach for the bottle.
âI'll do that for you,' said Adam.
âOh, thanks, Ad,' she gushed. âYou're such a nice guy.' She watched him fill her glass. âWhy aren't you married, Adam?'
âNobody's ever asked me.'
Georgie sighed. âLiam's married, you know.'
âFifteen seconds.'
âWhat was that, Louise?'
âNever mind.'
âWhat do you think his wife's like?' Georgie continued.
They all mulled it over for a moment.
âMaybe she let herself go,' offered Nick.
âWhy do you say that?' asked Louise.
âAll those kids, Katie and Sara and Jethro.'
âAnd the twins,' Adam chimed in.
âIt must have taken it out of her.'
âSo that gives him an excuse to run off and have an affair?' Louise couldn't believe she was joining this nonsensical conversation.
âI didn't say that, I didn't mean that.' Nick's eyes were closed. He was sitting upright with his eyes closed. Louise knew the end was at hand.
âWhat did you mean?' she asked him.
âAbout what?' he frowned, peering out at her.
âYou said Liam's wife had let herself go.'
âBut I've never met Liam's wife. How would I know that?'
âGod,' Louise groaned.
âLiam said they had problems. Things “weren't right”,' Georgie said, making quotation marks in the air. âWhat the fuck does that mean?'
âIt means,' Adam made quotation marks in the air as well, â“I want to get into your pants”.'
âBastard.' Georgie hiccupped.
âI think you have to see him, Georgie,' said Louise. âOr at least talk to him.'
âWhy?'
âTo get some answers. You're making up all this stuff about him, giving him a family, when you really have no idea.'
âBut I don't want to talk to him . . . ever again.'
âYou won't have to after that. But at least you'll have all the facts. You'll have . . .' Louise hesitated, reluctantly making quotation marks in the air, â“closure”.'
They all paused, looking at the space where “closure” was hanging in the air.
âShe's right, you know, Georgie,' said Nick, closing his eyes again.
âI don't think so,' said Adam.
âYou're a brave man,' Nick muttered. âLouise is always right. You can take her word for it.'
âI think it'd be a big mistake for Georgie to see Liam again. Big mistake,' Adam repeated gravely.
âWhy? She needs to get him out of her system,' said Louise.
Adam was shaking his head. âYou can't trust guys like Liam. He'll spin her some line and she'll believe it. You know what she's like.'
âHe's right,' Nick nodded slowly, âshe'll believe anything.'
âHello, I'm still here, aren't I?' Georgie interrupted. âOr did I leave the room when I wasn't looking? I do that sometimes and it really shits me.'
âOkay, I'm breaking this up,' said Louise firmly. âI'll drive you home, Adam.'
âNo, it's late, you can't do that.'
âLet him stay,' Georgie pleaded.
âWhere? You're in the spare room.'
âBut it's a double bed, there's plenty of room. You don't mind sleeping with me, do you, Ad?'
âMind? I thought you'd never ask.'
Louise shook her head. âCome on, Adam, I'm taking you home before you two do something you'll regret. Nick . . .
Nick!
'
âHmm?' he grunted, lifting his head sharply before it hit the table.
âGet your sister to bed, or you get your brother to bed, Georgie. Whatever, work it out between you. But please do it without waking the girls.'