Altar Ego (6 page)

Dominic’s driver dropped me off at the end of the road, and I walked slowly to the house, not really sure of what I would find when I got there.  Adam’s car wasn’t parked on the drive, and I was pleased. I couldn’t face him right now. I didn’t want to speak to him, and I certainly wasn’t interested in anything he had to say to me.

I fumbled in my bag for my keys, and let myself in.

Once inside, I wandered from room to room, taking in the state of the place. Everything was as I left it the night before. The table still set and the sink in the kitchen still overflowing with dirty dishes. Our desserts were sitting on the tray untouched. I sat down at the table, put my head in my hands and cried. I could not stop the flow of tears and I had absolutely no idea what I was crying for.

I don’t think I was crying for Adam. He had hurt me beyond all of my expectations and frankly, he did not deserve my tears.

My phone rang from inside my handbag. The strains of ‘Dancing Queen’ rang out and I couldn’t help but smile. I dug it out of my bag and hit the answer button.

“Hey sweety.” I tried to sound chirpy.  It was Max, and I had never been so happy to hear his voice.

“What’s up Princess?” Instantly he knew there was something. We were so in tune with each other, we always had been. Each of us knowing and feeling the other one’s pain.

“I’m okay.” I don’t know who I was trying to convince. Him? Or me?

“Yeah whatever...now tell me.” He replied. His voice was just the calming influence I needed. I wiped a tear from my cheek and poured out the whole sorry story of what had gone on between Adam and me. He listened intently to every word and then he said.

“Get in the car Elise. Pack your bags and come and stay with me.”

I paused before speaking. I didn’t want to put him out.

“Don’t even think of telling me that you don’t want to put me out or get in the way etc etc.”  He was smiling as he spoke. I could tell.

I smiled.

“Okay.” I spoke quietly. “I will see you soon.”

I ended the call and moved away from the table. I was on autopilot as I went upstairs and pulled out two suitcases from the top of the wardrobes. I Threw them on the bed and opened them up, before methodically going through my clothes. I folded everything neatly and managed to pack most of it into the two cases. I filled a vanity case with my toiletries, and when I had finished I stood at the dresser staring at my reflection.

I looked a mess; my eyes were red and my skin blotchy. I glanced down and saw the silver photo frame which took pride of place. In it was a picture of Adam and I at our 20
th
wedding anniversary. We looked like the perfect couple. How wrong could I have been? I slammed it face down on the dresser, not caring that the glass made a splintering sound as I did so. I slipped off my wedding ring and placed it on top of the upended frame.  I was about to make a new start and I did not need a piece of gold to weigh me down.

Satisfied that I had cleared out everything I needed. I took the cases downstairs and placed them by the door. I went into the study and sat down at Adams desk. I opened the drawer and pulled out the fire box. I removed my passport and my birth certificate. Then I walked out of there closing the door behind me with a slam. It was not a room I had any intention of spending a single minute longer than I needed to in.

Finally I picked up my laptop and my handbag and I opened the front door.

I put the cases in the boot of the car and threw my handbag on the passenger seat. As I moved round to the driver’s side I heard Adams car pull up. I groaned to myself and got into the driving seat anyway.

“Elise?” He got out of his car and crossed the drive. “Where are you going?” He asked. He looked tired, and run down. I for a brief moment felt a little guilty for just leaving him like this but I held my resolve.

“I’m leaving Adam.” I started the ignition and put the car in gear, reaching for the door to close it.

“Wait!” He shouted. His hand was firm on the handle preventing me from closing the door and therefore stopping me from driving away.

“The kids...What do I tell them?” He looked forlorn and the sadness in his eyes was apparent.

“Tell them that you don’t love me anymore.” I said brusquely and I pulled on the door till it slammed and reversed down the drive. I didn’t give him a chance to stop me again, turning the car quickly and pulling away from the house without a second glance.

Max lived in a large Victorian terrace. He had bought it for a great price years ago when it was run down and we had spent months ripping it apart and rebuilding it room by room. It was stunning now, with all the original features restored and muted colours and creams everywhere. I did help with the interior design, but to be honest, Max had most of the ideas himself. He had a keen eye for design and even with my training he could pull things off that I wouldn’t even attempt.

I parked on the street and leaving the cases in the boot, I grabbed my bags out of the passenger seat and headed for his door.

I didn’t bother to knock, just walked in and closed the door behind me.

“Max!” I called. The sound resonating around the vast open hallway with its mosaic tiled floor.

“I’m in here.” He called back from the kitchen. I wasn’t surprised. He was always in the kitchen, even when he wasn’t working.

I headed for the largest room in the house, my nostrils assaulted by the aroma of garlic and cream. He was preparing my favourite pasta and I smiled at his thoughtfulness.

“I should have married you, you know.” I said as I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him tightly.

“You don’t have a cock Princess; I think we would both be disappointed at the lack of bedroom action.” He laughed a loud guffaw and turned to return my hug. I melted into his arms. I felt secure with Max. He knew me better than everyone, and never expected a single thing from me. We were soul mates, well apart from the fact that he was gay. Other than that he really was the perfect man.

We sat at the massive solid oak table in his regency style dining room for hours, filling our faces with delicious creamy pasta and crunchy brushcetta, while the wine flowed freely. It is safe to say we were both a little squiffy by 9pm.

I opened up to him and filled him in on the details of the dinner I had cooked for Adam, and everything that he had said.

“Oh Princess...” He squeezed my hand across the table. “What are you going to do?”

“I can’t go back there Max.” I told him. “I have to learn to stand on my own two feet.”

“You are strong Elise, if anyone can do it, you can.” He told me affectionately.

“I don’t feel strong.” I admitted. “I feel drained.”

He stroked his thumb across the back of my hand, noticing that I was no longer wearing my rings.

“Go and run a bath, I’m going to grab your cases and then I will come and wash your hair for you.”  He stood up, pulled me to my feet and held me close to his chest. “I love you Elise, and we WILL get you through this I promise.”

“I love you too.” I whispered.

I lay languishing in the hot bubbles, my leg resting on the side of the huge claw foot tub and the steam enveloping me. I felt all my troubles drain away while I soaked and the sounds of Max moving about downstairs were comforting to say the least. I closed my eyes and let myself drift off to another place. To a place which took me by surprise.

I was leaning against a soft velvet covered wall, with my wrists bound above my head. I was blindfolded and the room around me was silent. I bit my lip as I heard the slight creaking of an opening door, and I sensed another body in the room. It was him. That scent. I would recognise it anywhere. I took a huge breath in through my nose and inhaled as much of him as I could.

“Elise.” I was roused from my dreamy state by Max calling my name.

“Wow. Where were you?” He laughed. You looked like you were having fun wherever you were.” He winked and reached for the shampoo bottle. He ignored my blushes and knelt by the side of the tub. He squeezed a generous amount of the divine almond scented shampoo on to his hand and began to massage my scalp. It was so relaxing that my eyes closed as I dropped my head back and let his hands take away all of the stresses of the day.

“Don’t you be drifting off to your special place again.” He said with a laugh.

“Why?” I asked with a wry smile on my face. “Are you jealous?”

He laughed.

“No, but I am intrigued.”

I didn’t reply, just smiled. I wasn’t sure I wanted to share these particular inner thoughts with him just yet. He rinsed off the soap and sat back on his heels.

“Shall we go out?” He asked. “Get out of this shithole and dust off the cobwebs.”

“It’s late Max. Where were you planning on taking me?”

He grinned.

“I have this friend who can get us into an exclusive club, it’s all very secretive.”

I couldn’t help but gasp as I attempted to convince myself that it couldn’t possibly be the same place. Or could it? I bit my lip nervously. Should I throw caution to the wind?

“Fuck it.” I stood up in all my naked glory. “Let’s go and choose an outfit.” I laughed as Max helped me out of the tub.

“That’s my girl.” He kissed my forehead and wrapped his dressing gown round me. “I will just go and make a call.”

I rough dried myself with a towel that was hanging on the nearby rail, and headed through to the guest room. My cases were at the foot of the bed, and I lifted them on to the satin throw and unzipped them.

By the time Max came in I had already laid out a plain black pencil skirt and a sheer white blouse with billowing sleeves. I was in the process of selecting a vest top to wear underneath it, when Max reached past me and picked up a lacy black push up bra.

“Do yourself a favour Princess.” He said waving the bra around in his hands. “Leave the vest at home.”

I acted shocked.

“Maxwell! How dare you suggest that I dress like a slut?” All the time we were both sniggering away like teenagers.

He handed me the bra.

“Seriously.” He disappeared and returned within a few minutes wearing fitted black jeans and a fitted white v necked t-shirt. His biceps were pronounced by the tightness of the sleeves and his tribal tattoo fully on show.

I dressed quickly and tousled my hair with the dryer, opting for minimal makeup, just mascara and lip gloss. My skin was pretty good for my age and I had never been one for plastering loads of foundation on.  I turned to Max just as he handed me a glass of wine.

“Will I do?” I asked taking a sip of the burgundy liquid.

“You look a knockout.” He said and raised his glass. “Now drink up, and get your shoes.  We don’t have long.”

I drained the glass, slipped my feet into a pair of spotty heels and we both headed downstairs. We had just reached the hallway when a car pulled up outside.

“That’s us.” Said Max. “Come on.”

He opened the door and I did a double take as I saw the car outside. The number plate was familiar and I smiled to myself as we walked down the steps and headed for the street.

The driver was stood with the door already open and I slid into the back seat, swiftly followed by Max. The door was closed and the driver got in the front.

“You know the score Max.” He said.

Max reached into the centre console and pulled something out.

“Sorry Princess, rules are rules.” He said.

I tried to look surprised as he slipped the blindfold over my head before putting his own on. He sat back and gripped my hand tightly. I started counting silently in my head, which was silly as even if our destination was the same, our starting point was different.  Max didn’t speak, I only knew he was still there from the occasional squeeze he gave my hand.

When the car slowed to a stop, and the door was opened, I heard a male voice.

“Good evening Max.” I listened to Max greet him too, and tried to think hard whether I recognised the voice.

“Just follow me Elise.” Max said quietly and took my hand in his. It was a strange situation, only a few days ago I had been here with Dominic leading me, and I could feel the heat between my legs at the thought of him. I gripped onto the hand that Max offered me tightly and allowed myself to be lead forward. I heard the door open, and there was no doubt whatsoever that we were at Altar now. The only sound which was different was the strain of music in the distance. It had been empty when I went with Dominic, and the party was clearly in full swing tonight.

“You can take off your blindfold now Princess.”  I heard Max speak just as the inner door opened and the music suddenly seemed very loud. There was the sound of glasses clinking and people chatting. I reached my hand up to the back of my head to remove my blindfold when I picked up his scent. I turned my face toward where I thought it was coming from and almost instantly sensed him in front of me. A strong hand took hold of mine and lowered it to my side.

“Allow me.” He said, and slipped the blindfold off.

I looked up into his eyes and felt my insides melt. How on earth was I supposed to remain composed when just a look from him turned me to jelly?

“Good evening Elise.” He said as he lifted my hand and kissed my knuckles gently. His eyebrows lifted slightly as he immediately noticed the lack of rings, and his eyes travelled down over my body as he took in my outfit.

It took me a moment to realise that Max was staring at me with an open mouth, and I laughed nervously in his direction. The man stood at his side took his hand and spoke to him...

“Max. I think your friend will be fine. Shall we?”

He gestured with his head to the bar and Max just nodded. He followed his companion across the room but still kept looking back at me totally agog.

Now that we were alone, well not totally alone obviously, we were after all in a club full of people... He turned to me with a stern face, rather like a headmaster about to scold a naughty schoolgirl. I tried to rid myself of that thought immediately. I was aching for his touch already and thoughts of being scolded by him were not helping me.

“I’m surprised to see you here Elise. Why didn’t you call?” He was looking straight into my eyes; there was a hint of uncertainty, as if he thought I had planned this visit deliberately.

“I didn’t know...” I dropped my eyes to the floor. “I am staying with Max and he err...” I stammered. I was a wreck in his presence. I could barely speak and regaining composure of myself was not an option when he was around. I felt his eyes boring into the top of my head as I struggled to explain myself.

“Right!” He was abrupt. “Well, now you are here, it would be rude of me to leave it to someone else to entertain you.” He took my hand and strode across the room to the sofa we had sat on previously. He deposited me there and left me while he arranged for drinks. I looked around and saw practically everyone looking at me. They were staring and I felt uncomfortable. I was beginning to wonder whether I was dressed inappropriately when a blonde woman approached me. She sidled up to the table in front of me and perched on the edge of it. She crossed her long lithe legs, flashing stocking tops at me as she did so. She leaned back a little; she was clearly relaxed here, unlike me.

“Sooo...” She spoke slowly. “You are the latest play thing then?” She questioned me. I wasn’t really sure of what my answer was supposed to be.

“You know Dominic?” I threw a question back at her without actually giving her an answer.

“Dom?” she laughed, throwing her head back as she did so. It was loud and raucous, and I was a little embarrassed that she was drawing attention to us. “Everyone knows Dom!” she said boldly, with the emphasis on everyone. “Dom by name, Dom by nature.” She added with a lopsided smile. A smile which clearly said she had experience of him. She stood slowly and smoothed out her skirt. “Be careful!” She spoke over her shoulder as she turned to walk away. “Not everyone will appreciate him bringing his new toy here.” With that she left me, sitting stunned with an open mouth.

“Steady Roxanne. Jealousy is an ugly trait.” Dominic said to her as he passed her and placed a champagne bucket on the table. She watched him with contempt as he leaned over and tilted my chin upwards, kissing me full on the lips, flicking his tongue across my teeth as he did so. I smiled at her as he poured the champagne and she huffed like a spoiled teenager as she sashayed across the room away from us.

He handed me the flute and sat down, he was so close our thighs touched and I gulped the fizzy nectar down in one.

“Still nervous?” He asked.

I nodded.

“Well don’t be. You are a guest here and we move at your pace.” He took the flute from my hand and refilled it, placing it on the table in front of us. “But slow down with the bubbly Elise. We wouldn’t want you tipsy.” He placed his hand on my thigh and moved it slowly, deliberately up my leg, slipping between the juncture of my thighs and squeezing the tender flesh there. I jumped a little and watched his hand. He leaned in and whispered. “I’m surprised to see you here, but now that you are, I want you to remember everything that happens to you tonight.”

I couldn’t help but shiver in anticipation of what was to come.