Always (28 page)

“
Vampires.” I wasn’t sure who said the word; it seemed to come from every room and every corner of the entire house.

Vampires? My shoulders rose and fell silently. Soon I would be in full-blown hysterics. I needed to get out of that house and away from the people I had thought I knew. But they had all lied to me.

Chapter
Twenty-Nine

I heard the sound of a strangled cry echoing back to my ears–it may have been my own. I tried to take a deep breath, but my lungs had quit working properly. This couldn’t be real; none of this was real.

I covered my face with my one free hand. The fire poker had dropped to a less threatening position at my side. I couldn’t cry. I needed to get out of there, but my tears wouldn’t be held back.

“
Claudia,” Sylvia spoke up first.

I responded to her voice, but when I saw her take a step toward me, I began to panic. “No!” I backed up until I was pressed against the door. “You stay away from me.”

“
You said you wanted to know,” Marcus had joined us by the door. I hadn’t even seen him come down the steps.

“
I wanted to know your secret,” I agreed with him, “but not this. I thought maybe you had another wife.”

“
Another wife? I would never…”

“
Don’t tell me what you would never do! You’re not even human. You’re a monster!”

His shoulders rose and fell, but he didn’t respond to my verbal attack. His eyes pleaded with me for understanding, the same eyes I had thought I knew so well. This was beyond what I could understand, though.

“
Is Silango…?” I couldn’t even finish the half-formed thought.

“
He made us.”

“
You…and Sylvia and David?”

“
No. Me and my brothers.”

“
Your…brothers.” My voice dropped to barely a whisper.

“
Claudia,” Sylvia took a step forward, “in the morning, things will look better. They’ll seem normal again.”

“
I’m not staying here.” Was she insane? I couldn’t stay here with them. I reached behind me for the door handle.

“
Where will you go?”

“
Back to Hamel,” I said before I even had time to think. Where else could I go?

I threw my makeshift weapon at Marcus, who easily avoided it, and then darted through the front door and out into the dark night. It was cold and I hadn’t even had time to grab a robe, but I didn’t stop running. I had to get as far away as possible. I was glad there weren’t any people out on the street.

Marcus had once told me that he would never marry anyone–now I knew why. He should have stuck to his vows. If I had never married him, I would now be in Bath with Edmund. I might have had some regrets, a few nights of painful what ifs, but at least with Edmund, there was a hope of some form of happiness.

With Marcus, there was nothing. He was a monster–a despicable, disgusting…

My steps slowed until I was barely even walking. I had always known there was something different about Marcus. I had known that he wasn’t like other people.

But I still loved him. It didn’t matter what he was–I loved him.

If I had never married Marcus, I would have never known what it felt like to love and be loved in return. I couldn’t go back from that. There was no going back now. I stopped there in the street, my breath coming out in white little puffs.

I had to go back. I needed to get back to Marcus before he left. I needed to tell him how much I loved him and that it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter that he was a vampire– did it?

I had heard stories when I was a child about the creatures of the night. They lived on the blood of small children. They went into their bedrooms while they were sleeping and drained them of blood.

Is that why he had come to my room? But I was no child. Ryan…

My thoughts swirled around in my head, confusing me and leaving me dizzy. One thing I was sure of–the only thing I was really sure of–I loved Marcus. He loved me, too, I just knew it.

Big, fluffy snowflakes began to fall. They landed in my hair and wet my eyelashes. I turned in slow circles, trying to decide if I could run fast enough to get back to him in time. My bare feet were so cold. My chest ached from the frigid air.

When I turned in the direction of the house, a familiar figure was standing there. His dark curls glistened from the pool of light he was standing under, and snowflakes rested on the sleeves of his overcoat.

He just stood there so still, not making any move to come closer. He wasn’t glaring at me, or smiling either; he just stood there watching what I would do. I stared back, tears already pricking at my eyes.

“
Marcus,” I whispered.

He was too far away for me to hear what he was saying, but I saw his lips moving. His eyes widened just before I heard the carriage.

It was too late to move out of the way. I barely even realized what I was seeing before the horse reared up to two legs. The hooves made contact with my head and I heard the crack as it came down again on my shoulder. There was nothing I could do to stop the way my body was pulled under the large wheels.

Then it was over and everything was silent. I couldn’t hear anything but my own breathing. Was I dead? Where was Marcus? Was he okay?

In a rush, all the sound that had been sucked out of the world came back to me. There was a man screaming something and a horse was making loud noises way too close to my head. “Get that horse out of there!” someone yelled.

“
Claudia.” Marcus was there, right next to me. “Are you okay? Talk to me.” He was so worried.

“
I think so.” Why did my voice sound so strange?

“
Where does it hurt?”

“
What happened?”

“
The horse, the carriage.” His words came out in a rush. “It hit you.”

“
I was coming back to talk to you. I’m s…”

“
Shh,” he cut me off.

“
Claudia,” Sylvia was suddenly there with us.

Sylvia. I wanted to tell her I was okay and that I was sorry, but it was too hard to get the words to come out.

“
Where are you hurt?”

“
My legs. They hurt.”

“
There is so much blood,” her voice rose in panic.

“
You’re going to be okay,” Marcus murmured close to my face.

“
I know,” I croaked.

“
I’m going to take you home,” I heard him say.

I tried to tell him that it was okay. I wanted him to take me home. Even after all that happened, I knew I only wanted to be with him. Now that I was going to die, there was even more reason to be with him.

“
Should I call for the doctor?” Sylvia asked quietly.

“
It’s too late,” David answered.

I kept my eyes only on Marcus, so afraid that if I looked away, even for a second, that he would disappear. He pushed my hair away from my eyes so he could press his lips to my forehead.

“
I’ll take you home, and I’ll fix this,” he whispered fiercely.

I raised my hand to wipe the tears from his face, but I couldn’t reach him. He seemed so close to me, but I couldn’t touch him. He was like the stars in the night sky, oh so long ago–another lifetime.

I felt like I could reach out to him and yet…

His shoulders shook with his sobs. I hated to see him so sad and broken. “I’m fine,” I wanted to say to him. There were so many things I needed to tell him and he was right here in front of me, but no words would come out.

I’m sorry I was afraid of you. I’m sorry I doubted you. I should have listened to you. I should have waited for you to finish whatever business you had in London. I should never have pushed you to tell me things you didn’t want to. This is all my fault, and I’m sorry. Please don’t blame yourself. I love you. I have loved you ever since I first knew you. It hasn’t changed at all–this changes nothing. I’ll always love you, no matter what you are.

But I couldn’t say any of these things. It was like my tongue was stuck to the roof of my mouth. I could only watch helplessly as he scooped me up like a small child, as if I weighed nothing at all.

I whimpered against his chest from the pain in my legs. Once he had me off the ground, I could see that we were surrounded by a small crowd of people. I saw their mouths moving, but I couldn’t hear their words over the thudding of Marcus’s heart against my ear.

“
Is she going to be okay?” Sylvia’s voice broke through my haze.

“
I don’t know. Her heart beat isn’t strong enough.”

We moved quickly along the streets back towards home. I couldn’t believe how far I’d come, how foolish I had been. Marcus hadn’t hurt me in all this time; in fact, he had only saved me time after time. If my legs weren’t hurting so badly, I would have asked him to forgive me. If only I wasn’t bleeding from the scratches on my face and arms, I would have thrown myself at his feet. I only hoped I could tell him how sorry I was.

When we reached the house, Marcus took me into the front parlor and laid me out on one of the long couches. I tried to protest.

“
Marcus,” I gasped, “I’ll get blood all over in here.”

I knew how much the servants hated for us to make messes in the front parlor. My breath was coming too weak, though, to be able to put up much of a fight.

“
Just lie back,” Sylvia ordered gently, but firmly.

“
The mess?” But she only shook her head sadly. I was starting to feel so sleepy all of a sudden. It was so hard to keep focused on anything.

“
Claudia,” his voice came out a tortured cry.

I tried to focus only on him in those final moments of my life. I knew I was close to death, but nothing hurt. The pain in my legs was completely gone. I wanted to tell Marcus that I was okay, but I couldn’t seem to find my voice.

“
Can you hear me?”

Yes!

“
We have to change her.” I heard Sylvia’s voice from somewhere above me.

“
We can’t.” It was nice that David was there, too, but I only saw Marcus.

“
We have to,” Sylvia’s voice was raised in panic.

“
Sylvia…”

“
I’ll do it,” Marcus spoke up, but his voice sounded so far away.

Sylvia’s face was above me suddenly, floating in and out of focus. “You’re going to be just fine, honey,” her voice echoed in my head.

Sylvia.

I would miss my friend. She had become like a sister to me. I was ashamed that I had run from her. They were only trying to help. It was all my fault that this had happened, and now they would suffer, too.

“
Claudia,” Marcus was above me again, but I hadn’t seen Sylvia move. “Can you hear me, my love?”

He was starting to get fuzzy and I had to blink to bring my eyes back into focus. I wasn’t afraid of him now, though; not when he looked at me with such love shining in his eyes.

I let my shoulders sink deeper into the cushion. I was no longer concerned about the mess I would make of the lovely fabric. I just wanted to go to sleep, but Marcus was shaking me. “Claudia!”

“
Yeah,” I mumbled.

“
Just stay with me,” he pleaded. “Wake up, Claudia.”

I’m awake.
But I wasn’t sure if I said that out loud or not. My eyes felt too heavy to hold open anymore. I just wanted to sleep for a few minutes, then I would get up and do whatever he was asking of me.

I tried to tell him that, but he was gone. I couldn’t hear him or feel him any longer; he had left me. The ache I felt over his absence was so much worse than the pain I felt when the horse ran me over. I took a deep breath.

“
Someday, I’m going to touch one of those stars, Uncle Philip.”

“
Why would you want to do that for, child?”

“
I want to capture one and keep it in my pocket.”

“
You can’t hold on to that kind of beauty,” he shook his wrinkled head slowly, “No, you’re only meant to look at them.”