Always and Forever (14 page)

“Wow, I now have no idea what to say.” I admit
breathlessly.

“You haven’t got the faintest idea, have you?”

“About what?”

“About how crazy beautiful you are.” All of his playful
joking has gone and I know he’s being entirely serious.

I open my mouth to say something but realise I can’t. I’m
speechless. How does any girl respond to something like that, especially when
it’s sincerely meant?

“If that’s true then why haven’t you kissed me yet?” I
challenge him.

“Because I’m an idiot, I’m a fool and a complete waste of
space but I plan on changing that tomorrow night, if that’s ok with you?”

“That’s more than ok with me.” I reassure him.

“Thank God for that. I honestly don’t know how much longer
I can wait. I need to taste you with my mouth, Bethany.”

“Oh… wow. I-I really need to go now, Jake.” I’m practically
panting with an excruciating amount of desire for him and I seriously need to
get off the phone before I beg him to do something I’ll later be embarrassed
about.

“Ok, Bethany. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

My mouth falls open and I frown at the phone, feeling
puzzled. How can he seem so calm and composed? A few moments ago I thought he
was as turned on as I am.

“Bye, Jake.”

We both hang up at the same time and I’m left feeling
self-conscious and a little humiliated. Doubts fill my mind again but I try to
shake them off. I need to get the phone back in my pocket before my father gets
back. We were only on the phone a few minutes but it’s better to be safe than
sorry.

Just as I’m about to switch my phone off I get a text
message from Jake.

Jake: Sorry if I sounded a little cold just then. My mum
was hovering and I didn’t want her to overhear anything we were talking about.
I never knew my girl would like to tease me so badly. I don’t know whether I
should kiss you or torture you some more myself. I’ll see you tomorrow,
gorgeous and here’s some kisses until then xxxxxxx

I can’t believe he called me his girl. A part of me truly
loves all of the lavish attention he’s bestowing upon me but another part is
still a little hesitant. All of this is moving so fast, it’s all so intense. I
don’t know whether to run away or cling onto him. Either way, I know it’s going
to be one hell of a bumpy ride. I guess all I can really do is hold on tight.

I’m desperate
to see him again tonight. I thought
the phone call we had yesterday would have helped but instead it’s only made me
crave him even more. Since I spoke to him I’ve been so restless, I haven’t been
able to think of anything but him and I can’t even begin to describe how it
feels to know that I’ll be seeing him in less than an hour. It’s exhilarating,
thrilling, mind-blowing and terrifying all rolled into one. I never knew I
could experience such a heady rush of emotions and yet here I am an absolute
cliché of somebody who is head over heels in lust for a guy I hardly know.

I told mum I’m visiting gran again tonight. She isn’t happy
about it but I refuse to concern myself with that right now. I’m nervous enough
as it is about meeting Jake tonight. That phone conversation we had has left me
feeling so wound up. I’m torn between wanting to avoid his gaze all evening and
begging him to kiss me. I have no idea which side of me will win.

My father left the house like he always does and I’m glad
to say that he didn’t seem to suspect anything. He still has no idea about me
leaving the house on Friday nights. I guess I must be a better liar than I give
myself credit for.

Yesterday he returned to the bookstore like nothing had
happened and I didn’t dare ruin his good mood by asking what had caused him to
leave in such a hurry.

As soon as I leave the house I
reach for my phone to let Jake know that I’m on my way. Before I get a chance
to press send I receive a new message from him.

Jake: Are you nearly here? I’m dying to see you. Xx

I grin like an idiot as I read his text. He already sent me
one this morning telling me how thankful he was that it was finally Friday. I
quickly type out a reply and speed up my walking.

I won’t be long, Jake. On my way xx

Jake: Ok, sorry if I seem bossy but I just seriously can’t
wait another minute longer.

God, I can’t wait either, I end up walking so quickly I’m
practically jogging. I round the final corner and spot Jake in the distance. He
doesn’t notice me because he’s turned the other way and he’s so engrossed in
his phone. My own lights up and I know he’s sent me another text.

Jake: You’re close, right?

I can’t help feeling flattered; he seems to be as anxious
as I am to see one another again. I decide to stay silent and creep up behind
him, reaching up to cover his eyes with my hands.

“I’m very close.” I say softly.

He whirls around and his whole face lights up when he sees
me.

“Bethany, come here.” He says playfully as I back away from
him, grinning madly because I managed to scare him.

He walks closer towards me, a smirking, arrogant predator
who knows it’s only a matter of time before he will pounce on his victim. When
his strong hands make a grab for my waist I squeal in delight, trying to outrun
him. It’s pretty useless, Jake’s power is far beyond anything that I possess
and he’s able to catch me at once.

“Ok, I surrender! I surrender!” I yell.

“Now where’s the fun in that? You should know that I love
the thrill of the chase.” He growls into my ear.

My cheeks burn with the intensity of his words and the
pounding of my heart is so erratic I’m certain he must be able to hear it.

“What about when the chase is over, what then?”

“Angel, believe me when I tell you that I’ll still want
you.”

I flinch away from him I hear him call me that name. The
name my father has always used to refer to me.

“What’s wrong? Are you ok?” He takes a step closer towards
me with a look of concern on his face.

I take a few deep breaths, attempting to shake off my
bewildering reaction.

“I’m sorry, it’s nothing. Just ignore me.”

“I can’t forget it; you looked really scared after I spoke.
What did I say that upset you?” He persists, moving even closer into my
personal space.

“It’s just… that’s what he calls me. Angel.” I lower my
head, not wanting to witness Jake’s expression. I hate to ruin a perfect moment
by mentioning my father but my body just wouldn’t let me ignore it. I
automatically recoiled away from Jake when I heard him call me that.

“God, I’m so sorry, I had no idea. I’m really sorry,
Bethany. I never want to remind you of him.”

“It’s fine. It’s not your fault; I just couldn’t help my
reaction.”

“I swear to you that I’ll never make the same mistake
again.”

“It’s bizarre, he’s always called me his Angel and yet I’ve
always hated him.” I speak so softly I almost dare to hope that Jake didn’t
hear me. I don’t want his pity, I just want him.

“I’d do anything to get you out of that house and away from
him.” His voice is hard and determined as he tilts my chin upwards so that our
eyes meet.

“That’s impossible.” I argue.

“Nothing is impossible.” Our gaze deepens and once again I
experience that forceful and magnetic pull towards him. It’s extraordinary and
terrifying, I don’t whether to run from it or towards it.

“Every time I say goodbye to you I end up convincing myself
that I imagined how beautiful you really are. I question whether that level of
beauty really exists and then I see you again and I know that it does. It
really does.”

“Jake, I’m not beautiful, not even close.”

“You need to open your eyes and see what I do when I look at
you.” His fixation on my features is alluring and yet also unnerving at the
same time. No one has ever paid me so much attention before. No one has ever
really complimented me before, certainly not to this extent.

 His enchanting and incredibly seductive eyes burn
with intensity as he continues to stare at me, it’s as though he’s trying to
see right into my soul. The connection that I feel to him is so profound and
commanding; I couldn’t ignore it even if I wanted to.

He takes one final step closer to me so that we’re standing
chest to chest. His hand gently caresses my cheek and I tremble as I feel his
fingertips dance across my skin. Of course he notices and I spot the tiny
little smirk playing on his lips.

“Enough teasing, just kiss me already.” I’m amazed by my
own bluntness; a few weeks ago I never would have been able to imagine asking
someone to kiss me.

“You need to be patient, there’s nothing wrong with a
little teasing. I hope that you will tease me someday, although you already do
with that breathtaking lip biting of yours.” To illustrate his point, he lowers
his thumb and gently grazes the pad of it against my bottom lip that I can’t
seem to stop from quivering.

“Please.” I don’t know what I’m asking for, half of me
wants him to kiss me and the other just wants him to stop with this mind game.

 “I don’t think I can wait any longer.” His breath
flutters against my moist lips and the anticipation building up inside of me is
almost too much to bear. I hold my breath and slowly part my lips, waiting for
the magical moment. I continue to wait and when nothing happens I half open my
eyes to see what’s stopping him. His own eyes are sparkling with amusement and
mirth. He’s enjoying this and I don’t know whether to slap him or demand that
he kiss me right this minute.

“Jake?”

“Are you cold?” He asks.

I glare at him when I see another satisfied smirk on his
face. He knows exactly what he’s doing to me. Well two can play at that game…

“Maybe, what are you going to do to warm me up?” I lick my
awaiting lips and slowly drag my teeth against my plump bottom lip. His mouth
falls open and I’m thrilled to know that I’ve successfully captured his
attention.

A deep moan escapes from Jake as he abruptly grabs hold of
me and lowers his mouth onto mine. As soon as I feel the immense amount of
pressure he’s placing on me I kiss him back with the same level of intensity. I
know that first kisses are supposed to be slow and gentle but we’ve both done
enough teasing to drive the other person crazy and slow and gentle is not what
I want right now.

I’m taken by surprise when I feel Jake’s tongue cautiously
leave his own mouth and hesitantly glide over my bottom lip. I moan at the
exquisite sensation and realise that it’s silently begging me for an entrance.

“Open your mouth for me, baby.” He whispers softly as his
thumb gently traces the side of my face, trying to relax me and coax me into
submission.

When I do as he asks he gives me his most beautiful smile
and it hypnotises me. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to live without that
smile, it’s embedded its way into my heart and I never want exist without it.

I gasp when his tongue finally meets with mine and a
guttural moan escapes from Jake’s throat as my own tongue swirls against his. I
never knew a single kiss could be so erotic and I start to think about all of
the other things I desperately want Jake to do to me. I picture us together in
my mind; we’re naked, sweating and breathless as we frantically explore one
another’s bodies.

I whimper with disappointment when he suddenly breaks away
from me and ends our kiss. I look up at him and have to refrain myself from
pleading with him to continue.

“Why did you stop?”

 I can’t help but ask him. Why on earth would he end
something that felt so amazing.

“Do you want this, Bethany?”

I’m amazed by the fact he isn’t breathless like I am. His
voice is even and composed, it’s as though our incredible kiss hasn’t had any
affect on him at all. How can he remain in control when I’m an absolute mess? I
immediately feel the absence of his lips and want them more than anything in
this world. I’ll do anything to make him kiss me again even if it means I have
to be the one to initiate it. I move towards him and tilt my head up, offering
myself to him but am taken aback when his hands take hold of my shoulders and
gently push me away.

“Jake, what are you doing?”

“I asked you if you want this.” His eyes are fixated on my
face. They wander to my lips and I can see how hard this is for him, he’s battling
with himself and I can see how badly he wants to continue.

My lips are bruised and tingling from his and I wonder if
there’s a visible change in them from before we started making out.

“Yes.” I answer him.

“No, I want to hear you say it. I want to hear you say that
you want this and that you want me.” His dark brown eyes look hungry; they are
consumed by an undeniable craving for me.

“You want me to say that I want you?” I’m not even sure if
I heard him correctly.

“That’s right, say it. Tell me that you want me.” His fists
are clenching at his sides and it’s obvious that his restraint is wavering but
he’s determined to hear me say this.

I have a choice, I can choose not to give into his demand
or I can say whatever the hell he wants and feel his lips against me once more.

There really is only one choice.

“Jake, I want you. I’ve always wanted you; I want you in
every single possible way that’s imaginable. If you only knew the things I keep
imagining, the things I want you to do to me.” As soon as my words are spoken
Jake’s mouth is on top of mine. His lips are ferocious and starving, they crash
against my own and his tongue probes my mouth leaving me dizzy and light
headed.

“Fuck, tell me. Tell me what you’re imagining.” His voice
is commanding and rough, his hands drop to my waist and squeeze me firmly.

“I’m too embarrassed to say but believe me when I tell you
that it’s hot and it would make us both feel so good.”

He growls and enters my mouth once more. When his lips lock
around my tongue and start to suck my mouth falls open in shock and arousal.

“That’s right, baby. Open your mouth for me.”

God, I love the way that he encourages me and tells me
exactly what he wants. His breathing is almost as erratic as my own and I’m
amazed by the fact that I’m able to make him feel like this. I’ve never felt
anything like this before; I never knew a kiss could be so sensual. Knowing the
strong and undeniable affect I have on him makes me feel powerful and yet I
know that I would give him anything he demanded right now. He’s the one in
control and I’m more than willing to do anything I can to please him.