An Unlocked Heart(Collars & Cuffs Stories) (3 page)

EmmyBabe: Ooo! Tell me more!

MaybeGay: Not like that!

EmmyBabe: You mean, you didn’t have the hots for him?

That gave Alex pause. He couldn’t begin to list all the emotions the client with those icy blue eyes had stirred in him. He’d felt disturbed, aroused, threatened, all of the above….

EmmyBabe: You still there, Alex?

MaybeGay: Yeah, still here. Just thinking about him….

EmmyBabe: You okay, sweetie?

Alex smiled at the endearment. Emily was his closest friend from high school, and he had been overjoyed to discover her on Facebook after so long. Though his FB name had taken a bit of explaining. Although Alex had been in his late teens when he’d finally accepted he was gay, it was something he’d kept to himself. It wasn’t until only recently he’d started to be open about it. Emily had been the first person he’d come out to, and that had been made easier because it hadn’t been a face-to-face conversation. But prior to that first admittance to another soul, Alex had gone through a hefty period of denial. He’d never really wanted to be different. God knows, he’d felt like an outsider in his own family most of his life.

Emily had accepted his declaration with surprising ease. And that, in turn, had made it easier to tell David, another student in his business group, who had simply sat there, not looking the least bit surprised, and had then given Alex a hug, astonishing the hell out of him. But that didn’t mean he was about to tell his family any time soon. No fucking way. They didn’t need any more ammunition.

EmmyBabe: Where have you gone, sweetie?

MaybeGay: Sorry. Zoned out for a sec.

EmmyBabe: Sooooo—this guy?

MaybeGay: Customer in the restaurant. He freaked me out, actually.

EmmyBabe: What happened?

MaybeGay: Fuck if I know! He hardly said a word to me, but he had these blue eyes, so blue, and he kept watching me all night
.
Every time I looked across, he was looking at me.

EmmyBabe: Hot?

Alex closed his eyes for a moment, pulling the image of the man into the forefront of his mind. So tall, lean, toned, muscular… those arms had looked thick and strong, and just for a second or two, Alex allowed himself to fantasize about how they’d feel wrapped around him, pulling him close against that hot-as-fuck body. Just as quickly, though, he dismissed the delicious thoughts. There was no way a guy like that would be interested in him, a skinny, scared virgin who couldn’t even look him in the eye. A guy like that had experience written all over him.

MaybeGay: Em, can we carry this on later?

EmmyBabe: Sure, sweetie, no prob. You know how to reach me.

Alex smiled as he signed out of Facebook. Emily was a good friend. He glanced at the clock. It was nearly 1:00 a.m. Thank goodness it was his half day tomorrow. He didn’t have to be into work until five. And that meant…. He pulled up his e-mail account, just in case Rob barged back into his room and Alex needed some cover—it had happened plenty of times already—and minimized it, and then he typed in the address for the website he’d discovered last week. He glanced nervously toward the door. The last thing he wanted right now was for his mother or brother to appear. Yet another thing Alex had to hide from his family. The thought of Rob using his laptop and seeing his Internet history filled him with horror. Thank fuck he’d password-protected it.

Alex listened for any sign there was still someone up and about, but the house was silent. He figured he was safe enough. He clicked on a folder containing hardcore videos and glanced at the images. Although he’d only got into gay porn during the last few months, he’d soon worked out that watching smooth eighteen-year-old twinks didn’t interest him. His attention had been claimed immediately by the videos showing mature men fucking. He chose a video, clicked on it, set the laptop beside him on the bed, and hastily plugged in his headphones before it started. He opened his robe and ran his hands over his body, tweaking at nipples and shivering as the sensations connected directly with his cock, which was already stiffening.

He couldn’t take his eyes off the huge erections these guys were sporting. Apprehension filled him as he thought of taking something so big into his body. Christ, there was no way something that size would fit, was there? Alex palmed his half-hard cock, his breathing speeding up as he watched a muscled Adonis fucking his smaller partner. As the camera did a close-up of a cock penetrating him, Alex couldn’t hold back his shudders. Watching guys having sex was one thing. The thought of someone fucking
him
was more than he could bear to consider. Logic told him it was going to hurt, but at the same time, he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the look of rapture on the bottom’s face. Christ, but it fascinated him.

He tightened his hand around his now fully erect prick and tugged, starting to build speed, moving in time to the thrusts of the top. Oh God, the
sounds
the bottom was making! Low moans that built to a crescendo of ecstatic cries as the smaller man lay there and
took
it all, held down by the powerful top who was fucking him with long, almost savage thrusts. Alex had to bite back low moans as his orgasm built in intensity. What turned him on most, however, was the dirty talk that flowed almost constantly from the top’s lips, along with words of praise for the bottom, telling him how tight his hole was, how good it felt, how much the top was enjoying fucking him. As the video came to its inevitable conclusion, Alex closed his eyes and concentrated on the sensations flowing through him, on his balls tightening and that tingle at the base of his spine. As he finally started to come, those beautiful blue eyes swam into view, the strong jawline, and that was it. Alex was pumping come into his hand, back arched, a hand jammed into his mouth to keep back the scream threatening to escape at any moment and give him away.

Alex lay there panting, come coating his hand, struggling to regain control of his body. Where had
that
come from? The logical part of his brain may have already determined fantasizing about his mystery client was a nonstarter, but that hadn’t stopped the image of him from invading his thoughts. Alex reached for the tissues next to the bed and cleaned himself up, then put them into a little plastic bag, which was then tied. Christ, the lengths he went to. But there was no way he would ever give them the satisfaction of finding evidence he even jacked off. Life around here was bad enough without adding more fuel to the fire.

Finally, he found enough energy to rise from the bed and drag himself into the bathroom for a long-anticipated shower, late hour or not. As Alex leaned back against the tiles, the barely warm water cascading down over him as he soaped away the day, his thoughts returned to his mystery client, and he found himself hoping, despite his initial reaction to the man, he’d see him again.

Three

“Y
OU
still here?”

Leo put down his pen and looked up at Thomas, standing in the open doorway of the office, smiling. “I was just writing some notes, in case I missed you,” he said, leaning back and stretching. He’d spent most of the day sorting out the mess from the previous night and making sure the club was ready for its influx of members that evening. Although there were members who used the facilities during the day, the vast majority frequented the club during their evening hours. From 6:00 p.m. on, there would be a steady stream of members, and most would stay until the club closed at 2:00 a.m.

Thomas sat in the comfortably worn leather armchair facing him. “Yeah, it was pretty bad last night in the group room,” Thomas acknowledged with a grimace. “I was so tired, though, I couldn’t face the cleanup.”

Leo grinned. “I sort of gathered that when I went in this morning.” He shook his head. “Whoever writes romanticized accounts of BDSM clubs has obviously never been inside one. In the books, they’re always really clean. They’d have a fit if they saw what it’s like in here sometimes. I had to put Carl
and
Elliott on cleaning duty today.”

Thomas raised his eyebrows. “Wait, go back a moment—
you
read fiction about BDSM?” He smirked. “Why, Leo, I would never have guessed!”

Leo gave a sheepish grin. “I may have read the odd bit of gay erotic fiction,” he admitted, looking up at Thomas through his eyelashes.

Thomas laughed. “How long have we known each other? And yet you still manage to surprise me.” He glanced toward the coffee machine in the corner. “Oh, good man. You’ve made fresh coffee.” He got up to pour himself a mug, and then settled back into his chair, inhaling the rich aroma. “So, tell me more about these books you’re reading. You’ve piqued my interest now.”

Leo laughed. “I’ve only read a few.”

“Have you read that
Fifty Shades
….?”

Leo groaned. “Don’t even go there!” he growled.

Thomas grinned. “Okay, so it’s not
gay
BDSM fiction, I know, but I was curious to know about it. After all, everyone’s talking about it.” He met Leo’s gaze. “What’s wrong with it?” he asked innocently.

“What’s
right
with it, is more the question! It’s a fucking insult to any self-respecting Dom, that’s what it is!”

Thomas was laughing now. “She doesn’t exactly paint an accurate picture of the D/s lifestyle, then?” he said.

Leo shook his head, scowling. “Do me a favor. Don’t mention her again. As far as you’re concerned, that author is Voldemort.” Thomas knitted his brows, puzzled. Leo grinned. “She who must not be named.” Thomas burst into laughter. “Especially seeing as there are much better writers of BDSM out there. There are a lot of authors who pretty much get it right, but
some
of them! We’re talking really unrealistic situations, like a Dom walking into a bar, spotting someone for the first time, and knowing
immediately
that this guy is a natural submissive.”

Thomas chuckled. “I see what you mean.” He sipped his coffee. “Speaking of submissives….”

Leo let out a sound of sheer exasperation. “Why do I suddenly have the feeling I know
exactly
what you’re about to say?”

Thomas’s expression became more serious. “He’s been asking again—”

“No, Thomas,” he said, shaking his head. “I don’t want a sub. Please tell Dorian to stop asking.” He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. It didn’t help. He could still feel Thomas’s eyes on him. He glanced at his partner. Thomas gazed at him with eyes that betrayed his concern. “I’m sorry,” Leo said softly. “But I won’t take on another sub. I’ll still do the demonstrations, I’ll take my turn as Dungeon Master, but please….”

Thomas sighed. “Leo, you’re a good Dom, the best I ever trained, if I’m honest.” Leo’s cheeks warmed at this uncharacteristic praise. “You can’t blame them if the subs around here want to be yours. Hell, you only have to walk through the club and they’re lining up, trying to catch your eye.” Leo let out a chuckle. That was a fairly accurate description. “All I’m saying is… consider it?” When Leo shook his head, Thomas let out a sound of sheer exasperation, which made Leo look up in surprise.

“Damn it, man, you need to start living again!”

Leo gaped, shocked by the sudden outburst.

Thomas’s expression softened immediately. “I’m sorry, Leo, but… we’ve all sat by for the last two years watching you going through the motions. You haven’t been living, you’ve been… existing. It’s as if part of you just… switched off inside.” Leo became very still, his gaze directed toward the wide expanse of desk between himself and Thomas. Thomas’s voice was gentle. “Let him go, Leo. Let him go, and come back to us.”

Leo lifted his head. “I loved him, Thomas.” Thomas’s eyes grew bright, and Leo’s heart constricted in his chest. He knew Thomas had cared deeply for Gabe too. Hell, more than three-quarters of the club’s members had attended his funeral. “He was my sub. I trained him, I collared him… and then I fell in love with him.” Angrily, Leo wiped at the tears that pricked his eyes. “And he goes and fucking
dies
on me!”

And then it happened.

For the first time since Gabe’s death, Leo felt a rush of anger as he dwelled on his sub’s sudden demise. It bubbled up from some place deep inside him, so deep he hadn’t known it was there. And that anger was directed in part toward his dead lover, who couldn’t speak for himself. But that was no matter. Leo couldn’t stop the molten lava of his fury from erupting any longer.

“Why the fuck did he have to go and die? Six years, we were together. Six fucking years, and it’s all wiped out in minutes by a drunk driver.
He was only twenty-nine
,” Leo exclaimed bitterly, banging his hand flat on the desk, causing Thomas to jump. Thomas’s startled reaction brought him to his senses, and he shook, struggling to control himself with deep, calming breaths.