The angel was
blind
? Oh, as he had proved so often in the past, Jovah had an interesting sense of humor. No need for me to worry that the angel might recognize me. No need for me to fear him at all.
The thought rekindled my desire to somehow gain access to the Great House, only this time I had a clear goal: I wanted a chance to view the angel from a closer range. I couldn't even explain why I wanted to do it, except that it gave me a tremendous sense of freedom to think I could stand in the same room with an angel and not be afraid for my life. It equalized things somehow; it gave me back a measure of dignity. The balance of the world would be righted, and I could abandon the past.
Probably not; but maybe I could gaze at him in silent mockery and simply feel a sense of triumph and relief.
The next time I glimpsed the angel, I heard him sing.
I had been to all three of the angel holds; I had briefly lived in Luminaux, the Blue City that spills over with music and art. Once I had traveled to the Gloria and heard the sacred mass performed by angel choirs. I knew how easy it was to grow drunk on the music angels can make.
But I had never heard anything to match the sound of that angel's song.
This time there was more than that single sustained cry. This time there was a melody of sorts, bitter and drowned and beautiful, and every separate ravished note struck me like a copper blow. It was like being hammered by mournful metal; I felt his music pock my skin and dimple my bones. I felt it run like scattered silver through my veins.
If there were words, I couldn't distinguish them. I couldn't have said if the angel was singing a line from a traditional requiem or improvising a dirge on the spot. All I knew was that the sound made me want to fall to the ground, weeping. Instead, I turned away and blundered through the yard, back toward the school, back toward the kitchen, back to the safety of silence.
CHAPTER 2
T
hree days later, I found my way into the Great House. Jovah's hand at work, I almost believed. The god had formed the habit of making my oddest prayers come true. Maybe to make up for the fact that he had once tried to destroy me.
I had been sleeping when the messenger appeared that morning, but Judith told me he arrived on a wheezing horse and carried exciting news. The headmistress's daughter was about to be delivered of a baby, and she desperately wanted her mother on hand. The footman had hitched up the two most reliable horses, and within an hour he was driving her down the rutted road, heading toward a tricky mountain pass and west toward Castelana. There were no easy routes to any of the river cities from this side of the Caitanas, so I had to believe they would be gone at least two weeks.
During that period, there would be only one servant minding the Great House, a middle-aged woman who must surely sleep some of the time. I was not wild about the idea of sneaking through the manor under cover of darkness, to be startled by every creak and groan, but it might be my best option.
But then good fortune struck. Or disaster, depending on your perspective.
I had been awake for a couple of hours and was standing outside in the cold air before heading to the kitchen to help clean up the evening meal. I had taken my usual shaded post beside the fence that overlooked the hill leading to the Great House, and I was scanning its porch and windows. So I happened to be watching when the housekeeper stepped through a side door to shake out a rug. I saw her slip in a patch of mud and tumble to the ground, her hands bracing as her feet went flying. I saw her struggle to standâalmost accomplish the featâand then drop to the ground again, clearly in pain. I watched as she slowly and with great determination inched back toward the stoop, up the three steps, and across the threshold. She was on her bottom the whole time, pulling herself along with her hands and sheer willpower.
I paused a moment to admire her fortitude. Then I made my plans.
It was necessary first to put in an hour in the kitchen, working beside the other cooks until they had all headed off to their beds. It was close to midnight before I slipped outside, let myself out of the tall gate at the front of the complex, and climbed the path leading up to the manor. I forced myself to remain calm, to breathe evenly, as I crested the hill and headed to the side of the house where I had seen the housekeeper fall.
I stood outside the door, took one more deep breath, then stepped inside as if I belonged.
I was instantly inside the kitchen, a much smaller room than the one at the school, but meticulously maintained. It was blessedly warm after the chill outside, and I could catch the aromatic odors of meat and potatoes warming in the oven. Late as it was, the housekeeper was still awake and trying to cope with her crisis. She was sitting on the floor, her back to a wall, her legs stretched out, and a scatter of cloths all around her. She looked up in astonishment as I strolled in, all brisk confidence and breezy certainty.
“Oh, dear, I thought I saw you fall, but I couldn't get free until just now,” I said in a sympathetic tone, dropping to a crouch. “What happened? Did you twist your ankle? Or worse?”
She stared at me, speechless for a moment. I put her at about fifty, with years of hard labor showing in her thin face, but she looked tough enough still to heave a table at me, if only she could get close enough to grab the legs. Her hair was an indeterminate brown and pulled back in an impatient bun; her eyes were a narrowed green, dense with intelligence. I had the strange thought that if she and Deborah were to engage in some kind of head servants' brawl, this woman would win handily.
“Who are you?” she finally demanded. Her hands were bunched up in the cloth on either side of her skirt. I figured they were knotted against pain, but she might easily have a weapon concealed in a pocket. She didn't strike me as the type who often allowed herself to be helpless.
“I'm Moriah. I work down at the school,” I explained. Going to my knees, I scooted down toward her feet. “Can I see? I'm not a healer, but I know enough to bind your leg if it's sprained, or set it if it's broken.”
“It's not broken,” she said sharply. And then, “You're not allowed to be here.”
“I'm not,” I agreed, pulling up her hem so I could look at the damage. It was instantly clear that her left leg was the one that had given way on her. She'd managed to get her shoe off, but the whole ankle and half the foot were already showing a dark purple bruise, and the skin had puffed out in protest. “
Ouch.
That must hurt.”
“It does,” she said grimly, then repeated, “You're not allowed to be here.”
“But if I leave, no one will wrap this for you, or help you into bed, or make sure you're fed in the morning, and you could fall again and strike your head and die,” I answered cheerfully. “So let me just take care of this and get you something to eat and try to make you comfortable, and then I can leave before anyone realizes I'm here.”
She was silent a moment, clearly unwilling, but realistic enough to realize she would be in very bad shape without assistance. “Very well,” she said. “But you can't tell anyone you've been here.”
“I won't,” I promised. I glanced over with a smile. “What's your name?”
“Alma,” she said reluctantly.
A soft name for such a strong woman! “Well, Alma, I apologize in advance if I hurt you. Now let's get this taken care of.”
In less than an hour, I had wrapped her foot, helped her sit at the table long enough to eat a meal, and supported her as she hobbled into a small bedroom that opened off the kitchen. She did most of the work of stripping off her clothes and pulling on a nightshirt, but the exertion cost her a great deal; her face was drawn with pain by the time she lowered herself to the bed.
I glanced around as if looking for any final chores I should take care of. “Now, I'll just bring dinner to the angel and then come down and clean up the dishes,” I said in a matter-of-fact voice. “Then tomorrowâ”
“What did you say?” she interrupted.
I gave her my most innocent look. “I'll take dinner to the angelâ”
For the first time, she looked both nonplussed and alarmed. “How do you knowâwhy do you thinkâ”
“I've seen him. At night, on the roof. Heard him, a couple of times. I don't know what's wrong with him, but I assume he's come here for help or healing. And maybe he can make it down two flights of steps to feed himself dinner and maybe he can't.” I tilted my head to one side and watched her, my expression inquiring.
Well? Can he ? And if he can't, will you let him go hungry?
Her green eyes burned as she stared back at me, and I watched her internal struggle play out on her face. Clearly this was not a woman who easily betrayed a trust, but she could not reconcile her two warring mandates:
Take care of the angel
and
Keep the angel's existence a secret.
But, really, she had no choice, and I saw the capitulation in her face a second before she spoke.
“All right. Take a tray of food to him on the third floor. He drinks water with his meal, no wine. Bring down his dirty dishes from breakfast. If he needs something else, he'll ask for it, but don't speak to him first.”
I knew the answer already, but I wanted my guess confirmed before I actually risked showing my face to an angel. So I asked, “Won't he wonder why
I'm
bringing him dinner instead of you?”
She shook her head and eased herself back onto her pillows. There were a lot of them. The bed was surprisingly plush, given her situation and the severe plainness of the rest of the room. I liked the thought that she allowed herself a single indulgence. “No,” she said, “he's blind.”
I had to turn away to hide my smile. “I'll be back in a few moments,” I told her as I stepped into the kitchen again. I was so delighted with the way my plan had gone so far that I was almost humming as I fixed up a platter.
It turns out it's not easy to carry a heavy tray up two flights if the stairs are narrow and twisty and the only illumination is a small lamp you added to your tray at the last moment, when you realized the house was too old and remote to run on gaslight. I was a little breathless when I arrived at the attic level and found myself in a narrow corridor that ran along one side of the house. Three doors led off the hallway; the two that were closed I guessed to be a bedroom and a closet. The third one stood open in a rather gloomy invitation into what appeared to be a large sitting room. It seemed to take up most of the top story and to be intended as a public space, so I stepped inside with assumed confidence.
A quick look around showed me shadowy groupings of chairs and small tables, boarded-up windows, and a curving iron staircase that had to lead to the roof. In one corner, a large stringed instrument leaned against a wall. There appeared to be stacks of books and papers on the floor, though they were disordered, as if no one had touched them in a long time.
In the center of the room, not quite facing me, was the angel. He was sprawled in one of those special cutaway chairs designed to accommodate angel wings, though he sat in it so carelessly that he appeared to be in danger of slipping out and crashing to the floor. His head was flung back to rest on the top of the padded back; his wings puddled on either side of him like dirty garments he had cast off after a tiring day. It was hard to tell by lamplight, but the clothes he was actually wearing appeared soiled as well. His white shirt looked wrinkled and stained, and his dark trousers sported a visible rip all the way down one seam. He was barefoot.
His face was in profile to me so at first all I could tell about his features was that his chin was firm, his nose was straight, and his cheekbone sleekly planed. He must not have liked the feel of whiskers on his face, because he had shaved recently, but his dark hair was long and disordered, spilling over the back of the chair in tangled knots.
I stood for a long time, holding the tray, staring at him. It was rare to see an angelâone of the most haughty, disdainful, unlikable creatures in all of Samariaâhumbled and miserable. I wanted to enjoy the sight for as long as I could.
Then my hand trembled, or I shifted my weight and the floor creaked beneath me. At any rate, he suddenly realized I was there. He didn't lift his head, just turned it enough so that he appeared to be looking in my direction. It was too dark for me to discern what the trouble was with his eyes. From here they looked like pools of shadow fringed with sweeping lashes.
“The breakfast plates are on the table,” he said in an indifferent voice that was still musical enough to make me catch my breath. He didn't seem to realize or care that I had arrived after midnight with his evening meal. “You can leave dinner there if you like. I'm not hungry.”
I located the table he meant, but set my tray in a different spot because the breakfast dishes took up all the room. Then I regarded him again for a moment before I asked brightly, “So what exactly happened to
you
?”
Â
Â
T
he astonishment on the angel's face was comical. He jerked upright and glared in my direction, his wings quivering in indignation. “Who are you? Where's Alma?” he demanded.
I felt a grudging admiration that he knew the servant's name; so many in his position wouldn't. “She sprained her ankle and can barely make it around the house, let alone up the stairs,” I said, still in that cheerful voice. “I volunteered to help her out.”
“No one is supposed to enter this house without my approval,” he said, frowning heavily. “No one asked me if you could come here.”
“Well, the headmistress and the footman are gone, and Alma's laid up downstairs, so no one could really ask about your preferences,” I said. “As long as Alma's off her feet, you'll have to accept my helpâor feed yourselfâor starve.”