Are We Live? (18 page)

Shukur soon retaliated by insulting Alloush’s mother and throwing his pen and a cup of water at him. As the two guests sprung out of their seats, the show’s host was forced to intervene and stop them from physically coming to blows – although by that time, Shukur had picked up his chair, ready to throw it. Both parties refused to leave the show and, after ten minutes off air, they simply resumed the broadcast and the debate, which then passed off without incident.

Weathermen and -women are often seen as harmless televisual types, called upon to smile even when they're telling us it's going to rain all summer. But there is a surprisingly naughty streak in the ranks of meteorology. All these stories have left me wondering whether giggling, doing finger swears and having on-camera strops are not so much faults but requirements for the job.

Tomasz Schafernaker is a BBC weatherman come poster-boy, who has posed, in his pants, for a men's magazine (he's actually got an eight-pack). On top of that, he has committed at least three, priceless, live TV blunders.

Caught unaware when the camera came to the weather studio before he was ready, Tomasz simply stood there silently as the BBC weather ident blared behind him. Realizing he was on camera, Tomasz simply scowled and said, ‘I don't know if I'm on camera or not!' He then removed his microphone, unloosened his fetching pink tie, and walked off set. Weather Diva!

Reading the weather live on Radio 4's flagship
Today
programme, Tomasz was reporting from the often-boggy environs of the Glastonbury Festival. Ever the professional, Tomasz delivered a note-perfect bulletin. Well, at least until he reached the part about rain. According to the script, he was meant to describe how a forecast bad spell was likely to turn the festival into a ‘muddy site'. Alas, he used instead the rather unfortunate ‘muddy shite,' and then collapsed, giggling his way through the rest of the broadcast like a schoolboy.

An insight into the bantering atmosphere of the
BBC News studio was glimpsed when Tomasz was introduced by a (rather sarcastic) Simon McCoy. Newsreader McCoy began by saying, ‘Now we'll have the weather forecast in just a minute. Of course it will be 100 per cent accurate and provide you with all the details you could possibly want.' Cue Tomasz, who decided to gesture at McCoy with his middle finger, using the universal hand gesture for ‘jog on'. Despite trying to disguise the hand signal as a chin scratch, viewers were not fooled. Neither was fellow broadcaster Fiona Armstrong, who let out a thoroughly lady-like, ‘Oh!'

Whatever the weather, you'd be forgiven for expecting the forecast to be delivered with grace, poise and professionalism. Think again.

In February 2010, Steve Jacobs, a weatherman for Australia's Channel Nine, presented a weather bulletin from inside the pelican pen at Taronga Zoo. As Jacobs began his broadcast, one of the pelicans soon proved just how friendly he was, and Jacobs could be heard shouting, ‘AAAAAAARGH! My arse! My arse!' Jacobs was forced to abandon his bulletin as the pelican pecked at him affectionately.

This weathergirl on WVTM, in Alabama, USA, showed the news anchor who's boss.

Weathergirl:
  62 degrees tonight, and you'll notice the rain and storms arrive tomorrow, mainly during the afterno—

[Female news anchor takes wrong turn and strides in front of weather graphic.]