Back Road Chances (Roughneck #2) (3 page)

“I’m just happy to see you, I missed you.” There. I did it. I actually said what I was thinking. Fuck.

I felt her body tense up but she didn’t say anything, and she didn’t pull away from me. I wasn’t moving. I wasn’t taking it back, and I wasn’t apologizing.

Chapter 3

Sam

He missed me. I don’t think he had ever said that to me before. I mean, he always acted like it, but he never said those words. But he could change his mind about me anytime; decide he wanted to be with another woman, or lots of other women. I know sluts had to throw themselves at him all the time; he was too fucking sexy for it not to happen.  Fuck, why did I have to over think everything? Why couldn’t I be more like Lainey? She fell head over heels for Jase and didn’t think twice about it. She agreed to marry him after two months. Moon and I had been sleeping together for a year and I still couldn’t even wrap my head around my feelings.  Our sex life was beyond amazing, but for me it was more than that. I was just too scared to say it. I was too scared of him leaving me. I was too scared of getting hurt. And my fear caused me to get defensive and pretend I was a lot stronger than I actually was. Damn, I had issues.

“The food smells good too, you just smell better,” Moon whispered in my ear, as he squeezed my hips. He really was sweet to me, why couldn’t I just enjoy it? Enjoy him. I had to quit worrying so damn much. I turned around and gave him a kiss and wrapped my arms around his neck. I needed to chill the fuck out. Moon squeezed me tight and let out a sigh.

“Sit, I’ll make your plate,” I told him, as I dropped my arms and turned back around. He did so without hesitation.

“Do you have plans tonight?” Moon asked, as we sat down for breakfast.

“Um, no.” I said quietly.

“Don’t worry, I’m not asking you to stay the night, Sam,” he said, as he rubbed his hand over his stomach and slowly up his chest until his shirt was raised above his nipples. Damn, he was hot. Even when he was being cocky, he was hot. I couldn’t help but drink him in. I couldn’t even make a smart ass comment. I just stared.

“But seriously, Sam, I want to take you somewhere,” he said.

“Where?” I asked.

“I’m not telling you,” he said with a smile.

“How will I know what to wear?” I asked.

“I’ll tell you what not to wear,” he said with that devious smile. That smile that I couldn’t resist. I needed to be closer to him.

“And what’s that?” I said, as I stood up and walked over to him. I scooted his chair out and straddled him. I struggled with a lot of things when it came to Moon, but how much he turned me on was certainly not one of them.

“Panties,” he said, as he rubbed his hand between my legs.

“No panties?” I said in a voice that was huskier than I intended, as I rubbed into his hand.

“Fuck no, no panties,” he said, as he squeezed my ass and then kissed me hard.

“Breakfast later?” He said breathlessly when he pulled his mouth away from me.

“Hell yes,” I said, as Moon stood up and I wrapped my legs around his waist.

An hour later we were sprawled out on my bed, completely helpless. I had never experienced sex like this with anyone. Our passion was almost uncontrollable. We had a connection that I couldn’t even describe. I know it was definitely physical, but I couldn’t deny that my emotions played a huge part in it. Whether I liked it or not.

“You’re quiet,” Moon said, as he draped his arm across my bare stomach.

“You wore me out,” I said. God, he felt so good next to me.  It took everything I had to fight these feelings. Keeping my guard up was wearing me down.

“We have that effect on each other,” he said, and kissed my temple.

I started to move away and roll out of bed.

“Don’t,” he said, and he tightened his grip on me.

“I need to get dressed,” I said. This was the part that got uncomfortable. Afterwards. When I wanted to fall into his arms and enjoy the high we were coming down off of. But my brain would tell me to toughen up. My heart and my head were in two different places and it was fucking with me, bad. I was torn.

“No you don’t.” Moon said firmly. He usually just let me get up immediately. He didn’t fight me. He was different today. I wasn’t sure what to think about it.

“You don’t get to run away from me, Sam.”

“And you don’t get to boss me around unless we’re having sex, remember? I think we established this months ago,” I said in my typical smart ass tone. See what I mean, defensive.

Moon sat up and propped his arm behind his head and stared into my eyes.

“Well, maybe the rules are changing,” he said very matter of fact, and then kissed my nose. “And technically, we’re still naked and you know how I like to be in charge when you’re naked. It’s kind of a requirement.”

He had me there. I let out a huff and lay back down.

“Don’t be a baby,” Moon said quietly, as he snuggled against me.

“Did you just call me a baby?” I asked, and jerked my head in his direction.

“No,” he said with his eyes closed, looking completely peaceful. “I said don’t be a baby.” He chuckled, and kissed my cheek.

“Fucker.” I mumbled.

“Just did,” he said “And it was fucking awesome!”

I couldn’t help but laugh. God, I love you.
Son of a bitch! 
I looked over at Moon; I almost said that shit out loud.

As I was finishing up getting ready that night for Moon to pick me up, my phone rang.

“Daddy!” I said, with my voice full of excitement when I picked up the phone.

“Hey Angel,” he said. He sounded tired.

“You ok?” I asked, automatically worried.

“Yeah, just tired. It’s been a long day,” he said with a yawn.

“You need to make sure you’re getting enough rest,” I said. I always worried about him. It had been just the two of us since I was seven years old. That was when the bitch left. I hardly even remembered her anymore. But what kind of woman-and I use that term loosely- leaves her family and never looks back? That’s really fucked up. It really bothered me for a lot of years; especially when I started getting older and my body started changing. Trying to explain to your big old roughneck daddy that you needed to go to the store for pads when you just started your period wasn’t easy. That poor man was uncomfortable for years, but he took it like a champ. Luckily, Sara, Lainey’s mom, was always willing to help me. She answered questions I was too nervous to ask and explained things to me that I would have never asked my daddy about. She was a good woman.

“I am honey; just this job wears me out sometimes. Plus traveling down from the wedding and going straight to work took a toll on me. I ain’t getting no younger,” he said with a laugh. “But I’ve got Vickie here to baby me now.”

I really was glad that he had a girlfriend now. I often wondered if he would marry Vickie. I knew he loved her, but he never mentioned marriage. That bitch did a number on him, too. I hated her more for what she did to him, than what she did to me.

“Well good, she needs to baby you,” I said. “I’m so glad y’all got to come to the wedding. I know it meant a lot to Lainey.” Funny how my Daddy was a “y’all” now. They were a package deal.  Vickie had quit her waitressing job and followed Daddy from rig to rig now. She fought him tooth and nail at first because she was so used to taking care of herself. That’s when I knew she was good for him and wasn’t after his money. I liked her.

“Me too. I hated that we had to leave so quick but you know how the oilfield is. It don’t stop for nobody.”

“I know,” I said, trying to hide the sadness in my voice. I had a love-hate relationship with the oilfield. I loved that it provided stability to so many people around me. I hated that it took them away from me. I tried to just roll with it now, because I knew it’s just the way it was, but it still bothered me sometimes.

“So, whatcha got going on tonight?” He asked.

“Moon made plans, he won’t tell me what though,” I said.

“That boy’s got it bad,” he said through a laugh.

“What?” I asked.
No he didn’t. Did he?

“Angel, don’t you see the way he looks at you? That boy loves you,” he said.

“I don’t know about all that, Daddy,” I said. “We’re not that serious.”

“You keep telling yourself that,” he said. That was the exact same thing Moon said to me last night.

“Dad, I gotta finish getting ready. He’s gonna be here in a minute.” I wasn’t ready for this conversation. So I did what I do best, I avoided it.

“Alright, sweetie. But hey, listen. Take it from me; don’t walk away from something that’s good for you just because you’re scared.”

“I’m not scared of anything.” I lied.

“Angel, don’t forget who you’re talking to,” he said.

“Love you, daddy,” I said, trying to push the lump in my throat away. Are you fucking kidding me? What was wrong with me? I didn’t cry; I sure as hell wasn’t starting now.

“Love you too, sweetie. I’ll call you in a couple of days.”

“Ok bye,” I said, and ended the call before I lost my shit.

I put my phone down, walked to my bathroom and tried to get myself together. My dad was right. I was scared. I didn’t want to be. But I wanted to protect myself. I couldn’t handle going through what he did. He loved that bitch more than anything and she left. He was devastated. I was just a kid, but I wasn’t stupid. I knew he was hurt. And his pain lasted for years, even though he tried to hide it. I couldn’t do that. I wasn’t as strong as he was. It took him fifteen years to move on after what she did, it would take me a lifetime. But the truth was I would already be hurt if he left me. I was attached to Moon, whether I wanted to admit it or not. The thought of him walking away almost made me sick.

I was touching up my make up when I heard a knock at the door. I waited to hear it open but it didn’t. Moon always just came right in, it was what we did. I stopped and listened for footsteps. Nothing. Then another knock. So I walked to the front door and opened it.

“What are you doing, you never kn…” I was frozen. He was beautiful standing there.

He had on his boots and fitted jeans, which of course I loved. Then a white v-neck fitted t-shirt that showcased that amazing body of his. You could see his huge tattoo peeking through the neck of his shirt and out of the sleeve. He had worked on that piece for months. It was a tribal design that covered his left peck and went over his shoulder down to his bicep. It was perfect, just like Moon. As my eyes scanned those sexy ass arms of his, I saw it. He was holding a single white rose in his hand. He had that perfect cocky little smile on his face and gave me a wink, with those icy blue eyes that made my knees weak.  Fuck, I might as well go ahead and pick up twenty fucking cats. Because when this ended, I would be done. No one could compare to him, so I was destined to become the old cat lady. Seriously. But right this minute, I would accept that fate, because all I wanted to do was kiss him.

I didn’t even finish my sentence; I just wrapped my arms around him and put my lips to his. It took a second but Moon did the same and squeezed me tight.

Chapter 4

Moon

“Damn,” I said when she pulled her lips away from me. “I’m gonna knock more often.”

“Come in,” she said, as she grabbed me by the hand and led me inside. It was times like this when she fucked with my head the most. When she was affectionate without being naked. She fucking almost gave me whiplash sometimes. But I didn’t care; I loved her too much to care.

“For you ma’am,” I said, as I handed her the rose I just picked up from the flower shop.

“Thank you,” she said quietly, and took the flower out of my hand. She put it to her nose as she walked over to the bar and stuck it in the vase with the first one. So far so good. Maybe the old man was right. But I wasn’t getting too excited. I just never knew with Sam, she could flip the switch in a second and shut me out. My dad always told me to never try and figure women out, because it wouldn’t work. He wasn’t kidding; Sam was a complete mind fuck sometimes.

“You ready to go woman?” I said, as I stood beside her and squeezed her ass.

“Yeah, let me grab my purse,” she said, and walked into the living room.

“You’re suitcase, you mean,” I said. That thing was huge; I don’t know what she could possibly keep in it.

“It’s not that big,” she said with a little laugh, as she slung it over her arm. She was so tiny; I’m surprised it didn’t knock her sideways when she carried it.

“Ok,” I said with a laugh, as I opened the front door and waved my arm for her to go ahead of me.

When we got in the truck, Sam started to buckle her seatbelt. I patted the middle and nodded my head. She scooted over close to me without hesitation. Yes, this is what I fucking wanted. I was just hoping it lasted, for tonight anyways. I had my left hand on the steering wheel and my right on my knee when Sam did something that really shocked me. She reached over, grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers. For some people, that might not be a big thing. For us, this was huge. She rarely held my hand and she sure as hell never initiated it. What the fuck? I squeezed her hand and she did the same. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it, but it was. For us, it was. Shit, she was definitely turning me into a fucking pansy. I’m getting excited because she was holding my hand. What was I, a fucking thirteen year old girl? But I couldn’t help it. I raised our hands and put my lips to hers. She tensed up for just a second but then I felt her relax. She had to see how much I loved her. How much I needed her to love me back.

“Wait a minute,” Sam said, as she took in her surroundings. “Are we going to The Patch?” She asked.

“Maybe.” I said.

“Do you think people go out there anymore?”

“I don’t know, but it’s Sunday night so I’m sure no one will be there.” The truth is I had gone out there more than once and just sat.  Sometimes there were empty beer cans lying around, so I’m sure kids still went out there. But every time I had driven there, it was empty. Granted it was never on the weekend, but I was pretty sure it was a safe bet we would be alone. This field had a lot of memories. It was where I realized I loved her. And maybe it was just high school love back then, I don’t know. And it definitely got more intense as the years went by, but this place is where it really started.

“Wow, I haven’t seen this place in years,” Sam said, as I parked my truck. I watched her eyes scan our surroundings. She had a smile that made my stomach do flips. To anyone else, this place was just a field. It was just a few acres of trees that sloped down to a little creek. But for us, it was full of memories.

“Come on,” I said, as I opened the driver’s side door and hopped out. Sam followed right behind me.  She watched as I walked to the bed of the truck and opened the tailgate. I jumped in the back and unfolded the blanket I had tucked behind the cooler. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye and could see her wheels turning. Fear crept up on me; I knew what she was thinking. This is what couples do. But I had my keys and we were out in the middle of nowhere. She wasn’t running from me, not this time. I was tired of her running every time she thought we were moving forward. I don’t know why she was so scared to actually be in a real relationship with me, but she was going to have to get over that shit. I was done letting her make all the decisions when it came to us. I was done letting her avoid what we were. This shit had gone on long enough.

“What are you doing?” Sam asked suspiciously.

“I’m unfolding a blanket,” I said, knowing that’s not what she meant. “Come on,” I said as I held out my hand to help her up. She stared at me for a few seconds and then put her hand in mine. When we were both standing in the bed of the truck, I sat down on the blanket and patted the spot next to me.

“Sit.” I said.

Sam sat beside me, but was still eying me with suspicion.

“Damn girl. You can quit staring daggers through me at any time.” I said with a laugh. Sam blinked a couple of times and then the wrinkle in her forehead relaxed a little. But she was still thinking.

“Out with it.” I said. I was ready for whatever she had to say. That’s not true. But I was ready to argue with whatever she had to say.

“Why are you doing this?” She asked.

Because I fucking love you.

“What? It’s a nice night. I like it out here. Relax,” I said, as I opened the cooler and pulled two beers out. I opened one and handed it to her. When she took it out of my hand, I opened my own and took a long swig.

“Moon, you know what I mean,” she said, and then took a drink of her beer.

“Because I want to talk to you.  You can’t fucking run from me out here. It’s a long walk back home, darlin.”

“You’re an asshole!” She said with half a smile, I’m not sure she was joking.

“Listen, this thing we’ve been doing has been so fucking good, Sam. But I can’t do it anymore.”

“What?” She said. Her voice sounded pissed but her eyes were full of hurt. Shit, I realized how it sounded. How is it that I’ve gone over this speech a million times in my head and I still manage to fuck it up right out of the gate?

“That’s not what I meant,” I said with a little laugh. Not because it was funny, but because I was nervous as shit and I was fucking it up by the second.

“Just fucking say it Moon, don’t beat around the bush!” Sam snapped. Maybe her eyes were wrong; maybe she was just plain pissed.

“Sam, calm down and just listen to me,” I said, still smiling. But she wasn’t. Not even a little. She had her eyes fixed on the trees, she was shutting down. Fuck that. She was going to hear me out, whether she liked it or not.

“Look at me.” I said firmly. She didn’t.

“Look. At. Me.” I repeated. She glared into my eyes. I put my beer down as I exhaled, and then scooted as close to her as I could get. I put my hands on both sides of her face and stroked her cheeks with my thumbs. I gave her a gentle kiss that she didn’t reciprocate. So I did it again. Gently. Waiting for her to respond. She didn’t.

“You’re so fucking stubborn,” I said quietly, and kissed her again. Her lips responded, slightly. So I kissed her again. She responded this time. But I could feel her trembling. I kissed her once more and pulled away. I took her beer out of her hands and set it to the side. I grabbed her hands and squeezed them.

“That came out wrong. If you would let me explain myself before you get all pissed.” She didn’t respond; she was just staring at our hands.

“I need you to look at me,” I said, and waited until she did. The look on her face said it all. She was worried and she was hurt. Does it make me a complete asshole to admit that made me a little happy? I didn’t want her hurting, but at least it showed that she cared about what happened with us. She wanted this as much as I did, she just didn’t want to admit it.

“What I can’t do anymore is just pretend we’re fuck buddies. You know it as much as I do that it’s more than that.”

“But…” Sam tried to interrupt me.

“Sshh,” I said, and put my index finger over her lips. “I need to say this.”

“You’re always so hot and cold with me. When I asked you to start dating, you ran. But you came back. We spent the holidays together but you shut me out right after. I don’t understand it. But I’ve always just dealt with it. Because I didn’t want to mess up what we had. I didn’t want to lose you, even if all I got was sex. Don’t get me wrong, sex with you blows my fucking mind, but I want more. When this first started, that was enough, but it’s not anymore.”

“What if I tell you I can’t give you more?” She said, but I knew she didn’t mean it; she didn’t want to mean it.

“I’d tell you that you were lying to both of us,” I said, as I brushed my lips across hers.

She didn’t say a word; she just shook her head yes as she grabbed my shirt and pulled me on top of her.  It wasn’t the response I was hoping for, but I wasn’t going to push her too hard. I put my feelings out there, some of them at least. I knew I would have to tell her everything soon, but for tonight this was enough.  She didn’t take off running through the woods, so I had to be thankful for that. And she felt so good underneath me, I just wanted her closer.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” I said, as I looked into her eyes. She didn’t respond with words. She started kissing my neck and my dick immediately got hard. I gently grabbed a fist full of her hair and bit her ear lobe. The sweet little sound that came out of her mouth flipped my switch. I needed her. Now. My fingers went straight to Sam’s zipper and I gave it a quick tug. I immediately felt the heat coming off that perfect pussy. My pussy. All mine.

“No panties. Good girl.” I whispered in her ear, as I started to pull her jeans down.