Be Careful What You Wish For (6 page)

Chapter Eight

I SAT AT the little wooden table in the hotel room, gazing at all the food.  I was thinking,
Damn, this guy must be loaded.
  After we’d made love, Kage had found the room service menu and, it looked like now, had ordered one of everything.  He’d asked what I wanted and I told him pancakes sounded great.  With that, though, we had a pot of coffee and he had lots of food.  As I poured syrup over my cakes, I said, “So, when’s everyone else arriving?”

His brows pulled together.  “What do you mean?”

“That’s an awful lot of food for just you.”

His grin was wide as he stabbed a slice of ham before dragging a knife through it.  “I’m happy to share, but I need my energy.  I had a lot more exercise last night than I’d planned.  Pool doesn’t usually take it out of me.”  I smiled.  “Help yourself to anything else.”

The two giant pancakes on my plate stared back at me.  “Thanks, but I think I’ll have a time just taking care of these.”

There was a twinkle in his eye when he said, “Need me to help you out?”

“You can finish what I can’t.”

“That’s not what I meant.”

It took me a second before I realized that he was offering to give me another
workout
.  I giggled.  I needed to rest a little.  And, damn, it was a lot of food.  Eggs, bacon, ham, biscuits and gravy.  Well, maybe not so much for a guy like Kage.  For me, though, I couldn’t imagine.  The coffee was exactly what I’d needed, and it went down like chocolate.  “So what do you do for a living?”  I had to know.  I didn’t want Kage for his money.  That was the farthest thing from my mind, but he didn’t seem to care about how much he spent.  His truck seemed pretty new, but on top of that, we were in a nice hotel and he had no concern with how much he spent on overpriced room service.  On top of that, his wife had offered me five hundred dollars.  It made me curious.

He shrugged.  “Nothing exciting, believe me.  I work at the mill.”

“The steel mill?”  He nodded.  Maybe not exciting, but Pueblo, Colorado, was known for the steel mill that had been the backbone of the city since the 1800s.  It was even called “Steel City” by the locals.  It had been one of the town’s main industries back in the day and was still one of its larger employers…and, it turned out, also employed this guy who had my eye and had captured my heart.

“Yeah.”

“But you said you’d rather play in your band full-time?”

He swallowed the piece of bacon he’d been chewing. 
“Hell, yeah.”

“I’d love to watch you play sometime.”

He grinned again.  Oh, so endearing.  “I’d like that.”  He picked up his coffee.  “I’ll have to see what shows we have coming up soon.”

Yeah…like my loins could handle this hot guy up on a stage. 
Holy hell.  I’d probably come just watching him.  I thought about saying that, but I was feeling a little more subdued that morning.  “What’s your name?”  He started laughing.  “I mean your band name.”

He was still chuckling when he answered. 
“Pretty Little Lies.”

I took a bite of my pancakes, considering it.  It was a cool name, different, and I wondered if I knew why he’d chosen that name.  Maybe he wasn’t the only one who
had a say in the name, though.  Maybe he and all his bandmates had been in on it.  “That’s cool.”  I cut off another bite-sized wedge out of my cakes.  “So when do you guys practice?”

“Saturday afternoons and sometimes Tuesday nights if we feel up for it.
  We only play once a month or so, so we don’t need a whole lot of practice.  And we haven’t written anything new in months, so it’s not like we need to get together a lot.”

No…but if he really, truly wanted his band to be his full-time job, I thought, he’d need to spend more time doing it.  I didn’t know this man in and out, though, even if my soul
was sure it knew his, and I wasn’t going to presume to know what he had and hadn’t done or what had led up to those decisions.  That made me realize that there was so much about him I didn’t know.  Hell, I’d known the guy for less than a day.  We had a lot to learn about each other.

We ate in silence for a while and as I approached the halfway mark on the pancakes, I knew I wouldn’t be able to finish them, but when he offered me a slice of bacon, I couldn’t resist.  God, those eyes…I
could get lost in them.  He asked, “You said you don’t have class today, but is there anywhere else you need to be?”

Well…I supposed we’d need to discuss our future sometime, and that future involved his wife.  His question made me realize that we had to assess ourselves
(and the two of us together) in the broad light of day.  “Uh, yeah, actually.  I need to text your wife later and meet her.”

He scowled and I saw his shoulders drop some. 
“I’d like to be there for that.”

I took a deep breath.  No matter how I felt about
Kage or his wife, I did
not
want to be in the middle of that or even anywhere near the fringe.  “Uh…”

“No, trust me.  It’s…”  He took a sip of coffee.  “What were you going to meet her for?”

It sounded so sordid—and it was, really.  “I’m supposed to provide, uh,
evidence
of our encounter.”

He nearly spat the coffee out of his mouth. 
“Evidence?”

“Pictures.”

He set his cup down on the table and looked me square in the eye.  I could almost see the gears turning.  He said, “Don’t you think we should give my wife what she’s paid for?”

* * *

As per Fay’s instructions, I walked into Starbucks to meet her.  I was tired, not just physically but emotionally.  I had the photographic evidence she’d asked for…and then some.

She was sitting in the back, and I didn’t want any coffee, so I walked straight back
to where she was seated, near the restrooms.  When I sat across from her, she said, “God, you look like hell.”

I wanted to tell her it wa
s because her husband was crazy in bed (which was an understatement but was probably something she already knew), yet I thought better of it.  She had some hard enough news to swallow.  I didn’t need to be a bitch about it and make it worse.  As I settled in, I said, “Well, let’s just say I had a busy night.”

She had a wicked smile on her face, and I realized she was going to enjoy catching her husband.  When I thought about the weird mixed emotions I’d felt for
Kage, I knew that if he had been my man, I wouldn’t have been happy at all to find out he was having sex with another woman.  I would have been devastated and probably angry, definitely weepy and heartsick.  But she looked like a cop who enjoyed catching speeders.  Strange.  “Do tell.”

I sighed and dug my phone out of my purse.  I said, “Be careful what you wish for.”  I pulled up the pictures and slid the phone over.  There wasn’t much evidence, and she went through them quickly.  I had taken some pictures of him lying in bed
“sleeping” with his clothes off (although his private parts were covered).  There were no pictures of the two of us actually having sex and I would never have dreamed of taking photos like that, although I wouldn’t have been surprised if she’d demanded them.

She
slid my phone back to me.  “Mmm-hmm.  Just as I’d suspected.  That dirty bastard.”  She took a sip of her coffee and then said, “He never even called me with an excuse as to why he wasn’t home.  If I hadn’t known what was going on, I probably would have reported him missing.”  She tapped her manicured nail on the table.  “So…having spent a night with him, were you able to figure out how often he does this?  Were you just par for the course?”

Well…the fact that she hadn’t heard from him—for the first time
ever
—should have been her first clue.  But she didn’t get it.  I was so tired and full of turmoil for my own self that it was hard for me to whip up any sense of empathy for this heartless woman.  “I think last night was the first—and
only
—time he’ll ever cheat on you.”

“Oh, bullshit.”
  She realized she’d said it a little too firmly, calling attention to herself, and lowered her voice again.  “I’m not
that
stupid.”

That was when I saw
Kage come in the door.  My heart started thudding at the sight of him in broad daylight.  Fay didn’t see him from her angle, and she’d planned it that way.  She hadn’t wanted to be spotted in the coffee shop by passersby.  But Kage couldn’t miss me or his wife’s perfectly coifed platinum hair.  “Believe what you like.” 

Gorgeous
Kage grabbed a chair and slid it up to the table where his wife and I sat.  He sat on it backwards, leaning his upper body against the back.  He threw several papers on the table.  “I want a divorce.”

Fay’s face turned white.  “What?”

“You heard me.”

“
You
want a divorce?  You were the one cheating on
me
!”

He shook his head.  “Last night made me realize a lot of things.”

“You can’t divorce me.”

He smiled. 
“Those papers there?  Just the beginning.”  He looked over at me then.  “I really should thank you, Fay.  Jessica and I wouldn’t have met each other if you hadn’t sent her my way.”

“What do you mean?”

He looked at me again, the man who was my soulmate, the guy I knew I needed to spend eternity with.  “I mean I’m leaving you—with or without a divorce.  Yeah, last night I cheated on you, but you threw this girl into my arms, and it made me see how empty I am when I’m with you.”

I smiled at him and then looked at Fay.  “Keep your money.”  I considered telling her
sorry
, but I wasn’t.

Her jaw slackened.  She wasn’t upset she was losing her husband.  No…I got from her the sense that she felt she’d been bested, and that pissed her off.  Still, she said nothing, and I’ll give her credit for that.

Kage looked at me.  “Ready?”

I smiled. 
“Yeah.”  He stood and held out his hand.  I took it and walked out of the coffee shop with him.  I had yet to figure out how I’d deal with my car and where my relationship with Kage would go, but for the first time in a long time, I felt something almost foreign to me:  hope.

Chapter Nine

KAGE DROVE ME to my apartment after we left the coffee shop and kissed me goodbye but didn’t come in.  He said he couldn’t be tempted, because he wouldn’t be able to leave.  He had to get his stuff out of his house and quick, he said, because Fay was spiteful, and he wouldn’t be surprised to arrive at his house to find a pile of his things in the middle of the yard, soaked with lighter fluid and burning to ashes.

He kissed me
one last time and promised to see me that night.  I had to work, though, so he said he’d call later and we could make plans.

So that afternoon, I tried to read some of my text
books and just couldn’t get into the work.  Instead, I remembered my morning together with Kage.  We’d taken pictures (the “proof” that Fay had asked for—Kage lay in bed, covered with the sheet up to his waist, pretending to sleep), wound up in bed one last time, and then he took me home so I could change clothes and clean up more.  He went to visit his lawyer (or
a
lawyer—I wasn’t clear about that), and then he picked me up and took me to Starbucks.

I hadn’t expected him to come in
to the coffee shop.  I’d thought he was going to sit in his truck the whole time and present the papers to Fay later.  That had been quite a twist but probably one Fay had coming to her.

We hadn’
t discussed my dying car and definitely not the fact that I was now four hundred short of a repair and would no longer feel good about exchanging sex for car favors.  In just that short time, I’d felt an iron clad bond form between Kage and me, and it wouldn’t have felt right.

That didn’t change the fact that, as far as transportation went, I was fucked.  I supposed, if I needed to, I could get the money back from
Carl, but what good would that do me?  It wasn’t like I’d be able to use it to buy a different car.  Nope—it was a drop in the bucket and not helpful without the other half.

Kage
and I hadn’t discussed that.  I had mentioned it in passing the night before, when I was confessing my dirty deed, but I hadn’t told him that I still had a dilemma…and I still had to find a way to get to work that night.  Actually, that wasn’t true.  Getting to work wasn’t the problem.  I could take the bus to get there.  Getting home, though—that was an issue.  The buses didn’t run that late at night.

I took a deep breath. 
Kage had said he’d call me later so we could hook up.  That meant he could pick me up at the bar.  Problem solved.

In the meantime, though, I’d need to come up with a more permanent solution.  I didn’t want to have to rely on him to be my ride.  I really was back at square one as far as transportation problems went.  I just happened to have a…
well, he wasn’t exactly a boyfriend yet.

No, my life was complicated and was a bigger pain in the ass now than it had been twenty-four hours earlier.  But I was a survivor.  I’d figure it out.
  Maybe I’d see if he had any ideas, and if he didn’t, I’d ask my roomies.  If I had to, I’d get a job closer to my apartment and walk or ride a bike.  Four hundred would easily cover the cost of a bike.  And, as far as my family went, they could come to me or come get me if they wanted to see me.  They’d just have to understand.

My guilty feelings had dissipated, especially since
Kage served her with divorce papers.  It made me feel like, even though we’d done something wrong, that was his way of making it right.  And, as I’d tried to keep reminding myself, it had been what Fay had asked for in the first place.  She had
wanted
to catch him cheating.  Who knows how long the two of them might have stayed together had she not forced me on him?  Or would she have put someone else up to the task?  And what if…?

But I had to stop thinking that way.  My feelings the night before had been so strong for that man, not just bordering on love but something more, something eerily transcendent, otherworldly,
even spiritual.  Now, though, with him out of my reach, I started to doubt those feelings.  What if that had just been a response to the emotional state I’d already been in?  What if it had been my brain finding a way to justify it so I’d see the act through to the end?

I shook my head.  I couldn’t think that way.

Yet those thoughts swirled around my mind for hours until, at last, I saw that it was time to get ready for work.

It was Friday night, which meant I’d have to show a little leg.  During the week, I usually wore jeans and no one seemed to care, but to make really good tips on Friday, I often wore short skirts.  Yeah, sometimes it meant my ass would get grabbed too, but as long as I got a good tip, I could tolerate it.

Two hours into my shift, I still hadn’t heard from Kage, and I started to wonder if he was getting cold feet.  What if he, too, had started doubting what we’d felt?  What if he was feeling like a total shithead asshole?  Sure, I’d been the temptress, the seductress hell bent on bringing him down, but he’d been the one to cheat on his spouse.  He might be overwhelmed with feelings of remorse and shame.  Honestly, I didn’t know him well enough to know how he responded to that kind of event, so how would I know?  And, for all I knew, he was just an asshole who never called, never did what he promised.

What the hell was wrong with me?  Again…I’d barely known the man twenty-four hours, had been smitten with him, ready to have his babies and pledge my eternal love, and now I was presuming all manner of horrible things about him.  I wasn’t being fair at all.

But love doesn’t always keep a level head.

Instead o
f jumping to conclusions, I decided to send him a text around eight o’clock.  I still had plenty of time on my shift, but I hadn’t seen him nor heard from him since early afternoon and I just wanted to see if I should expect him.

Only I agonized over
how to compose that stupid text.  I didn’t want to sound possessive or jealous or even worried (although I was).  I didn’t want to seem controlling.  I was afraid of sounding like Fay and driving him off, and I definitely didn’t want to piss this relationship away before it even had a chance to start.  So I stuck my phone back in my bra and served more drinks while I tried to consider what to say.  It was another half hour before I wrote a text that said,
Hey, gorgeous.  Just wondered when you’d be by to pick me up so I can rock your world again.
  And as soon as I touched
Send
, I questioned it.  What if it sounded too flippant, too trashy?  I was going to push him away.

I started feeling angry with myself and tried to focus on the job.  It was busy and crowded that night, so it was easy to give it my all.  Still, in the back of my mind, I was worrying about
Kage.  It was another fifteen minutes before I felt my phone vibrate against my breast.

I was so afraid to read it, so I spent the next ten minutes taking more orders and delivering drinks to customers in the crowded, noisy bar, but when I’d worked up the courage, I ran to
the storeroom and pulled the phone out of my bra.

I was being so stupid.  I knew why I was starting to feel insecure…because, in the back of my mind, I was worried that
Kage had gone home and started packing, and he and Fay had spent the afternoon discussing what had happened and had decided to give the marriage another go.  My act had pushed them together.  I considered it.  If that
had
happened, if this wonderful guy and his wife had decided to work through their problems (a definite possibility), I would have to accept it and move on.  I wouldn’t be happy, but really he was never mine.  I supposed it would be better to find out now rather than later.

If that were the case, I would ask for the other four hundred.

Or maybe I wouldn’t.  It lacked class, but I didn’t care.  I still had a car that needed repair, and I would wind up with a heart in the same shape.

J, I’m with my
bandmates right now and we are drunk.  Will it be okay if I don’t see you till tomorrow?

I didn’t realize until I saw that text how tense I had been.  My heart was thudding in my chest
as though it was a thrash drummer driving a song with a double bass beat.  I took a slow deep breath, trying to get a hold on myself.  It was okay.  He wasn’t cheating with his wife.

At least I could make myself laugh.  Humor can be found in almost any situation, I thought.

Seeing that text, I could imagine how his day had gone.  He had gone home to pack up his things, as planned, and Fay had been there acting psycho, as anticipated.  Who knew how long, drawn out, and uncomfortable his afternoon had been.  He might have had to deal with her yelling and screaming, hitting, and who knew what else.  For all I knew, he’d had to call law enforcement just to get his belongings.  Then I could see someone like Fay begging him to stay, telling him she was sorry but that she loved him so much.  She would tell him she loved him so much and she couldn’t bear the thought of sharing him with anyone else, and it had filled her with rage and jealousy, but that was only because she loved him.  He would have had to wade through all her anger and manipulation.  It would have been exhausting.  And, if he was still feeling guilty, he might have just wanted to hang with his friends and get drunk.  Enough woman drama for the day.

I continued to have an uneasy feeling, but I had to find a way to get past that and trust him.  We
’d bonded hardcore the night before and we’d felt an insane, almost impossible connection, but it was there.  I was sure of it.

I had to trust him, had to trust his intentions.

Sure, that’s fine.  Can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

I wasn’t going to be demanding and ask when.  I wasn’t going to insist he share every free moment with me.  I wasn’t going to make any stipulations at all.  No, I was going to let him sift through the remnants of his old life and let him come to me on his own when he was ready.

If he didn’t, I’d know then that I had been just a one-night stand, a catalyst for, perhaps, what had to happen for him.  And I couldn’t hold that against him if that were the case.  I didn’t believe he would hurt me intentionally.  He didn’t seem the type.

Unless the guy was a hell of an actor.
  If he was, I’d find it out soon enough.