Beyond 4/20 (37 page)

Tuck dialed Irene, who answered immediately. “So, I have a plane, huh?”

“You certainly do.”

Irene grinned. Tuck reminded her of Chelsea in those early days, particularly when she called to ask what to wear to a gallery opening.

“How do I go about getting it here so I can take my wife somewhere?”

“You don’t. I do.”

Tuck thought about that. She really would be his right hand. That might take some getting used to.

“Any ideas where I might take her?”

“Warm or cold?”

“I don’t care. As long as it’s not somewhere he’s taken her.”

Irene felt sorry for Tuck. John was indeed a hard act to follow. “I’ll come up with something.”

“I think it needs to be pretty spectacular. We never really had a honeymoon.”

“From what I hear, it was the honeymoon any girl would dream of.”

Chuckling, he agreed, “Yeah, complete with port-o-potty. How about something a little classier?” He thought about it a minute and added, “I want to make her feel like a princess, so that spectacular.”

“I can do that.”

He thought for a second before admitting, “I’m not exactly cultured. I don’t want to go somewhere where I’ll feel like an idiot. I only speak English.”

Irene was again reminded of Chelsea. Tuck and Chelsea were so much alike, meant for each other even. Irene sighed, missing John. This was what he knew was best for Chelsea, and Irene agreed completely, but still, knowing how John loved Chelsea, there was something that made her a little sad as she set out to impress Chelsea for Tuck. No matter her deepest feelings, though, she would do everything in her power to help Tuck. She would make certain he and Chelsea had the honeymoon they deserved.

“Tuck, I’ll make sure it’s a place where you feel comfortable, both of you. What matters most, adventure or alone time?”

He scratched his head. “I don’t know, maybe a little of both.”

“I’ve already got ideas. I’ll let you know.”

“So really, I pay you enough to do all this?”

“The amount is obscene.”

“Good. You seem to deserve it and maybe some flowers too.”

“Sounds good to me. What kind shall I send me?”

“Do you like orchids?” They were his mother’s favorites.

“Love them.”

“Go all out.”

This conversation sealed the deal. He really did like this Irene.

“One final thing, I need to change banks. I’ll switch to where Chelsea banks.”

“I’ll handle that today. Anything else?”

“No. Just thanks.”

“You’re very welcome. I’m here whenever you need me.”

“Oh, I have a feeling I’ll need you. We need all kinds of stuff for the new house. Willing to come out for a while?”

“More than willing. Actually, I’ve considered moving out there.”

With all he had in mind for the future, that didn’t sound like a bad idea, so he admitted, “Sounds good to me.” Then added, “Know anything about homeschooling?”

“Not a thing, but I will by tomorrow.”

“You are worth an obscene amount of money.”

“I know.”

Irene was already making travel arrangements while they spoke. First order of business was to trade in his plane. There was no way in the world she would put Chelsea and Tuck on John’s plane. They needed a brand new start, and she would see to it that they got it.

When Tuck arrived home, the girls acted as if he had been gone all day. There was something new in the air, this sense of excitement as if even the girls knew all was new. Since things had taken such an ugly turn between Chelsea and him, the girls had seemed a bit unsettled. Of course they noticed the strain early on, and even when things appeared better, they still knew something wasn’t right, especially Lucy. She asked him on several occasions what was wrong with him, but he denied that anything was. He would never tell a living soul what he had overheard Chelsea say, for the most part because he believed her when she said it was out of context with their daily life. It was obvious that she loved him; no one could pretend to love as deeply as she demonstrated toward him. No matter what, though, it served as a reminder that deep down, further down than she even knew, she still belonged to John. It was more than still loving her first husband or the father of her child; that made perfect sense. Instead, it was that sense of her
belonging to
another that tore him apart. The bond of being John’s was not yet fully broken.

The afternoon spent together as a family was filled with laughter and happiness, something all too rare over the past months. They rode out to the new house site together and dreamed big. No matter what the girls asked for, Tuck agreed to it. It was okay; he finally had the money to do for his family, and he didn’t see a thing in the world wrong with that, if for no other reason than he had even bigger plans of how he might help others. Free to do both, be extravagant at home and in giving to others, Tuck was quite certain God planned it this way all along. After all the months of stress, not knowing how he was going to take care of his family, he realized that God had it covered all along. Pride nearly did come before a fall. The implications of losing the farm were staggering. He had never considered in his entire life living anywhere else. That day, standing on his soon-to-be front porch, he could look out over the expanse of acreage and be thankful that God had intervened, and that He truly did give grace once Tuck humbled himself. Come to find out, that was all that was ever required.

What struck him most that day, standing in that very place, was the fact that the altar at which he had once bowed down
before
God had become the idol he most recently bowed down
to
. For so many years he had considered that place his altar and sought God there, working through some of life’s greatest challenges. Once he actually began to build on that very site, it consumed his life, not just in the physical work, but mostly in his insistence that
he
build the house for Chelsea. That goal had overtaken him, and the house drove him internally in an unbalanced way, the motivating factor always being the ability to give Chelsea something John couldn’t top. After he let go of that, God provided the way, ironically through John. Humbling for sure, but the outcome would be that Chelsea would have her granny’s house, and thankfully, God would allow it to be through Tuck’s heart and hands, even if by John’s money. He smiled at that last thought. Technically, it was no longer John’s money, it was his. Strange things the Lord had brought about.

Chelsea dragged Tuck from the porch, and they walked hand in hand through the new house. Finally, the dream of their new home was back on track. It would be their place to begin anew, a place where they could create their own memories and leave all the others where they belonged, locked away in a closet. There were not many feelings as good as a fresh start, and that’s what she felt they had been given, a fresh start.

She was relieved and just as excited as the girls were as they made plans. As much fun as they were having dreaming over their new house, eventually Chelsea began putting the breaks on a few outlandish ideas, though. Sara Beth’s idea of a petting zoo in the back yard was the first she vetoed. One she embraced fully was Lucy’s idea for Sara Beth’s over-the-top cowgirl bedroom. When Lucy suggested it, Chelsea looked at Lucy with such a tender expression on her face. They both remembered the excitement of having a bedroom filled with your favorite things. Chelsea winked and smiled at Lucy, and Lucy winked in return. John had a great idea that they would borrow for his daughter.

After he talked with Irene about travel, Tuck had called Chelsea’s mom to see if she would be willing to keep the girls for a few days, maybe even a week. They had never had more than that one night alone, and he figured it was high time. Irene hadn’t let him know where they were going yet, so he couldn’t tell Gail, but he promised to keep her posted. Since he was bringing some guys in, he wasn’t worried about the farm. As a matter of fact, he wasn’t worried about anything. He had so many ideas swirling around in his head about how he could keep things running and be involved without having to actually be the one to put in the crazy hours the farm required. For the first time since he had come home from college, he had the ability to do more than tend his own sheep. It was the second part of his life’s dream coming true, the first of course being Chelsea.

Pulling Chelsea aside, Tuck whispered, “I want to get a way for a while. How does that sound to you?”

Chelsea smiled, grateful to see such peace in Tuck’s eyes. She honestly couldn’t recall the last time she had.

“I would love that. Where would you like to go?”

“I don’t know. Irene hasn’t told me yet.”

She chuckled, knowing exactly what he meant. Irene could easily take over before you even knew what happened.

“Wherever is fine with me.” She rested her head on Tuck’s chest. “Thank you for loving me still.”

Wrapping his arms around her, he squeezed hard. “I’ll always love you. Nothing will ever change that.” Lifting her head to look at him, he asked, “You know that, right?”

“I know, but lately, I sure haven’t felt as if I deserve it.”

He sighed. “I hope I’ve never made you feel that way.”

The thought of that caused an ache deep in his heart. The past months, between his jealousy over John and failure with the house, he had been much less of a husband than he would have imagined himself to be. The majority of their months together married were overshadowed and undervalued. “I am so grateful for you, for every moment with you. I know I haven’t acted much like it, but I am. I’ll show you going forward. I’ll get better at this.”

Chelsea had a sudden thought. “What about school? I thought you wanted to begin now.”

“We’ll work that out. It’s just a few days, so including the weekend, it’ll be even less. We’ll ask Caitlin and Macy to help.”

Tuck moved his lips to her ear. “This, us, is the priority right now. For as long as I live, you’ll never have to wonder if we’re okay. You’ll see.”

Chapter 21

S
taring at her computer screen, reviewing the details, Irene’s plan for Tuck and Chelsea was about as adventurous and romantic as it got, more so than any trip she had ever scheduled for John and Chelsea. She was pleased with herself and hoped Tuck would be pleased as well. It was what he said about making Chelsea feel like a princess that sparked the idea.

They would be staying in a castle in the south of France. Who knew you could rent an entire castle? Apparently with enough money, you could do most anything. They would be the only guests yet have dozens of servants to cater to their every whim. There was swimming, horseback riding, expansive gardens to explore, and supposedly some of the finest cuisine. Irene hesitated. It was doubtful Tuck would think too much of French cuisine, so she decided to rethink that one. She would simply bring in an American chef so that Tuck could order something much more familiar to him. They would have their pick of foods without the risk of being left hungry.

Irene considered what Tuck said about not wanting to feel like an idiot, so she ensured that the staff there spoke English. In case they wanted to drive in to the city, she arranged transportation and a translator. All in all, she thought such a trip was about as spectacular and as princess-like of a getaway as one could find. Honestly, she wondered how she might top such a thing in the future. There was nowhere to go but down from there.

Immediately, upon arriving at the airfield Chelsea noticed the plane was different. Smiling to herself, she didn’t put it past Irene to consider such a thing and ensure there were no memories to contend with. The woman was truly that astute. This time, it was Chelsea who would enjoy seeing Tuck experience a new way of life for the first time. Watching his expressions and reactions to having his own plane was priceless. He was like a kid, kind of like Preston when John allowed him to tour the plane for the first time. It must be a guy thing, as near as Chelsea could figure, this fascination with all things mechanical, cars, planes, and trains. Whatever it was, Tuck was just like the rest of them. The first part of their romantic getaway together, Tuck spent in the cockpit with the pilots.

When he finally did come back and take his seat, he was grinning like she had never seen. He was beyond happy. All morning, he had been overjoyed about the trip. Even Sara Beth’s pitiful pleading to go couldn’t sway him. Each time she would beg, he would explain how important this trip was to them and assure her they would be home soon. Eventually, Sara Beth gave up and kissed him goodbye but made sure they knew she wasn’t happy about it. While he wouldn’t tell Chelsea where they were going, he assured her that if they enjoyed themselves as much as he anticipated, then they could take the girls the next time. Just before falling asleep the night before, he told her he didn’t want to be one of those couples who vacationed without their kids. This case was an exception, though. He remained determined that they would have their time alone.

The flight was long, leading Chelsea to believe that they were flying internationally. After several hours, Tuck told her she might as well settle in and rest. How could she when she was so excited? Taking care not to compare, she couldn’t help but remember how exciting it was to be heading off to some exotic destination with John. Now, she was able to do something similar with Tuck, but this time, because of his excitement over the surprise, the trip was even more thrilling. At one point, he leaned his head over on her head rest and grinned as he reminded her how much he loved her and how their lives could always be this exciting if she wanted. That was exactly what she wanted, their lives to be full of adventure and surprises. Most all of Tuck’s life he had done nothing but work on the farm, same life, day in and day out. She wanted to watch him finally follow his dreams, whatever they may be.

Since early in her marriage with John, Chelsea hadn’t traveled much, and she hadn’t really missed it. They settled into a quite eventless routine, mostly so they could be there for Lucy. During his sickness, they traveled more but only to visit doctors and seek second and third and fourth opinions. After a while, realizing that there were no other alternatives other than to wait for a heart transplant, they stopped traveling again. Looking back, it felt more like a horrendous movie she had watched than a life she experienced. Everything during those months seemed like a foggy nightmare. Now though, with Tuck beside her, Chelsea felt as if life were really just beginning.

Tuck could hardly believe he was awake. His new life seemed more like a fantastic dream than it did reality. There they were, jetting off to the south of France, about to spend a week in a castle, complete with servants, and just a week before he was trying to keep from losing everything.

Since learning of the money John had left him, Tuck never once felt any moral dilemma over taking it. He kept recalling how John felt he owed him that and much more. If John’s viewpoint was accurate, then absolutely, he did owe him millions and much more. Tuck went to convince John to come for Chelsea because Tuck truly loved her. Because of that, not only had he lost years with her, but he had also given up a part of her completely. If John had never come, Chelsea would have grieved over him but never to the extent that she did as his wife. Their union made things different. Again, looking at life from John’s perspective, John was given everything when given a life with Chelsea, much more than his money was worth. So if John wanted to thank him, Tuck would take the money and use it well. However, Tuck believed that deep down, John’s motives were much more directed toward Chelsea’s ultimate welfare than about paying any actual debt. John was wise enough to predict how Tuck would feel about using Chelsea’s money, which would lead to contention, causing Chelsea harm in the long run. Since John’s first priority was always Chelsea, he was supposing that if he gave Tuck the money directly, then Tuck might see things in a different light and provide for Chelsea as John himself would have. John was shrewd, to be sure, but Tuck was catching on pretty quickly. Since, though, the greatest concern of both of them was Chelsea, Tuck would take the money as if it were really due him. If John used the money to make Chelsea a princess, then Tuck would make her a queen. He smiled at that, knowing they were on their way to their very own castle.

Driving through the French countryside, already Chelsea was eager to know exactly where they were going. When she discovered they weren’t staying in a hotel in the city, her mind started whirling, wondering exactly what Irene and Tuck had in store for her. Not long after her fourth time to ask Tuck for another hint, the estate began to come into focus. That’s when the driver showed her the castle.

Gasping, Chelsea asked, “Are we staying there?”

“We are.” Tuck reached for her and pulled her nearer. “It’s your very own castle for the week.”

Stunned, she stammered, “You mean it’s just us?”

“Just us. Rare, huh?”

She placed her hand on his face and stroked his cheek. “Very rare.”

Already having children when they married, there had never been time for just them. Having had only one official date and then the one night honeymoon, they needed this time alone.

She sighed and sat back in her seat, saying, “I’m so glad we came.”

As the old stone castle came better into view, she thought,
I really do feel like a princess
, but she would have never said such a thing, knowing how Tuck felt about Lucy saying John made her one. That was something she would only treasure in her heart.

Hours later, after one of the most incredible meals of her life, Chelsea followed behind Tuck as he led her out and into the gardens. Still, she could hardly believe this was her Tuck pulling her along. Wearing a tuxedo and looking like a movie star, he seemed bigger than life. It wasn’t only she who thought so as Chelsea had noticed several of the young maids staring at him, clearly admiring how handsome he was. Maybe the week before such a thing would have stirred up a bit of jealousy, but not anymore. Clearly, this man had eyes only for her.

Since they had dressed, with her in a slender fit black gown, Tuck had hardly taken his eyes off her. Other than the cocktail dress she wore in L.A., he had never seen her dressed so formally. All evening he admired her, telling her how beautiful she was to him. Many times he caressed her bare shoulders, a few times even, leaning in to kiss them. He was once again the romantic, the man who created the most unforgettable first date and honeymoon. All the months of distance and uncertainty were finally behind them. He was himself again.

They discussed most anything but the girls as Tuck was adamant that the evening be about them. He asked her questions about when she was in school, how things were going with the Keller Foundation, and even listened as she told him about a book she had been reading. This night, he was perfectly attentive and romantic, not the farmer who usually came in exhausted, trying to divide his time between children and a wife. He smiled continuously, causing her to know he was having just as wonderful of a time as she. The night was magical.

Out in the garden, realizing the night air was a bit cooler than was comfortable for her, Tuck removed his jacket and draped it over Chelsea’s shoulders. Her reaction to his gesture was puzzling, a mixture of gratitude with maybe a touch of sadness. Whatever caused such an expression brought John to Tuck’s mind. Maybe he had done something similar. Even if that was the case, he refused to allow the notion to ruin what was such a perfect evening together.

In his penguin suit, he felt quite confident, not at all what he expected. When he first began to get dressed, in his very own dressing chamber with a valet to assist, he felt ridiculous, but as the night wore on, he began to appreciate how such formality on his part was wooing his precious wife. He wasn’t sure he had seen her as happy since they married. She was without question, and she was so breathtaking, he could hardly do anything but stare at her, wondering how he had been so blessed. Not many men could ever hope for a second chance after the way he had blown it, but he had held on to hope, and look at the outcome. She was his, and no matter what, he would always be thankful for every moment together going forward. That would never slip away again.

“I need you to know how sorry I am.” He brushed her hair from her eyes.

Curious, she asked, “Sorry for what?”

“For a while I stopped fighting.” He sighed. “I hadn’t given up, but I didn’t have much left in me to fight.”

Taking her hand, he led her to sit on a bench near a brilliant bed of colorful flowers. The backdrop was idyllic and truly made him feel as if they were in some romantic movie.

“Before we married, I told you I would always fight for you, that I was going to fight for
all
of you.” Tuck leaned up and rested his elbows on his knees. “What I heard you say took the fight right out of me for a while. Then things got so bad with the house and farm, eventually, I could hardly bear up under the weight of it all.”

He turned to look at her. Smiling, he assured her, “I’m really back in the fight now.”

Chelsea reached for his shoulder and pulled him back. “You don’t have to fight for me. If I’ve learned anything from this time, it’s that I love you more than I even knew. I was terrified of losing you.”

She leaned in closer. “I don’t think it’s wrong that there’s a small stash of love left for him behind some closed door. I think that’s normal. He was my husband and Sara Beth’s father. Because of that, what I feel for you is not some lesser love. The fact that we’ve continued to love each other after all these years and all we’ve put each other through, doesn’t that make this the greater love? That’s what I feel.
This
is the greater love.”

Chelsea had been pondering these thoughts for some time. It was true. This never ending love they shared was truly the greater love, one that weathered the worst of life’s storms.

Tuck shook his head, hardly able to agree. “I want to say that it’s okay, that even the smallest bit of love for him behind a closed door is all right, but it’s not. Maybe this makes me selfish, but I want all of you, and I won’t rest until I have it. Bringing you here, making you a queen for a week, this is just the beginning.” He grinned and clarified, “I say queen because you are too much of a woman now to try to be a princess.”

He kissed the tip of her nose. “You’ll see. I’ll do whatever it takes to win you back from him, every ounce of you.” Hesitating a moment, he finally admitted, “I’m not jealous of him. I am jealous
for
you.”

His words shook her up entirely, reminding her of the deeper place where God had begun to lead her before they married. For a short time, she felt as if she were treading in deeper waters with Him, but then the wedding and the move came. Trouble in their marriage soon took over, and before she knew it, she was wading in the shallows again, not pondering those things which God was trying to show her. This, though, was a spark that ignited what she had felt during that time, a reminder of how God was jealous for her and wanted all of her. Her husband was merely reflecting Jesus in his desire to have all of her as well. For once, she was determined to give them both what they wanted.

In their room and snuggled in bed together after the end of the most perfect night he had ever had, Tuck raised up and propped himself on one elbow. For just a moment he stared at her as she looked up at him with the sweetest expression.

Leaning in, he whispered, “I’m so in love with you.”

Quickly, he covered her lips with his, unwilling to hear her lesser expression of love in return. No matter what she called a greater love, anything but being as completely in love with him as he was with her was what he considered to be the lesser love. Just as he had promised her, he would take it all eventually. He had no doubt of that.

The following morning Chelsea woke to an empty bed. Tempted to go and find Tuck, she instead huddled under the covers and recollected the night before. Of all their nights together, none was more beautiful or passionate, and that was saying something. If there was one area where neither held back, it was in making love, but this past night surpassed them all.