Beyond Chance (11 page)

You and me both. I drew in a long breath and
texted back. Not wanting to mention the fact that Jason had failed
to mention this to her as well.

I’m off to track him down. I don’t know
where he went. Day one in Paris is going really well. So glad I
came. You Sullivans have some really bad habits.

She texted back.

Don’t get lost. Stay close to the
apartment.

Here I was about to venture onto the streets
of Paris, looking for someone who didn’t want to be found, and I
had no idea what I even wanted to say to him. I was hurt that he
didn’t tell me about any of these developments, and at this point
Elizabeth was a small part of the whole situation. I tossed my
phone on the bed and grabbed my makeup, opening it up and quickly
patting powder on my face to take away the red. Sort of.

I changed shirts and grabbed my passport and
tucked it in a small purse, along with some credit cards. Even
though I knew he wouldn’t pick up, I dialed his phone and it went
to voicemail.

I grabbed the set of keys off the dining
room table and made my way through the apartment. Even with the
mess going on, the space was calming, and I hoped with all my heart
this wouldn’t be the last day I enjoyed it.

I locked the front door and rather than take
the elevator, I found the stairs and descended quickly. With my
luck I’d get stuck in the elevator and no one would find me. I
hadn’t had the best of luck with elevators, but at least this one
didn’t argue with me.

Since I didn’t remember the code to unlock
the door to get back into the apartment building, it made me all
the more determined to find Aaron. I opened the door and took a
deep breath of cinnamon and sugar as I stepped outside to feel the
warm air against my skin. I closed the door and began walking down
the sidewalk away from La Crêperies Parfaites when a strange
sensation ran through my body.

I paused and scanned the sidewalk, and
rather than continue walking away from the café, I walked toward
it. There were several outside diners sitting at the tables,
smoking and chatting. I reached the corner and glanced down the
sidewalk to see even more outdoor seating. All the umbrellas were
open to shield the patrons from the blazing sun, which made it
difficult to see the faces of the people sitting at the tables.

But my heart fell when my gaze managed to
stumble upon one figure in particular. I knew it was Aaron. I’d
recognize that body anywhere. I didn’t need to see his face to know
it was him, and I didn’t need to see Elizabeth’s either. I watched
Aaron take a sip of a cappuccino as he stared at Elizabeth. She was
sitting across from him, leaning over the table as her lips moved
incessantly.

I wanted to spin around and run away. I
finally understood the comfort that seemed to bring to Aaron and
Gabby, but I had nowhere to go. I couldn’t open the door to get
back inside. I’d just be running through a city that didn’t seem to
want me.

Aaron set his cup down and continued to
stare at Elizabeth. He didn’t say a word. He listened, and my heart
twisted in knots as I thought about the chance he was giving her to
explain her side of things; yet with me, he fled.

And he fled to her.

The last thought that pumped from my mind to
my heart about did me in. I so desperately wanted to be anywhere
but here. I begged for the cracks on the sidewalk to open up and
swallow me before I burst into tears again. I certainly couldn’t do
that in front of her. I wouldn’t give her that satisfaction.

Or him for that matter.

With that last thought, I spun on my heels
and ran right into the server who had a tray full of cappuccinos.
His quick movement wasn’t quick enough as one of the mugs slid off
the tray and crashed onto the concrete below. I gasped and glanced
over my shoulder as Aaron stood up and Elizabeth grimaced from her
seat.

“Excusez-moi, Mademoiselle.” I turned my
attention back to the server, who was now apologizing profusely
even though the fiasco had been my fault. I shook my head and
uttered a feeble apology in French and walked around the mess as
another server came to help pick up the heap of espresso, foam and
ceramic.

I quickly rounded the bend, when I felt
Aaron’s fingers grasp hold of my arm and pull me to a stop. Even
his touch had the power to break me, and all I wanted was to shrink
into the pavement.

“Brandy,” Aaron’s voice was completely calm
and collected, yet I felt like the moment I opened my mouth, I’d
break down. How was he able to shut things off so easily?

I kept my gaze on the sidewalk as he stepped
in front of me. He tilted my chin up to meet his gaze, and all I
could give him was an exasperated sigh of defeat. Resentment was
beating its way into my mind as I stared at the man who I loved
more than anything in this world.

“Don’t you need to go back to Elizabeth?”
The moment I uttered the words, I hated myself for it. I wasn’t
that petty person, yet he reduced me to a sniveling muddle of
emotions while he stood strong without a stitch of regret.

“It’s not like that,” he murmured.

“Of course it’s not.” I glared at him, but
my trembling lips gave away the true state of my emotions. “Nothing
ever is, right?”

Aaron let go of my arm, and I stepped back,
relieved that this section of the patio was clear of diners.

“Would you mind letting me know what the
code is to the apartment? Now that I’ve found you, I don’t know
what to do with you… so I’d just like to go back upstairs and
pack.”

Aaron let out a sigh and ran his fingers
along the stubble on his chin. “I messed up.”

“Sherlock would be proud.” I stared at him
and saw a slight twitch of his mouth, which only infuriated me
more. “The code. Do you mind?”

“I do mind. We need to talk, and I think we
should find a neutral place to discuss things.”

“Neutral?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at
him.

“Yes. Neutral.”

“This isn’t really anything I want to go
over in public. I’m wrapped in knots inside. There is no end to my
confusion. My mind’s a mess, and there’s no undoing it unless you
explain what I saw online. I need to know why you wouldn’t tell me
something so important… so life altering…” I stopped myself from
saying something I would regret. “It makes me feel like you don’t
think I’m worth opening up to and doing this all over a cappuccino
isn’t my idea of getting to the heart of the matter. Maybe it works
with Elizabeth, but it doesn’t work with me.”

His jaw tensed, and he looked over at the
door to our building. “I deserve that.”

“You deserve more than that.”

Ignoring my comments, he reached for my hand
and cupped it in his. “Let me take you somewhere that’s secluded.
I’ll answer any questions you have, and I’ll tell you everything. I
don’t want us to discuss this where we plan on spending the rest of
our time while in Paris. The apartment isn’t big enough.”

I let out a sigh and avoided his gaze.
“Who’s to say I’ll be staying.”

“Only you, but I beg you to hear me out…”
his voice trailed off and the coolness I’d detected earlier was
long gone. “Look at me, Brandy. Please.”

My heart and mind were racked with chaos as
I slowly brought my gaze to his. Deep pain plagued his expression,
and I wanted nothing more than to forgive him and move on, but I
was smart enough to know if we didn’t deal with these things now,
they would forever haunt our future. And I wasn’t prepared to
donate what time I had left on earth living as a tortured soul,
waiting for the next big revelation to surface.

He squeezed my hand, and I nodded slowly.
“Don’t you need to let Elizabeth know you’re not returning?”

“Believe me. She knows.” His gaze hardened,
but he didn’t say anymore as we began walking down the sidewalk.
With every step, my heart frayed a little more knowing that our
lives would never be the same.

I had no idea where we were in the city, but
he led me through a wrought iron gate that had a matching fence
encircling a meticulously maintained garden. Scarlet and purple
flowers dripped from the beds, spilling onto a gravel path that led
to a row of empty benches. Tall laurels provided a wall of privacy
from the bustling street. It felt like we’d been sucked into a
hidden world miles away from everything and everyone, but the same
problems still existed.

On the way, and despite my protests, Aaron
bought sliced meat and rolls. Placing the bag on the bench, he
motioned for me to take a seat. If we weren’t about to embark on
something so serious, I would’ve enjoyed wandering through the
garden, but all I cared about was getting answers.

He took out a bottle of water and offered it
to me. I gladly accepted, twisted off the cap and began sipping it
while he sat quietly next to me. There was a stubborn silence as if
neither of us wanted to break the barrier that would begin the
barrage of questions and answers. My mind was ready, but I wasn’t
sure my heart was prepared.

“So I’m guessing you looked at the links
this time.” His gaze fastened on mine, and my voice wouldn’t come.
I nodded in response and tucked a leg under my body, turning toward
him. Our bodies were close but not touching. I needed it to be that
way so I wouldn’t dissolve into him.

He took a sip of water and looked at the
gravel beneath his feet. “I don’t know where to begin.”

“How about we start at the beginning,” I
said, after a few seconds of silence. “When you took on your
biological father’s name. Let’s start there.”

He sucked on his lip and a flash of his
tongue piercing glistened. I couldn’t help but smile at the
distractions this man always seemed to deliver. He was full of
contradictions and surprises. Often one led to the other, but it
was the unknowns in between that worried me. I glanced across the
path at a white rose and slowly slid my hand to his knee.

Aaron let out a deep breath and scratched
his chin. “Well, you already know that I was in the Marines,
alongside Jason. I changed my name before joining. It was foolish,
but things always happen for a reason, I suppose. I was thankful I
had Sullivan to go back to.”

I nodded, and my body began to relax as our
eyes connected.

“Jason and I wanted more out of our time in
the service. So when we returned from our first tour, we put our
sights on the Special Forces unit. It was a grueling process and
both of us wondered what the hell we’d signed ourselves up for once
we started. Soldiers began dropping out on the very first day of
training, which only made me want it more. I wanted to prove that I
could do it. That I was worthy of carrying out the most sensitive
missions our country had to offer. It was what I clung to in order
to get through the training. Every day I thought it couldn’t get
worse and then it went downhill tenfold the next day. What they
demanded of us was nothing less than perfection, and I needed to
prove to someone somewhere that I was needed. That I had a place in
the world.”

My heart stung at his admission, yet I kept
my gaze steady on his. I knew he wouldn’t want anything
misconstrued as pity. What he didn’t realize was that all I had for
him was admiration. The moment I read the articles online, I was in
awe. I didn’t understand why he wouldn’t tell me. Why he wouldn’t
share such a huge part of his life with me.

“I became part of the 1
^st
MSOB
division…” He saw the look of bewilderment on my face and backed
up. “Sorry. It stands for Marine Special Operations Battalion. It
falls under another alphabet game, MSOC. Marine Special Operations
Companies.”

I wanted to ask if that was before or after
Elizabeth, but I kept my mouth shut.

“I was really proud of my accomplishment,
but I had no one to share it with. No family to tell. Unless you
count Jason.” He grinned, and the tension between us continued to
dissipate. I was finally beginning to see the side he’d hidden for
so long.

“He’d probably be offended if you didn’t.” I
smiled, and we both knew it was true.

“A week before Jason and I were scheduled
for our first tour, I met Elizabeth. We met at a bar. She was with
some friends. It turned out she was headed to Afghanistan as well.
I never saw her as anything more than platonic. I thought we were
on the same page.”

I tried to swallow discreetly, even though
it felt like I was trying to push a boulder down my throat. I
hadn’t expected Elizabeth to factor into his story so quickly. I
started to feel a little lightheaded and realized the brioche from
earlier wasn’t cutting it. I pointed at the bag and Aaron
smiled.

“I told you I knew what I was talking about.
This kind of discussion requires sustenance.” He pulled out a
napkin and placed a roll and a couple slices of meat on it.