Authors: Shyla Colt
BikersLibrarian (17 page)
“I shoved the shit down and moved forward, always clinging
tight to the anger. I was an angry man when I got out. Readjustment is harsh
and I had no one to help me through. Another thing I blamed you for.”
“I would’ve been there. If only you had said the word,” Joel
said. “You never stopped being my little brother, Daniel. I love you. “
Shooter sighed. “It’s not a matter of not loving you
anymore. That would make things easy. You’re my blood. But I don’t trust you.
I’m not sure if I ever can again. You want things to go back to the way they
were.” He shook his head. “I don’t know if that’s possible.”
“No, I didn’t expect that. I just want us to be in each
other’s lives. I want to know what’s going on with you. I want to tell you when
Brittany makes the honor roll.” Joel sighed. “You start getting older and you
realize how important family is.”
Shooter sighed. “I just want to understand why. How could
you do something like that? I idolized you.” The hurt returned full force.
Suddenly he was that lance corporal coming home to find everything had changed.
Lost, hurting and confused, he’d been a total wreck.
“It’s hard being left behind. You miss the person you love,
and you’re constantly worried. Only, you can’t let them know. You have to put
up this front and pretend you’re far braver than you ever really feel. We
didn’t want you to worry about us because it might take your focus off what was
important.” Joel closed his eyes. The lines around his eyes and his mouth stood
out, and Shooter realized just how long it’d been since he saw him last. He
felt a twinge of regret. “We bonded over that. When she woke up in the middle
of the night after nightmares about what might happen to you, I was the one she
called and confided in.”
“How do you go from that to cheating, Joel? I don’t get it.”
He clenched his jaw.
If they loved him so much, why had this happened?
“It just slowly shifted. All that time spent together baring
our souls and getting to know each other better. I fell for her. I don’t have
to tell you how amazing she is.” He shook his head. “I fought it. I tried to
date other women, and we started spending less time together. All that did was
make us both miserable.”
“So why not just tell me. It would’ve hurt, but it wouldn’t
have ripped my heart out of my chest.”
“We wanted to do it in person. You deserved better than a
Dear John.”
“Trust me, I would’ve preferred that.” Shooter shook his
head. The ball of pain permanently attached to the memory of his brother and Angelina
began to untangle for the first time.
“I don’t want to go to my grave with you hating me, Daniel.”
“I don’t hate you, Joel. I hate what you did and how it
destroyed our relationship.” The words freed something inside him. A lightness
began to wash over him.
I hate the situation, not the people.
“Why the sudden change? Not that I’m complaining.” Joel held
up his hands.
“It’s all Juliette. She deserves me at my best with both
feet firmly planted in the present ready to move on to the future.” It had
taken a very intelligent woman to make him see he’d been hurting himself.
“It sounds serious.”
“It is.”
“Well, I wish you happiness.”
“It’s the only option.” Shooter smiled.
“Jesus you got cocky, and scary… I wasn’t prepared for
that,” Joel said.
“Yeah your days of kicking my ass are over, old man.”
“I’m not old,” Joel growled.
“Yeah, they say forty is the new thirty.”
“Dick,” Joel said. The smile on his face took the sting from
his words. They weren’t okay yet, but Shooter knew eventually, they would be.
They spent the rest of the night catching up. Streaks of
purple and orange preceded the sunrise as he stepped from the hotel, an idea
caught fire in his brain. Pleased, he climbed on to his bike and took a left
onto the street.
It won’t be first time I’ve gone a day without sleep.
After
a few stops he pulled up to their house a little after seven.
Our house.
Pride
swelled his chest. They were building a life together. Still, the shit wasn’t
enough. He wanted something more permanent. When you found the person you were
meant to be with, you knew it. Grabbing the paper bag from his saddlebags he
walked up to the door and let himself inside. He headed straight to the Keurig
and made a cup of chai. They’d been together long enough for him to know the
fastest route to escaping the doghouse. With her favorite breakfast and a
steaming cup of tea he crept up the stairs to the bedroom they’d redecorated
per her insistence. Sunlight kissed her brown skin and she lay on her back. His
white t-shirt rode high up on her thighs, and he licked his lips. He walked
over to the bed, set the bag on the dresser and sank down on the edge of the
bed. She rolled to the side toward him. He ran his fingers down her back,
soaking up the warmth pouring off her skin.
“Mmm?” she nuzzled her face into the pillow.
“Wake up, baby.”
“No.” She moaned. “So tired.”
“Open those eyes for me.”
She grunted. Her eyelids fluttered open and she wrinkled her
nose. “Well, you’re here unmarred so I take that as a good sign.”
“We have some things to talk about. I don’t apologize much,
but keeping this shit to myself was a shady move. “ He shook his head. “You
were worried about me having feelings for Angelina.”
She tensed and he massaged her neck.
It’s time to speak
unfiltered. She deserves that.
“The truth is, this has always been about
Joel. I trusted him, he was my best friend, and in the blink of an eye all that
changed at the worst possible time. It was easier to see him as my enemy than
to deal with it. What I did in the Corps took everything I had. Being a sniper
is hard on the sanest person. So you have to put the outside world in a box. It
was a bad habit I carried with me after my release.”
“Shooter,” she whispered.
“No, I don’t want your pity. I want be honest. I refuse to
let anything come between us, Juliette.”
“What happened last night?” She sat up.
“I did what you suggested. I spoke with him, let go of the
past.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Why now?”
He offered the black and silver cup to her and she took it
with a small smile of thanks. Grabbing the brown paper bag off the dresser he
shook it playfully. “Because I want to move forward with you. There’s no room
for bullshit from the past weighing us down. I never want you to doubt me.” He
looked away.
She opened the bag. “You got me beignets?”
“From your favorite coffee shop.” His hands grew clammy.
Blood rushed in his ears.
Fuck I’m lightheaded.
“I will always do whatever
it takes to make you happy.” His hand shook and he reached in his pocket. “If
you say yes I promise I’ll bring you tea and sugary-ass breakfast pastries
after every fight.”
“Shooter?”
He opened the black case to reveal the two-karat princess
cut diamond Joey had helped him pick out. “When I said you were mine I meant
that shit forever. Not only are you my heart, you have mine. I never thought
I’d fully trust someone again, but you crept in under my radar and changed
everything.” He laughed, thinking of the progress they’d made over the past
seven months. “I’m not going to be completely satisfied until you’re wearing my
ring, sharing my last name, and one day, growing my baby.”
“I didn’t expect this.” She covered her mouth with her
hands.
“Baby, the only thing I want to hear come out of your mouth
right now is ‘yes’.” Nerves flared.
Did I misread her?
“
Oh my god, yes! Of course yes!”
He breathed a sigh of relief and slipped his ring on her
finger. “I’m not a patient man, baby. You have six months to plan this shit and
we’re walking down the aisle.”
“You know I love it when you take control.”
“Eat your breakfast, so we can celebrate properly.”
She brought the powdery dessert to her lips and he moaned.
His phone buzzed in his pocket. “Son of a bitch.”
He dug it out and put it to his ear. “Hello.”
“I hate to call you this early, but I just found out our boy
Peter got taken out in jail,” Moose said.
“What?” Juliette glanced up and he held up a finger.
“What the fuck happened?”
“You know the drill, no one saw anything. Someone didn’t
want him to talk. All his transactions and client lists have been wiped.”
Shooter whistled. “I want to be happy about this, but I
don’t think this is over.”
“No, but your girl should be safe at least. That’s
something,” Moose said.
“That’s everything man. Thanks for the heads-up.” He
disconnected and turned to Juliette. “We got an early wedding present. Stant’s
dead.”
“What, how?”
Shooter shook his head. “Someone in jail, whoever he’s in
bed with, doesn’t want anything getting out.”
“Is it over?” she whispered.
He took the bag and the mug from her hand and set them on
the night stand. “It is for you, baby. You’re finally free.” She pulled back.
“But what ab—”
“No baby, right now is for us.”
He leaned over and captured her lips. The sweetness of her
mouth and the unexpected gift of threat removal brought him peace. He couldn’t
protect what the future held, and they still had a lot to work out, but he knew
who’d be beside him, and for now that was enough.
Told once “You have to be an author, then your craziness
becomes eccentric”, Shyla Colt has always been in love with the written word
and possessed a desire to write. Named after Super Girl in the comics, she
often mistakes her mortality for super hero status. So she holds many hats;
Mother, Marine Wife and writer are her top three. Writing allows her to explore
new venues, face her demons, and touch others. A huge practitioner of paying it
forward and putting in what you want to get out, she hopes to inspire, enlighten,
move and entertain you with her work. Mixing humor, drama and strong women,
often with a paranormal element, she continues to soldier ahead in the writing
field from her SoCal home. One of her favorite things is talking to fans. If
you’d like to learn more or just drop a line, please check out her website.
Shyla welcomes comments from readers. You can find her
website and email addresses on her
author
bio page
at
www.ellorascave.com
.
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Ellora’s Cave Publishing
Biker’s Librarian
ISBN 9781419991561
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Biker’s Librarian Copyright © 2015 Shyla Colt
Edited by Elizabeth London
Cover design by Dar Albert
Cover photography by ekhphoto, Vitaly Krivosheev, dmitriynaboka
Electronic book publication January 2015
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