Black Dawn (30 page)

“What the fuck is wrong with me?” Feeling like a voyeur, he shook his head.

He couldn’t rid himself of the image of Lexi kicked back in a skirt, crossing one dark-covered leg over the other, propping her boots on an opposite chair. She sipped her smoothie, her cheeks hollowing, as she paged through a magazine with a big-ass gun on the cover. Christ, he’d never seen anything sexier.

His phone rang, and the screen showed Sugar’s name and face. Swiping to answer, he couldn’t even manage hello for all of his distracted thoughts. “
That’s
what you brought her as a change of clothes?”

Sugar laughed her ass off. “The girl’s, like, five inches shorter than me, like a buck ten. We don’t wear the same size. We went shopping.”

“Where, Biker Bitches Depot?” But wherever that store was, he was getting a line of credit.

“Turns out we like the same stores.”

“Imagine that. And you, what, suggested that skirt?” Or rather the scrap that was crawling up Lexi’s legs every time she fidgeted. Really, he should thank Sugar. But hell, God only knew how many red-blooded, unattached men roamed this building—actually none, now that he thought about it. Some had cleared out for training, and some had just gone home. He was supposed to mine some more intel, yet he really wanted to stake claim on Lexi at that moment.

“No, boy genius.” She laughed again. “The skirt was all her. My contribution would be the garters holding up that hose.”

Holy. Fuck.

“You’re welcome. I’m on my way out. Have her call if she needs anything.”

“See ya, Sugar.” Parker hung up the phone, grabbed a couple things, and headed to what was his.

CHAPTER FORTY-ONE

After the tenth page of guns and knives and things that caused mass destruction, Lexi realized there were many things in the world that she didn’t have experience with or even thought existed. Assault rifle upgrades? Who knew those bad boys needed modifications. And all these charts for velocity and accuracy? Guess it wasn’t as easy as “point and shoot.” Guns had specs like computers did, which logically made sense. But she’d never bothered thinking it over. She knew phishing, phreaking, spoofing, and spyware. Parker, it seemed, knew both.

Her mind slid back to him. She wondered what he’d found or where he was. Sugar had said she’d find him, but he was working. The door shot open, and Lexi jumped.

Parker.

That honey-warm feeling she now expected when she saw him rushed through her veins, making her legs and arms feel heavy. But it also reminded her that she had dressed for her, for him, to be noticed, and be her own person.

“Hi.” She unfolded her legs from the chair she’d perched against.

“Hey.” His eyes raked down her.

She’d taken time to brush her hair with a real brush, not just Parker’s comb. They’d grabbed her new makeup, and she swore there was confidence in wearing new, sexy lingerie. Sugar had sworn it was true, and she’d been right. Though sliding back into a style Lexi loved had also been a boost.

His dark-blue eyes smoldered as he stalked to her, and her eyes dropped to his hands—a roll of duct tape?
Oh shit
. Her stomach dropped. What the hell was that all about?

The scratching crack of the tape being unrolled in his hands made her eyes go wide, but he quickly bypassed her. A breeze settled over her, and she watched in complete confusion, spinning in the chair. Parker took one piece of dark tape and secured it over the wall. Stretch, tear. He and another piece of tape moved across the room, where he did the same. One more time, Parker repeated the action then turned to her.

The heat burning between them was enough to singe her clothes, make them turn to dust and blow away. The thickness of his erection bulged in his pants, and the sight of him hungry for her, the realization that he’d just covered every camera in the room, consumed her.

Instantaneously, she was aroused. “Parker—”

He grabbed her hips and lifted her onto the table. His full lips took hers, her tongue hungrily seeking out his. With her thighs clenched to his hips, she moaned into his mouth, needing what only he could make her feel. The impossible. Loved without fear of abandonment.

His large hands cupped her legs, running high until his touch moved above the garter-supported stockings. “Fucking hell, you are the sexiest thing.”

She refused to let him stop kissing her, and her mind wouldn’t compose a response for her to speak. Instead, she reached for his zipper as he ran a hand over the tops of her legs.

“Damn.”

Damn because she was soaking her panties? Damn because she’d found the silkiest things they sold? Didn’t matter—the reaction was what she wanted. He slid the fabric aside, and she pressed herself against his fingers.

“Yes,” she hissed. “Please.”

Without a second’s hesitation, Parker speared her with two fingers. She cried out, stifling herself with a bite to his shoulder. Their arms tangled, the masculine hair on his arm rubbing against her forearms as she unbuckled his pants. It was wild and rushed and absurd how they couldn’t keep their hands to themselves in the middle of this… war room.

She freed him. His erection bobbed heavy, and Parker wasted no time. One deep thrust, and she bit his shoulder again. Have mercy, this was incredible.

“Fuck, Lex,” he growled.

“You’re telling me. God.” She wrapped her legs around him. Everything before had been sweet and deep, but this was a carnal drug addiction.

He powered into her, holding her to him, making her take every single insane inch of his pleasure.

Their breaths echoed in her ears. “So good.”

He grunted in response. Lexi’s climax built immediately. Her mind was already there, surprised and shocked by how brutally amazing this was.

“More.” Seriously, she’d said it—hadn’t thought it and didn’t know how it was even possible.

Parker gripped her tight enough to crush her, and his rigid length pounded her until she was blinded with impending bliss. Her muscles banded tight and rippled. The orgasm sideswiped her to some other dimension, making the room fade. White light and all those sparkly, shiny fireworks ignited as forever spanned into a climax coma.

He seated himself deep inside her and strained his release. Her head lolled back, embracing that intimacy of his bare length coming inside her.

Parker took a deep breath, his head dropping on top of hers, his lips murmuring in her hair. Finally, he pulled away and slid her off the table. “I cannot get enough of you.”

They both righted themselves, but she knew she looked like she’d just been fucked. God and every person in this building probably knew how loud she was, even muffled by Parker’s shoulder, but screw it. She didn’t care.

“Never going to look at this table the same way again.”

She covered her mouth, trying not to laugh. “Oh, my God.”

“I had every intention of taking you to dinner and updating you. Got a little side-tracked, but still seems like a good idea. You hungry?”

“Sure, yeah.” She smoothed her skirt and could still feel him inside her. She needed to run to the ladies’ room, but she also loved how he’d internally marked her. “Do you, um, need to remove the duct tape? Why was that there? I mean, I guess it makes sense, but…”

He guided her out of the room and laughed. “Trust no one. Plus, a couple years back, I busted Winters and Mia damn near getting it on against a motel room door. I got pictures and everything.”

She smacked his chest. “That’s awful.”

He hooked an arm around her. “He’s going to get me back one day, but today wasn’t going to be it. Besides, their stuff was tame enough. They hadn’t gotten through the door yet. I adore Mia, and Winters is my boy. All good fun.”

“Well, if I’m the one he gets you back with, let me know—”

Parker pulled to a stop, scowling. “You really don’t get it, do you?”

Her eyes went wide. “Well, um—” Was he talking about them? “I, uh…”

“If I could kill Matt, I would. Because Jesus, shit, he did a number on you.”

Oh, yeah, her invisible scars. They were still there, but why was Parker scowling about them?

He grabbed her hand and practically dragged her back to office. There he sat her on a rolling chair and spun her around to see every screen, every piece of equipment that hummed and blinked for his attention. “This, Lexi, is what I know. I’ve told you, same as you’ve told me, how I feel. I’ve never done love. I don’t do feelings because, until you, they didn’t get in my way. I never noticed the warm fuzzies and whatever else. That’s how my brain works.”

“Yes,” she whispered.

“I told you I loved you for shit’s sake because I do. And you’re all ‘if
you’re
the girl I get caught with’? Fuck me running, what the hell more do I have to do besides notify you how I feel and want to stick with you like I can’t get enough? Because news flash, sweetheart: I can’t.”

“Parker—”

“I’ve said the words, done what feels like the right actions. But damn it, Lex, what more am I supposed to do? I am out of my element.”

Her jaw hung open. “I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

His hands ran into his hair. “Shit. I’m not hurt. Nor am I concerned about you going anywhere. If that makes me a cocky motherfucker, fine. Call me cocky. But you need to realize what’s in front of you.”

“I see you. I do. I get it. I think. It’s just, I don’t know. I—”

“
You
are more amazing than even
you
know.” His hands rubbed over his face. “And I have
no idea
how to do more than be by your side, saying the words that I thought were supposed to do the trick, holding your hand—I mean, tell me what you need, Lex. Then consider it done.”

Unexpected tears streamed down her face. “I want you.”

“You need to trust me.”

“I trust
you
. It’s me I don’t.”

“Then fix it, Lex.”

She wiped her wet cheeks. “I’m trying.”

“Good.” He blew out a frustrated breath. “I can plan the crap out of a mission objective. Give me a little time, and this job is good as done.”

“I’m a job?” she squeaked.

“It’s the only way I know how to fix things.”

Her eyes went wide. “What do I have to do?”

“Grab on.” He extended his hand. “We’ll find a way to figure it out.”

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

Basketball played on Parker’s flat screen as he lounged in the living room while sipping his beer with his woman in his arms. Lex played on her tablet and mindlessly petted Bacon, same as she had every night this week. Titan didn’t have any teams on mission, and Jared had turned over all of Titan’s intel on the ARO to the Defense Intelligence Agency. Life was good. Parker could be lazy and do nothing, and he enjoyed the daily routine he and Lexi had picked up.

She twisted to face him. “I’ve identified part of my problem.”

“What are you working on?” he asked.

“No. I mean with me.”

Muting the college hoops, even though his bracket was totally killing it, he thought it was interesting that she’d figured out an aspect of the trust-herself problem when he was no closer to the resolution. If he’d had one of those within his sights, he could at least mentally crunch the numbers and know statistically if it had a shot in hell at being successful. “Alright. Shoot.”

His plan was to lie low, stay in bed, order delivery, make love, make her scream, walk the dog, and start over again. It might even be a solution. He wasn’t saying it wasn’t, but he had checked the computational value of just living as they were. Whatever, he was overthinking this. When she was ready to trust herself, she would.

She turned around again. Her back was on his stomach, her blond hair spread on his chest. Bacon was on the floor, snoring like a fat man, even if the girl had lost a few pounds. Lexi’s arm hung off the sofa, casually petting her dog and sometimes rolling the poor thing over when she got too loud. The casualness of it all made him comfortable, made him feel complete, as though he shouldn’t be anywhere but holding her and watching ball on TV.

“I don’t belong anywhere,” she said quietly. “I don’t go home at the end of the night because I don’t have anywhere to go.”

One week. Seven dinners, seven nights in bed. Eight mornings of waking with her in his arms, and he had no intention of making the eighth night any different. Actually, he had no intention of changing the eighth, the eighteenth, or the eightieth night, and he was confident about her thinking that too. “You don’t like staying here?”

She twisted to face him. “I love staying with you.”

“So stay here.” He shrugged.

“I can’t just stay here. I need a place where I
live
.”

“Seems like you’re living now.”

“You’re a guy. You don’t get it. I need a place that’s mine. With my things. My stuff. I mean, everything at my old house, I’m sure he’s sold it off or burned it or whatever. But I need more than just the stuff Sugar and I went shopping for.”