BOMAW Vol. 10-12 (24 page)

Shanna stepped away from him, thinking about it. Granted, she'd brought the fear up to turn him away from thinking she was hiding something to do with Shawn, but now that the ruse had been used, she couldn't help but wonder about it. She knew that it was a fact, that many law officers abused. Getting away with it for quite some time, due to inside cover ups. The fear was really not so far fetched. She turned to look up at him.

"How would I know?" She spoke her mind out loud, "How in the world, can I be certain, that you, might not turn out like him? It didn't start, the way it ended with him. What makes me so sure, that I'm not walking right back into the same thing, only worse this time. I mean, you're the very one, that I would call for help. Your fellow officers, they would all be on your side, they would ... help you cover up."

"Shanna please ... that's ridiculous."

"How so? You tell me why is it so ridiculous?! Can you stand there and say to me, that no police officer has ever abused his spouse? Can you?"

"Well of course I can't! Shanna, it happens most often with inner city police, due to the pressure and stress of their jobs. Hell, this might as well be Mayberry, for all the stress that takes place here. I mean, I have the odd occurrence from time to time, yes I do, but ... for the most part, no pressure here, nor stress for me. That's the reason I chose here. Because me, I like the simple things out of life. Nice ... slow ... easy. I much prefer, family, laughter, smiles, picnics, Sunday at the movies, dinner at a favorite restaurant." He stopped and smiled, thinking about it, "Evening walks through town or down a country lane, quiet nights on the front porch swing. Hell Shanna, I'm 'bout as boring as they come. I'm pretty much, laid back and at ease. I don't care much for a bunch of yelling and screaming to be honest. I wasn't raised with it, not something I find all that appealing. I never want us to fight Shanna, I'm not the fighting kind. I'd rather, take a walk, do some thinking, let you do some thinking, maybe come back, talk about it ... and then, maybe ... make a lil'love afterwards. That's about my speed, that's all I'm looking for Shanna, that's all. Just a gentle woman, to be ... gentle with. Most I'll no doubt be guilty of, is boring you to death."

Shanna stood staring and knew there was no way that he could bore her to death. All that he'd said, was all that she'd ever wanted.

"I don't mind, boring ... boring is good. I just ... I just need to be sure ... that's all ... because once I'm in, it's hell to get out." She imparted softly.

"Shanna, you living right down the road from your oldest brother. Come on, you think I'm stupid enough to pull anything with him breathing down my neck? Then there's Jake as well, what kind of fool do you take me for? Not to mention your father not too far away. A man would have to be insane to come up against the McPherson's ... and I can tell you now, that, I am not."

Shanna smiled, and then chuckled thinking,
'So right you are.'
She had the decency to blush, looking a bit ashamed of herself as she slowly approached him. "When you put it that way, I suppose it does come out, that I am at a greater advantage now. I mean, surrounded by family as I am."

"Yes you are. And that suits me just fine. Right here, right where we are, in the midst of your family. I have no problem with that. Fact, its where I prefer, so they can see, just how much, I'm gonna love you Shanna, make you happy. Keep you laughing, fill your days with joy ... and your nights ... well ... I'm afraid I won't be sharing that part, with them. That part there, stays between us, you and I. What you think?" He asked, moving in close to her, tossing his hat to the sofa, that way he could take her into his arms, where she gladly went.

"I think, that suits me, just fine. I think, considering that ... we just might, be okay." She smiled.

He slanted down to her lips, "You sure Shanna, absolutely sure?" He kissed them, gently, just a little peck. She lifted her arms around his neck. "Day by day that goes by, I'm sure, I'll be more sure, as the time ... goes." She slanted her head for another kiss, this one, lingered, grew more intense, caused them to part their lips, to taste and entwine their tongues. Royce groaned, "I'm afraid, my lunch ... is far too short ... to take this ... any further." He moaned against her lips.

"Well, there is the end of the day ... when your shift ends ... I can have dinner waiting for you ... or ... whatever else, you might ... prefer?"

Royce growled low, pulling her against him so she could feel what that stirred in him.

Shanna chuckled deep, kissing him once more and then stepped back. "Back to your duties now ... that'll have to do you until later." She smiled.

"I think I ate something on my lunch that's got my stomach all upset, I may have to call in ... stay here, let you fix me up."

Laughing Shanna went to her door, opening it, "I don't think so, out you go. There's a little old lady somewhere in town, needing a hand with her groceries, hop to it!"

*

L. A.

Shawn and Benjamin were on their way into Pen-tab publishing Tuesday morning, both dressed in suits, all the work done on their laptops. Drawn out on poster boards in full colorful splash for Shawn's presentations. Everything was done. Nothing was there left to complete. All the websites for the new authors, done. All book covers, done. The work for Mercy Jame's trilogy, done. Shawn felt light and easy. Every now and then he'd glance at the young man beside him, and in his gut, he was starting to feel, what every one else saw, that this young man, was indeed of his making.

His son.

While part of him had sought to know the truth directly from Christine's lips, there had still been that part of him that saw him as Jake's son. Day by day, that image, was slowly evaporating. With another glance at him, Shawn grinned saying, "You look pretty damn smart dressed up there kiddo."

Benjamin smiled, he'd been putting everything in order on his laptop, setting up more of his portfolio just in case, one never knew. With just a glance at the man beside him, he returned, "You think so huh?"

"Aih, not so bad if I must say so myself." He grinned.

Benjamin let a chuckle roll from his chest, "Wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that I, ah, happen to look just like you, would it?"

Shawn's grin broadened, "Oh it's helped, that's for damn sure."

Shaking his head laughing, Ben returned in comment, "Oh the times I've been accused of being arrogant, full of myself ... wonder where in the world it came from?"

"Haven't a clue kiddo, haven't a clue." Shawn drove on smiling, then found himself, speaking his mind, "I wonder how long it will be before that test comes back?"

"Surely you're not curious? What brought that own?" Ben returned, a bit sarcastic.

"You know what, you're merciless, you just won't let up, will you?"

"What me, merciless? Nooo, not I, why... merciless, would make me ... well ... like you, now wouldn't it."

Shawn thought about that a moment and then, glancing at him once more asked, "What makes you think, that I'm merciless?"

"Oh, the fact that, well... you are. Very mercenary. You are very, how should I say it, very hot and cold. You're not a man in the middle. You're either for, or against."

"Emmm, I see. So in your eyes, that makes me what? Good, or bad?"

"Well, what can I say, for those you love, it makes you good. For those you don't ... merciless."

"I see. So, where do you think you fit into all of that?"

"Wow, that's a brave question under our circumstances. Fine, I'll answer it, you don't love me, that's for certain."

Shawn's chest visibly rose and fell from that sigh. They were at a light as he digested that bit of observation, trying to think of the best way to come back at it. "I think you're merciless as well." He finally decided to say.

"Why is that?"

"Because you refuse to try and see things from my point of view. Right now, I'm not 100% sure, that you're my son. Right now, I stand in a place where its possible you're my brother's son. Because of that, I have no choice, but to be careful. To use caution. If I go the direction you wish, claiming you as my son, and it turns out that you're not; we, or, I will come off looking pretty much the idiot. And you will have caused a rift between you and your father, my brother, for nothing. Therefore, because of this, you label me, merciless. Does that seem fair to you?"

Benjamin stared out of his window, thinking about the time with him, the family so far. He wasn't stupid. He knew exactly what he was saying and he knew that as much as he wanted to ignore that fact, it was just that ... fact was ... things could go one way, or the other. Based on local gossip and hearsay, he was taking chances with his relationship towards both men, his father and uncle. Question was, who was which? Shawn, father or uncle? Jake, father or uncle? When they were forced to discuss it, it always came back to one person, his mother. What if ... IF ... all this time, she'd been telling him the truth? It was his turn to breath in deeply and release the sigh.

"You know what Shawn, I live in the same world that you do. This world and the problems that exist in it, there are thousands, millions of serious issues, ten times, no ... a thousand times greater than my own. Having said that, I suppose that I should have kept all to myself and been grateful for what I had. Quincy was a good step father to me and Jake, was the best father that he knew how to be, to me. Thinking back on it, it should have been enough. So, I guess needing to go that much further, makes me, selfish. Or ... merciless."

"I wouldn't go that far."

"Thanks ... but ... I don't know. When you live with years of doubt, years of people telling you stories, Quincy, telling me stories-..."

"What kind of stories?"

"Stories about you. When you all went to school together. Did you know, that you were, the local hero? Do you know that after you left, quite a few guys who used to run to you for protection, ended up getting beat up. Do you know, that most of the guys there, wish they could be like you. Did you know that?"

"No. I didn't. I didn't set out in my life, to be anyone's hero. My father, made it, my responsibility to see after my siblings. Now and again, someone would run to me for help, I couldn't just ... walk off and leave them when I could see they were scared. I hate bullies. I hate sorry ass, pathetic bullies or gangs who make it a point to gang up on one person they know can't defend themselves against their numbers ... or ... their size. Yet, we live in a world, full of bullies. Some more obvious than others. That, is the reason I dared them to cross me. Because I love, kicking the shit out of bullies. Anyone bullying my family, I'm usually the last person they want to see, in some cases, the last person they may see."

That statement went right over Benjamin's head.

"Either way, whether you wanted to or not, you were a hero to them. So many of those people, they said, that you were my father. Not Jake. That my mom and you, dated and I am the result. Hearing that over and over, along with getting picked on, and yes ... I've had an encounter with a bully or two."

"You fight back?"

"Yeah ... I did. Always ... you see, I was challenged because everyone said I was yours, so, some tested me to see if I was made of ... the same stuff, I guess you could say."

"Did you have to fight a lot?"

"Yeah ... quite a bit."

"Well, if and when you can avoid it, avoid it. But when and if you must, only do so in defense of your family. When it comes to them, you be mercenary. You be merciless. Never be known as a bully. Never be known as someone who talks a bunch of shit. Too much talk, gets your ass kicked. That first punch, should count. When you hit, when you punch, you punch your weight. And you don't fight with family, with friends, the way you fight on the street. Totally different."

Shawn grew quiet, thinking, tense. Benjamin stared at him stunned. Right then, he could feel and hear the difference in him. Dressed as he was in a suit, with his hair combed neatly back, he looked like your everyday business man, aside from the earring in his ear. He sat wondering what all this man was capable of. Suddenly he spoke again, saying, "I never did, thank you ... shake your hand for what you did concerning Crystal."

Benjamin wasn't sure of what he was talking about, his confusion showed with the lift of a brow, his expression questioning.

"In Madison, the night you all went out. You phoned me, told me she was on her way home in a taxi and all the details of the taxi. That surprised me. It also made my heart glad. You did good there, real good. Because nothing means more to me, that protecting them. Protecting Angela, Crystal, her mother ... Mundo."

"They're all amazing. Funny, easy to be with. We've all had a nice time together."

"That's good. I'm glad to hear it."

"Crystal seems to be a lot better now. Since, you know ... that day ... when we went looking for her, found her really upset."

"Yeah, she is. Now all I care about is that she's divorced from that weak asshole she was married to. Once that's final, she can move on in her life. Finish school, focus on her two boys."

"Oh man they are so smart, and funny! That Isaac, he's incredible man. The stuff he says; the things he catches when you least expect. He and I get along great, but Darren ... he's not so keen on me."