BOMAW Vol. 10-12 (38 page)

With that said, he turned, took hold of Shanna and made their way to their rental. Inside, she started it once both were seated and buckled up, wasting not another moment, they were out of there and on their way back to their hotel, where they would stay the night, and in the morning, return the car rental and then, a cab to the train station. Driving along they were both quiet, so much on their minds. Finally Shanna spoke up.

"Daddy?"

"Yeah?"

"Forgive me, for all I've caused, by ... not listening to you. Not, doing what you said. Forgive me, please." She started crying, because she was scared. Scared for herself. Scared for her brother, scared for her father. She knew them. She knew them well. She knew that John Sykes - would never show his face anywhere again, of that, she had no doubt. If anything ever came of it, she felt there was no one to blame but herself. The guilt, the pressure, the knowledge of it was eating her alive.

"Pull over lil'girl."

There was a McDonald's coming up, she made her way to the parking lot of it, pulled into a slot and killed the engine, her crying unstoppable now. Bart stepped from his side, making his way to her side of the car, opening the door, he pulled her out. She wrapped her arms around her father and had a hard cry; right there, in broad daylight in the McDonald's parking lot. "I'm so sorry daddy... I've never been - so - so sorry in all - all my life, as I am n-now. So scared. It hurts so bad, I just want it to go away."

"Give it some time Shanna, it'll go away. Lil'girl, life - is a gamble. You have already paid all that can be expected, from a losing hand. You, did not make him the coward that he was. That was not your doing. Shanna, everyone has a right to realize they've made a mistake and leave it. You tried to leave it, he wouldn't let you. That hangs on his head. Not yours, not your brother's, not mine. Whatever regrets I have, they are not to that coward. I am your father and I will protect you, until the day I draw my very last breath. Don't matter how old you are, or what got you in the mess, no matter. Now, you dry your eyes." He instructed, helping her to do so, his rough thumbs wiping away the tears.

"I love you so much daddy, I love you so much."

Bart kissed his daughter's forehead, hugging her again, muttering what she'd heard him say, hundreds of times, "Little girls are a blessin', t'pamper, protect and adore. Boys are for building up, t'train and harden t'men, right to the core. A father who fails his daughters, his sons, in heaven, he shall find no place, locked t'him ... is the door."

Shanna leaned back and looked up into her father's haunted eyes. She knew what thoughts went on there. He was feeling regret. He was a man torn by religion, torn by honor, ripped by war. During his healing, her brother's had suffered. In his hours of madness, to them he'd given a bit of that madness. Most to Shawn, some to Derrick, a bit to Jake. The fall out of it, had effected her sister and herself to stand in witness it all. Their mother, with her own demons, desires and regrets added what else there was of them. They were a clan unto their own code of ethics in life and law. With one draw back; they were human. Thus imperfect, making mistakes.

Shanna took a deep breath and cleared her tears. She was a McPherson. She was born of a father who was a fighter. She was born of a mother, whose lineage also came from fighters. It showed up with certainty and power, especially in her brothers, definitely in Kathy Ann; Shanna stood feeling that she was the only weak thread in the cord. Not anymore. They walked into the McDonald's, father and daughter. Shanna still thinking about their lives - realizing that they all - in their lives, fought in tiny wars of their existence. Fought in so many little battles of what it meant to survive in this day and time that was supposedly, a time of law and order. She shook her head, making her selections from the menu above. As far as she could see, which was oh so clearly now - nothing for man, or woman, had actually changed - just - rearranged to look different. Man's only advancement in life - is that he now, had mastered the art of speed. Technology made everything immediate. As well worked to camouflage and distract people from certain truths. And that was, that justice was still ... unobtainable and unjust. Therefore, the war of victory in justice - belongs only to those, willing to adjust it to their circumstances.

Yes, while Shanna knew that her thinking was radical, scandalous, it was thinking caused by getting beat to within an inch of her life and then having no protection, whatsoever - other than that offered by her family, because she was a McPherson. And in the case of other women, whatever their name be, who thought as they did, and had come to their, same conclusion. As for her, from that day forward, her resolve, her loyalty, her faith - would be in that and only that - to live and die - protecting those who carried that name - McPherson.

"Penny for your thoughts." Her father offered as they sat in a booth to eat.

Shanna smiled, bright and beaming.

"I'm thinking - how proud I am, to be who I am."

Bart smiled and asked, "And what is that?"

"Your daughter ... Shanna Eden ...
McPherson
. And nothing else matters my father, than that - being that."

"That's my lil'girl - long as we stick together - we will always come out - in the lead. My sons will be leaders, my daughters - to men who lead."

*

Madison, Wisconsin

"Mami say get what we came for and get right back home, Shawn2!" Joseph fussed. Reason he was fussing is because they walked into the mini strip mall grocery store, Pick'n'Save and who did they see? Me'Keiba and her little brothers. The moment Joseph spotted her, he knew.

"You want me to buy you something don't you? Don't you want some candy? I'll get you whatever kind you want."

Well that was different, he was a little boy, and human after all, "I want a almond joy and a whole pack a Twizzlers, a big pack." He demanded.

"You can't have both..." One brother argued with the other, getting a shopping cart. "...it's one or the other." Shawn2 bargained wishing to hurry so he could catch up with Ma'Keiba.

"I want both!" Joseph insisted.

"No, you eat all of that you'll get a belly ache, and I'll get in trouble."

"Shawn2 you always in trouble, anyway!" The five year old returned smartly, bobbing his little head of blonde hair. "I want both, I eat the candy bar now, and I'ah have my Twizzlers later. Or, I leave this store right now, and you ain't got no choice but to follow me, 'cause mami will beat you to death I come home alone."

"Ugh! Okay, okay, okay - both!"

"Now - I want my chocolate bar right now."

"Wait until we get what we came for and check out."

"No, I want - to eat - my Almond Joy, now. Get it for me."

Growling, Shawn2 rushed to the check outs, grabbed one Almond Joy from the candy rack and then went to the quick checkout and paid for it, having to wait behind two other customers to do it, tapping his foot and looking back towards the aisle wondering which one Ma'Keiba's was down, hoping that she was there to pick up a few items as he was. Marcus and Louis were gone, taking Sasha to shop for a birthday present for a friend, while they picked up a list of things their father gave them before he left for the school, leaving Shawn2 at home with his mother and little brother. Now that Joseph was temporarily happy, he pushed the cart down the front of the store, looking down each aisle searching for Ma'Keiba. A smile burst upon his face when she came out of an aisle meeting up with him. Her eyes grew wide with surprise to see him there as well.

"Hey, I saw you come in, you walk here, or your mom bring you?" He asked right away, hoping that she walked so he could walk home with her.

"We walked, got a list of stuff to get."

"Me too. How about we use just one cart, shop together?"

Once more, Ma'Keiba's eyes grew large, then shrugging she thought, "Okay, if you don't mind."

"Cool with me, we'll use yours." He decided, pushing his cart off into the distance to block one of the check out lanes. Her little brother's were staring at him and then at Joseph as Shawn2 took up the spot of pushing the cart. "We'll get the stuff on your list first, okay?" He directed.

"Okay."

"Let's see what you got here." He stood next to her looking down at her list, making her throat tighten up and her heart pound. "Tell you what, let's get them to get some of this stuff and we'll get some." In a matter of moments, he delegated each of the boys to getting something that was on the list, telling them to pick up a small carry basket each to carry the items in to bring it back to the big basket, making a game of it. They loved the idea of it, and ran off with their baskets as if in a race. "Don't break nothing!" Ma'Keiba yelled behind them afraid of what could happen with them running off like that.

"I don't know if that's a good idea. They running off like that, they could get into trouble or break something." She worried.

"They'll be fine, we'll get what's left to get on your list and find them, then you can help me with mine."

She smiled, nodding and proceeded onward with him pushing the cart beside her, she didn't know what to say to him, because she hadn't expected to see him there, in fact, she was nervous to be around him, alone even though they were in a grocery store, and both of them with their little brothers.

"You glad school is out?"

"Kind'ah, there's not as much to do during the summer, I don't mind school."

"I bet you get good grades and everything huh?"

"Yeah, sometimes. I've gotten bad grades too." She admitted.

"Like what? You ever get a 'D'?"

"No, but I've gotten a 'C' - in English, I hate English, science is my favorite class, what's yours?"

"Gym." He admitted with a grin.

"That's not a real class, all you do is play in Gym. Besides Gym, what's your favorite class?"

Rolling his head up to the right with his eyes squinting his asked, "Let me think, ohhh I would say science like you."

"You just said that cause I said it was mine." She shook her head, checking her list, "I gotta get this stuff on my list and get home. My mama don't play that."

"Okay, I'll help you get yours, you can help me get mine."

"In that case, quit talking and let's get to shopping."

And they did, rushing around the store, grabbing items off of the shelf, laughing and having a good time, chasing Joseph and her little brother's who tossed items in the basket and then ran through the store for all the stuff on
his
list. People stared at them, shaking their heads at them as they barreled through one aisle and then the next, every now and then, having to say, "Excuse me..." for banging into someone's cart. They had a good time. At the check out, they had to sort out their items on the belt, putting one of the dividers between their groceries. Joseph shared his Twizzlers with her little brothers while Shawn2 bagged up first her items and then his own, after paying. They all left out of the store, happy and smiling. Shawn2 and Joseph helping her by carrying some of her groceries. All five were all grins until they stepped out of the store to see Derrick sitting in the van outside of the store. He'd come to test the van for overheating at the same time looking for his boys to give a ride home from the store.

Seeing who they were with, he figured it was a good thing he'd come when he did.

"Dad?"

With an arched brow, Derrick looked from his sons to Ma'Keiba. "Come on, might as well put your things in here as well, so I can give you a ride home."

She and Shawn2 looked at each other as if they were guilty of a no no. "It's okay Mr. McPherson, we can walk home."

"No way are you walking home. Shawn, put those bags in and hers as well, climb in boys, Ma'Keiba."

All climbed in, Shawn2 was the last, slamming the door behind them and was the last to take a seat and buckle up.

Derrick kept glancing at his son in the back seat, sitting with Ma'Keiba's little brother's beside him. He had Ma'Keiba sitting shotgun from him.

"Ma'Keiba..." Derrick called her name gently.

"Yes sir, Mr. McPherson?"

"Will you do me a big favor?" He asked her.

"Yes sir, if I can." She returned.

Derrick stopped at the light, looked at the thermostat gage on the dashboard, noticing that the van was indeed starting to run hot, once he took them home and dropped them off, he would have to take it in. "Ma'Keiba, I want you to promise me something. And because of the type of young lady I know you are, the way your parents have raised you, I'm fully confident you're going to keep this promise to me."

"Yes sir, what is that?"

"I want you to promise me right here and now, that you'll never allow yourself to be alone with that son of mine. And I mean, alone as in a way that's not decent for good girls. Since I know you're a good girl, I'm not asking anything you can't deliver, can you promise me that, what I've just asked of you? You know what I mean, don't you?"

Ma'Keiba blushed.

Shawn2 turned red, but dare not say a word.

"Well, do you know what I mean?" He asked again.

"Yes sir, I know what you mean."