BOMAW Vol. 10-12 (53 page)

"Honey when I sent you your things, I did keep some things back, so that when you visited, like now, you'd have what you needed. Why don't we go up and look at your room?"

"Take my word for it, you'll love it." Jeremiah added, feeling for the look on Deidre's face. She was trying so hard and hoping.

"Maybe we can look at it later." She answered.

Sylvia stood, walking to Angela, "Come on, I'll go with you - let's see your room."

Angela wilted, afraid but stood anyway since Sylvia asked her to, leaning down Sylvia whispered in her ear, "Don't hurt her feelings Angela, she loves you."

"I know."

"Well come on, let's make the best of this visit."

With all her might, Deidre fought back bursting into tears. She knew that her daughter had always preferred her father over her because they'd been close from birth. It's as if he'd given birth to her instead of the other way around. He'd always been a natural from the moment she came into the world, he couldn't wait to hold her. Whereas she'd been scared to death to and now, Sylvia. She swallowed back her feelings, put forth a smile and led the way up the stairs.

Outside, walking the grounds, "Wow - it must be nice, lifestyle of the rich and famous." Crystal murmured smiling.

"Tell me about it. My folks live on a lot of land no bigger than that corner of this section of her grounds, in the woods."

"It must have been nice even so." Crystal added softly keeping in gentle step next to him as the boys ran in circles loving it.

"Quincy made it nice. No matter what he was feeling at the end of the day, he made time for us. Man, he would come home from work, pull us, kicking and screaming from in front of the TV and take us out into the woods to explore. We would always fight it, didn't see what could be so interesting out in the woods. But I guarantee you, within 15 minutes of us being out there, he'd have our attention and interest deep into it."

"Ohhh, I would have loved such a life. We weren't allowed to go outside where I grew up. Most of my young life was spent with my mother, at school and then in the house at home. From time to time we'd go to my grandparents, the Payne's - we could go outside then, but as soon as my mother was off of work, she'd come to pick us up. She didn't trust us anywhere but at Sheila's."

"I like her, she's cool."

"Oh man, now at her house, we always had a blast. Vivian would come over, and she would always come outside jumping rope with us, playing hop scotch, hide and go seek. She would walk us to the corner store so we could buy junk food - laughing and talking to us like the best big sister ever."

"Wow, you guys go way back then."

"Oh yeah, my mom, Sheila and Vivian, the best of friends, even though Vivian is quite a bit younger than them; she was always around at Sheila's. I loved going to Sheila's but I loved it even more when we arrived to see Vivian there, because she always played with us. Mundo had Robert to play with, and I had Vivian."

"Can you believe it, she's marrying my father."

"I know, it just blows me away, the one named Jake." She amended and they both laughed.

"What can I say, your typical red neck tale - a chapter from, I am my own grandpa."

Crystal guffawed until her stomach hurt.

"For real man, is that crazy or what?"

"Just means us misfits fit."

Ben looked at her, winked and agreed, "Yeah, we do, like a glove."

"That's why we're such good friends, we click." She simpered adding.

"Friends huh? Yeah, okay ... friends." He grumbled with reluctant acceptance.

"Ah come on Ben, I like having you for a friend, I don't want that to ever end."

"Me either. So tell me my friend, think we'll ever be this rich, famous?"

"I don't know if I'd ever wanna be, I mean - don't get me wrong, I wouldn't mind being self-sufficient you know, but, to be rich? What kind of challenges would life hold if you already had everything you ever wanted?" She offered in thought.

"I suppose I'm with you on that, takes away the adventure doesn't it?"

"I think so, of course not everyone feels that way, but I do."

"Well, on the other side of that, I happen to know for me, there will always be something I'll want and ... can't have." He glanced at her, his meaning clear. "Yet, there's something in knowing that, that makes you want it all that much more."

"That's a man thing." She responded trying to wiggle out of it subtly.

"And I'm a man Crystal..." He turned before her walking slowly backwards, "... I'm not perfect, I make mistakes - but - I'm a man, what more can I say?" He was gazing straight into her eyes. "Let's have an adventure together Crystal, let's do something that we'll always remember together."

"What?" She stopped to ask in a tone that warned him to be careful.

"Come on, what's up with that tone? I'm not asking what you think, I already know you're not that way, I was considering something else."

"Okay, what?" She posed the question again, this time with a smile.

"I've been told from a reliable source, that you've been offered tickets to a ball, is that so?"

Crystal smiled, "As a matter of fact, I was."

"I see, so ah, what do you think? May I be so bold madam, to ask, if you would be so generous, as to allow me the privilege, of escorting you to the ball? Just so you know, I would be honored, if you would."

Crystal smiled, touched, and before she could say another word, Isaac came barrelling up behind Ben, charging right into the back of his knees, buckling them and down he went rolling off to the side not to fall on Isaac. "Whoa!" He bellowed laughing, taken by surprise, he grabbed him, lifting him into the air. "What a tackle! We've got a football player in the making, defensive tackle, coming up for sure!" He crowed with praise tickling the squirming child, who wiggled with uncontrollable laughter. Darren caught up to his brother and dived onto Ben's stomach yelling, "My Ben!" Making him shout in laughter as he wrestled with them on the ground. "Tackle me will you! You set me up Darren - didn't you, had it planned all along! Get'em outside, run off, mom is in position to distract him, then we get'em!"

The sounds of their laughter was all that could be heard as Darren squealed with tears in his eyes, "Uh emmm, nooo, no!" He cried out so weak he rolled on the ground trying to escape Ben's tickling him.

"Ben - tackle my mama!"

"No!" Crystal yelled leaning down with her hands out to ward off Ben as he rolled forward coming to his feet in one athletic move, eyes on Crystal, both boys beside him in the crouched position, hands up like claws, making growling noises at their mother.

"Now Ben! Stop it! Isaac - Darren, cut it out!" She squealed with nervous laughter, wanting to turn and run but was too scared to turn her back on him.

"Better talk to the boys." Ben warned.

"Isaac! Call'em off!"

"Tackle'er now Ben!" Isaac roared with a growling face.

"Nooo!" Crystal screamed just as Ben launched himself at her, lifting her off of her feet to fold over his shoulder, hanging down his back, laughing and begging to be let down. Ben ignored her, "Now what Isaac?" He asked instead.

"Ya'did it wrong Ben, you s'pose to tackl'er to the ground like I did you."

"Benjamin Caesar McPherson! Put me down!" She insisted over them.

"But she's a girl Isaac, you can't tackle a girl like that, it'll make her cry. Girls are all delicate and stuff - their not made like us men."

"Well then, what'cha gonna do with'er?"

"Hang on a minute little man, she's making an awful racket ain't she?" And then to Crystal, "Hey you, you want down?"

"Yes." She laughed.

"If I remember correctly, I posed a particular question to you, something to do with a ball, me escorting you."

"Ben, the bloods rushing to my head, I'm gonna get a headache." She whined.

"What's my answer? Hurry up, I'll set you down."

"I accept, I accept! Yes, you can escort me."

"Good girl. See Isaac, she wants down, girls ... they just can't take it."

"Put'er down then." He instructed shaking his little head.

Ben leaned forward as she straightened up, but took advantage of her being so close and stood brushing his body along the front of hers, slowly, very reluctant to release her. Both of their hearts were pounding.

"I wish you wouldn't do ... stuff like that." She cautioned him, breathless - her heart was pounding crazy in her chest.

"See, there's a perfect example of me ... being imperfect, making mistakes - acting like a - man, wanting something, I can't have. What can I say, I couldn't resist." He gently released her backing away. The moment the space opened up, Darren was there to be picked up. Automatically, Ben lifted him into his arms, his eyes still on his mother's.

"Ben? You like my mama?" Isaac asked, standing beside them, looking from one to the other.

Very honest, he answered, "Yes, I like your mama very much, she's a very nice lady."

"Yeah, she is. You gonna kiss'er?"

"Isaac!" Crystal squealed.

Ben smiled, "No, she won't let me."

"Oh." Isaac murmured and then asked, "Ben, how come you always pick Darren up and not me?"

Ben could swear he detected a deeper hue to Crystal's skin, she was obviously blushing deep red. He turned from her to Isaac, answering his question, "Ahhh, it's just because he's little, the baby. You're a big boy though, but you know what, there's room on my back." He offered kneeling down, "Climb on board."

"Isaac, Ben, that's too much, Darren... come to mama." Crystal bent to take him from Ben.

"No!"

"Hey, leave'em - they're fine. Get a good grip Isaac."

"Okay, got a good grip." He called after climbing onto Ben's back wrapping his arms around his neck. Ben stood then with both boys and looked at Crystal, "See, they're fine. You jealous - wanna climb on board too?" He teased.

Crystal blushed once more shaking her head, an impish grin crossed her features. He could tell she was dying to come back with a witty reply, but she knew better, just seeing her exercise such self-control had him in stitches, "Hmmm, that's right - you know better all ready not to dual swords with me - don'cha?"

Her head did a rotation, "Not because I'm afraid."

"Yeah you are, and with good reason, smart girl."

"You don't scare me Mr. McPherson."

"No, I don't. I never want to either - but ah, I do make you shiver - don't I?"

"Stop it Ben, if you're gonna keep on like this - I'm going back to the house."

"Okay, okay, okay, I'll behave, don't leave - I like having you and the boys all to myself like this. From now on, I'm your Mr. Perfect gentlemen, you have my word."

"Mama what did Ben do?" Isaac wondered.

"Nothing baby, nothing at all."

"Then why you wanna go back to the house, I rather be wit' Ben, any day, huh Darren."

"Yeah!" He answered and then kissed Ben on the cheek. "My Ben!"

"He's not just your Ben Darren, he's my Ben too, mama's Ben, all our Ben."

Once more his words brought a clog to Ben's throat, needing to change the subject - he challenged the boys. "Think she's got frogs in this great big ol'garden somewhere?"

"Yeah! I bet there is!" Isaac eyes grew huge.

"I had my very own frog that grew from a tadpole." Ben told him, drawing away from Crystal, he immersed himself into the boys.

"You did? You still got it?"

"Nope, I set him free a long time ago. You ever have your own frog?" He asked them.

"No, I never haved no frog!"

"No? You're kidding me! Why, that just makes no sense, every little boy needs to have a frog, shoot, at least once. You should'ah had at least two by now."

"Nope, I never had one, Ben."

"Well we're gonna have to fix that, let's go see if we can find one." He suggested so enthusiastically, Crystal felt her stomach tighten, moisture coated her eyes. He set the boys down so they could take off before him. He turned to her, "You'll have to excuse me now, the boys need me." He gave her a gentle salute and was off after them. Talking to them cheerfully, so full of excitement and enthusiasm as if what they were doing, was what he liked doing most. With so many shaded areas, trees, two small ponds, with the stretch of the garden, they were determined to find one somewhere.

Crystal stayed back, following slowly. Content to listen to them in the distance. She couldn't believe how much in love with Ben her boys were. Once more she found herself comparing him to Victor. Granted, the boys were young, and they'd been busy with working, school and life - however he'd never taken the lead in seeing to their fun. He'd been a father out of obligation it seemed, not necessarily out of joy and gladness. He loved them, but that she realized was fuelled with pride as well being a man of responsibility. Yet, he didn't really have it in him to romp and play with them. There was never any roughhousing with them as Ben did. He'd never taken one up and encouraged her to walk with him. Crystal shook her head feeling once more disloyal to him - she knew she had no business comparing them, they were two totally different people, raised differently. She knew it really wasn't Victor's fault that he could barely handle his boys, in fact seemed at a loss as to what to do with them. When they were together, he would groan if she were going shopping and not taking them. One reason, they would have a crying fit for being left at home with him. Only time either of them were happy about being left is when Mundo was home. If he was not in, Victor wanted Crystal to take the boys with her. Sometimes she would, other times she would refuse. On those times when she refused, she would come home to find the house a wreck, the boys not yet bathed and dressed, and instead of cooking them something healthy to eat, he'd take them to the store in their pajamas walking down the road like that, getting them junk food to keep them happy.

She remembered coming in the door and he would be stretched out on the floor, on his stomach sleeping, with them sitting on his back watching TV - faces full of chocolate and other junk food traces, stains, wrappers, bags, food all over the floor along with their toys. In the kitchen, the refrigerator wide open, juice carton sitting on the floor in front of it, milk spilled out and spreading across the floor from the gallon jug. The kitchen table, bowls of cereal and more spills. She'd step over him, looking at the house, the boys cheering that she was home and before she knew it, an argument would begin. Once more Crystal shook her head, thinking about Victor. Even so, with all of that going on, she had wanted them to make it. She had wanted her marriage to work. She could see him so clearly and realized even now - there was still a bit left in her heart for him, yet - there was something happening there ... conflict. Conflict because, Ben ... Ben was shoving him out with a determination that shook Crystal, simply put, he was a dream come true. Problem, her life and the path of it never led to dreams, it usually, more often than not, lead to nightmares. With that ringing reality, she made up her mind, to keep things as it was, a friendship between them, granted, one that was growing steadily deeper, but - friends just the same.