Breaking Skin (34 page)

Cole releases him and looks over his shoulder at me. “Come on. He’s wasting our time.”

“Wait a minute.” I put a hand on Cole’s arm and look at Ben again. “If you’re telling the truth, how did you meet my sister? I don’t understand how you could even know her.”

Cole gives me an incredulous look because I’m not dismissing Ben’s explanation. I can’t, not when I’m noticing more traits about him that remind me of Langley, like the way his hairline starts low on his forehead and the shape of his lips.

“We met when she came looking for Ron,” he says.

“My father? She never went looking for him. She wouldn’t.” I shake my head and realize Cole’s right. He’s wasting our time.

Ben raises his hand and points at me. “You never came but she did. She was by a few times that summer, but Ron didn’t want to see her. He made my mother send her away. But she kept coming back.”

I don’t want to believe him, but I can’t be certain he’s lying. There’s a part of Renee I knew and another part I never could. It’s that part I doubt. That part could have stolen Alan Lamont’s money or went looking for our father after he left.

Ben must see how conflicted I am because he continues explaining. “One night, Renee came by and I was the only one there. We started talking and I let her come inside. One thing led to another . . .”

He trails off and lets a smug smile imply the rest. A queasy lump forms in my stomach.

“We saw each other a few times after that, but then things just petered out. Until she showed up one day and told me she was pregnant. I thought she was kidding. I couldn’t be a father. Especially not to her kid. If Ron ever found out . . .” He pauses and rubs the back of his neck. “Ron was the father I never had. He was going to pay for me to go to college. I couldn’t disappoint him like that. But things are different now. Ron is gone, and my mother passed away recently. My daughter is the only family I have left. Can you tell me her name?”

I don’t respond. I know nothing about him or if he’s dangerous or not, and I have no sympathy for him or his story. All I know is he abandoned Renee and now he’s trying to terrify her. Why? As punishment for not letting him see Langley?

“We’re not doing this,” Cole says. “You played a horrible trick on a vulnerable woman. The reason doesn’t matter.”

“He’s right,” I say to Ben. “You have to stop. You can’t stand out here in the woods anymore and you can’t leave pictures on the doorstep.”

“Now that we know who you are,” Cole says, “if you don’t stop this bullshit, I promise you won’t like the consequences.”

Ben glares at Cole and me. “I can go to court and demand a paternity test.”

“Then do it,” I say. “That would certainly be more reasonable than what you’ve been doing.”

A deep scowl etches into his face. “I just want to see my daughter.”

“Then get a lawyer, because you’re not getting within ten feet of her without a court order.”

Ben’s hands go to his hips. He squints at Cole before looking back at me, and as his jaw works, I can see the anger brewing behind his eyes. At my side, Siegfried senses it too and issues a low, menacing growl.

Ben’s eyes narrow on Siegfried before he shakes his head and throws his hands down in surrender. “Your father was right about you and your sister. You’re a couple of selfish bitches who don’t care about anyone but yourself.”

Beside me, Cole tenses, and I grab his arm to hold him back as Ben turns away from us and walks into the woods in the other direction, away from Renee’s house. When Siegfried moves to follow, I grab his collar. A few moments later, the sound of Ben’s feet crunching through leaves fades.

Cole looks down at Siegfried. “I know how you feel, buddy. I’d like another shot at him too.”

“Langley looks so much like him. He could be telling the truth.” I release a shaky breath and feel the way my body trembles from leftover adrenaline.

“Christ, Nikki. You’re not wearing any shoes.”

We both look down at my white socks and I wiggle my toes. The underbrush is a soft bed of leaves. My feet are fine, but Cole doesn’t agree. He mutters something before he lifts me in his arms, and I squeak in surprise.

“I can walk,” I say in protest.

He doesn’t bother responding as he carries me back the way we came. Siegfried trots beside us.

“I can’t believe you went after him alone with no shoes on your feet. What the hell were you thinking?”

I frown at his tone. “That I had to get to him before he disappeared.”

“What if he was dangerous?”

“He wasn’t.”

“You didn’t fucking know that. We still don’t know that.”

He’s angry because he was worried about me. It’s sweet. “How’s your headache?”

“It’s gone,” he grumbles.

“Cole?” I press my hand to his cheek to make him look at me. “Tell me the truth.”

His expression softens. “The pain is gone. Thank you for letting me stay with you last night.”

I smile at him, but it fades quickly. “That’s why Renee kept the identity of Renee’s father a secret. She was probably ashamed and embarrassed. I have to tell her it was Ben in the woods and that he left the photograph. If she knows the truth, maybe she’ll come home.”

“If he’s the reason she left.”

“It has to be him. Either he scared her away by pretending to be my father, or the fact that he wanted to see Langley made her feel like she had to leave.”

“Nikki, neither of those reasons say anything good about her state of mind.”

“I know.” I grip his shirt and rest my head on his shoulder as Cole navigates through the brush. Once he reaches the road, Siegfried runs ahead of us toward the house.

“Could you believe Siegfried?” I ask. “I didn’t think he had it in him. You weren’t so bad yourself. I’m glad you were here, Cole.”

He looks at me and the storm clouds that were brewing in his eyes for Ben are nowhere to be found now. “We make a good team.”

I smile. “We slay dragons.”

Cole presses a kiss to my forehead. “Yes, we do, sweetheart.”

I leave a message on Renee’s voice mail later that day to tell her about Ben. I explain everything I know about him, and then I make sure she understands that I’m not judging her. I love her and only want to help her. It’s the truth, but I’m also confused and afraid for her, and disheartened by all the secrets between us. When I hang up, I have real hope that Renee will call back this time. If she’s listening to her messages, maybe this one will make the difference.

Before he leaves, Cole reminds me to call Nadia. He put a reminder in his phone, along with all his other reminders and appointments for the day, so he’d remember to tell me. Something about that gesture tugs at my heart, the fact that he cared enough to do that. With all the sweet things he says to me and the affection he shows, for some reason this chokes me up.

I want to make some calls, but since this is Sunday, I have to wait. But the first thing I do the next morning is call Nadia. As I give her the news about my knee, she’s eerily quiet. But once I finish, she’s all business as she rattles off the name of a doctor she thinks I should see and tells me exactly where in the city I should do my rehab. She says that when I’m ready, I can dance for her, and we’ll see where we are.

It wasn’t exactly a warm and fuzzy conversation because Nadia isn’t that type of person. But it was an encouraging phone call. She invited me to dance for her once I recover. She’s giving me a chance. I can’t ask for more than that.

If I get the surgery in the next few weeks, I should complete my rehab just before my contract expires. I waste no time taking the first appointment I can get with Nadia’s doctor in San Francisco for three weeks from now. Whether Renee is home or not, I’ll go ahead with the surgery.

Once that’s done, I feel a sense of relief. I text Cole to fill him in, and he offers to drive me back and forth and take care of me those first few days after the surgery. He also says he’ll drive Langley wherever she needs to go and handle everything that needs handling. Rather than argue, I say thank you and wonder if he knows how deeply I’ve come to care about him.

Over the next two weeks, I continually check my phone, but Renee doesn’t call. There’s no word from her, and I realize there’s nothing I can do or say that is going to change that. I feel helpless, completely ineffectual, lost in a way but also found because every chance we get, Cole and I are together. I’m in his bed every afternoon while Langley’s at school. When we leave the bedroom, we go for walks, have long conversations sitting outside on his deck, and do ordinary things that feel extraordinary because we’re doing them together.

One thing we don’t do is show our affection in front of Langley. Cole hasn’t stayed overnight again at the house, and I haven’t told Langley anything about our developing relationship. It’s not about keeping secrets. It’s about shielding her from something that may upset or confuse her. Especially since she misses her mother more every day, and her mood sinks a little lower.

My own mood ping-pongs between guilty highs and disquieting lows. I watch for Ben, staring at those woods and thankfully seeing no sign of him. I worry about Renee and my imagination runs wild with terrible possibilities, but still I get up and move through the day.

We’re all living in an uneasy state of limbo, trying to stay dry while we stand in a rainstorm, and it’s fraying our nerves.

It’s the start of my sixth week here when Cole knocks on the back door with his phone in his hand.

Smiling, I pull the door open.

“I’ve got news,” he announces as he steps inside and looks around. “Is Langley at school?”

I nod, holding my breath.

He puts his phone away as his gaze locks on mine. “The detective found Renee.”

My pulse rate skyrockets. “Where?”

“In a rehab facility.”

“Rehab?” I push the word out on a strangled breath. “How did she end up in rehab?”

He presses his lips together as worry furrows his brow. “She was found passed out in a park. She had no ID and someone, they think it was a volunteer from a nearby church, brought her in.”

“Passed out in a park?” I shiver as I think about all the things that could have happened to her.

“When she woke up, she told them her name was Margot Fonteyn. So that’s what she was listed under, but she put her real Social Security number on one of the intake forms, which is how the detective finally tracked her down.”

“Margot Fonteyn?” That’s so like Renee.

Cole eyes me curiously.

“She’s a famous ballerina.” My heart races as I explain. We’ve finally found Renee.

“Except for that first week when she was with Alan, she’s been in rehab this whole time.”

“Where is it?” I ask.

“In the city. It’s a free state-run facility. Not exactly the Ritz.”

“I have to see her. Can you watch Langley?”

He holds his hand up. “It’s a thirty-day program. She gets out in two days. We can go see her then and bring her back home with us. I’ll get Lily to watch the kids again.”

I shake my head. “I have to go myself. We can’t show up there together.”

He tilts his head and narrows his eyes slightly.

I swallow. “This isn’t about us, Cole. She’s my sister. I don’t want to risk upsetting her. Not on her first day out.”

“She gets out the day of your surgery,” he says.

“I’ll reschedule it.”

Cole frowns, obviously not liking that idea, but he must know I’m not going to let Renee come out of rehab and not be there for her.

He sighs his resignation, but his eyes are wary and tinged with uncertainty. “Go get your sister and bring her home. Once she’s back, things are going to change. We should talk. Make some plans.”

Plans
. I’d like the idea of Cole and me having plans. I nod, on the verge of tears because of the relief I feel.

“Thank you for everything you’ve done for us.”

Cole responds by kissing me, and then he presses his forehead to mine and stays there, mingling our breath. I feel a tension in him that hasn’t been there before, and I understand it because I feel it too. Beneath all my relief is apprehension.

Renee is coming home.