Breathless (The Breathe Series) (13 page)

So that’s what’s happening in my life at the moment. I am trying desperately to believe I deserve this happiness but I just miss you two so much. I am taking care of Mr Davenport. I am making sure that he is eating and taking care of himself. All I need to do now is find him a good woman. We are taking care of each other so you don’t have to worry about that. He has been amazing with the news of my pregnancy.

So, Mum and Dad, another year has passed where you aren’t with me but please know that forever you will be in my heart and every day I think of you.

I will love and miss you forever.

Savannah.

The tightness in my chest made everything so real. Her sobs filled the air as she dropped the letter to the floor. This beautiful, incredible, amazing woman sitting on my lap had just told me all of her fears about us, and she had told me all of her love for me. I felt like I had been punched in the face and kicked in the guts.

Choking out words, I twisted her in my lap so she was facing me. “What can I do, Sav? Tell me what I can do.”

She looked up at me, and a look of contentment swept over her face. “You can let me make you a toasted vegemite and cheese sandwich like Dad would make me. You can take a bath with me, you can kiss me, and you can love me. That’s all I need.”

“I think I can do that. Let me run our bath while you make the sandwiches. I am a little scared though.” I laughed softly, and she rolled her eyes as she stood and pulled me up with her.

“You will be having vegemite toast every morning for breakfast from now on. Guaranteed.”

“Now, Sav, that’s taking things a little too far.” I stood in front of her as my eyes swept over her. We had a silent connection and she nodded. She was showing me that she was okay.

“You just wait.” She kissed me lightly and moved towards the kitchen. “You’ll be begging me.”

“You don’t have to make me sandwiches to make me beg. I thought you knew me.” I winked at her and left her laughing as I walked towards the bathroom. I stopped by the door and turned to look at her. She stood by the counter, looking off in the distance, her mind a million miles away but still with a smile on her face.

That girl was truly something else.

But she was also the girl I was leaving tomorrow.

Reality was
a bitch. A bitch that was making me leave the confines of Savannah. The text message with my flight details reminding me of my impending departure had woken me up from my sex-induced coma and crashed me back to reality with a hard thud.

This trip had been exactly what I’d needed. It cemented in me that I could do this. Savannah and I could do this. We were going to be parents, and for the first time since she’d told me, I wasn’t freaking out. I had moved on from the panic that took over me and the fear that I would be like my father. The dread of turning in to him escaped me the moment I’d decided I needed to face him. I needed answers. I needed to hear from him why he’d chosen to do this, why he had left Tanzi, Mom, and me. I needed to know so I would never do it to my kid, so I would never do it to Sav.

The thought of Jellybean, the thought that I was going to become a father, the thought that Sav and I were ready for the next step in our relationship excited me. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. I was, no lie, going to be the best dad in the world to my kid and the best partner to the most gorgeous and amazing girl I knew.

“What’s Chelsea’s surname?” Sav’s voice rang through the hotel room. I stilled at the sound of her name, the razor that I was holding freezing near my throat. My eyes glanced into the mirror and back into the room, where Sav was looking down at her phone while sitting cross-legged on the bed with just a sheet wrapped around her body.

“Why?”

“Just answer the question, Tate.” The sound of frustration in her voice was evident. I was testing her patience.

I sighed loudly and placed the razor on the bathroom sink. “Davison. Her last name is Davison.”

“Well why the fuck is she attempting to contact me?” Her words were strained and filled with insecurities.

“What are you talking about?” Hurrying out of the bathroom, I took a seat beside her and spun her around to face me. My eyes were met with Sav’s empty ones. Hesitation was looking back at me, but more heartbreakingly, lack of trust stared me in the face.

“This, Tate. I am talking about this.” She pushed her phone towards me and her face was thunder dark as anger soared through her body. I grabbed the phone and looked down at an open message from Mr. Davenport.

Mr. Davenport: Sav, someone by the name of Chelsea Davison keeps calling for you and demanding to know where you are staying in New York. Who the fuck is she and do I need to contact security?

I read the message over again, trying to let it sink in. Why would Chelsea be trying to contact Sav? I thought back to the messages that Chelsea had sent me, the ones that I had left unanswered. I still hadn’t told Sav that she had been trying to contact me. I tore my eyes from the screen to look at Savannah. The tears in her eyes were evident. The color had drained from her face and the look she was giving me was the same look from the night when Chelsea was at Red Velvet, the night I broke Savs heart because of my fucked up insecurities.

“Sav, I haven’t seen Chelsea since the other night.”

“Well why is she trying to get in contact with me?” Her voice sounded like a little girl’s, the confident, sassy Sav nowhere to be found. It crushed me.

“I don’t know.” I stood from the bed and ran my hands through my hair as my anger levels rose. “I have no idea what goes through her head. I don’t even know how she knows where you work, let alone how to contact you. It pisses me off.”

I paced, trying desperately to dissipate the anger swimming through every vein in my body. I had been with some crazy girls in the past, but Chelsea took the cake. What had meant to be a casual, no-strings-attached fuck buddy turned into a stalker who kept turning up when I least expected it, claiming that she was in the same city, let alone the same hotel, as me. Of course I’d get drunk and she’d take me back to her room. It had been a constant cycle and I couldn’t keep my dick in my pants. But I could now.

“Tate! Sit down.” Sav’s voice grasped me from my thoughts. I looked at her with wide eyes and found her tear-threatened eyes now full of concern. “Tate, please.”

I grabbed the hand that she was holding out to me and she pulled me to sit beside her on the bed before she crawled onto my lap. Her arms wrapped around my neck securing my body against hers.

“If you say it’s nothing then it’s nothing. I can’t help but feel threatened by her though. Seriously, my boyfriend’s fuck buddy was a lingerie model. That shit is hard to get your head around.”

I laughed.

I laughed until I had tears running down my cheeks, until my stomach was clenching, and until I could barely breathe. It probably wasn’t the best way to react to my girlfriend telling me about her insecurities but I couldn’t help it.

Savannah was not impressed. Her eyes narrowed and her mouth became taut.

“I’m sorry, but the fact that you are even comparing yourself to her is the funniest thing I’ve heard. Seriously, Sav, you crack me up.” I gasped, in a feeble attempt to get my breathing in check and my laughing under control.

She pouted. “This is not funny.”

“Sav, you are the universe compared to her. She is nothing like you. Please don’t even compare yourself to her. Do I need to take a photo of you in your cute little panties and bra to prove a point? I jerk off to the thought of you in lingerie. You don’t realize how sexy you are?”

“Even with my little belly?”

“That makes you even sexier.”

“How long have we got till you leave?” Her eyes flashed dark as she slowly released the sheet from around her body. My eyes trailed over her naked frame and I felt my body come alive. “I’ve got something that I want you to take to LA.”

“Really?”

“Mmm.”

She pressed her body firmly against mine. I swallowed hard as the green eyes that constantly undid me looked at me with lust. Her hands ran up my chest and my muscles constricted under her touch.

Her lips crushed onto mine with such force that my breath was stolen from my lungs. My arms snaked themselves around her waist, pulling her to me. I needed to remember this; I needed to memorize every stroke of her tongue, every beat of her heart against me and every little noise that came out of her. Her tongue swept over the length of my bottom lip, demanding entrance. I couldn’t ever refuse her. My lips parted with a sigh and her tongue swam in. There was softness about this kiss that I needed. I pressed into her with every movement of her tongue, my body aching for her like no one else. Her fingers ran up the back of my head, slicing through my hair and causing shivers to run down my spine. I was completely and utterly under her control.

“Sav, you need to stop, otherwise I am pushing you against that window and fucking you in full view of thousands of people.” I growled, pulling her bottom lip between my teeth.

Her face flushed and reluctantly released me from her grasp. “Just reminding you that this little guy is mine.” She tapped my highly reactive cock and smirked.

“Little?” I scoffed.

Winking, Sav pushed away from me and removed herself from my lap, standing in all her naked glory before me. “There’s my arrogant boyfriend.”

“You like torturing me don’t you? Cover yourself woman, I am seconds away from fucking you so hard you’ll be seeing stars. If I miss my plane and you can deal with the wrath of Ali. I think she is a little stressed at running Red Velvet.” My eyes scanned the length of her body, every inch of her perfection. Seriously she was either going to fuck me to death or torment me to death. “Now your arrogant and highly turned on boyfriend is going to take a shower.”

Walking
out of the bathroom, freshly showered and slightly less turned on I wrapped the towel tightly around my waist and went in search of my clothes. Fuck it I didn’t want to leave Savannah today. My thoughts ran rampant of ways I could stay in New York and still run Red Velvet in Los Angeles, I was the boss so I could do whatever the hell I wanted. With a smile plastered on my face I stepped into the living area and immediately I felt the air chill and stiffen around me. Something wasn’t right. My eyes darted furiously around every corner in anxiety to find Sav but I found the devil itself. Chelsea.

“What the fuck are you doing here?”

Chelsea and Blake stood towards the front door of the hotel room, Chelsea with a smirk the size of the Grand Canyon on her face and Blake with a look of uncomfortableness. The sense of unease that gripped my body was crippling. Firstly how did they get in here and secondly why were they here? Ripping my eyes away from them, I searched for Sav. This couldn’t be happening. My heart twisted and contorted in my chest at the look on her face when my eyes locked with hers.

She marched towards me with a face full of thunder, her eyes red and raw from crying. “When were you going to tell me?” She sobbed through gritted teeth.

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” I tried to grab her hands but she didn’t give me a chance. The sting of her palm slamming against my cheek roared through my body.

“The fact that I had to find out from
her
makes it even worse
.”

“Baby, I have no idea what you are talking about. Talk to me Sav.”

“I can’t handle this again Tate, I can’t.” She stepped towards me looking for comfort but then ripped herself away from me just as quickly as reality struck her.

“Can’t handle what?” I fumed.” What has she said to you? Blake, what the fuck is going on?”

“I tried to warn you Tate. I tried to stop this.” Blake shook his head. His eyes darted from mine and landed on Sav.

“Would you two just shut up?” Chelsea finally spoke. “Blake you wouldn’t have said a word. You know I would have spilt your secrets just as quickly as you come.”

“You need to shut the fuck up Chelsea. I don’t know what fucked up web of lies you are spinning but Sav will not believe you.”

“She already has Tate.”

Sav’s gasp ignited the air around me and the feeling of her moving away from me crushed what was left of my quickly shattering heart. My eyes followed Sav’s every movement. Like a Hollywood movie in slow motion I watched my nightmare unfolding in front of me. Sav moved quickly across the room, seeking comfort in Blake’s arms, his eyes hooded at me as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close to his body.

“Savannah, what the hell is going on? Speak to me,” I pleaded, storming across the room to stand in front of her. Her eyes drove into mine. They were empty pits of what only hours ago had been full of love. My soul felt depleted. I could already feel the wall building between us, a wall being built on the word of Chelsea. Sav’s face no longer showed any emotion to me, her eyes no longer showed the intensity of our relationship. The emptiness of her eyes was obliterating.

“I had to tell her, Tate. She is carrying your child, so she deserves to know that you are still fucking me. She told me you have been denying speaking with me but she knows everything now.” Chelsea’s smug face looked at me like she had just won the lottery. Ripping my gaze from Sav’s, I pierced into the eyes of Chelsea. This was a new fucking low. What could she have possibly said or done to make Sav react like this?

“What did you tell her, Chelsea? What possible lies have you spat? Sav, don’t believe her. Don’t believe anything she says.”

“She has a video, Tate. Videos don’t lie,” Sav whimpered, her face knotted with pain.

My legs tensed beneath me, my breath caught in my throat. “A video?” I questioned, collapsing onto the couch in the centre of the room. “Show me.” I glared at Chelsea. The look of evil on her face didn’t falter as she sat beside me and handed me her phone.

Breathing in deeply, I pressed play and my eyes focused on the screen. The video began and there I was, on full display. There was no denying that the person I was watching was me. I was on my back with Chelsea hovering over me. We were naked, sweaty and breathing heavily. Her head dipped as she took me with her mouth while my hand pulled on her hair. What the fuck was this? I slapped my palm on the screen, begging for the atrocity to end. My mind was completely and utterly blown. This couldn’t be happening. When had she filmed us having sex? That’s one thing I would never ever do. She had done this without me knowing. This wasn’t new footage—this wasn’t even New York. I threw the phone at Chelsea and rose to my feet and rushed towards Sav.

“Sav, that’s not new. Believe me, I would never do this to you.”

Sav’s eyes rose to mine, and for a moment, they flickered with a gleam of hope. “Tate, I don’t know what to believe,” she choked out.

“Believe me, Sav. Believe in us.”

Chelsea pushed her way between Sav and me and got in my face. “Well if it’s not new, Tate, how do I know that you went shopping with Tanzi and Jack the other day? How do I know that you only had a few hours a day to spend with me because Savannah was working? How do I know that you were pissed off about Sav having lunch with Blake?”

“You told her?” Sav gasped and stepped back even closer to Blake.

“Sav, no! I don’t know how she knows this. Sav, please believe me. She is fucked up. I would never ever do this to you. Why would I? Believe me.
Trust
me.”

The feeling that my world was crashing down around me consumed me and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. My heart was beating hard, trying to completely rip itself out of my chest and go to Savannah, to show her that it belonged to her, to show her that she owned it. I hadn’t done one of these accusations, but why would Sav believe me? What reason did she possibly have? She had evidence, she had a video, and she had the word of two people against mine but all I wanted was for her to believe in me.

“Tate, I don’t know what to believe. I think you should just leave. I just need to be on my own.”

And in a split second Savannah’s words destroyed me.

My mouth was as dry as the desert, my eyes scratchy and my words gone. There was nothing I could say or do. I could fight, I wanted to fight with every part of my being but what would it get me? My pleads would go unnoticed and my promises would be laughed upon.