Cailín (Lass) (Anam Céile Chronicles) (36 page)

Me eyes
darted about at the slightest sound.  Me body stuck in severely distorted angles,
there be pain even when completely still I be, ‘twas constant and numbing,
throbbing, me head ached, dizziness. 

Then
there be the pain when I moved.  Beyond excruciating ‘twas: nauseating, sharp,
made me want to panic, though I could not. 

I found
meself keeping count of time by the number of tides that had washed up over
me.  Waiting fer night to fall to find relief from suffering through the
ruthless time of the day when the sun persisted with its slow scorching of me
exposed flesh. I found temporary respite when the clouds blew in and the rain
began falling upon me. 

Still,
‘twas not long before that, too became irritating, as I had no choice but to
endure it drop after drop— in me face, me eyes, stinging me wounds, taunting
me, helpless to put me hands up to block it.  Then as night fell and so did the
rain continue, afflicted I be with the constant chills, trying desperately to
control me shivering, fer I be wracked with pain each time I did.

The way
the rain comes down hard, that be how I feel inside.

The
next morning I awoke to a crab crawling over me body.  I watched it out of the
side of me eye as it crawled over me shoulder, across me breasts, and down to
me delicate lower belly where it decidedly pinched me.  I flinched sharply, promptly
instigating yet more pain. 

Lying
there helpless as I be, the seabirds took liberty in diving down and pecking at
me ruthlessly, the only thing I could do be to shout in attempt to scare them
away; alas, it did naught to deter them.  I discovered another diversion of
passing the time by watching the blood seeping from me wounds, and then with
each tide that washed it away with the cleansing sting of the saltwater, able I
be to resume from the beginning!

Then,
on the second day, I be able to almost bearably twitch me fingers and toes.
 
Me feet were bare and slashed open.
               

Over
the period of what I calculated to be three days— and through treacherously
slow excruciating pain and monumental effort— I managed to straighten out me
legs and back to lie nearly level. 

What a
significant relief that be! 

I
learnt to breathe slowly and deeply to ease the pain whilst counting the
forceful thudding of me heart. 

A mild
distraction ‘twas, nonetheless.

Yet,
shockingly, I noted that the pain becoming duller, and not sure I be whether ‘twas
actually getting better, or if I merely be growing accustomed to it.  I thought
‘twas implausible that I could have begun healing in that short of time.  Nor
did I welcome the prospect, still hoping fer death, but knowing that likely it
had passed me by fer whatever God-forsaken reason.

Lie
there fer several days I did, the sun scorching me skin relentlessly, praying
to die fer all the pain I be in, yet I distinguished that apparently not be me
destiny, although I willed it to be so.  Screaming at the heavens, sun and sky
became me new pursuit.

I tried
to kill me pain, but only bled more.  Now pouring out crimson regret and
betrayal I be.  Dying . . . praying . . . bleeding . . . screaming.

As the
night drew in, the dread and the pain in me body eased, doing naught to ease
the hideous pain in that which had become me heart.

Me
hunger crept in so powerful, as never before I had suffered.  ‘Twas the most
intense hunger ever I have endured.  ‘Twas as though me body be clawing and
tearing at me stomach, devouring it steadily; me stomach struggling to fight
back, but rapidly deteriorating, nevertheless. 

‘Twas
both astounded and appalled I be to literally feel me body steadily restoring
itself.  Yet after being trapped as that fer days, aware I be this unwelcome
progression would be expeditious were I to reap some sort of sustenance, fer I
be weak and starving fer any form of mercy.

I be
famished and in need of consuming food, so when the tide moved out fully I
discovered some carrageen growing in little bunches as they do upon the rocky
outcrops on the seashores.  A clustre of grapes they resemble, with all the
grapes plucked off.
 By then I be able to move me
arm just enough to strain to reach some to grab off the rocks. 

Ravenously,
I crammed the still sopping handful of the deep burgundy, nearly black seaweed,
into me blistered, cracked mouth.  I puckered at its distinctive extreme briny
taste still reminiscent of the sea from whence it had come.

Underneath
the cover of the carrageen, I discovered some periwinkles hidden, small
blue-black shell animals attached to the rocks off the seashore.  I occupied
meself fer the greater part of the day prying one after another open to extract
the tiny amount of tasty meat in each shell, ‘til they be gone, every one.

A
couple of days later, I awoke to a lovely foggy morning.  But me elevated mood ‘twas
quickly banished when I sensed a person moving toward me, though still some
distance away.  I became nervous, lying there blatantly naked as I be, but
still I hoped they would have only the best of intentions regarding me.

Gradually,
I could make out the figure approaching.  I already knew from the scent the
person would be male, and just one.  And finally, out from the fog stepped a
fisherman, and likely as old as me father he be. 

To me
disappointment, I quickly recognised the same look of lust and carnage in his
eyes as those brutes who assaulted me on the ship. 

‘Tis
most clear he expects to be having his way with me and undoubtedly then shall
leaving me fer dead, as when he came.  No true harm done then, after all,
right?  Perhaps he believes he’ll be assisting me toward me certain death
sooner than this protracted anticipation I be torturously engaged in presently.

Thus,
crawling with repugnance, there I remained lying with me eyes shut tight,
waiting fer him to come near to me, whilst fully grasping his intent with me. 

He moved
toward me, vilely remarking to himself under his drunken breath on the luck of
his stumbling upon this delectable stark-naked and destitute female.  I heard
him tugging the suspenders from his shoulders and the clanking sound of him
disengaging the belt of his trousers. 

He
crouched next to me, his stench permeating me nostrils as he inclined closer to
me and proceeded to deliver his pitiless bites upon me breasts whilst
sniggering, his putrid breath shooting onto me in outbursts.  I could feel the
subtle vibrations from his pulsating veins, the all-consuming thirst in me acutely
intensifying, invading me mouth. 

Not
able to tolerate his foul slobber upon me flesh another moment, I strained me
head upwards the slightest and seized him by the neck, piercing into him with
me teeth.  The initial abrupt burst leaves me gasping fer more, he beside me
thrashing about, nearly evading me frail hold upon him.  I locked me jaw onto
him and he stiffened as his bitter blood saturated me parched mouth, drawing
his essence into me throat, filling me belly with his life. 

As the
fount waned, the thrashing did cease altogether. 

Astounded
I be when rapidly, I be able to lift me head easily, sit up and rise to me feet
in one lithe motion.
 
Though disgusted I be
at feeding off the brute, I could not get over the supernatural renewal I had experienced. 

I held
me arms out and looked down at meself.  There be not a sign of me ever having
been injured in such a way!  I tried out every part of me body, moving it as
though I were dancing. 

Perfect!

Then
able to be up and walking about, I be able forage some more seafood to fill me
limitless belly!  I skirted the shoreline to walk along the water’s edge, to
feel once again me bare feet comfortably sinking into the loamy sand . . . an
exhilarating experience! 

When
the tide moved fully out, the sea calm and about to turn, closely I looked to
the water’s edge fer little indentations in the sand— almost as if a person
pressed hard with their thumb— fer
scian mara
, or “sea knife”, little
fishes which live in shells about fifteen centimetres long.

Into the
sand I dug with me fingers, but deceptively elusive they be and adept at
burrowing deeper into the sand.  Surprised I be when instead of a shellfish, I
dug up a spectacular amethyst coloured sea-urchin.  I thought better of eating
it and replaced the sea-urchin safely beneath the sand.  After quite the day of
monotonous efforts, I ingested enough of them to sustain me fer the meanwhile.

I
decided
to take a repose. 

Which
gave me the unwanted opportunity to think.

I
cannot return, fer the life I have left behind me be cold now
. 
Lost
I be and never can I return.  Aye.  Never again can I go back home. 

Wander
'til the end of time I will, torn away from you ‘til you come back to me.

I will
find you, Donovan. 

Together
we will be as we were destined, even if it takes the whole of eternity. 

Never
will I cease me searching fer you! 

This I do
promise you!

A
t long
last, Aislinn took a deep breath and looked over to Tenzin.  His eyes were
overcome with sorrow. 

She gazed
at him questioningly.

He took
an extended inhalation before speaking.  “Aislinn, that
is
much to
absorb.  I can only begin by saying you do have my regrets for your loss. 
Though I have never experienced the kind of love of which you speak, still I
can imagine what you must have been feeling.  I can discern the immense impact
it has had upon you, still these centuries later.”

Her
eyes turned down, the enduring melancholy present in them still.  “Thank you,
Tenzin.  The compassion you have shown me, it does mean so much to me.”

“Moreover,
my deepest remorse lies in the manner in which you were awakened to your true
self.  In all actuality, admittedly, I am rather repulsed by it all.  Voljidaar
had no right to subject you to those things he did.  That is in vast conflict
to the manner in which it should be done.  The awakening of one’s spirit is
intended to be a glorious occasion, not one to be disgraced by lascivious
cravings of the flesh!  Let us commence now Aislinn, the reparation of the
detriment to which you have been submitted.”

“Indeed,
and to you ever more grateful I will be!  Yet, I entreat you abide, heed
further as that be merely the beginning to me story.  A great deal more I do have
to reveal.  And
Dia
knows, in excessive need of the reprieve of
confession I be!”

Another
deep breath Tenzin took, and settled in to listen more. 

Aislinn
was aware that her account would not be without difficulty for one as him to
receive; which made her all the more appreciative that he was so inclined, for
her sake.