Cherish the Land (15 page)

“Perkins, hold him steady,” Jeremy ordered.

“Keep a close eye on him,” Jason added. “He’s sedated and I’ve numbed the area as well, but that doesn’t mean he won’t react when I start working on him. If he starts acting like he’s in distress, tell me.”

Perkins’s disgusted glare told Jason exactly what he thought about a “kid” telling him how to do his job, but Jason didn’t fancy getting kicked in the head while he worked.

While Jason waited for the lidocaine to kick in around the laceration, he grabbed the antiseptic wash and started rinsing the areas he’d already prepared. With the blood washed away, most of them weren’t as serious as he’d feared, which was a good sign, but that exposed tendon haunted him. He didn’t want to put down an animal the first time he was called out, especially when it was Jeremy’s horse. Not just a Taylor Peak horse, but Jeremy’s horse. Jason could all too easily imagine how he’d feel if someone told him he had to put his dog Polly down. He didn’t want to be the one to say those words to Jeremy. A couple of the other lacerations, though not as serious as the one on Misfit’s flexor tendon, would need sutures as well, so he injected them with lidocaine too. When he thought it had been long enough, he went back to where Jeremy was still standing, staring at the injured leg.

“Go stand at his head again,” he told Jeremy. “You’ll steady him like no one else can.” And if it would keep Jeremy from hovering over Jason while he worked, all the better. Jason didn’t want anyone to see the way his hands trembled as he shaved the area around the gash and poured antiseptic into it. Once the worst of the gore was out of the way, he examined the tendon for any visible damage. He couldn’t see any, which was a good sign. At the very least, it wasn’t ruptured, and any more minor damage would heal, given time. Testing it would have told him that if he’d been thinking when he started. He cursed under his breath. He should have had them walk Misfit around to see if he was limping before he sedated him and numbed the area. Then he would have had a better idea of any damage. Too late now, though. He’d have to suture the wound and hope for the best.

He sutured that one up and sprayed it to keep the flies off, then moved back to the others he’d numbed. Everything else was easy in comparison—serious enough to need cleaning and suturing, but not serious enough to worry about beyond that unless they got infected.

And then he was back at Misfit’s head, with Jeremy watching him worriedly. “The tendon looked intact. He’ll be stiff and sore, and that one will take the longest to heal, but he should recover. I’ll give him an antibiotic and tetanus shot booster now and leave bute sachets to put in his food for the next few days, but unless he takes a bad turn, all he needs now is time and restricted activity to heal. Keep the sutures clean and call me if you see anything that concerns you.”

Perkins took that as his cue to leave. Jason frowned after him. Macklin would’ve had a few words to say to the man about deserting his post, but Macklin wasn’t here, and Jason didn’t have the authority now that the emergency had passed.

“Thank you,” Jeremy said. “What do I owe you?”

Jason shrugged. “Let me replace the supplies I used and I’ll send you a bill.”

“No,” Jeremy protested. “You do a vet’s work, you earn a vet’s pay.”

Jason smiled. “Pretty sure I decide what to charge for my own time. I’ll send Sam the bill. You just take good care of this old boy and get that barbed wire cleaned up so it doesn’t happen again.”

“I’m doing the best I know how,” Jeremy said, “but it hasn’t been easy, even with Walker throwing his support behind me 100 percent.”

“Have you asked Neil about lending you a crew for a day? You could send them out to do nothing but check for trash like this. It would be better than animals getting caught in it unexpectedly.”

Jeremy shook his head. “Neil would send one in a heartbeat, but things are tense enough around here without me making it worse by turning to Lang Downs every time I need something. I’m pretty sure Charlie White, one of my year-rounders, is the only one who actually believes I can do this.”

“Sam believes it.”

“Sam loves me. He has to believe it.”

“I believe it,” Jason said, “and I like and admire you, but I’m sure not in love with you. So there.”

“You don’t live here,” Jeremy countered. “It’s not the same thing.”

“I’m sorry. I wish there was more I could do.”

“You’ve done plenty,” Jeremy said. “You patched up Misfit. The rest will sort itself out eventually. Say hello to everyone on the station for me.”

“I will,” Jason promised. “And you call me if there’s anything else I can do, as a vet or just as a jackaroo. You aren’t in this alone, no matter how much it feels that way.”

“Thanks,” Jeremy said. “I’m going to get Misfit settled. I’ll call if anything changes.”

Jason knew a dismissal when he heard one, so he gathered up his equipment and headed back to the ute. No one was standing around staring when he left the barn, but he knew better than to think no one was watching. He stowed his bag, climbed in the ute, and headed toward home. He only hoped he got there before he collapsed. His heart was still trying to pound its way out of his chest. It would be too late to ride out to help rotate the mobs like he’d originally planned to do that afternoon, but he’d still have an hour or so to kill before everyone came in to clean up before dinner. He’d do what he always did when he had time to kill—he’d head to the tractor shed. As a child, his father had always been there. As a teen, it was the likeliest place to find Seth. Jason hadn’t asked Seth what he planned to work on today, but if he wasn’t scoping out drover’s huts, he would be there. The smell of engine oil and petrol relaxed him like nothing else could.

“S
ETH
?”

The sound of Jason’s voice calling his name broke Seth’s focus on the plans he was drawing for the windmill installation at one of the drover’s huts. It had too much tree cover for him to feel comfortable relying on solar panels for the generator, but the ridge above it was the ideal spot for a windmill.

“Hey, Jase, you’re back. Is everything okay down at Taylor Peak? I saw you tear out of here earlier.” He set his pencil on the table where he’d been working and joined Jason toward the back of the shed on the pile of hay bales that had been their frequent hideaway when they were younger.

“I’m not sure ‘okay’ is the word I’d use, but I did my best,” Jason said. “Jeremy’s horse tangled with some barbed wire that had been left in one of the outer paddocks, and you know how that goes.”

Seth knew exactly how that went. Caine and Macklin were careful, so it didn’t happen often, but he’d seen what barbed wire could do to an animal. They’d had to butcher a couple of sheep that got scared by a storm and bolted into a fence. “The horse lost. Is it going to make it?”

“He was still standing when I got there, and the bleeding had stopped. He had some deep punctures and lacerations, but only one of them was serious by itself. It was right near his flexor tendon, and if it had ruptured the tendon, I couldn’t have saved him.”

“But it hadn’t,” Seth said. “You didn’t have to put him down.” He wasn’t even an animal lover the way so many of the jackaroos were, but he hated it when they had to put an animal down. The sheep didn’t bother him—that’s what they were there for—but the death of the working animals on the station left a pall for weeks. Taylor Peak had enough grief right now. They didn’t need the death of a horse—Jeremy’s horse—on top of it.

“No, the tendon looked intact, so as long as none of the wounds get infected, he should be fine in a few weeks. That wasn’t the problem.”

“Then what was?”

“Why would anyone in their right mind trust me to take care of an injured animal?” Jason asked.

Now there was a stupid question if Seth had ever heard one. For as long as he’d known him, Jason was the one to take in strays—okay, not Little Bit, but only because Sam got there first—or to trail along behind the vet or even to offer to deal with minor injuries so they wouldn’t have to call the vet. Maybe he hadn’t ever dealt with anything this serious, but he’d certainly proven his competence more than once. “Because you’re a vet? What makes you ask that question? Did something go wrong?”

“I have a fancy diploma to put on my wall,” Jason corrected. “It’s not the same thing.”

It was so much more than a bloody diploma, but Seth had done enough questioning of his own credentials to recognize the look on Jason’s face. “It looks like it from where I’m sitting.”

“I spent the entire time I was down there convinced I was going to do something wrong,” Jason admitted.

“But did you actually do something wrong?” Self-doubt was Seth’s status quo, but it had never been Jason’s default when they were kids. Had something gone wrong in vet school to shake Jason’s confidence so much?

“One thing. I didn’t see the bad laceration before I sedated the horse so I couldn’t walk him around to see how much damage he’d done to it like I should have.”

“But did that keep you from treating him and will it keep him from making a full recovery?” Seth pressed. He hated seeing the dejected look on Jason’s face, but the greedy part of him was gleeful that Jason had come to him with those fears, not his boyfriend. Cooper might be the one he slept with—Seth resolutely pushed that thought aside—but Seth was the one he came to for comfort. He didn’t know a lot where relationships were concerned, but comfort surely lasted longer than sex.

“It shouldn’t, but you never know with horses. I like sheep. Sheep are easy. Horses are a pain in the arse.”

“Horses are a part of life on the station,” Seth said with a shrug. He’d even learned to ride one, mechanic that he was. He only rode them when he had no other choice, but sometimes the weather got so bad the roads were impassable, and then knowing how to ride could save someone’s life. He’d heard the stories about Caine saving Neil, and since he owed Chris’s life in part to Neil’s loyalty, he hadn’t refused. He’d never be the stockman the others were, but he could keep his arse in the saddle well enough. “You knew that when you decided to come back here instead of opening a clinic in town, where you wouldn’t have to deal with them.”

“It wasn’t home,” Jason said. “This is what I’ve always wanted to do. I just have to figure out how to do it.”

It wasn’t home
. How many times had Seth thought that exact thing when he was in Sydney? They were a pair of dropkicks, but they’d both learned their lesson and come home. The rest would come in time.

“One day at a time,” Seth replied. “Isn’t that how we do everything?”

Jason laughed. “Yeah, I guess it is. Enough of my whinging. How was your day?”

“Don’t change the subject,” Seth said. Jason had talked about what happened, but he wasn’t feeling any better, and nothing he’d said explained why he was upset. Seth knew how much pent-up emotions could hurt. He wouldn’t let Jason do that to himself. “I can tell you’re upset, but what you’re saying doesn’t line up with that. So tell me what’s really going on.”

Jason sighed. “It was just…. The whole time I was working, I felt like a fraud, you know? Like that fancy diploma wasn’t worth the paper it was printed on. And then there were the jackaroos. Jeremy was there, so Perkins didn’t say anything, but it felt like the whole station was watching and judging me. They don’t know me from Adam, but I’m young and I’m not Dr. Nelson, and I came in from Lang Downs. I could have performed a miracle and they would have found a way to turn it against me.”

“Why do you care what they think?” Seth asked. “Jeremy trusts you enough to call you, and from what you said, his trust wasn’t misplaced. Caine trusts you enough to keep an eye on everything here, even with all the regulations about treatment in order to keep the station’s organic certification.”

“I’d be willing to bet I know a lot more about treatment options on organic outfits than Dr. Nelson does,” Jason said.

“See?” Seth said. “Nothing to worry about. So why do you care what the Taylor Peak jackaroos think of you?”

“Because it’s hard not to care,” Jason said. “Yes, I’m the one Jeremy called, but there was this weight hanging over the barn, and I guess it got to me.”

“I know the solution to that,” Seth said.

“What’s that?” Jason asked.

“A beer. Chris has Tooheys at the house, but we could probably find something else if you don’t want that.”

“Tooheys is fine,” Jason said. “And yeah, a beer sounds good. Maybe I’ll be able to relax then.”

“Are you that much of a lightweight?” Seth teased. “Come on. We’ll go sit on the veranda and drink a beer or two and you’ll feel better.”

Jason smiled. “You always make me feel better. That’s why I came in here.”

Seth’s heart bloomed beneath the words. Let Cooper chew on that for a while. Seth was still Jason’s source of solace when he needed it, and he’d be damned if he’d let anyone take that away from him.

J
ASON
WALKED
into the canteen with Seth, all but doubled over with laughter. He never stopped marveling at how Seth could put everything back in perspective for him. His first solo experience as a vet was under his belt now. Misfit would be fine in time. He could do this.